tip: everyone but other gays (and even many of them) is homophobic, and people just claim it's your fault for being unlikable when they want to not get in trouble for saying and doing homophobic things

>>41035841
its probably mostly homophobia bro. like legit. maybe you're annoying too but i think the safe assumption is that its homophobia.

i'm a masc gay guy and ive worked with a fem gay guy and all the other guys were constantly taking the piss out of him behind his back.

>>41035970
Guys actually do that?
Ngl thats depressing to have your anxiety confirmed

>>41035985
guys only do that because women pressure them to socially exclude gay men
men who are positive or affirming towards gay men will be shunned and shamed as gay themselves
a society with no women wouldn't have any homophobia at all

>>41035841
How do they “make it known”? Some guys are just quiet & would rather not interact with anybody & maybe you’re just misreading the situation

t. Have been told I look like a douchebag despite not speaking words to anyone

>>41036020
Subtly glaring or dead eyes, giving one word answers and act generally combative or aggressive to questions "what's that supposed to mean" "what are you looking at?" type statements

While immediately acting friendly and charismatic when talking to women or other straight men

>>41036057
That’s 100% homophobia. It wouldn’t matter how nice you tried to he they’ve already decided they don’t like you for being a fag. We can just clear that up right now for you anon

>>41035989
Can you stop it with this retarded shit?

>>41036077
my whole life people have been claiming I am unlikable while every social interaction I make fails
my own family denies I am a flamer

>>41036100
In a sense you still kind of *are* unlikable since people find you unpleasant but the reason they do is because of your sexual orientation, NOT because you’re annoying or unfunny or whatever you think is wrong with you. It still sucks but it really doesn’t at the same time. Fuck those people, associate with those who actually want to be cool with you

>>41036133
they have never once admitted they found me unpleasant due to my sexual orientation except one dude who I guess I eyefucked too hard and he called me a faggot to my face
>Fuck those people, associate with those who actually want to be cool with you
I don't want to be stuck in a ghetto where I can only socialize with other gays, why can't people just not be assholes towards gays?

It's like anything I say is under a microscope so they can blame me for being evil and deserving to be shunned.

>>41036150
People are careful about expressing their hatred for certain groups & often make up something to justify their dislike of you. So they won’t overtly say they hate you because you’re a faggot they’ll say you’re creepy or dumb or what have you
>I don’t want to be in a ghetto socializing with other gays
You don’t have to. There are other non gay men you could be around, or at least not have some awkward encounter with.

>>41036184
I dunno I feel like everyone is gonna use me being gay against me except other gays.

>>41036188
You’ve just had bad experiences & other people’s dumb assessment of you being unlikable for other reasons fill your head. I think you’ll be fine, it’s just finding the right crowd. It’s impossible to constantly just be met with hostility unless you’re amongst fellow gays

>>41036203
see that's the thing this situation manifests in a variety of different social settings, its always someone coming up with some dumb thing that i said or did as evidence im an awful person and then they get to shun and bully me after that cuz then its my fault
it just made me stay out of the world and nobody gets it and everyone blames me

>>41036203
and, in contrast, when I interact with obviously gay people it's usually totally different + obvious that this time at the least they aren't out to get me, except the self hating kinds and it never really goes as far with the antagonism

>>41036208
You don’t have to be in depth but can you elaborate on the things you’ve done someone uses as evidence against you being a monster? Did they do this in public to you?

>>41036222
I kinda blocked out most of it but typically like mean or hostile things I said but its usually like a week or two after I said them and they never really confront you when it happens they wait and gang up on you and by the time you are "called out" it is over.
>in public
not usually but the thing with women is once a social opinion of you is spoken it spreads and everyone is aware of it in a day or two

>>41036188
I have straight male friends. So its not everyone. But also like a group of guys will follow group mentality so there only needs to be a couple of homophobes and the rest of the guys will follow their lead to fit in with the other guys and avoid being ostracised from that group for being pro faggot or whatever.

>>41036232
but you only have them cuz ur submissive towards them
that's the thing, or maybe you aren't a flamer and ur one of those bisexual agps who cuts in on any thread alleging homophobia to deny it
whenever I tried to at all lead or have my own ideas proposed they would be kinda ignored and I wasn't taken seriously
I think its women creating this group mentality, I don't blame men for it
women expect men to hate you for being gay or else it proves you are gay too

>>41036231
I would suggest not hanging around people who throw your past in your face, especially if you’ve moved on from whatever you said. Like I said, learning who to associate with is important. You don’t need to excommunicate yourself from society, maybe start small. Do you online game?

>>41036249
I have spatial skills issues so gaming is not a realistic option for me. I have poor fine motor control. I am built to talk, so it's ironic I have really good verbal communication skills but every time I would try to join a social group there was this sense like I could tell apart who the popular and middle and lower people were in the hierarchy, would try to align with the popular ones cuz it was fun to talk to them, and I would notice little things about them, maybe they were cruel or said something they clearly didn't mean, and it felt like when I got eventually called out, they weren't ever really mad about what they claimed to be, they were more fearful I would expose their faults and had to pick the thing I said that looked the worst so they could keep me at a distance without looking bad for doing so - then I would get chucked in with the nerds or made to be alone.

>>41036261
Making friends is genuinely a lot harder past college since meeting people past that really only happens through your job or family maybe. You said you’re short & skinny so you probably wouldn’t do any clubbing or gyms?

>>41035841
usually when you tell them youre gay and they act all fine about it but then slowly start becoming more distant and then just ignoring you because its not like we were childhood friends or anything. i think thats a good indicator that they hate you cause youre gay lol.

>>41036274
>Making friends is genuinely a lot harder past college
no it was genuinely impossible past age 7-8 once people stopped treating you as an innocent child and started being hypercritical of me
>You said you’re short & skinny
that was another anon

>>41036283
So would you go to clubs (not gay bars) or gyms?

>>41036287
no interest
I already hike

>>41036296
Met anyone interesting on the hike to converse with yet?

>>41036301
sometimes, but like nobody i exchanged contact info with
I've noticed I'm a lot more social than most people are I like just random conversations and people are mostly ready to move on, but then, I'm ugly so it was always doomed
DOOMED