i feel guilty for being more attracted to the guy i had a crush on before getting with my current bf. honestly i kinda felt like me and him would have been a great fit, and he would even do stuff like gender me female to strangers when i literally can't bring myself to ask other people to do that myself. it also seemed like he just really understood me and would talk about feelings with me and all that faggy stuff. He wasn't ready for a relationship though and pushed me away, so i moved on and am with a new guy who i do like, but i feel bad that i think the first guy was better personality wise and also was hotter. is there a way to make myself obsessed with my current bf so i stop thinking about the other guy? it's not like a have a huge dating pool as a tranny in a fairly rural area and i don't want to lose what i've got
aw damn im not sure what advice to give you. I was in the same situation and ended a pseudo relationship (situationship/dating in everything but name) cus it felt unfair to the guy to think thoughts like that and he deserves someone who only thinks about him. that's how it was for me though but if you're fully happy with your bf and don't feel like you're settling even a bit thats fine
>>42208196>don't feel like you're settling even a bitthis is what i'm worried about, like i don't know if i feel like i'm settling or not. like, things were clearly not okay with the first guy, like it was also something like a pseudo relationship that i was making happen because i really wanted one and he didn't want one quite so much but couldn't bring himself to just flat out cut things off and instead kept things non committal and not really exclusive. it's like i'm trading up some qualities and down some others, and i don't know if i'm being fair or not. the thing is, i don't think i'd be able to find another partner if i ended things here, and i don't want to be the forever alone tranny or only be with guys who will just get sex and leave. like, i feel like he could just go be with a real girl instead of me who keeps thinking about someone else a lot of the time. like if he's gonna be with a tranny he at least deserves one who cares only about him
>>42208329I don't know. I think if you like your current partner you're gonna have to accept that the other guy obviously didn't like you enough to pick you and date you so he's already not the boyfriend you want cus he won't commit to you or reciprocate your energy and space at all. you just have to reality check yourself that the guy you want is in your head. im not gonna say your standards are unreasonable cus they don't seem to be. you're in a rural area which is unfair for anyone in terms of options. whether you still feel something is missing with your bf after you get over the other guy is a separate issue imo. but maybe you plan to move one day, somewhere with more people and support, and then you might feel a lot less like what you're describing. in the right places there's a lot of people who will love you without shame so sorry about your spawn point
