>>41009760
This just shows the famous female empathy is a total myth and a lie, because women should be able to see how that's fucking devastating for a man to hear.

The idea of being settled for when she's had her fun makes me want to kill myself. Just end up in a Loveless marriage where she dreams of chad

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>>41009760
tfw i spent too much time in redpillwomen spaces and understand men too much to be able to mental pass now
at least my future bf will be happy i know when to keep my mouth shut and how to compliment him

>>41009811
thankfully my extreme malebrain dictates i can only be happy with men im attracted to

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I'm a cishet male and I'm mostly siding with the female perspective on this. It was a dumb thing to say to him but I totally get where she is coming from.


Guys... Am I.... Am I a transwoman?

I don't get why it's so bad since men say the same shit.

>>41009893
you're valid sis

>>41009904
the guy outed himself as betabux because noone else would be nearly so insecure about this

>>41009931
>because noone else would be nearly so insecure about this
Cope

>>41009931
>women admits she sees her bf as a backup
>it was the man's fault

>>41009952
deliberately misinterpreting what she meant is why you're a beta

>>41009904
While men have women they would hookup with but not marry, idk if they have women they would marry but not hookup with? Dunno I'm a misandrist anyway but from my understanding of men I don't see what reason they'd have for being willing to marry a woman but not hookup with her, unless they dislike hookups as a whole or romantically like her too much to handle a hookup well idk?

>>41009969
>stop listening to what I say or you're a loser

>>41009796
Why do you want to be someone's fuck toy and nothing else?

>>41009760
>youre not the kind of person i want a one night stand with, youre the kind of person i would want to marry
genuinely what is wrong with this as a compliment???

>>41009996
deliberately misinterpreting what I say is why you're a beta

>>41009999
nothing, low confidense people will just misinterpret it into thinking you mean they're some sort of back-up option which is really cringe.

>>41009999
redpill retard incels think she meant "I wouldn't fuck you as a one night stand, but I will marry you for money" instead of
"I see you as someone i love and want to spend my life with and not just as a one night stand"

>>41009760
im moidbrained af and i still side with wife on this one
the husband is insanely insecure

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>>41009969
>>41009999
>>41010025
>>41010030
>I would fuck chad and risk having an outside of wedlock baby with him but you're my backup option
Exact same thing as "you're ugly but you'd make a great mom". Nobody wants to be not lusted after. Women are retarded

>>41010043
you reek of insecurity

>>41010053
Buzzword buzzword buzzwords

>>41009760
cool i mentally pass what now

>>41010063
seethe moid

>>41010066
Ok hon

>>41009760
I really dont see any problem, why not wanting to just cum and dump would be a bad thing?

>>41010043
it's not an accident you're a incel when you're this much of an insecure beta
gain some self-awareness

>>41010087
Is all women know how to do is call people incels?

>>41010043
idk anon i prioritise marriage over one night stands, you rlly are just an insecure incel

>>41010043
>wife says she sees you more than just some person to have sex with
>immediately think about her getting railed by other men
ew go away cucky

>>41010106
>>41010108
Anyone who thinks the phrase "You're not someone I'd wanna hook up with" is a compliment, is a Moron.


She basically just said “I see you more as a stable provider than someone I am attracted to.” There’s really no other way to take that.

>>41010123
do you not have sex in marriage anon...?

>>41010123
>There’s really no other way to take that.
Their are since most of the people in the thread are seeing what she meant except for your pathetic little incel self

>>41009760
Is it bad if I imagined this as Zaush dialogue?

Bluepill is strong in this thread.

>>41010094
but you are one? I'm not passing judgement here
do you honestly think the OP in that reddit thread does not love her boyfriend?
it's clearly a communication problem with the boyfriend who's a little bit too insecure
I'm an insecure person but I know how to talk these things through with my partner
meanwhile you immediately transformed what you read into some redpill narrative that demonizes the girlfriend, bc you're self-inserting as the guy

>>41009760
Depressing that so many men barely seem to care about/understand romance.

This thread was made to reinforce transman disphoria by gaslighting the reader into thinking they should agree with the man when rhe issue is clearly his own insecurity. Remember, never kill yourself!

>>41009760
>you're good enough to marry
that makes no sense to see as an insult??
>>41010123
>i want to share my life with you

>>41010127
>>41010136
>>41010156
>>41010172
Do you ever wonder why dead bedrooms happen? Boyfriend is gonna be getting one pity handjob a year in 5 years.

>>41010165
Addendum: this probably doesn’t apply to that many men. Still kind of sad, but more so for them.

>>41009760
here is the translation for idiots:
"i don't want to fuck you. i want to make sweet tender love to you and be yours until the day one of us dies"

>>41009998
missing the point. it's not saying that he's marriage material that's bad, it's going out of your way to say that he's not fuckbuddy material while saying he is marriage material. it's like saying he's a "good provider" or something. why does it have to be mutually exclusive? why are the guys she would hook up with explicitly not the guys she would marry? it seems like a backhanded compliment, regardless of gender. like, if i were to say to my bf "you're the kind of guy i want to marry" i wouldn't at that the same time go out of my way to make SURE he knew i wouldn't fuck him outside the strictures of marriage

>>41010249
>love to you and be yours until the day one of us dies"
https://www.reddit.com/r/DeadBedrooms/

>>41010254
any fool can see that wasn't meant
clearly all she was saying is that she isn't treating him like a fuckbuddy he means more to her than that

>>41009760
Not ever trying to pass a fembrained, how is that an insult that cuts so deep you have to pause the relationship??

>>41009760
i think she misspoke and the thing she intended to say is actually fine
i don't think she intended to say "i wouldn't hook up with you", i think she intended to say "i wouldn't be satisfied by just hooking up with you"

>>41009760
I told my boyfriend he's cute and he punched me in the face reflexively

>>41010343
Yup, that's the problem. She thought she said "You're too good to just be a hookup" but what she actually said was "You're not physically attractive to me"

>>41010346
erm well you obviously meant that he's a piece of shit and you're only settling with him because he's rich so it was deserved actually

>>41010362
Thats what the op girl says

>>41010208
strange projection from an insecure person

>>41009999
When men play fuck marry kill the hottest one is the one that is fucked and the safer one is the one that gets married.

So it’s like telling a woman
>you’re not the hottest woman but I can certainly hold onto you and feel safe in our relationship because you aren’t hot enough to leave me for someone else

>>41010356
>what she actually said was "You're not physically attractive to me"
what she actually said was what she actually said
the rest is you misinterpreting
>>41010254
>why does it have to be mutually exclusive?
it doesn't, and it's not backhanded
>if i were to say to my bf "you're the kind of guy i want to marry"
but that's not what she meant to say exclusively, so it's not the same intended message
>i wouldn't at that the same time go out of my way to make SURE he knew i wouldn't fuck him outside the strictures of marriage
that's YOUR extrapolation
not what she said

>>41010277
more pathetic projection

>>41010430
You're so pressed lol

>>41010399
so is it all projection after all?
bc whenever girls play fmk, there's always a lot of in-group contention among themselves and rarely any consensus

>>41009904
She is low key calling him ugly and only appealing after she had fun. Its like saying "I never would have expected yo be attracted to someone like you" while thinking is cute because you love them regardless of their appearance.

