Were ghost hawks also used in Venezuela?
>>64719411>Tonight, at Top Gun>I fly a Cobra over Caracas>Richard cuts the power>and James says hi to president Maduro>"Hi."
>>64719624>and James says hi to president Maduro>"Hi."
>>64719624>meanwhile I replaced May‘s ammo with blanks>CLARKSON!
>>64719649>"very funny">"what?">"that gentleman who I mistook for my gardener nearly blew my bloody head off because I had what is basically a military grade party popper to fight him with">*clarkson and hammond peel off camera laughing*>"I head to beat him to death with the butt of the rifle"
>>64719411>Alright Jeremy we're right above, release the bombs>Are you sure this is the right place, James?>It must be, it's the only place with power and soldiers around>HAMMOND you bloody idiot, it's the mausoleum to Hugo Chávez >What? Nooo, wouldn't that be Hanoi?>And on that bombshell...
>>64719411>hello viewers>you are probably wondering what I'm doing in the back of a Venezuelan technical holding an AK
>So the producers are taking the stealth hawk away?>They what? >Yes. We now have a new challenge, drive Maduro back to the US. We may select any vehicle we can take a gunpoint>Does that include tanks>Oh right, they said no tanks, we cant start a border war in South America>Whats the fun in that? >Well they didnt mention no armored cars did they?
> ...James May showing up to what would most definitely be a CQB with an RPG...>"Hello viewers. As you would imagined, I have done this properly">"I've carefully selected a weapon which combines great reliability with devastating efficiency in a country which deployed it for years and years, so the spare parts and warheads are plentiful"
>"May">"hm?">"that man you just shot">"the one with the mustache?">"yes.. that one. I don't think the Americans wanted him dead">"oh dear"
>>64722560>*cut to footage of an endless stream of RPGs impacting the Chavez mausoleum*
Good thread
>>64720438‘ad a giggle
>>64719411>oh look, we can fit 4 soldiers and still have enough room in the boot for Maduro
>>64719411>Tonight, Nicolas Maduro will lap the caribbean on a reasonably priced Apache
>>64719411>Tonight on Top Gear: Hammond attempts to outfly a Soviet anti-air missile; James tries to hit the broad side of a Venezuelan barn; and I try to kidnap a sitting head of state, all from out the window of one of the world's most unsung military machines. It bumbles along at a modest 200 miles an hour. It's fat-shamed by sleeker aircraft, but its insides are straight out of science fiction. Its name surprisingly has not been cancelled for cultural appropriation by the woke mob, yet. Ladies and gentlemen, tonight Top Gear topples governments in... the CHINOOK!
>>64719624>Not HelloOtherwise top kek.
Two British SAS commandos mourn the loss of their comrad after a raid behind German lines in occupied France. circa 1942
>>64719411JM: Hold on Clarkson, you're shooting at Cubans!JC: Well what's the difference?RH: YOU CAN'T SAY THATJC: Oh. We'll edit that out.
Put me in the screencap
>Oh no, I've broken Chavez's Mausoleum.
>>64719411>implying magic skill and not luckEmancipation from 20th Century delusion pls
Good start to the year, /k/.Keep it up.
The Venezuelans fail to launch their S-300s
>Clarkson: This weekend I was wondering what is the most terrifying thing about our army.>Hammond: Have you been on the internet?>Clarkson: Yes I have! And I found this...
Would the Top Gear Tent be the Command Tent at Mara-a-Lago?
>>64725977Considering he did say he could fight a small war or control an aircraft carrier from it you have no idea how well that fits.
>>64719411Top Gear Venezuela Special: you capture Maduro by driving through the Amazon like the Bolivia specialWhat's the best car for this one, anons?
>And James forgets the name of the United States>US-BAlways gets me.
>>64724000>>64724096
>>64725276Best post, honestly.
I remember a few years ago during the previous round of "were gonna invade venezeula guys" and the russians sent some troops there some anon wrote a poem/car song about "On our way to venezuela in a clapped out btr"I had the screencap saved, but have since lost that drive and cannot remember the whole thing/know what Im talking about and perhaps have a copy?
>>64729044combat Prius
>>64729044As you can imagine, I've done this properly. What I've bought is a 2008 Cadillac Escalade, and I know what you're thinking, and believe me, I thought of it too, but, narcotics jokes aside, this IS the best of both worlds. It HAS 4-wheel drive, and off-road tyres, for those terrible Venezuelan jungle roads, and a custom bulletproofing bodge job. It's roomy enough to hold thirty days worth of provisions and fuel, and still has room for my M60. And, of course, it's fancy and comfortable enough to transport a head of state. Even one that's coming along unwillingly.
>>64719655Fuck that would be kino, please God i wish this was real.
>TONIGHT, on Bottom Gun>Hammond drifts the USS Gerald R Ford>*F16s sliding off the deck into the Pacific* >May defuses an IED>"Now the interesting thing about improvised explosives is that you can make them from easily accessible household items you could buy at M&S or Tescos, though I probably shouldn't be saying that on television otherwise the local constabulary might have a word with me." *fumbles the tools in his hand, allowing the striker to strike the detonator* "Cock.">And I conduct a Special Military Operation to invade Northern Wales>*running away from a mob of old women shaking broomsticks* "JAMES HELP I'VE GOT A GAGGLE OF CAMBRAIN GRANNIES AFTER MY PLUMS"
>>64732828>F16s on a carrierOnly on Bottom Gun!
>>64729044Make all 3 use trucks that they'd need to turn into technicals at some point, James gets a Toyota Hilux because that's a sensible option, Clarkson gets a Ranger and Hammond gets a 2nd gen Dodge Ram
>>64733672I believe the Hamster legit has a Ford Ranger Raptor in real life.
>>64725791>James imitating Maduro’s mother: “You sure you wouldn’t like to follow your father and become a trade union leader?”>Jeremy imitating Maduro: NO! I want to be a bus driver!”
>>64733742I'm talking about one of the older ones, maybe not the best idea, maybe a S10/GMC Sonoma, he could pretend it's a GMC Syclone
>>64719411Don’t need stealth when the plan is to obliterate enemy A2/AD in five minutes after flicking off the lights for the entire AO.
