Anyone got any weapons around?

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>>64546929
Yes, why the hell would you stick a gas canister on an MP5?

>>64546929
We're a mining ship chuck, not a fucking pirate ship.

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>>64546929
Also why would you give the Canadian version of the Minimi to Santa?

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>>64546929
>>64546938
Explaining picrel...
Remarkably short sighted to head off into deep space and to assume you're going to be all that is.

>>64546921
Look, I know parts of the ship are in zero-G.
But for fuck's sake: stop roping fat loads into the zero-G spaces.
>it disgusting
>it smells
>it ruins electronics
I know somebody is trying to create "planet Splooge".
STOP IT

Smeg heads

>>64546946
Have they ever been effective against anything though?

>>64547973
They killed the psirens just fine in season 4.
Also gibe garbage canon.

>ROCK
>AND
>STONE

>>64546921
I saw something that resembled a big spider with a long tail in Docking Bay 327, it escaped into a vent before I could stomp it
dyou fellas think it's a problem?

ATTENTION LIEUTENANT RIMMER:GASPATCHO SOUP, THAT IS ALL.

>>64546921
Oh for fuck's sake... We got fined by the inner planets. AGAIN.

Who's been flinging rocks towards the inner solar system?
The ticket claims it's an M-type rock in the 50-100 ton mass range, originating from our last week's orbital position. M-type! IT WAS FULL OF METAL!! IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORTH A LOT YOU CHUCKLEFUCKS!

>>64548062
>He actually made officer

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>>64548012
ROCK AND STONE TO THE BONE

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You guys are weird.

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AIRLOCK STUCK
AIRLOCK STUCK
PLEASE I BEG YOU

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>>64548279
Get back to work Judeau.

Thanks muchly

>>64546929
yeah, I do. how much are you willing to pay though?

>>64546946
There are robots on the Red Dwarf that have a higher rank than Dave Lister

>>64548370
There are single celled organisms on the Red Dwarf that have higher rank tan Dave Lister.

i swear i saw something cruise by the window in atmosphere, looked like it had wings...you guys think we could load some birdshot into some of the kiln guns' shells?

>>64547765
Who's the cum bandit of 69 deck? Own up, now.

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*siiip* yeeeeeeeep it's the mlk1 for me, ol' faithful
There was this one time back on feegee...

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>>64546921
Alright boys! Let's see what we can get from this scrap heap.

>>64546934
According to the Red Dwarf RPG (its pretty obscure I know) its a caseless rifle.

"Canary Rifle (C-180A) Standard issue to all Canaries on dangerous missions, especially shower night, the C-180 Assault Rifle can fire in single shot mode, 3-round burst, and full auto. It uses a Standard Space Corps Penal System caselessbround and can be programmed not to fire on wardensbor other specific personnel. Unfortunately, this does not mean such targets cannot be hit by ricochets or other accidental fire. Skill: Firearms"

https://archive.org/details/reddwarfrpg/Red%20Dwarf%20RPG%20Extra%20Bits%20Book/page/n13/mode/2up

>>64548983
I think they changed the design so the cast would stop breaking them by accident, but the MK 1 is better imo.

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>>64546929
I wanna know why there was a single antique sawn off shotgun onboard.

>>64548083
>IT'S COLD OUTSIDE THERE'S NO KIND OF ATMOSPHERE!

>>64546921
It's cold outside.

>>64548083
>Who's been flinging rocks towards the inner solar system?
sucks to be on the bottom of the gravity well

>>64546929
Don't tell the boss but I brought my trusty Beretta 92.
Also wanna borrow from my manga collection?

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>>64546929

Must I really recite Space Corps Directive 5796 and get you all written up for illegal possession of unregistered weapons?

>>64548983
>Bazookoid
Red dwarf was ahead of its time lmao

>>64549761
earthys aren't coming to save you, get with the program and man the rusty, clapped out m2 the pirates are almost through the door

>>64549761
Rimmer you can smeg off, Iy'm having this shotgun whether you like it or noh, and if you don't shut up about it I'll shove it up yer light drive till yer spewing pellets out yer mouth while I burn that naked picture of your gramdmotheh.
Now shut up and help me look for a bahzookah we're gonna need it.

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>>64548045

I wouldn't worry about it. What's the worst that could happen?

>>64547973
>Have they ever been effective against anything though?
That's more of an issue with the usual space-nasty being incredibly powerful, than Bazookoids being weak.
It blew up the Polymorph just fine. Described as an eight foot tall armor plated killing machine.

>>64546942
>why would you give the Canadian version of the Minimi to Santa?
Are you confused about what the naughty list is for?

>>64549395
>I wanna know why there was a single antique sawn off shotgun onboard
Some security officer's personal weapon, they brought it on board for close encounters.

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>>64549395
Well you see I heard they were handy for close encounters from this historical documentary I once saw called Aliens.

FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOUR MARKER!

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>>64546938
>We're a mining ship
The Nostromo was arguably a mining vessel, at least it was an ore hauler.

And as for the USG Ishimura...

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>>64549761
Space Corps Directive 5796, no member of the Corps shall attempt oral sex on an alien while riding a bicycle?

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Whatever you guys do, DO NOT try deep sea drilling on Europa. The things I’ve seen down there…it’s not safe enough for mining equipment let alone humans.

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>Space Corps directive 1704: no officer shall carry his Sig P320 with one in the chamber?

>>64551280
Praise the Honkmother!

>>64552326
kek

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>>64550740

>>64546921
BRB on my way to the Mars colony to mine some uranium

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>>64546946
all you need in deep space is this

>>64554122
So one shot stuns, two shot kills, three disintegrates but how? Who decides the time? Is it like swimming where you shouldn't go until an hour after you eat?

>>64553271
You'll have to submit to a background check first. Nothing serious just making sure you don't have ties to anyone crazy like MIDA or something, which you don't of course.

>>64546921
Just finished watching this whole series a week or so ago

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For me it's a Callahan full-bore auto-lock. Customized trigger, double cartridge thorough gauge.
I call her Vera and none of you fucks better not even think about touching her.

>>64555906
>background check first
Don't mind that. But last time I went the whole background check process seemed wrong.
>fingerprints : ok
>retina scan : ok
>anal probe : why?
>and why was the anal probe done manually?!
It's room 3213 for the background check, right?

>>64555906

>MIDA

REMOVE MIDA REMOVE MIDA MISRIAH MASSACRE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE GET BATTLEROIDED GET BATTLEROIDED PLASMA PLASMA PLASMA GET BATTLEROIDED

>>64546921
This is a reminder for retro sci-fi fans to rewatch Outland
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-J8mOOtS7XI

>>64555945
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Q3pdj9p6yI