>>41479360
asl?

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>>41479369
i am 21 but this is not a freaking horny dating post this is a quasi mental breakdown post

my heart already pines for someone anyway but it’s someone i will never ever be able to have most likely unless the universe somehow blesses me with their love

i hate it all so much

>>41479360
You just suck it up and do it, because you are the only one who can.

>>41479457
what do i do first? how do i do it? i just dont understand
every time i try and think about it i just feel like an awful disgusting clown
i dont know what to do

>>41479360
if you pass for a cute boy then just keep boymoding, being a non-passing tranny is social suicide...

>>41479469
you just do it
you decide to look as passable as you can and act like a woman
nobody cares

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>>41479482
i don’t even know what im perceived as…i don’t get compliments…
when i was younger in high school boymoding on HRT i used to get called a faggot a lot and people would be weird around me
but now that im an adult and work its like radio silence

the closest thing ive received to a compliment is earlier a couple weeks ago i had to go to this place late at night because i work night shift and this guy who had to escort me to a building started talking to me about energy drinks and then asked what my pronouns were and i was so taken aback and did not expect it i was like “nah dude im a bro haha im a man dudebro man im not bout that hahahahaaha” and he was like oh cause you could go either way honestly with how you look

thats the closest thing ive received and it honestly makes me feel bad because i feel like even when i am trying to boymode i look like a hon freakazoid who should just stay inside forever

i wish i had a boyfriend

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>>41479493
i just don’t want my friend to hurt me
i dont want to lose my job
i dont want to alienate myself from my coworkers
i dont want to be a social pariah in public
i dont want to be a weirdo tranny failure freak
i just wish i was normal
i just wish i had a boyfriend to make me feel safer
it might be easier then i think

>>41479360
>>41479406
>>41479528
>started in hs
>thinks she doesn't pass
>refuses to voice train for 6 years
>has chasers sniffing her out in person
>wants a man to do everything for her
I'd feel bad for you if you weren't so brainwormed and doing this to yourself.

>>41479549
coulda woulda shoulda

>>41479406
only asked because this means you started hrt as a kid. you lucky fuck. maybe youre in a region that is more supportive. this is all on you alright? Try a little more. your employers can tell.

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>>41479565
i don’t know how to make the brainworms stop
ive voice trained a little but not nearly enough every time i do it i end up crying but im trying to be better about it

i just think it would be easier if i had a man to lean back on and support me throughout this because it’s just so scary and i dont want to be alone anymore
i dont want to be alone anymore

i just feel gridlocked and i dont know how to move forward i hate it all so much

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>>41479614
i live in a red state and even my coworkers joke about “trannies” it feels awful
and the worst part is i think on some level they know something is wrong
i met the director of my department for the first time a week ago and this company luncheon thing and he stared at me a couple of times in a investigatory manner idk it was weird and i felt weird and i hate being a stupid tranny faggot loser so much

i just wish there was a step by step guide i just don’t know how to formulate a plan

>>41479549
yeah well I wish I was 20 years younger and 100 lbs thinner
You are the only one who can do it. Do not ask "what if" - answer, with "this."

>>41479650
Gtfo of the red state, it will kill you. Go be cringe and gay in the great blue seas of the west or east coast.

>>41479712
don't do this, blue states are full of crime

>>41479718
Red states ARE the crime anon, the cops and citizens will kill you in the street for being queer

>>41479727
red states are the ones where the violence is in your hands. you have no idea how good it is until it's gone. don't ruin your life over some rando on the internet telling you to move out.

>>41479360
>ive been boymoding on HRT for almost 6 years
wtf is wrong with you. I want to kidnap you and leave the town/country with you and start all over and force you into fem cloths

>>41479631
>>41479360
>tfw will never be her rock

>>41479742
The violence is even more out of your hands retard, you can't control the cops clocking you unless you live entirely in the closet and repress. If you genuinely expect a red state tranny to be "in control" of the violence against her you're a monster or a troll.

