Can money buy you a boyfriend or does it corrode any nascent relationship?I talked to a guy for six months, and at some point I started giving him money and buying him things regularly.Part of that was rooted in good-natured generosity: he is very poor, and I make more money than I know what to do with, so it was a way for me to show that I care for him.But another part of that was rooted in manipulation and a desire for control. I wanted him to love me back, and I thought that if I showed him that I could give him a life free of pecuniary difficulties, then I would have my boyfriend.I was wrong about that. Who's to say whether I could have made different choices to end up right or whether there was never going to be happy ending given those circumstances.Regardless, I think of the money as having cast a corruptive patina over the relationship. It made me suspicious of any affection he might have shown me and resentful of any further requests for money. For him, I can only speculate how he felt, but I wonder whether there wasn't a sense of indignation at his having to manage my emotions so that he might have more crumbs thrown his way.(Boo, if you're reading this, I know this is all very cringe but let me do my emotional processing, okay?)Now that I've laid out my situation, does anyone here have any further thoughts on the nature of money in a relationship? Can a power imbalance like that, where one person has very little money and the other very much, ever work out in a mutually beneficial way? Or does it typically doom a relationship like it did mine?
>>41534231>I talked to a guy for six months, and at some point I started giving him money and buying him things regularly.aw :( thats so cute but i think you'll find that men get very insecure when you make more money than they do!!!
>>41534231my father pulls this shit all the time, tries to pay his way out of caring for me. Expects all of the emotional availability but never gives any in return. The only currency that makes a relationship, sexual or chaste, fertile is honesty. If you don't have enough honesty for the money to cross the bridge with trust it will burn or snap the support on the bridge. There are a lot of reasons that money can sour a relationship, egos, feelings of general resentment. I could, right now, take care of my father full time and hold a job, pull in almost 10k a MONTH. but to do that I would need to accept a relationship built on lies, and non stop do anything he says even if I know its destroying him. The idea of taking that money in exchange for doing my dad harm sickens me to the core, on top of all the rage I feel over how I was treated. One time some relative I know told me to always accept gifts when people give them instead of spurn them, that same relative told me later that I was taking advantage of him by accepting the wage he gave me to perform stuff for his job. Ultimately I want you to understand that this subject doesn't have an easy answer but yes it absolutely can sink a relationship faster than anything, however normally when it does it wasnt a very strong relationship anyway. Trust is the most important currency for relationships and its why jewish charactatures enjoy mixed race societies since it impoverishes the publics trust while theirs is retained by a combination of made men blackmail and racial superiority rhetoric.
>>41534330Yeah, you may be right. I posted about my dating woes in chasergen one time and got that as feedback from the chasers there. It sucks because I obviously like to be financially independent, but not if it's going to scare off potential partners
>>41534345Damn, I don't know about the Jewish stuff at the end there, but thank you for your perspective and I'm sorry you went through that with your fatherIt's funny because growing up my father was a great provider but very much emotionally not present when I needed him to be, and I don't have a relationship with him today. It's sad to think that I have had similar inclinations, like I am my father's daughter :')
>>41534231If a tranny can afford to support me she can have me as her stay at home top.
>>41534231>Boo, if you're reading this, I know this is all very cringe but let me do my emotional processing, okay?It's ok girl, you let it all out. So long as I can get my rent covered for next month you know it's all good <3
>>41534231LOL FEMALE SIMP
>>41534559Now that's the thing, that's what this motherfucker had on the table, you know? And yet the whole thing went to hell so I feel like it might be one of those "be careful what you wish for" kind of things
>>41534706I'm not a coward though.
>>41534594You are not my boo. He doesn't talk like that
>>41534231Oh neat, you're really thinking like a man.That should work, though You know how they think because you're on the inside... real wiseguy over here
>>41534728I mean yeah, I was raised as a boy and lived as a man. Are you trying to trigger me or something?? ofc I know what it's like to be a man lmao
>>41534722Does your boo actually use tttt tho lol?
