A dragon has claimed your city and is snatching up citizens to be part of its treasure hordeHow would you, an ordinary citizen, take it out with only the weapons available to you? It has tough scales, can fly, spew fire, and is large enough to swallow a person whole. What can you do with the weapons and ordinance of a single civilian to kill it?
>>64676766Shoot it in the head with a 25-06.
>>64676766Shoot it with muh dik.
I want to be part of the dragon's hoard
>>64676766Is the dragon male or female?
>>64676766FPV it in the wing, then once it lands empty all 20 of the mags I have loaded for my PTR-91 into its soft underbelly, if that doesn't do it then I will be forced to start unloading the 5000+ rounds of 7N6 I have for my AK-74. If that doesn't work then I will be forced to shoot it with my uncle Bubha's certified PISSING HOT HANDLOADS in .45LC for my Uberti. If all that doesn't do it I guess I'll die knowing I did my part.
>>64676797Female. She has a clutch of fertile eggs that she's getting ready to lay so it's all the more important that you kill her now.
>>64676766if I'm part of it's hoard, do I still have to pay taxes?
Propose marriage to the dragon and profess my undying love
>>64676801A fertile female dragon you say... Hmm, tell me more about her... Anatomy
>>64676766Shape charges on sugar candy rockets and air burst CS, we're DIY spicy panzerschrecking bezos
I live in Akron, Ohio. I sit on my porch and sip Miller high lifes til the dragon is done cleaning the place up.
>>64676820If the dragon claims you, you will be forced into a life of eternal servitude. Is it really worth the risk?
>>64676766>Katana (shock steel) & 1911A2 customWorks with nigggers, should works with oversized lizards
>>64676766Fees it some fentanyl zombies and let nature take its course
>>64676825>AkronThat might actually be an improvement.
>>64676825Like I wasn't doing that anyways? I have a mortgage and property taxes to pay, anon. Shit, my car probably won't even pass e-check next year. Give me to the fuckin dragon already, I'm over it.
>>64676869Yeah but at least your job has dignity, you're not crawling into a dragon's mouth to brush its teeth or polishing its scales or massaging its paws
>>64676766Kill it?Why would I do that?She can take me, as long as she burns down the university and everything associated with it first.All hail Our Lady of the Burning Flame!
Why is everyone trying to fuck the dragon?
>>64676902Why aren't you trying to fuck the dragon?
>>64676913Idk
>>64676902why not? she's single, doesn't have any niglets, has her own hoard, no piercings and trash tats, ect. ect.
>>64676902Why is a woman’s virginity so highly prized?I’ll tell you. It’s because all men have an innate, driving desire to fuck where no man has fucked before. Now, apply that to a mythical species and you’d end up with a line of volunteers eagerly seeking to be Neil Dickstrong.
>>64676924Okay but you understand that you're more akin to a dildo when it comes to a dragon, right? Like, she's big enough you could be her buttplug, this isn't a 'conquest', this is you getting absolutely toyed with.
>>64676947and?
>>64676947>this is you getting absolutely toyed with.Hahaha wouldn't that be terrible if it happened to me
>>64676870>Yeah but at least your job has dignityMaking a lot of assumptions here.
>>64676766I volunteer to be part of its hoard. I'll wash its scales, floss between its teeth, polish its claws, whatever. Beats living alone.
>>64676766What's a treasure "horde"? A bunch of dragons that chases treasure?
>>64676766...dragon...https://static1.e621.net/data/9b/56/9b568f81e744f03512f2a4a12f275123.webm
>>64676870If I had even a shred of dignity left I wouldn't live in Akron.
>>64676766What size dragon are we talking? Car, locomotive, 747, smaug?
>>64676994Smaug-size
Can it turn into a human form like most dragons?
>>64676999No
>>64676997Alright smaug might be a bad example he's inconsistently sized - but assuming a ~150 meter head to tail size with wings to match.There isn't a lot that can be done as a civ.A silly dream of a plan would be to shred it's wings with massed small arms fire and have it crash into a fuckmassive bunch of tannerite. The underside of a dragon while smoother wouldn't logically be any softer or weaker as essentially all threats barring other dragons would come from beneath - makes more sense that it'd have layers of subcutaneous protection, so just shooting it in the gut won't work. Top side it's got the hard and craggy scales. But wing membranes are thin by necessity of function, that could limit mobility. From there, lead it into a tannerite laden trap and hope the blast is enough. If it can rip a car to shreds it might be.That said I'm obviously unemployed with no prospects so being enslaved by a dragon sounds like a net positive.
>>64676799>not whipping out the KA-BAR or bayonetDo you like your cocks black or white?
>>64676869>e-checkOhioanon… is this a thing now?t. Cincinnatifag
>>64677014>so being enslaved by a dragon sounds like a net positive.What the fuck is wrong with you people, where's your pride
>>64677001I can work with that.
>>64677028Urbus Delenda Est.Nothing in a city is a "person" much less a "person with pride"
>>64677028Ain't got shit to be proud of, anon. No job, no prospects, no girl, poor as dirt, broken body.
>>64677039You're a free man, and a citizen, not some...monster's plaything.
>>64677022Maybe, what's it to yah punk?
>>64677026No, it's only for like, Cuyahoga county and every county surrounding it. Trust me, you'd know if you were subject to it, you couldn't register your car each year otherwise. The state, or someone on their behalf, has actually been fighting with the EPA to do away entirely with it here, since emissions have gone way down since they first forced this shit on us back in the 70s or so.
>>64676947>Buttplug for a dragonCover me in lube and shove me into a dragon's asshole, I am ready.
>>64677028my cities heraldic devise is a dragonthere's frankly no shame in being loyal to a dragon aswellbeats being loyal to some house of elected liars and scoundrel
>>64676766Is the dragon a competent statesman? I'd take a competent Dragon over the cesspool that we have here now.t. Washingtonoid
>>64677090I'm not a pearl clutching ecofag or anything but if your river has literally lit on fire multiple times from pollution maybe something should be done about it.
>>64676766Does the dragon hate indians?
I'm really good at dancing, I can do a little Ricardo dance for the dragon
>>64677287>I'm not a pearl clutching ecofag or anything but if your river has literally lit on fire multiple times from pollution maybe something should be done about it.Thats not from cars but from china tier industrial waste dumping. Emission checks for cars is to check the level of nitro oxide emissions.
>>64676766Sex
>>64676902I could go on a spiel about the fetishizing of dragons in particular but basically they were originally scary because nature itself was scary and you never knew what might leap from trees and kill you. Nowadays technology has essentially "tamed" nature so the dragon has sort of shifted into a sex symbol as an expression of our feeling of dominance over what was once a scary threat.
>>64677373That's pseud drivel to justify wanting to fuck an animal. You're on /k/, there are people that fuck deer here. Stop being a pussy about it.That said you should all be shot.
>>64676811A 16 inch shell can be used as a butt plug. But you have to weld on the flare.
>>64676924Not really, its the insecurity of being compared and lesser than someone else.
>>64677475Would you say that someone is insecure for preferring a fresh sandwich over a sandwich that has another man's cum inside it?
>>64677492Not the same.
>>64676801>>64676825I volunteer as a willing sex slave and bodyguard. Since dragons can polymorph we will sire legions of elite half-dragon troops to further help her clear the city and, hopefully, the rest of the country/world. Would humbly ask my mistress to let me collect guns under the guise of adding them to her hoard.>t. D&D 3.5 devotee who's sick of this gay, stupid earth.
Go for the eyes boo
>>64676902>snatching up citizens to be part of its treasure hordeWhy is the dragon trying to fuck everyone?
