Important context is that I'm an FTM NEET with no IRL friends after moving. I have a friend from home with whom I used to text regularly up until 2 weeks ago when she had to focus on all the schoolwork she had piling up before the end of the semester, and she has only replied to me once since to reassure me that it wasn't because of something I said. I kept spamming her messages as normal, since that's what we usually do anyways when it takes a while for one of us to respond, but that was when it took 12+ hours to respond, not 2 weeks. I already drunk texted her telling her how much i loved her, which while something I usually do when I'm drunk enough, feels so much more pathetic than normal. I'm getting legitimately sad and anxious because I miss her so much, and the worst part is that it feels so incredibly fembrained to be desperate and needy like this. Then there's the part of me that feels like a gross guy putting a bunch of emotional labor on a woman, and then there's the part of me that calls myself fembrained for thinking that way. No part of me is happy. How do I overcome this? Is there a way I can reframe this behavior as some platonic equivalent to a soulful romantic or should I just kill myself?Yes I have OCD btw and it's probably a large part of why I'm a NEET. Don't say "therapy" it's fake and gay
>>42018508yeah I know that feelWanna be friends btw?
>>42018508Some important additional clarification is that I'm not sobbing in her messages begging her to come back or threating to kill myself or anything. The closest I've gone to that was a "I miss you come back :((" once or twice, but otherwise I'm just spamming her with what I did that day, thoughts on our shared interests, stuff that reminds me of her, etc, which is what we always did with one another. My struggle is entirely with my perception of my own behavior and whether or not I need to just man up
>>42018573Maybe, I'm actually very dry outside of the two friends I regularly speak with, however. The part of my brain that handles human to human communication completely atrophied over the course of this year.
>>42018658prosoponno pressure though ofc