>>41010442
Guys just want to be told they’re desired sexually because it’s so extremely rare unless you’re in the top 1%

>>41010423
sure. this guy seems really insecure and she's probably better off without him. but the phrasing of
>he is not someone who i would hookup or be fwb with but marry
leaves room for all these grammatical nuances and differences of interpretation. and i think that's probably intentional. i doubt this ever happened. more likely it was concocted to provoke conflict between highly gender-brained people, for views and so on

>>41009760
the idea that my partner male or female would hook up with a stranger is so gross I would dump them immediately

Women really are retarded and have no idea how to please their men huh. It's so easy too and they fail really basic steps like this one.

>>41009904
>I don't get why it's so bad since men say the same shit.
It's only offensive to an insecure male who thinks he's hot shit. To suddenly and abruptly be told "actually I like you because you're not hot shit" is the ultimate challenge to his ego.

A very similar thing happened to me with a crack whore. I was throwing a party thinking I was hot shit, she told me she thought I was "dope for a nerd". Shattered my ego into a million fucking pieces because she was just some fucking crack whore I had never met and that's the read she instantly got on me. I thought I had left my nerd ways behind for good, but here I was yet again.

>>41010043
Good bait but anyone who thinks like this will die alone, and DESERVES to.

>>41010477
>>41010477
maybe, who knows
maybe she's misquoting what she said, maybe she's just not very good with words
but one thing we can agree on:
>this guy seems really insecure and she's probably better off without him
I mean, why would he simply ask for time and retire instead of discussing it with her how her words hurt him and such...?
maybe that's asking too much of immature men

That one foid in here is really overusing her favorite word "insecure" today huh. Face it cupcake, you don't understand men for shit, and it shows.

>>41010514
Why

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>>41010517
> why would he simply ask for time and retire instead of discussing it with her how her words hurt him and such...?
oh my sweet summer child

>>41010517
this guy does sound like a loser. but with the cishets i've found it's normally 50/50. typical conversation with a particular female friend:
>"it's so annoying when he does [x]"
>"have you talked to him about [x]?"
>"...no."
>"do you think it would help to talk to him?"
>"well, like, i don't see why i should have to talk to him about it when we're married and we've been together for six years and i'm pregnant with his child. he should just know me well enough by now to KNOW that i hate [x] even if i've never told him i hate [x]"
i'm sure you know women like this. mosed cishets don't know how to have a relationship that doesn't include this kind of gender-based conflict

>>41009893
My take is the same as yours and I'm NB, so do with that what you will.

The factor here is having added a "guys she'd hook up or be fbw with" category to the phrase which may make the follow-up compliment a little off-putting for the partner because why would she think of you in contrast to someone else? I don't really think it is a gender thing because I've had female partners being this insecure with me too over mentioning them in contrast to other girls. Insecure people don't even want to get an implication that you're thinking about someone else other than them. I'm autistic so it was hard for me to understand but I guess I do now.

>>41009760
I'm a transbian and I cannot see anything wrong with this
It makes perfect sense as a compliment

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>>41009760
I’m a gay man and I would absolutely break up with my bf if he said this, holy fuck.

>I’d never have passionate, one-off sex with you
>Your body and personality just don’t excite me that way
>But you’re really stable and reliable
>Woah, why are you upset

Just repeal the 19th Amendment, because women are genuinely retarded if they can’t comprehend this.

>>41009760
If you have more than two working brain cells (a criterion I BARELY pass), you will understand what she meant with that statement

I'm convinced women really are more emotionally stunted than men if they can't see what's wrong with this

>>41010714
>I’d never have passionate, one-off sex with you
>Your body and personality just don’t excite me that way
>But you’re really stable and reliable
>Woah, why are you upset
This is why people keep callin you niggas insecure. You are reading things she didn't say fed by your own self image.

>>41009760
genuinely believe anybody who says they agree with the guy is just making it up

>>41010776
Nigga do you think she is hooking up with ugly dudes? Thats exactly what she's saying

>>41010782
you and everyone else here who says they dont get his position are just larping because the OP framed it as malebrained

>>41009760
>women unable to comprehend
>think she said something wrong, you are mentally a dude
>I realized how he understood it
>All my friends tell me I messed it up

>>41010791
>Nigga do you think she is hooking up with ugly dudes?
Nigga do you think shes MARRYING an ugly dude?
>Thats exactly what she's saying
The emotionally secure way to read what she's saying is "we could only have passionate one off sex, but I want to have passionate sex for the rest of my life only with you".

>>41009760
If a woman told me that I'd probably try to knock her up asap so I guess I am a tranny but still male brained enough to want to impregnate women in into

>>41010823
This is making a massive assumption. He's gonna be getting a pity handjob for his birthday every year or starfish sex, not the hookup treatment LMAOOO

>>41010791
The insecure part is reading
>I’d never have passionate, one-off sex with you
>Your body and personality just don’t excite me that way
Where it was not stated.

>>41010849
I'm sorry you don't have basic literacy skills and can't read between the lines

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>>41010776
>>41010823
>>41010849


Here are her own words, verbatim:
>he is not someone I would hook up or be a fwb with
>he is not someone I would hook up or be a fwb with
>he is not someone I would hook up or be a fwb with

You’re just incorrect. They could not, in fact, have one-off sex according to her own goddamn words you disingenuous cunt. Here is a screenshot of a woman in the thread btw. Is she an insecure incel too? Or is that only when men read it that way?

>>41009760
I don’t really see what the big deal is desu I would be way more insulted if someone said the opposite to me

>>41010857
You are hallucinating between the lines.

>>41010873
If i told you id never normally have sex with you but id marry you id sure you'd take it well

>>41010858
>Is she an insecure incel too?
Yes. At least she was, as per her own story (she was a teen, inexperienced, and like teens usually are, insecure.)
Hope that clears things up for you.

>>41010881
She said it stings now too, but go off retard. Didn’t address my main point either. I know thinking is hard for you girlz!

>>41010878
>id never normally have sex with you
Not what she said no matter how many times you repeat it, retard.

>>41010892
>id never hookup with you
Tell me how to interpret this

>>41010858
>They could not, in fact, have one-off sex according to her own goddamn words you disingenuous cunt
You said they could not have "passionate sex" and that his body/personality "does not excite her. That is STILL not stated in the text you linked. Saying you don't see someone as a one night stand is not the same thing as saying you don't find them sexually attractive.

>Is she an insecure incel too?
Yes she is insecure as well. Whether or not she's an incel? Not enough information.

>>41010878
>If i told you id never normally have sex with you
That's not what was said.

>>41010907
>I don't just want to hook up with you
Is the emotionally secure way to read it.

>>41010891
>>41010891
Did I stutter? If still stings, she is still insecure. Moreover, it's not like I called the redditor's boyfriend an incel, so the comparison is not apt. You're the insecure incel. The boyfriend is just insecure. Is that more clear for you now?

>>41010924
>i wouldn't have a hookup (ie casual sex because I find you hot) with you
Keep twisting your brain into pretzels to interpret this differently

>>41010943
There are no pretzels necessary anon. What OP said is extremely easy to interpret for an emotionally secure man.

>>41010941
>if you dont roll with the punches of shit I say you're insecure

>>41010960
>if you read negative intent where it was not intended you are insecure
FTFY

>>41010957
Emotionally secure = whipped. Men don't want to be your safe option sweetie.

>>41010966
>Emotionally secure = not jumping to negative conclusions because you expect the worst
FTFY
>Men don't want to be your safe option sweetie.
I am a cismale.

