I thought mental changes from HRT were part placebo, or just came from being happy about your body improving and not getting worse, or they existed but just weren't gonna happen for me. I didn't feel any different. But I turned out to have been hondosing myself for the entire time I've been on HRT, even though I've still experienced feminization.After increasing my estrogen, I've been experiencing intense emotions again. Happiness is happier. Loneliness is lonelier. Sadness is sadder. I haven't felt this way since I was a child. I specifically remember around when I was in 6th grade (so like 11 or 12) I felt like my positive emotions suddenly dampened and the world became a darker and more depressing place - forever, I had assumed. Now I feel like life is good again. It really is like a chemical antidepressant. I feel like Pollyanna now.The only downside is that when I experience severe dysphoria, I break down crying for an hour instead of just feeling like trash with a blank face on. But overall I'm much happier now.
>>40970080yeah me too anon i was hondosing for several months then upped my levels and estrogen literally just turned me into my 12-14yo self but with all the memories and experiences etc i have now along with actually being able to feel emotions againaka it made me fucking psychotic uwu
>>40970104>literally just turned me into my 12-14yo self but with all the memories and experiences etc i have now along with actually being able to feel emotions againYeah, that's exactly how I'd describe it!And I feel like I was asleep with a veil clouding my vision, and now I'm awake, and in control of my life again, but stronger.From what I've heard of trans men, they feel more clear-headed and less irritable on T. It really does benefit us mentally to be on the hormone our brains were meant to run on.
>>40970080for me my emotions have all been heightened in a way Ive never really experienced before, which is kind of nuts. The more i look back on my life the more i realized how much i learned to repress from a young age im only now unpacking. e in general has also made me better at understanding myself.
>>40970080you should check your levels regardless of that. regularly checking your levels (especially early on) is like a bare minimum necessity for transitioning
>>40970620Yeah it was kinda stupid of me that I wasn't already checking my levels every three months, but luckily I haven't been on HRT for much longer than that (five months)
>>40970080feel like i my emotions were like this for a long time but arent any more, idk maybe ive learnt to cope with them or something desu im kinda worried ;~;
>>40972374Oh, maybe it's just a second puberty thing, then, and the intense emotions eill end, and that this is how the first puberty was supposed to be, but instead I just became depressed and had no emotions. Was it like that for you?
>>40972374nvm i think its just cause im depressed>>40972406emotions tended to be very intense and very quick, i was either extremely happy to an insane degree or i was consumed by the deepest of despairs. crying was common on both sides of the spectrum. idk guess its different for everyone
