i'm a cis guy in my late 20s and i've been on estrogen for over a year to try and get rid of my autogynephilia. i've been growing my hair longer and getting laser for my facial hair.my agp has mostly gone away but i still sometimes get aroused imagining myself as a woman so it's not perfecti know i'm making a huge mistake and i don't want to appropriate what real trans people go through but i also don't want to stop taking estrogen as i do feel better mentally and physically can someone just tell me i'm a freak and a potential threat to trans women's rights if i don't stop
>>42204415if you feel better mentally and physically on estrogen then just stay on it. as for like whether you do harm, just be kind and don't be malicious is the rule of thumb
>>42204428Are you trans? Am i a freak?
>>42204415i think you are a barely-repressed trans woman. take a step back and consider whether you truly want to live as a man for the rest of your life.
>>42204479nta but i am trans and you are not. the truth is that there is nothing wrong with being agp in the first place. do hrt and get laser if you want to. you are hurting no-one by doing things to make yourself happy.
>>42204503I don't enjoy living in general and i don't think being a man or trans woman would change that. Probably worse if i was a trans woman
>>42204512you are not [a freak]*, by the way.>>42204529but if you do not want to be trans you don't have to be trans. be a cis man on estrogen and look pretty and be agp. you're still a normal person. you are okay.
>>42204529>been on e to get rid of agp????Quitting porn probably would've been smarter
>>42204529well think it's a really bad idea to take estrogen as a cis man. i can't tell you if you're trans or not, but you should get off e if you decide you're cis. it won't "get rid of [your] autogynephilia". that makes no sense.
>>42204579i do feel better on it and the thought of having to stop taking it is scary so idk
>>42204479i am trans mtf. you're not a freak. it doesn't even really matter whether you're trans or not. all that really matters is accepting your true self and making changes that make your life better
>>42204875How do i even know what my true self is?
>>42204957what would make you happiest?
>>42204964Either a cis guy without agp or a cis woman
>>42204976well the agp is probably something you're just going to have to live with and i'm not sure you're going to become a cis woman. what then?
>>42204989I don't know. Just take estrogen and keep living as a shut in
>>42204957by experimenting, trying stuff out, exploring and seeing what you like ^^
>>42205010I've tried women's clothing but it just arouses me and reminds me of my agp
>>42204995so taking estrogen will make you happy. that's one actionable thing you can do: keep taking it. now you'll just have to learn to live with agp and decide how it feels best to present. take this slowly and let yourself learn what you enjoy, like >>42205010 said.
>>42205031boymoding is valid. i did for years because i couldn't stand to wear anything made for women. you'll grow into it
>>42204415take your pills Alice
>>42204415Sounds like the avg manmoder experience desu. I do the same and probably fall under the trans umbrella by definition but I don’t go around wearing a dress and demanding people call me a woman.
>>42205093Do you have agp?
>>42205129Yeah, definitely greatly reduced with HRT though
>>42205138Are you agp and trans or trans because of agp?
>>42205158I’m a believer that agp is just a type of gender dysphoria that happens to be related to sexuality. Maybe that’s a cope, maybe not, so I guess I’m trans “because of agp” in a way.
>>42204415I have severe unending agp for years, should I do what you're doing? should I become a full blown troon? should I continue to repress? I'm lost, help me agp bro
>>42205188I don’t have all the answers. I went back and forth for years myself, quit HRT a few times. Tried all the repper strats too before that. Probably just depends on how strong your agp is vs your other desires in life. Like if you have kids and a wife and mild agp, it might not be worth transitioning. Idk, right now I’m content on manmoding, at least I know I won’t get more masculine.
>>42205188how old and when did your agp start?mine started around 12 and it's been like 15 years and has only made me hate being a man more and more which made me start hrt
>>42204415how have you not grown tits yet and been outed at work? i want to transition so bad but i have a fucking professional job in a woman dominated field and id feel like such a freak if they found out i was growing tits.
>>42205278i just hide them with clothes and posture
>>42204415You're not a freak, you're not "appropriating" anything by doing laser/taking hormones. You're just as trans as anyone else here, don't be a pussy, if you want to troon out just do it. Lots of mtfs (including myself) have all the same insecurities early on the impostor syndrome fades with time
>>42205249started 13, 28 now. I guess I don't hate being a man but if I looked like a girl I'd transition tomorrow. I have the gigachad meme for a face, not even ffs could solve.
>>42205333yeah bro i feel the same about my face and appearance
>>42205295do your breasts give you gender dysphoria, if you're still technically manmoding? I feel like the man mode status can only last so long until it creeps into tranner territory. Enlighten me.
>>42205329too much of a pussy, trooning is inherently shameful and embarrassing and goes against my personality
>>42205366well i feel uncomfortable when i'm around people and have to modify the way i move but when i'm alone i like how they look on my body
>>42205390ok so THIS sounds like trans speak, no lie. and I'm trying to give OP a chance with the hrt manmoding concept but it really seems to be sliding into something more.
>>42205400what makes you say that?
>>42205427for some reason you differentiated yourself from "real trans women." Yet you're taking the steps and those steps make you happy. Your reason for going on e or doing whatever isn't invalidated by your motivation. People transition for all sorts of reasons. Yours is just as valid as anyone else here.
>>42205439because i'm not a "i'm a girl inside and knew when i was 5" trans person, i developed agp later
>>42205459yes but "I'm a girl and knew when I was 5" is just a fraction of the types of journeys people take. You may feel like a lateshit but people transition far later--again, for different reasons--and are equally valid, as is everyone else's journey.
>>42205483if diy didn't exist i wouldn't be on hrt. i wouldn't get it through a gender clinic because i wouldn't meet the criteria and i wouldn't make the effort to lie and get it
>>42205507you'd rather live with significant agp for the rest of your life than make a modest effort at a GC? doubt
>>42205536put another way, if hrt didn't exist at all i wouldn't ever entertain the idea of using clothes and makeup and voice to try and make people think i'm a woman
>>42205536Reppers going to rep.