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>>41010892
>>41010924
>>41010942

>he is not someone I would hook up or be a fwb with
These are her words. She wrote them. In that exact order. And they mean exactly what we’re claiming. You are the one reading extra words in, like “just” or “merely,” when she didn’t use them, even in her own retelling.

>calling me an incel
I’m a gay slut, get the fuck out of here with that. It’s so nauseatingly transparent that your go-to insult for any man who dares to disagree with you is that he can’t access sex.

Congratulations on passing, I guess. Your IQ is definitely low enough to be a cis foid. Every day I am thankful I get to live a life without women in my home.

>>41010966
See
>>41010964

There's a reason most men find this insulting

>>41010907
There's many things she could've meant, but what I would immediately assume is something like
>You're not the kind of person I'd want to mar the chances of having a meaningful connection with by engaging in an act that is fundamentally transactional and ephemeral.
That's what I personally would imagine myself meaning to say if I were to pick her words as my message. Maybe she meant something different, but it's still probably along these lines, I'd guess.
The core of the discussion ITT is not necessarily EXACTLY what she meant, but what the boyfriend immediately assumed and how bad he took it.

>>41010990
Very very charitable interpretation

>>41009760
>by saying he is not someone who I would hookup or be a fwb with but marry
Genuinely having trouble parsing this.
Is it "You're not someone who I would hook up with but I'd marry you"? Or "You're not someone who I'd hookup with and then marry"? Or "You're someone who I'd hook up with but not marry"? I'm guessing it's the first based on how everyone is answering, but it's not obvious to me.

>>41010982
>And they mean exactly what we’re claiming
No, they don't mean what you are claiming but I do believe that you cannot be shown what they actually mean.

>I’m a gay slut
Yes, I was not the one that called you an incel. I think you are actually sadder than that, you have no idea what a loving connection actually looks like. You confuse momentary lust for anything meaningful which is why you place so much value on hookups.

>Congratulations on passing, I guess
Still neither trans nor ciswoman.

>>41010982
>I’m a gay slut
I was the one who called you an incel. There's someone ITT literally using the term "blue pill", so I thought you were one of them. My bad. But all the same, my points are unchanged.

>>41010990
It's not like this is complicated, insult him if you want but her wording really was poor and it's easy to see how a guy could interpret this depending on which part is stressed.
>not someone who I would hookup or be a fwb
He can take this to mean she doesn't find him attractive, even if her intent is "You're not trashy." Or, he can take this to mean "I'm am or have been a huge slut and fucked a lot of guys in such a situation" which instantly devalues a woman in a guy's eyes because it means she's cheap and unreliable (can't be trusted to be faithful, so paternity will be in question.) Guys are evolved to be instinctively extremely wary of women like this because until very recently they had to take the paternity of children completely on faith in the woman's character.

What this thread actually proves is that trans women are not like cis women. They are superior beings honed by years of lonely suffering into truly loyal hearts.


They are PURE, they dont have the same lifelong arrogance or instincts for materiel / genetic parasitism. They only see love, they are the most angelic people i have ever seen.

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>>41011022
>>41011048

>he is not someone I would hook up with

>I would not hook up with him

>hooking up with him is not something I would do

>a hook up is what I would not do with him

This is…a compliment. Yes. Very good. I give up.

>>41011050
>her wording really was poor
Sure, but she could be misquoting herself.
>it's easy to see how a guy could interpret
I agree. But that's also the problem. Why did he interpret it that way and why did he take it so poorly?
>she doesn't find him attractive
>I have been a huge slut
See, this I cannot comprehend. How can you be in a relationship with someone and not know that they find you attractive, and also not know whether they've been huge sluts? That's a whole nother issue and it's totally unrelated. The problem is the guy taking a romantic message for a personal insult, then skedaddling out of her vicinity to think things over without trying direct communication via talking over feelings and clearing up confusion.

>>41011114
>can you be in a relationship with someone and not know that they find you attractive
Because women shack up with dudes for benefits all the time

>>41011114
>How can you be in a relationship with someone and not know that they find you attractive, and also not know whether they've been huge sluts?
That's impossible to determine without knowing these two and their relationship better. And as someone else pointed out, it's actually very common for couples to refuse to communicate across gender lines because our culture teaches them both they don't have to or shouldn't for some insane reason.

>>41011081
Let me simplify for you, since you're not very good with words: hook up is le bad.
Of course, it's not that simple, but now do you see the point?

>>41011114
>>41011129
"Guys should just get it" and "Women wouldn't understand" and all those cliche lines.

>>41011128
>>41011129
I never had that problem. Sucks to suck. But then again, the boyfriend is clearly nor a fan of open communication about personal feelings, so how he possibly know whether his own gf finds him attractive or whether she's been a complete slut (does this not sound ridiculous to you btw??)

>>41011197
>not a fan
>how could he possibly know
Fixed
I need to sleep @_@

>>41011143
I feel so bad for the guys she had passionate, one-off sex with now. That must have been so traumatizing and sad for them. Thank you for your patience in explaining. I hope those poor men she fucked get therapy, god, I’m tearing up just thinking about it. So much unnecessary suffering…if only I had known…

>>41011197
Happy for you, but notice how I'm talking about generalities and not any specific or ideal relationship.

>>41011081
>he is not someone I would hook up with but marry
FTFY

You can interpret that largely two ways :
>you are unattractive but I want to marry you for money/stability/whatever
or
>you have everything I would want in a hook up and more because you are marriage material

The former is a conclusion that an insecure man would arrive at, the latter is the conclusion an emotionally secure man would arrive at. This is also all

>>41011207
It's bad bc they couldn't marry, not bc the hookup was traumatizing. That's why it's supposed to be a compliment. Because marrying is nice and the best, and she would marry him, and having had a hook up would've gotten in the way of that. But go on being disingenous, the baiting must go on.

>>41010435
woah no way, more projection lol

>>41011235
>This is also all
dependent on her accurate recollection of statements she made while drunk

(hit post too early kek)

>>41011230
>ideal relationship
Communication is the basis of every relationship, not just one or another, not just an ideal one. I'll reiterate: not knowing what your partner are or feels about you is a completely separate and much deeper issue than merely misinterpreting a particular message.

That’s pretty fucking bad. Idk if that’s relationship ending but it is pretty close

>>41009760
I'm mentally with her because I totally get it, but she's also a dummy for saying that out loud in that way. People need to learn how to compliment without adding extra words to it.
>You're pretty good for a girl
>You're hot for a black guy
>Not bad for a kid
Those extra words are dismissive and inflammatory.

>>41009999
I think most men want to be the one you’d hook up with but also the one you’d wanna marry. Being just the second feels like you’re not wanted for your body

Women say this shit and then expect you to walk on eggshells 24/7

>i want to eternally devote myself to you
>"NOOOOOOOO WHAT DO YOU MEAN IM NOT A SEXY CHAD MEME WHO PUMPS AND DUMPS WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY"

>>41010156
As a man if my GF told that to me I’d be crushed. You don’t have to get it but it’s like I’m being told I’m only good for how I can make you feel you’re not sexually attracted to me

>>41011292
>>i want to eternally devote myself to you
"I want your resources"

>>41011237
>It’s bad bc they couldn’t marry
Oh right, I forgot about that rule that once you hook up with someone you have to banish them from this plane of existence forever.

Would it shock you to learn that my bf and I met by…ding ding ding hooking up? But now we have been dating for over a year because we ALSO see each other as marriage material. Imagine that, wowwweeee zowwweeeee.

