I've been relentlessly wanting to transition ever since I've found out it was an option to begin with. I would immediately chose to be a woman if I could, and seeing woman around my age only ever fills me with envy and sorrow.And yet, I don't feel any dysphoria in relation to my own body, or how I am perceived.Do I have a masculine face? Yes, it is what it is.Do I have a masculine frame? Yes, it is what it is.Do I have a masculine voice? Yes, it is what it is.Am I being seen as a man by everybody else? Yes, and again, it is what it is.If I desire to be a woman so much, why don't I feel more dysphoria? Why is it so easy for me to just not care about all of this? Is this just radical acceptance? Am I dissociating more than I realize? Or am I simply just completely faketrans?The lack of dysphoria makes transition seem like an objectively insane thing do to. Despite wanting it, it feels like there's nothing for me to gain from it. Quite the opposite actually, transitioning will undeniably make life harder, and for what? Soft skin and gyno? I'm aware of how insensitive this is, but at this point I wish my dysphoria would be worse, so that I'd feel like a transition would be justified
Is this just a shallow and fleeting desire, stemming from vanity, or is there more beneath the surface, waiting to be slowly brought up to the surface?
>>40933614I don't know what you have, but I suggest you don't transition yet
>>40933614Take your pills, Alice. I don't understand what you mean by "no dysphoria" but everything will make sense once you start it. You will either continue or stop once you get bored.
>>40934044This surely is reasonable advice, but not transitioning feels like wasted time if I'm honest, despite not even knowing whether I truly want it>>40934161>I don't understand what you mean by "no dysphoria"I mean no dysphoria in the most direct way possible. I don't think I am dysphoric about being a man, since I pretty obviously don't feel any concrete distress from it. I'm just wholly indifferent to it, and can live just fine being one.I've even tried hormones for about 3 months, and it didn't make anything make more sense. Transitioning still felt like an insane thing to do, with which I was ruining my life, despite mostly wanting it. I've stopped hrt to give it more thought, or in hopes I'll realize it's even silly for me to consider taking it, but I'm still thinking about it months later.
