>>42188562
How do you feel overall? Are you happy with your decision?

>>42188573
I was giga-dysphoric, so chopping was always a foregone conclusion for me.

Post-op depression can be very rough and gets amplified by drug detox. Coming to terms with even good surgery being flawed made me want to rope for the first time in a long while, but I feel much better about things now.

Having to do stuff like get changed or take a shower used to remind me of being trans and make me miserable, but now they just feel mundane/normal which is a nice change.

It was a pretty fucking traumatic experience NGL but I would still do it again.

>>42188714
Gotcha. How would you describe your bottom dysphoria pre and post op? I know some people have cycles of dysphoria while for others its pretty constant.

you're a brave person for that and I wish I wasnt the coward that I am

I'm afraid it wont work how I want it to / expect it to and i'll regret it. in my mind better to have a working dick than nothing working right. Im probably ignorant of how far things have progressed though. I'd probably be on super rope fuel if I found out I couldnt get off sexually / couldnt provide a good fuck.

but seriously, I respect ya. I seen a trans person with her female friend on a saturday night the other day and Im a beareded up repper with braids looking a little intimidating to some people but all I wanted to do in that moment was compliment that trans woman and tell her I admired her.

>>42188562
I'm hoping you're happy with it. I've got a big fear that if I do get it, I'll just be deeply unhappy because a lot of the dysphoria I feel now with things down there is purely sensory, which I didn't have before HRT.

>>42188859
yeah im in that place now and it absolutely is complete rope fuel. i prolly shoulda gone to bank.

>>42188790
Pre-op I was able to repress it decently a lot of the time. Sometimes the dam would break and I'd spiral. It was at its worst when I started actually trying to make surgery happen. Suporn clinic gives out date reservations via lottery, so if you're dead set on going to that clinic it raises your hopes every time the lottery comes round and then smashes them if you don't get a slot.

I used to have a lot of phantom vag type feelings and couldn't get off without pressure on the spot where the entrance is now. Dysphoria was mostly caused by physical sensation, so I tucked 24-7 outside of changing or showering to reduce movement/sensation as much as possible.

My dysphoria is mostly nonexistent now unless it gets amplified by brain doing bad things. There are a couple anatomical quirks which are mildly discomforting, but no more visceral body horror type feelings. It's mostly psychosomatic now, not so much physical.

>>42189035
The phantom vagina stuff is interesting. Was it constant? Did it exist pre-HRT?

>>42188859
It is a super scary risk. I think it's understandable to non-op if you feel OK with things as they are.

>>42188930
I'm sorry. If your op wasn't too long ago there might still be hope. I know a few people who couldn't get off for 9+ months but still got sexual function back eventually. For certain people it just takes a long time for some reason.

Try B 100 complex vitamins if you haven't already, they can help with nerve healing. IME it also helps to try not going in with expectations of reaching a particular destination. Focusing on an end goal and getting into your own head makes it much harder, it's a vicious cycle.

>>42189048
It was frequent and did happen pre HRT as well. It was one of the major reasons I realized I needed to transition.

>>42189270
Gotcha. I'm frankly curious about the cycle because I have a cyclical phantom vagina that has become less apparent during transition and has started to feel kind of weird and uncomfortable now. Was there as early as age 12 and would resurface every now and then, becoming incredibly strong by my mid-20s which pushed me to consider transition more and more.

>>42188573
No I'm not really happy with it cuz if I could have lived as a guy I would have been much happier I just felt I couldn't live as a man I didn't think I passed well enough as a man. I don't think I could fight like a man

>>42189313
Oh :(

I get that. I have similar feelings at times. I just didn't interface well with the reality of being a man even though I wanted to make it work, and at many times transition feels like me just giving up in a sad way.

>>42189325
Well now I really regret transitioning because I think I could have adjusted to being a feminine, weaker or softer man

>>42189340
But you were massively dysphoric, right? No one chooses that.

>>42189270
sadly i am well past 9 months post op. also i can orgasm but its really bad and doesnt actually feel good to touch myself or cum its more just like a physical response than anything. took the joy out of sex
>>42189035
ohh i had that same phantom vag type stuff pre op but it doesnt actually match with my post op at all fuck lol shoulda gone to bank.

>>42188562
how tall are you and when did u get hrt. ik it isnt related but im curious please and thank you. also bideltoid?

>>42189793
HRT 16 but I had blockers toward the end of 14. Height 5"5', bideltoid I haven't measured. I'm about halfway between hourglass and rectangle so not perfect body shape but not terrible.

>>42190543
How old are you now?

>>42190595
27. I wanted SRS way sooner but money time etc.

>>42190686
But you regret transitioning or is that a different anon?

>>42190543
>>42190686
Bruh, this would have been me if I just came out at 12-14 instead of trying to kms.

>>42190543
similar situation except i wasnt on blockers and got on hrt right at the end of 14. except im 5'9. interesting. im happy u got srs nona. mine is coming up soon cant wait to get rid of this fucking thing