It’s unbelievably depressing to imagine not being hookup material to your own wife. Legitimately just kys at that point (or better yet her!).

>>41011302
bitch made male

>>41011307
Bitch-made = under 6' tall lol

>>41009811
before I transitioned I had a girl tell me almost the same thing but we weren't dating, she wanted to date me. she had already had a kid with somebody and I wasn't interested.

>>41011307
Sorry people have woken up to your tricks lady

>>41009760
I understand why the guy took that as an insult ,but thats on him
Marriage is MANY steps higher ,in terms of relationship ,than a hookup

>>41010249
It really is interesting how different the perceptive here is. I’m not denying how you see things but that’s not how I read it at all. I can’t take it any way but not being sexually interested.

I WANT the rough fuck you sex. We can do the cuddle bonding after. Depriving me of that in a relationship is not fulfilling my sexual needs. I don’t wanna have to caress my partner and treat her like she’s some delicate flower, I wanna fuck like rabbits. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you and wanna provide for you as well but acting as if those are seperate things and for seperate people is incredibly emasculating

>>41011314
>>41011316
you fags lower the white birth rate by failing to be MEN

>>41010300
That wasn’t how I read it at all. It wasn’t a “more than that” situation it was a “instead of that” situation. For many women the marriage and love partner is more valuable, for many men such as myself those two aspects are equally important and you can’t have one without the other

>>41011327
It's easier to get a job than a loyal woman these days lol

>>41011327
>not settling for starfish sex once every blue moon and paying for her existence is bad

>>41010343
If she had said this instead that would’ve made all the difference but I don’t think this is as simple as a slip of words. I think those are DEEPLY separated statements and she herself didn’t realize that gap. The BF did and is rightfully hurt

>>41011306
You gotta be baiting
Yes, dumbass, hooking up is not a bad thing in and out itself, but also that's not what I said
I've tried explaining to you where she's coming from, assuming she had good intentions with what she said (we have no reason to believe she meant ill)
I don't know what else to tell you
I'm tired, boss

>>41009760
no it's an ultimate test if you have the brain cells to rub together to ask for clarification before chimping out. "do you mean that i am not attractive to you, or that instead of a one time deal you want to have sweaty lustful monogomous sex every night of our lives forever?" use your own words of course, but come on fellas how wound up do you gotta be? yeesh.

>>41011392
Why would she admit that?

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>>41009760
it's easy to understand the situation from both sides if you're not at room temperature IQ, this is not a gender thing
neither person is truly in the wrong here

she meant well, but worded her compliment poorly
his interpretation was obviously wrong in hindsight, however his reaction wasn't our of line or crazy
thinking your gf is telling you that you're too ugly to have casual sex with will screw with your head

it's just an unfortunate fuck up all around

>>41009760
I'm 1000% just naive but like idk I'd see that as just liking them more than just some casual thing and not wanting to like lose then and take things seriously. Like idk i would just put married directly above some hook up thing not like better for romance but worse at sex or whatever the fuck cuz like surely you'd want to marry someone hot and shit too?

>>41011364
>he is not someone I would hook up with
>but [I would] marry
Wheras I would hook up with AND marry my bf. Do you seriously not see why that’s better?

>>41011416
lets not complicate things with your inability to parse honesty and falsehoods or to ask additional leading questions and voice further concerns. let's just stick to the base premise for now okay timmy!

>>41011423
>this is not a gender thing
it is, to the extent that men can't speak up their feelings and communicate things through straigthforwardly with their partner
not telling who's to blame, but it is what it is

>>41011463
no one fucking can except for highly educated, well traveled individuals with just enough of a spicy life to develop empathy and communication skills. so like fucking me and no one else i've ever fucking met of any race or gender. fuck off.

>>41011463
There’s an update to the post where she says he came back and wants to go to couples therapy to work it out, fwiw

So, did some research: that Reddit account that made this was banned. Idk if it was a troll or not but that was from a year ago. I can’t even tell if the replies here are in good faith or not. I cannot imagine a human being not taking the man’s side here. I just don’t understand. You guys have to be trolling

>>41011463
thats a weird take to me because this situation happened owing to a woman not communicating her feelings properly

>>41011459
Insulting me doesnt change the point of why would a woman admit she is with a man for stability rather than liking him? How does she win in that situation? lmao

>>41011498
i can't imagine not seeing everyone as equally retarded and overly emotional. additionally almost entirely incapable of not jumping to conclusions nor being patient enough or in control enough of their baby tears to seek clarification. but yes probably made up story anyways just to get people mad online.

>>41011516
define winning in your imagined scenario, and also explain why you see relationships as an inherently competitive or antagonist.

The “femanon” here HAS to be a troll larping right? I am at a loss for words when it comes to her lack of empathy here

>>41011539
Winning would be continuing the relationship where she is able to live with his resources

>>41011520
That would make me feel better. There’s no way people are that stupid. It has to be bait. I wanna have faith in men and women to have healthy loving relationships together where we can want each other for body AND mind

>>41011341
if you actually knew any women you'd know we love sex too especially with a man we love

>>41011545
why do you link women with a given result of mooching? also explain why you see relationships as inherently competitive or antagonistic.

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>>41011550
Not going to happen unless youre henry cavill or something
If youre marrying after 30 this will be your situation because she can't fuck around anymore

>>41011451
I see it. I'm really sleepy. Idk what she meant exactly, but the issue is the lack of communication, and the way the bf reacted (bc really there's no way to gleam from what she claimed she said she doesn't like her bf sexually or doesn't find him attractive)
I think it's useless for us to go on bc we'd need more info on what she actually said on that fateful day and what she truly meant
Sry for any typos
Gn, nona

>>41011561
Its not mooching so much as wanting stability because she can't ride the cock carousel anymore and needs to settle down. This is why the dead bedrooms epidemic is crazy with millenials especially

>>41011498
>I cannot imagine a human being not taking the man’s side here
Then read the replies and try harder. Maybe you learn something.

>>41011564
See, fuck you too man. I’m tired of this negativity from both sides. I’d rather be single than have someone settle for me and I wanna love a woman with my whole heart and my massive penis. And fuck you, I DO look good

>>41011575
i double dog dare you to effectively measure how often people are fucking, historically over multiple generations, in an amount of detail and a way that you can infer real causation. whatever stupid fucking research university survey data you're reaching for right now probably is shit btw.

>>41011590
I'm not saying you are bad looking or a bad person but ever since dating apps went online like skynet you are competing with the local henry cavill rather than maybe chad from your town

>>41011482
>no one fucking can
>>41011515
>owing to a woman not communicating her feelings properly
My point still stands
If one can't do it alone, then maybe cooperating like you should in a relationship works better

>>41011558
I’m the dumbass anon whose only relationships have been sex first, date after (I am not trolling)

I get really nervous and have poor social skills so unless we hook up first I have trouble bridging the gap from acuantince to partner.

This has worked for me to varying degrees for a decade so when I hear a woman say “I wouldn’t hook up with you” that is the same as a rejection

>>41011597
No idea what youre trying to say but if its that people arent having more casual sex than ever before youre retarded

>>41011607
Agreed. I got off apps. I had fun with early days back in mid 2010s but they’re terrible now

>>41011607
do you think women enjoy digging through piles of retards who can't represent themselves well online either (not that anyone can because you have to be a pro marketer/pr person)? they have to be strung along to be kept on the platform and generating engagement just like the rest of us. everyone is starting to drop that shit because these apps are not made to work and get people together effectively.

