i hate being trans. i hate how much work i have to put in for this. i hate that i feel like i'm lying when i tell people i'm a woman but that anything else feels like a much deeper lie. i hate that i don't think i'll ever see myself as passing no matter how many people tell me otherwise. i hate how expensive transitioning is. i hate having a family that's disgusted by me. i hate that the thought of using a public restroom terrifies me. i hate that i can't self destruct like i want to because i actually care about my future now. i hate that i can't kill myself because i don't wanna be a statistic used to harm other trannies and because i have friends that love me and a boyfriend that loves me and because sometimes when i look in the mirror i feel genuinely happy so i'm not allowed to give up anymore. i wish that i was born a woman or that being a man didn't make me wanna die. i'm so tired.
>>41549713i hate that i have to take hrt. like okay i'm growing boobs on a moid body but i'm not doing this for any pleasure.it's literally a consequence of me being severly mentally ill. i couldn't survive without hrt. fuck this.
>>41549719being a patient for my whole life SUCKS. voice training SUCKS. the fact that i have to teach myself as an adult how to do things cis women were taught growing up SUCKS.
>>41549713and then what i'm a woman now? that's shitty too! now i get sexually harassed and i have to be afraid being alone at night and i spend an extra hour getting ready everytime i go out just to look presentable. at least i don't get periods those sound like they suck.
that's life kid
My auntie likes to say stuff like "well there were some kids that had parents that die at age 12" and like, my thoughts were "yeah but that's not me." I feel you can also feel you're not other types of miserable people, whether bigots or other suffering people. Since you have hope that is all that matters and this stranger here believes in you too. Sure you can have regrets about "this stuff easier as a kid; working on practicing hobbies and skills younger is easier." but the past doesn't exist, and other envied ideals don't exist either. Only you and your right now/present exist. I'm happy for that each day too.
>>41549713i wish i could hug you to make you feel better, so i'll just say that while it never stops sucking, it does get better, and its worth all the effort. It isnt fair that life makes shit like this hard for you. It helps to view it as a challenge or whatever. Cringe as this is, if you look at it like overcoming the bad guy in a video game or something, it can help a lot.Thats what works best for the tranners I know, anyway.
What effort? I take a couple of pills every day. Big deal.
One day, if you are lucky, you will blossom into the flower that is truly inside you.
>>41549713Have you ever considered that your gender dysphoria is just an errant thought that you got too carried away with and your brain used it to rewrite your entire being? And now you will never be happy without looking deep down and accepting that you are a man?
>>41549945>>41549988yeah, i know. i have a lot to be grateful for. i rarely get misgendered anymore and i'm happier than i've ever been realistically speaking. when i'm feeling sad it's just about the fact that my life would have been easier if i wasn't trans. thanks for engaging in my cringe ass emo vent post when all my friends were asleep love you guys.
>>41550186What you mean is you wish you had transitioned sooner to enjoy the experience you have now and could have had more time to develop and curate your experience in childhood so that you’re life as a woman would be ready to go.
>>41549713>>41549719>>41549740>>41549773God, you're so right. I'm so so so sick of this, but the alternative is so much worse.>>41549999Hon hands typed this post.
>>41550065folks like you would probably ostracize Copernicus or Marie Curie or whatever.Regardless, why do you actually care so fucking much? The ONLY motive you have for caring so much about "trans folks not looking inside them and ACCEPTING their god given body" supposedly is LITERALLY either religion or patronization/benevolence; the former being literally the other in disguise.So tell me, are you a real-ass GOOD GUY or do you just have too much fuckign FREE TIME. Folks like you? Do you REALLY think we'd do this shit ON PURPOSE FOR EXTRA MISERY. no fucking trans person WANTS to be trans, that was the whole fucking point. We DO THIS TO BECOME HAPPIER AND GROW INTO WHAT WE DREAM FOR, BECAUSE OF A DICE ROLL AT BIRTH, THAT'S FUCKING IT. This is what happens when your education system grows from hot-garbage and lassaiez fair neoliberals.
