>be me>random Balkan peasant, middle ages, 1683, village smells like hay and regret>spend days herding goats, carving sticks, eyeing cute baker’s daughter>dream of owning a fancy hat someday, maybe three goats>life’s simple, no Wi-Fi but I’m basically the village rock-throwing champ>one morning, chilling, skipping stones in creek>hear war horns, screaming, general bad vibes>ohfuck.exe>Ottoman raiders crash the party, turbans and scimitars everywhere>grab a hoe (not that kind, pervert), try to be hero>instantly clocked by some dude with a spiked club, lights out>wake up in chains, village torched, goats probably kebabs now>tfw baker’s daughter gone forever>dragged to slave market, smells like sweat and broken dreams>sold to Ottoman sergeant for a handful of coins and a moldy orange>“you’re janissary material, kid”>mfw kidnapped into elite murder boyband>years grind by, trained to march, stab, and not ask questions>kinda jacked now, rock a dope curved sword, still lowkey miss goats>sent to Battle of Vienna, Ottomans vs. Everyone Else, total clusterfuck>city’s under siege, cannons booming, I’m sweating in my armor>charge Polish lines like I’m in a badass painting>trip on some random tent rope, get dogpiled by winged hussars
>>41021611You wrote this with AI faggot
>>41021611>wake up in Polish camp, tied to a wagon wheel>tfw prisoner speedrun achieved>Polish commander struts in, blonde beard, piercing eyes, looks like he benches warhorses>“too handsome to waste on a scaffold, Balkan lad”>uhwhat.jpg>turns out commander’s got… preferences>next few weeks, I’m less “captive” and more “reluctant camp muse”>they toss me in velvet breeches, feed me pierogi and weird beet soupIf you were born in the Middle Ages, where would you want to be born, and how would you survive as an LGBT person?
>>41021611>as a trans girl>looks inside>gay twink rapeslopI mean I dunno i have a vagina so it probably wouldn't go that well for me if I got magically transported back in time. I guess they don't know I can't have babies unless they are checking for periods