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>>41011616
NTA but factually incorrect

>>41011613
yeah i'm also hypersexual but by the time i'm saying you're more than a hook up all that has already happened

>>41011250
The point was that this issue is common.

Holy shit i am so thankful to be gay.

>>41011616
i double dog dare you to prove that in a convincing way. do you think in the past ten years we've suddenly become better at gathering sample data about sexual activity? that people have become more honest or open about answering research data? or are you just inferring from your anecdotal experience? i think it is you who is the retard!

>>41011635
So then why did you think the BF was in the wrong here? I’m assuming you also really value physical intimacy. Hearing that my SO didn’t wanna hook up with me would be soul crushing

>>41011642
now you know why married bi men need gay men on the side to comfort them every now and then

>>41011642
everytime one of my gay or trans friends say "desu cis dating does seem pretty shit now" and the implied ending to the thought is "you should try being gay!" i want to fucking headbutt all of you. keep that stupid fucking thought to yourself.

>>41009760
I must be no gender because I have no idea what she is even trying to say due to her terrible communication skills.

>>41011665
Why are you here?

>>41011659
because they're obviously in a relationship already and she expressed that he's important to her
she doesn't say but i presume they are or were having sex regularly too and he's a fool if he interpreted this to mean she doesn't want to continue that

>>41011675
i was mashing refresh on the frontpage until i saw something sufficiently retarded to go aggravate myself at.

>>41009760
so she said
> i'm not really attracted to you
but was trying to say
> you're not someone i can just throw away after having sex with you
i guess?
>>41009893
i'm a tranny and think what she said is retarded
so...

>>41011671
she’s trying to say “you are someone i’d like to spend my life with”. he’s interpreting it as “i am not attracted to you enough to want to fuck you just because of how hot you are”

>>41011682
You’ve been communicating in good faith so far and I appreciate that. You’re a cis femanon? As a bi/straightish dude who is already self conscious about my body you have to understand why I and other men like me would relate with the bf and fear the woman is only having sex because she wants me as a partner, not because of enjoyment of the sex itself or lust towards me and my physical appearance. It makes the relationship feel transactional and no healthy relationship can be built on that

>>41011564
This is where the gap lies, romanticizing the "change" in preference as "maturing" vs seeing that she is settling for what's realistic.
>"I want to have a family at some point and the types of guys I have hooked up with so far are not reliable"
>"I can't find a guy that is both attractive and reliable so I will have to compromise"

>"I'm happy you don't have the problems of the guys I dated so far but ideally I want someone who is more attractive than you while not having those problems"
this is probably the closest to what she really meant, wanting to express that positive feeling of finding someone reliable and how happy she is about that despite having to settle.

But if you are the male partner who also has romantic delusions about the relationship this "having to settle" breaks the narrative as you are no longer 2 people who finally found someone to spend their lives with but put on a scale with other guys who all have pros and cons and different attainability.

They could have avoided this by being more up front about the true nature of their relationship but in the end people want their romance and ego so it can't be helped.

>>41011736
if they weren't in a relationship then yeah but taken in full context i don't see how anything other than the first meaning could be meant
going back to >>41010254
>why are the guys she would hook up with explicitly not the guys she would marry?
it seems to me that it's the men who've created this dichotomy

>>41011745
straight (and post op if it matters and it probably does) mtf
i understand your concern i guess i just don't see where she said she doesn't like having sex with him

>>41011798
>i want someone more attractive than you
uh where does she say this? she says she could see herself marrying him. obviously they're having and will keep having sex. she just said she doesn't want to throw him away.

>>41009760
>and if you think she said nothing wrong, you are mentally retarded
I know I didn't really change what you said, but I fixed it anyway

>>41011736
>she’s trying to say “you are someone i’d like to spend my life with”.
Maybe she should've tried saying it in a less retarded and roundabout way

>>41011830
>obviously they’re having and will keep having sex
This isn’t the 1950s, you understand your wife can just stop having sex with you, right?

>>41011451
Ladies, if this doesn’t get you to understand then idk what to say

>>41011830
Thanks for being honest. Not that your opinion here isn’t relavent but I do think you have a different perspective as a trans woman. Apologies in advance if any of the following is offense I truly don’t mean it to be: you are biologically incapable of having kids now. When you choose a partner you are not choosing them based on their ability to be a good biological match with you when it comes to having kids. You are with them becuase you love THEM. That’s almost purer love than a cis het relationship to an extent as there truly is no ulterior motive even possible: you love them for them and want to be with them. Of course you’d see it as them wanting to have sex (or at least I hope) I imagaine that as we discussed is a crucial part of love to you.

As a man, when I read this woman’s words verbatim I hear the following: “you are the exact kind of man I want to settle down with and start a family together with. You are not the kind of man I want for sex.”

It’s not explicitly saying she DOESN’T want sex with her BF but that attraction isn’t even necessary for her. That is not why she’s with him!

For many, not all, cis het women this is exactly what they want: a stable and loving partner whom they can depend on and start a family with. They may enjoy sex but for them that attraction is not the end goal and often times isn’t even necessary.

That is not true for many cis het men. I will speak for myself. I NEED both the emotional connection and the physical one. It sounds like that was what the BF wanted as well. There is an inherent mismatch here where they obviously bond on the emotional front but the BF sees her as a sexual object (not only as an object!) and the GF by her own admission does not feel the same.

As soon as you realize this you should agree the relationship is bound to fail. If not I predict an unfulfilling marriage for the man where his wife fulfils his sexual needs out of obligation instead of desire.

>>41011830
It's implied when she says unlike him theres other guys she would hook up with, and of course she wish he was as attractive as those guys, but she can't have her cake and eat it too, therefore I used the word ideally, but if the guy had a different idea about the relationship even that is a big offense.

Let me be clear that I don't think she is expressing intent to go find someone like that, the important thing she wanted to express was the positive feeling of him being marriage material which is why she was so confused, but it's because that in trying to express how positive that is she lets slip that he is marriage material DESPITE not being fuck material.

>>41011947
i hope you'd have said the same thing if i had said i was cis and known to be infertile
>You are not the kind of man I want for sex
I just don't see that in her words given the complete context
>For many, not all, cis het women this is exactly what they want: a stable and loving partner whom they can depend on and start a family with. They may enjoy sex but for them that attraction is not the end goal and often times isn’t even necessary.
although I won't have children I promise I'm also after a stable and loving partner I can spend the rest of my life with, so I'm not sure that end is as different as you claim
I also very much enjoy sex (and all the women i know feel the same) and wouldn't want to be spending my life with a guy i have no desire to have sex with

>>41009760
that's such a nice compliment from her, it's like she said ur not the type of guy I wanna fuck to forget about my shitty night because nor you are the asshole douchy who exhumes charming big d will make me squirt and then make me regret my whole life, but you are the one I wanna spend the rest of life with because I love you. Anyone understanding anything else than that is filled with insecurity, there's not even ounce of fembrain vs malebrain in this.

>>41011998
where does she say any of that???
we don't actually have her original words just what she wrote on reddit
>he is not someone who i would hookup or be a fwb with
yes i admit does literally mean what you claim but they're also in a relationship presumably having sex and with complete context i just don't see how you can interpret it to mean she doesn't find him attractive. she's clearly expressing that she loves him.