>>41550065NTA but yes, many times. Unfortunately it just doesn’t work. In fact, that questioning process just spirals me into depression and inevitably more dysphoria. There are clinicians with a much higher level of experience than your armchair psychology that know this, which is why treatment for gender dysphoria has existed for decades. If it were a simple delusion you could just dose us with lamotrigene and a few rounds of talk therapy and it’d be done. That just doesn’t work, though.
>>41551521Real doesn't have to put in work. Real simply is.
>>41551647being born a male and growing up male as a child requires effort to undo, it dossn't matter if you're hon mchon or gigapassoid youngshit. i never got taught how to wear makeup, dress properly or even some manners that come with being a woman. delulu right here if you think these things are baked into "trutrans"
>>41551709I don't wear makeup, and I wear a dress maybe twice a year. Other people still think I'm female and have the sensibilities and mannerisms of a woman.
>>41551726>never wears makeup>sensibilities of a woman
>>41551709Being male CANT be undone nigger
>>41551726nta but what's the point of this kind of bragging but an attempt to lift yourself up by putting others down? "Well I'M lucky!" like okay? Good for you, why rub it in people's faces if it's even true?
>>41551811ttranny hands typed this
>>41549713just present as your biological sex then
>>41551814Because nonpassers cause the problemsnand should detransition.
>>41551709I'm an autistic FtM and I was never taught or learned any of this either, it's ok!
>i'll kill myself if i can't look this waythat's just weakness
>>41549719>unironically saying moid like you weren't socialized and raised as a maletopfuckinkek
>>41549713>i hate being trans. i hate how much work i have to put in for this. i hate that i feel like i'm lying when i tell people i'm a woman but that anything else feels like a much deeper lie. i hate that i don't think i'll ever see myself as passing no matter how many people tell me otherwise. i hate how expensive transitioning is. i hate having a family that's disgusted by me. i hate that the thought of using a public restroom terrifies me. i hate that i can't self destruct like i want to because i actually care about my future now. i hate that i can't kill myself because i don't wanna be a statistic used to harm other trannies and because i have friends that love me and a boyfriend that loves me and because sometimes when i look in the mirror i feel genuinely happy so i'm not allowed to give up anymore. i wish that i was born a woman or that being a man didn't make me wanna die. i'm so tired.okay but literally every single TERF says trannies are the most privileged and worshipped group in the world so you're wrong
>>41550001i always envied how they give absolutely zero fucks about their appearance desu, they're so detached to reality and what others think of them, might be nice
>>41553044I am like this but I am a straight cis man so people don't really bat an eye at me
>>41553044this is because they're mentally cishet men with a humiliation fetish
>>41552902Okay, do you identify with your job? You'll kill yourself without a means to eat right?Do you identify with your friends and hobbies? You'll kill yourself without those or a means to improve those right?Do you identify with living a life you deem to have purpose for? You'll kill yourself without that right?Lmao at the negative iq logic of you people.It's also not about "Looks" and if you had basic levels of comprehension you'd know that others get to care about what they care about and it's about live and let live and not caring about others when it's not ur businessl Especially politically. YOU not caring about something = EVERYONE SHOULDNT CARE ABOUT IT AND THUS IM BETTER is ur fucking logic lulLooks also matter socially you moron.
>>41549713i think you are a beautiful woman anon pls dont kys
>>41551726When 99% of people say "I pass" they mean "I pass as a trans women". I don't get misgendered IRL, but when asked, most people would likely guess I'm a trans woman
>>41549713why did you post this before me twin?
>>41549713>friends that love you>boyfriend that loves youYoure gonna make it
>>41549713>>41549719>>41549740>>41549773i dont really have anything to add but youre so real nona. everything takes such an unbelievable amount of effort it sucks so fucking much
>>41549713I hate both outing myself and being stealth. Being out is stressful and it sucks out my joy, I can only swing between stress and depressive apathy. Being stealth is stressful and lonely. I prefer stealth, but I wish I was cis so neither of these would be an option.