>>41479757
Burning boymoders past lives and rebirthing them as girlmoders is so much fun, highly recommended.
t. west coast chad

>>41479821
everything is fine for them, why do you want to scare them into leaving their life and home ?

>>41479868
>everything is fine for them
Troll it is then, because you didn't even read the thread. Byebye retard.

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>>41479712
>>41479821

i wish i could leave this state i wfm ever since going into the new department so i could in theory if i just saved up enough money but the main thing keeping me here is my elderly parents who have no one to take care of them and they are getting older and older with more health issues

i just want to fly away sometimes

i wish i could leave this place and be in a place thats amicable to my existence and find a nice boyfriend to lead me
it would be so nice

>>41479902
they are not in danger of losing their life.

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>>41479757
one of my greatest fantasies is having a yandere bf kidnap me and force me to girl mode and hypnotize me into forgetting my past life and conditioning me into being his good girl and then we live happily ever after in our new life

but that will never happen

and ill continue to be a lonely failure tranny boymoding loser
i just want someone to hold me

>>41479913
my friend might hurt me if he knew

>>41479949
god i wish i had a friend that would hurt me when i ask.

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>>41479983
you are kinda weird desu and that’s coming from a tranny boymoding loser failure who has done nothing all day but sleep and look at 4chan in bed

>>41479940
I'm going to have to step up and be the evil yandere to remedy this

>>41479998
don't worry, i believe you and hold your opinion dearly in my heart

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>>41480008
it’s not that evil if the boymoder wants it anyway

>>41480075
Alright, let us commence our yandere arc.

>>41480117
please hypnotize me and capture me

>>41480136
I don't know much about hypnosis yet, but I do want you.

You should had been voice training retard

>>41480192
i know i would have stints of voice training but i would just feel so hopeless and cry and stop all together cause i feel like im ngmi

im trying to be better about it now and consistently voice train but its hard

U do u anon
I'm never socially transitioning.
Why give up male privilege
I'm the MAYNnnn I'm the dude I'm the homie u kno I'm a lotta people's top dog. I'm a real G I'm the kinda guy they say "Hey my guy" to you know.
I will keep taking the meds cause why not.

>>41479528
post some pics so we can confirm or deny your delusions of not passing... this board is at least honest

>>41480136
>>41480156
Where do I find you, sweet boymoder

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>>41480570
i don’t wanna post pictures of my stupid tranny face i look awful and weird
ive never posted my face to this board
im scared

i think im just going to get ramen and monster and cry

>>41480857
is it you again?
even if my heart was not already set on someone
i doubt you are anywhere close to me
very rarely do i see people post that they are in or near my state

such is the life of a stupid tranny boymoding loser

>early hrt youngshit complaining
urgh

>>41481352
i don’t pass! im a weirdo stupid failure moder!! it’s all so tiresome

>>41479360
you're a weirdo

>>41480075
this image literally stunlocks me. being held from behind in a chokehold and my boob squeezed by someone who loves me deeply (even when im being dysphoric) would fix me

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/lgbt/ ruined a generation of trans woman.

[Verse 1]
BDD and Estradiol, conceited with low self-esteem
She's a chasers dream if your a sadist
Long tranny bangs and oversized hoodies
Thinks TCD is the way to go
She's a faggot, a tranny, and a stupid fucking bitch
[Verse 2]
Progesterone highs and SSRIs
A thousand-yard stare for everyone's eyes
That she thinks are always mocking her
Retarded views on politics
Likes to listen to shitty music
She injects and swallows bathtub estrogen
[Verse 3]
She saw Tomoko Kuroki
And felt so empowered
By an anime made in pedo land
It's sad to think she's someone's son
Like a tranny to the gashouse
But honestly, I'd still hit if I could
[Verse 4]
BDD and Pioglitazone, 21 years old but acts like she's 16
Likes to stay inside 'cause she's a fucking fag
Unkeeped hair but dick on her mind
Estogen lifetime supply
She's a faggot, a tranny, and started HRT at <20
[Verse 5]
Only chasers in homo denial think she's anything worthwhile
Her infertile lifestyle will drive you wild
She's an weed adicted loser bitch that likes to listen to shitty music
She injects and swallows bathtub estrogen
[Verse 6]
She saw Tomoko Kuroki
And felt so empowered
By an anime made in pedo land
It's sad to think she's someone's son


Fin.