>>41012010
kek

>>41011830
People mean more than they say, that's one of the things about social interaction everyone knows.

>>41012010
>ur not the type of guy I wanna fuck to forget about my shitty night
yes I'm sure that's why they are fucking, genious poster right here.

>>41011630
Thats just because there are more incels
The ones the are having sex are having far more partners

>>41012044
yes which is why interpreting this as "i don't want to have sex with you" is silly

>>41012046
>go out with bf for 2.5 years
>tell him I would marry him (because I love him)
>boyfriend sad
I don't get it, what's wrong here ?

>>41012058
No, it's why he is capable of interpreting this as "I don't find you attractive but think you make a good partner." He presumes the first part based on her statement (as he interprets it) that she wouldn't hook up with him. That presumption could be wrong, but the point here is that even if it's a miscommunication, we can't pretend it's not possible there's implications to her statement beyond the mere words because everybody loads statements up with implications.

>>41012070
Youre not physically attractive for me to fuck you without incentives

>>41012002
I won’t lie to you: I wouldn’t. I am by no means transphobic (I hope) but I do believe that there are hormonal differences between cis and trans women. Is that transphobic? I’m not saying you’re not a woman I AM saying that MRIs even show differences between cis and trans women and trans women post HRT. The further along with HRT they are the closer their brains come to CIS ones under MRIs.


I’m likely digging a bigger whole for myself and am gonna be called a bigot or you’ll just leave cause you’re hurt. I’m sorry, genuinely not my intention.

As for the last point: you really don’t see a difference there? Asking with 0 judgment. I don’t mean between cis and trans women here, I mean between men and women in general.

It’s probably coming off obviously from my writing but I’m ex redpill so feel free to call me on my bullshit if you think I’ve gone too far into the Manosphere with what I’m saying.


I guess for me seeing is believing: you truly think in your heart of hearts that women want to make sex just as much of a priority as men do and that they also want the “fuck hard love hard” style relationships?

>>41012025
>yes i admit does literally mean what you claim
>just don't see how you can interpret it to mean she doesn't find him attractive
????

>>41012047
Get your red pill nonsense out of here anon. Touch grass

>>41012087
ommmg that's such a beta thought, complete turnoff, the story didnt even mention anything about the bf being loaded or anything.

>>41012025
Love =/= sexual attractive, ask any asexual.

>>41012110
honestly, if they arent fucking after 2 years, then the guy needs to ditch that bitch

>>41011736
That can't be what happened because nowhere in the post does it say he misunderstood her. She's only saying he didn't take her compliment as a compliment. Unless she's communicating that badly as well?

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>>41012107
Your insults dont work here you wench

>>41012089
>brain scans
you realize these things are statistical right?
do i have female height at 5'5"? am i doomed to be inbetween regardless due to my origins?
>As for the last point: you really don’t see a difference there?
we agree that women want a stable and loving partner? are you suggesting men do not and only care if she's hot? in a couple decades both will grow old, but i'd hope they can still be in love.
>you truly think in your heart of hearts that women want to make sex just as much of a priority as men do
idk what you mean. i like sex and so do all the women i've spoken intimately too about it. i consider sharing my body with a man to be a very important part of a relationship.

>>41012134
>girlfriend says I love you, I wanna marry you not be fwb
>omg, she only fucks with me because she gets "incentives"

wtf is that thought do you realize how it doesn't make sense, she basically offered the rest of her life (and intimacy) to you, and the only answer you got is that... huge turnoff and that shows massive insecurity

>>41012197
>I couldn't get the hot guys to settle with me so I chose you

>>41012154
>I consider sharing my body with a man a very important part of the relationship
I am glad to hear that femanon. I wish you nothing but love and happiness. I still am not necessarily convinced that your opinion is the majority one but I hope to also find a woman in my life who wants me for body in mind. GN

>>41012222
the boyfriend is the hot guy in that situation, he's the one bagging her for LIFE.

sometimes guys are just snack, you're just hungry it feels good for a brief moment, she's openly saying she wants HIM FOR THE REST OF LIFE, THATS THE HIGHEST FORM OF COMPLIMENT.

the guy is just a bitch

>>41012271
maybe men see marriage as settling when we see it the way you've described
would explain a lot

>>41012271
I wouldn’t take it that way as a guy. All she had to say instead was “you’re not the kinda guy I’d wanna hook up with or be FWB. I’d fall for you too hard. The sex would be too amazing and your personality is so great. No matter what I’d just fall in love. You’re a keeper!”

>>41012087
It does not have to be about betabux. It just means that either there was problems with the more attractive guys(bad personality, drugs, cheats, breaks promises, violent, literally anything) she hooked up with, or if there were no problems she was unable to lock them down in a relationship. (perhaps she even liked their personality MORE than her current partner).

You are also focusing too much on looks when personality is also a factor in why she might hook up with them over her current boyfriend who may be boring in comparison.

so it's more like:
>You are not attractive for me to fuck you but I like you for all the other reasons and will settle for(or tolerate) sex with you.

This isn't really wrong but people will enter relationships with more ideal romantic expectations, not so much that the guy thought he was giga chad but that he was caught up in the romantic ideal constantly repeated in culture where 2 people find each other and fall in love and comparing them with their previous partners shouldn't even be part of that narrative.

>>41012305
It’s only settling if we feel like we’re being settled for. It’s all about the phrasing. If you frame it like “I love yo6 so damn much I wanna fuck you exclusively for the rest of my life, fall even deeper in love, start a family experience everything together. I WANT YOU” that goes over a lot better than “I wanna settle, rely on you to pay the mortage and have a sexless uneventful life where we grow old and boring and die”

>>41012316
If that's the case id rather die alone I guess I just wanna be loved man

>You know you are really fat and ugly in comparison to the hot girls I dated before but they were boring, I would rather spend my life with you.

The difference here is that fat girls might be self aware and have low self worth and might still be happy while the bf would think of himself as a normal person who suddenly got lowered to "the guy girls don't want to hook up with"

But either way saying the quiet part out loud is a bad idea, if must do so from the beginning.

>>41012271
A guy doesn't see it as a gift to support you, he wants you to see him as hot and someone satisfying a need, not just someone giving you money.

>>41012420
maybe she makes more than him, and SHE will be supporting him

>>41012430
Lol

>>41012365
I mean they can still love you, it's more whether you can handle the context of everything they had to give up on before they even got to the point of considering letting themselves love you. I suppose also the risk that you aren't the final guy she is comparing but just another one she will abandon "loving" if he isn't good enough.

>>41009760
so what's offensive about this? it implies she's going to cheat on you? alpha sux, beta bux?

>>41012593
It is implied that for her, desire was stronger for other men. And the logical conclusion of the question "why aren't you with other men?" then, is that she settled.

There, 230 posts of discussion condensed into one.

>>41009999
Idk, I'm a trans woman but I can understand where guys are coming from, it sounds like she doesn't find you sexually appealing and doesn't like your body all that much.

>>41012271
>>41012305
This seems to be based on a high ego view that women are amazing so it's a great privilige to be chosen to marry them, and that they are spoiled for choice so if chosen by them it means the chosen man was the BEST ONE and he should be proud of that.