>>41534794Yeah haha, I met him here and I know he posts here regularly
>>41534759Well, it strikes me that you want to be transgirlfriend or something yet you'reyou knowmanmoding it
Here comes the fireworks
>>41534826Well, I guess I'll just never spend money on a boyfriend ever again then
>>41534231Probably need the relationship before the financial dependence I don't think there are any objective hardlines like this when it comes to relationships. It's certainly an obstacle that will affect most of them, and, one you should be wary of, but anything can work with the right person/enough communication/etc
>>41534879You realize you're not just "spending money" on your boyfriend. It's not your turn for dinner, you're getting a little thoughtful gift.You are doing male manipulator shit and that's why you made this thread.
>>41534819For fuck sake hahahhaha.Girl get a journal for the shit that you need to work out for yourself. Get a therapist for the things you need a pair of ears for, and talk to him about the things that you need to communicate. You've got the money you can probably get a really nicely bound one or something. The journal that is not the therapist. Or just use a notes app. Blogposting on 4chan is literally pvp journalling
>>41534944>pvp blogpostingyou're not making an arguement for him to stopalso explains why /soc/ is so bad, it's basically a hugbox filled with losers who couldn't handle getting griefed. as someone who loathed and chimped out at getting griefed in mmos, I can understand their emotions but their solution, as usual, was wrong
>>41534231the only money i need is john money #agp4life
I mean, it can buy you a boyfriend just not a particularly good one
>>41534900I know, you're right>>41534944Lol yeah fair. Well he blocked me so this is more of a postmortem than anything else, but yeah. Maybe not the place for it>>41534972I don't understand this. I don't go to /soc/ never really have
>>41535055>Lol yeah fair. Well he blocked me so this is more of a postmortem than anything else, but yeah. Maybe not the place for itAw sorry to hear that anon. Tbf I'm just telling myself off for being here tonight more than anything. Trying to curb the habit. You know how it is. Fr I don't know how to go about your situation cause it's never something I've personally experienced or encountered. I try and date at a relatively similar power level, I don't really like dating down in power too much, and I haven't really had the opportunity to date up with power, nor the desire for it. Money is a form of power. There's other kinds of power. But yeah. Idk what that means for you in terms of dating. You'll figure it out! Good luck and take care.
>>41535099For sure! This is my first time back here in a couple months. Going to try to get back on the wagon tomorrow haha. Thanks for the kind words and advice, you take care as well :)
>>41534231what are your letters?i went from thinking you were a gay bottom to a gay top to mtf after reading the first reply
>>41535055just go to /soc/ for 5 minutes and you will understand its not pvp blogposting at alll. its every jeet phenotype white for 100k miles begging for bob and vagine. they think their blogposting means they are owed sex instead of 1v3 me.
>>41535124I'm an mtf haha
>>41535132Ooh, I see what you mean. Idk if I've ever been there, stupid me but I thought it stood for sociology lol
>>41535117I do have a control thing, where if I have some degree of control in a relationship it can take the place where trust and security and self worth should exist. And I'm currently working on relinquishing control and trying to retrain the parts of my brain that are wired to freak out when I do that to not worry so much. That's a thing idk if you may or may not relate to. Control can look a lot like kindness and help sometimes. It's hard to untangle the two. Trying to act from love and not fear as much as possible. It's a work in progress. But yeah. Take care once again anon. Just felt like sharing that cause it came to mind.
>>41535144ohyou should date men from the same socioeconomic class imo
>>41534231>has well off gf>gets insecure We men truly have brain poison
>>41534231I think those relationships can work and it's sweet of you that you gave him money since he's so poor. A lot of these relationships fail because the difference in life experiences makes it difficult to relate to each other's problems, especially around money. Are you sure it was just the money though or were there maybe other issues too? You can't just throw money at a problem and expect that to solve everything. From your other comments it seems like you have some issues so maybe that contributed to it and going to therapy might be helpful, especially since you seem to have the money to afford it.
>>41534231Please be my sugar mommy?
>>41537939Cringe
>>41534330fpbp, the only way this would work is if you're a 45 year old milf going for a 25 year old man with mommy issues