>>41481360
wow same, wanna be friends?

>>41481079
Isn't that the whole point of your fantasy?
For me to come whisk you away and bring you back to mine.

>>41481419
i know i am…

>>41481531
i guess you’re right…that is a central tenet to my fantasy
it would be so nice to be whisked away like that never to return to my old sad life
it would be so nice…
i just wish it could be with him…

>>41481854
I'll keep holding out for you, delicate boymoder. One day you will be happy.

>>41481854
You just have oneitis, and it's just as dangerous for women as it is for men
Get a practice bf and you'll either get the courage to go after your Chad, or realize there are other Chads out there. Win/win

>how do I socially transition
Well anon, there are many paths. I'll present a few including the option I had used.

>option A.
Come out to some VERY trusted individuals or possibly join a local lgbt group to discuss this irl, slowly start working yourself up. Experiment with fashion and make up, voice train! Maybe even hop on to a omegle clone as a way to see how you are being clocked as practice.
>option b.
Slowly start shifting your appearance and demeanor to your desired gender until people start to question things. Wear girl jeans, get bangs, try girl shoes, wear make up, get earrings, change how you speak etc.
>option c, the one I chose
Completely Come out all at once, going by your chosen name as often as possible and presenting female 100% of the time. This was very hard on me at first, and those around me, if I could do it all over I'd choose a or b. But after everyone got used to.it things became normal again. It was also a trail by fire for passing as I live in the south and had only gone out as female a handful of times before coming out. But voice training i swear is such a huge part of this.

If you never have, go to a day bar or something dressed female. Welcoming environment and you can start to feel yourself.

>>41481978
i don’t want a “practice bf” or anything like that i dont look at dating like this

hes a special unique lovely person that i admire so much
i want him
but most of all i want him to be happy
i would take a lifetime of unhappiness and pain and unfulfillment if it meant he could have a lifetime of happiness and fulfillment and achieving his goals and living the life he wants to live
and hes alone
i dont want him to be alone
i dont want him to call himself a loser
i wish i could hold him and tell him how much of a special cool person he is and how hes not a loser at all

>>41482075
thank you for writing this anon i really appreciate it

i think im just going to go for option b
it seems the least painful and i dont have anyone trusted for option a

im just scared
soemthing i would like to do is get trannybangs, my hair is one of the few nice parts of myself that i like and its long but i just part it in the middle so bangs would be really nice and i think help me pass
ill try and do some research on women’s clothing as well…i think i would like cozy things like sweaters and turtlenecks but idk

thank you for writing this i appreciate it

>>41479528
I’m nta but you’re so similar to me that it’s almost scary. I’m also 21 years of age, but I’ve only been on hrt for 5 years. I had similar experiences boymoding since high school, but I went into hrt after an early and strong puberty with the intention to stay on it forever due to being 5’11” and being unable to ever pass. Even nowadays, I just cannot look past my height and will never be able to see myself as a woman so I’m forced into living as a straight male. Funnily enough, I also actually act extremely straight and weird when anything lgbt is mentioned for some reason. If you’re 21 years of age then you’ve been on hrt since 15 which is insane… what’s keeping you from not just being yourself?

>>41479528
>then asked what my pronouns were
>soemthing i would like to do is get trannybangs
if you are passing as androgynous and haven't even done your hair up or dressed female wouldn't you would just pass.
most people i know talk about how much they hate gays and immigrants but you would be suprised how tolerant they are if you act demure and don't strike as some sort of stereotype. most of the hatred i see is directed at the more flamboyant archetypes

>>41482472
>i dont look at dating like this
Yup that's oneitis and it's the source of 75% of incels. Better make a move fast or you're gonna regret it/be asking What If for 50 years