In reality most women like men are flawed people both in looks and on the inside and despite how desperate some men might seem men also don't put up with just anything. So if a guy wants to be with a woman who also has lots of flaws, knowing that woman loves you and is attracted to you goes a long way while anything that might indicate that she settled and wants more will break that romance.
The real choices women have are also far more limited, lots of men they date will have problems and the ones that don't will often be unattractive or out of reach, in the end you have to realize you can't look for the perfect partner forever and settle for the current one. Marriage doesn't have to mean you were the best one it can also mean you were the first tolerable one she was able to keep.

Of course the women like the men love to romantice their situation, so of course they prefer the original framing but if they are deluding themselves theres always a risk the truth will slip out like might have happened in the op, which has the hilarious out come of breaking the guy's delusion.

>>41012612
Where are you getting that implication from? Call me fembrained if you like, I just don't get it

Is this whole thing really just husband material = ugly or something?

>>41012714
I would say "unattractive" to catch any kind of attraction but even more importantly in this context husband material means "attainable"

Normally chad would be called husband material if he was committed, reliable, responsible, high income, good with kids etc but when she compares with the hook ups it implies she had to sacrifice attraction for these things since she couldn't get better.

It's miles away from
>"YOU WON YOU ARE BETTER THAN ALL THOSE GUYS I HOOKED UP WITH I CHOOSE YOU FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE"
When it's really more a complaint that those hookups lacked the basics to be husband material than a compliment of you.

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>>41009760
>"you're marriage material not a loser fuckboy"
>waaaaah i'm so le sad

>>41012939
>marriage material
Betabuxx material

>>41012947
you will never have true love or get married because you think like that

>>41013027
NTA but I’d rather stay single than marry a women who doesn’t wanna fuck me

>>41013112
she does want to fuck him though. she wants to fuck him for ever

>>41013124
You're being deliberately dense here.

>>41013129
no, you're just making things up she didn't say or even imply

>>41013027
if he doesn't marry a virgin then she'll know he has a smol pp

>>41013146
She literally said point blank "not someone I would hook up or be fwb with". Where does that put you in a scale of desire, compared to those she "would"?

>>41013124
That is not what most marriages entail femanon. I think you’re speaking in ill faith. The vast majority of marriages are sexless by 50

>>41013226
and most people aren't hooking up by 50. so what?

>>41009760
Am I a chick? This would be fucking awesome to hear and make me a lot more comfortable in my own skin

Empathy my ass. You have to have incel brainworms to not think that was a compliment.

>>41013278
I’m tired anon. It’s 1:30 anon. I just want a woman who wants to fuck me that’s all

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>>41009760
she said nothing wrong but she lacks tact and he's insecure

https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/s/q1kt9yX84i

Sad end

>>41013414
this, lots of them in this thread

>>41009760
>>41009904

I don't care what anyone says.
I think it's distasteful even when guys say "wife material vs pump and dump" I've seen that one a lot more times.

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>>41009760
https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/1bbfu4z/starter_wife_women_you_practice_on_pump_and_dump/

Well? What now?

>>41013172
Why do most women insults come back to small penis, youre an incel, etc

>>41013995
Don't think a woman posted that

>>41013876
Do people really do any of that stuff though?
Who the fuck has ever heard of a "starter wife"? You know divorce often doesn't go very well for men?
If people are saying stuff like that, it's bravado(men say a lot of stupid shit to each other that they don't really mean). I don't think they're putting it into practice.

>>41009760
This is funny to me as an ace person because not only do I not see anything wrong with what she said, I actually see it as a high compliment. I would be over the moon if someone said this to me, because it would affirm and reassure me that they like me for the part of me that I most identify with as my “self”, my persona, my psyche. Sexual attraction is cheap, it’s not even the best form of physical attractiveness. I’d much rather be considered “beautiful” than “sexy” or “hot”, but I was never all that fond of having to animate a body anyways. So for someone to say to me “yeah, you have no sex appeal but I like your personality so much that I want to spend the rest of my life with you” is for them to truly “get” me and love me in precisely the way I want to be loved.

>>41014465
>twisting shit so much you're hallucinating her calling him beautiful
insane

>>41014465
>yeah you have no sex appeal but I want to spend my life with you
I totally understand why this works for an asexual but I would literally kill myself if I found out my spouse felt this way.

>>41015258
>you have no sex appeal
she didn't say that THOUGH

>>41015274
I was quoting the ace person, sorry

>>41009796
How? Would you not want to be seen as relationship material and not just something that can be tossed away after a night. Are you stupid?

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>>41009796
Literally how

>>41009811
So if you want to spend rest of your life with a girl you are settling for her? The best girls are for one night only? Moid brain moment you are having here

>>41009796
the fuck? "devastating" for a man, but not woman sonehow? how could it be an insult? perhaps some people are into stuff like free love and likes... but thats not insult, get a brian morans.
>>41010123
she said hes something more than guy fuck with. you have autism or what? cannot imagine things from someone else perspective??
>>41011235
yep

>>41009998
yes :3

>>41010519
Men are irrational and make scenarios in their head to get mad about it seems :D

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>>41009760
After reading the thread, it sounds like there’s really only two ways to take her words as a compliment, and neither makes much sense to me:

(1) Some people are reading extra words into hers, which aren’t there. They take “he is not someone I would hook up with or be a fwb with” and turn it into “he is not someone I would ONLY hook up with or MERELY be a fwb with.” If that’s what she meant, then yeah it’s a compliment, but you have to cop to the fact that she didn’t actually write it that way. Even after learning that her words are hurtful from her bf, and even after talking with her guy friends who agree, she still doesn’t write it in that more careful way. So I highly doubt she said it that way to her bf originally—there’s no way she would omit it here, if she said it, when specifically seeking feedback on whether what she said was hurtful or not.

(2) Some people are suggesting that “guys I would hook up with” and “guys I would marry” are just mutually exclusive categories. Put differently, no man gets to be in both. And between the two, they argue, the higher compliment is being in “guys I would marry.” Other men have pointed this out in the thread, but we never see these as mutually exclusive. Yes, there are people we’d hook up with and NOT marry (e.g., hot but crazy and unstable), but I seriously can’t imagine someone I’d marry but NOT hook up with. I guess if they are ugly and rich and I was going to be a gold digger (which I would never do personally)? I guess if I’m settling hard (ditto)? Note how neither of these are compliments. The male ideal, as someone said earlier, is to find someone you want to hook up with AND marry. So from a man’s POV, she just told him that he’s not the ideal—he’s incomplete.

The polarization comes from the fact men know things about women not even women know about themselves. All men understand that her feelings mean that she is not really attracted to him at an animalistic level, as in trully desired. Women want to feel desired at that kind of level in a relation but for some reason they can't empathize with men when they want that too.

>>41015373
not to mention she is admiting to be the kind of woman that would have friends with benefits or hook-ups which is universally a redflag

>>41012714
>Is this whole thing really just husband material = ugly or something?
no it's "i wouldn't want to hook-up with you" = ugly

>>41011575
Why do you assume that women want to ride "cock carousel", sorry but having sex with men is not very nice. Males are not very sexy and they can be dangerous. Better to find some nice guy to play house with

>>41015393
>>41012714
not ugly but just not hot. Imagine telling your wife/gf you find her cute but not hot

>>41011642
Gays are even worse, its all open relationships and no commitment. Why you pretend its better?

>>41009760
I'm FTM but obviously she directly said he was ugly, too ugly to have sex with. How else is this supposed to be interpreted? Anything else is a troll

>>41015406
That isn't a good thing.

>>41015377
Men don't understand anything, they just make up things to get insecure about. Sorry but women don't have similar sexuality as men do and do not experience "animalistic desire" towards men.. women rather read erotic fanfiction about werewolves than watch cis mens nudes. if you want a female like that, date an ftm who is on testosterone

>>41015422
Are you that insecure that if someone sees you as husband material it means that you are ugly? Sorry liddle poon, cissies ain't gonna pick you

>>41015523
NTA but the problem is not "being seen as husband material", the problem is "i would not hook up with you"
men want to be seen as both husband material AND hookup material
for most men when they say to woman that she is wife material they also mean they would want to have an ons with her even if they would prefer a long term relationship

>>41015510
>women don't find you attractive, don't be entitled
>but I guess if you want to pump life savings into someone that does, here's an unshaved mentally ill duide in a wig
nah I thihk we will end up producing hot robo bitches insttead, actually. AGI 10/10s with real androphilia, gotta email Musk about this.

>>41015696
Im sure it will happen any day now

People who can't understand why telling a person basically "yeah if we weren't already dating I probably wouldn't choose to fuck you" comes off as insulting are literally retarded

>>41015727
doesn't need to happen tomorrow. The feminist sows and the related eunuchs will live long enough to seethe a decade or two from now and that's what matters

>>41015815
retard, where is she saying she wouldnt fuck him??? not wanting to be a fuck buddy is different from not wanting sex

>>41009760
>I wouldn't use you for sex, I would marry you
>retarded moid took offense to this
I keep saying that str8 women and gay men are zoophiles because there is no way these things are human.

>>41015923
try reading the whole sentence next time, illiterate faggot
>if we weren't already dating I probably wouldn't choose to fuck you
It may not have been her intention to imply that, but she's retarded so the way she said it comes off like that. Only a fucking moron would think any possible variation of "you aren't a guy I'd hookup with/fuck/have a fling with" or anything similar would come off as a compliment to a dude. She could've literally just said the part about him being a guy she'd marry without the rest of it, and it would have actually gotten across the point she wanted it to. Including the rest had no purpose and was going to most likely offend like 90%+ of people who might have heard it.

>>41015974
>Only a fucking moron would think any possible variation of "you aren't a guy I'd hookup with/fuck/have a fling with" or anything similar would come off as a compliment to a dude
jesus, men are so obsessed with sex.
marriage material >>> fwb

>>41015843
Okey buddy :D i think women will do fine

>>41015998
Trannies are ironically so obsessed with binary thinking that they can't understand that one doesn't necessarily have to preclude the other.

YOU CAN TELL A GUY YOU'D MARRY HIM WITHOUT IMPLYING THERE'S A SITUATION WHERE YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO FUCK HIM

>>41015998
marriage material & fwb material >>> marriage material

>>41009999
The issue is the one night stands. She's saying other guys get easy and free sexual access, but he gets difficult and expensive sexual access. She's making him pay more to make up for the discounts she kept giving other men before him. What she said to him laid this out as plain as day and is what tipped the guy that he's the one paying for what she sees as her past mistakes (and if she doesn't see them as mistakes then she's going to cheat literally the second the option opens up btw).
I'm not against one night stands or guys that marry girls who've had them, but be fucking realistic about what her looseness implies the relationship is going to play out like. If she loves sex and has it freely with no regrets, great, there are guys into that. They can be either a swinger with her husband or get a repeat customer she's easy for than any other guy, but trying to larp as a high value chaste maiden after a bunch of easy fucks is laughable at best and giving the guy you marry the absolute worst deal out of everyone she's slept with. It's a lose-lose for both parties.

>>41009760
What if I can find both perspectives?

>>41010166
>Remember, never kill yourself!
I knew art chad was a pooner

>>41010249
How is this supposed to be a compliment though?
>you're not for fun, wild, animalistic sex like the other guys were, you're for the slow stuff that doesn't turn me on as quickly
No matter how she's read she outright stated her BF is sloppy seconds at best.

>>41009904
It's actually a compliment when men say it, they will sleep with less attractive women but would never want to marry one
A woman won't hookup with ugly men, but might marry one if she can't convince an employed Chad to marry her

>>41013856
Generally speaking, it's considered rude to categorize people between "would fuck" and "would have relationship with" directly to their faces, regardless of sex. People who can't understand this are fundamentally broken.

>INCEL INCEL INCEL YOU'RE AN INCEL IF YOU TAKE OFFENSE TO THIS
actually you guys just have internet brain disease, 90% of normie boomer men off the street would agree with the "incel" perspective

>>41010685
I'm not autistic and I still don't get how it's not a shitty thing to do. Your partner is an individual, not a product with better or worse specs compared to other models.

>>41016894
>Your partner is an individual, not a product with better or worse specs compared to other models.
THIS is the thing that women apparently have a hard time understanding. Treating men like a product you shop around for is dehumanizing, and just highlights that the person doing it fundamentally doesn't understand how off-putting it is to treat someone like you're showing them grace by being with them.

You're basically just implying "I had plenty of other options, but I picked you", and the kicker is the people who think like this will adamantly deny that women have a huge advantage when it comes to dating in that men are way more willing to give partners a chance than the average woman is.

>>41011292
>(now that I've had wild kinky sex with every other guy in town and some just visiting) i want to eternally devote myself to you (and have boring vanilla sex where I have a headache and don't want it two thirds of the time)

>>41013876
>pic
>le twoxchromosomes
I wonder what her opinion would be of a guy who refused to date any women who were "pump and dumps" "starter wives" or "practice girlfriends". I'm leaning towards her calling him an incel for wanting virginity and/or monogamy.

>>41009760
a true chad wouldnt give a fuck and use her body as he pleases

>>41015998
Please read >>41015373 and tell me your thoughts

i wonder why men all immediately see this as a huge insult, its almost like women use it as an insult in 9/10 cases and then tell us to pretend its not

>>41017518
nah, its exhausting to go in circles with those types of people. im going to play vidya with a friend now :)

>>41017770
This is the part that gets so tiresome, there's this attitude that's especially prevalent among women and generally left-leaning people online that if something is widely interpreted as offensive or insulting by women, it is therefore factually offensive on its face regardless of intent (see shit like "telling women to smile" that people love to complain about like it's a hate crime) but if there is something that is widely interpreted as offensive or insulting by men, the men are exhibiting toxic masculinity and misinterpreting intent.

Is there any wonder why there's so much culture war bullshit when men are being constantly told to shut the fuck up and that their own feelings don't matter by society?

>>41018071
Tellig women to smile is not insulting but it is exhausting to hear that constantly when you try to mind your own business and don't feel like smiling.

>>41017266
Don't expect your wife to be a virgin if you have used your cock. There are no pure men left, they all goon to some freak porn since they are 11 and think its not cheating or that women don't mind.

>>41016976
You are just making stuff up to get upset about..i though that men did not try to find double meanings or hidden motives and they were straight forward but apparently men hear one thing and make up wild scenarios of the "true meaning" of words. All male stereotypes are false

>>41016571
Would fuck is included in the "would be in relationship with" you idiot

>>41018356
>look at me, I'm being a faggot on purpose
maybe kill yourself

>>41018364
You are actually fucking retarded if you can't understand this. The implication that if you had just met someone and weren't already going to date them that you wouldn't be willing to hook up with them for most people carries the implicit suggestion that you don't find them sexually appealing. People who are even slightly insecure (most people) won't tend to take that as a compliment.