I'm straight and I don't know how to tactfully handle advances from gay men and I don't have any self-esteem or confidence and I just let people walk over me. Like it's really, really bad; this enthusiastic young gay man came up to me on the street and said I was very handsome and asked me if he could do my hair, so being completely spineless and abandoning myself, I just keep saying yes and I only sort of put up boundaries when he asks to hold my hand. I met this stranger like 30 seconds ago and I'm letting them touch me, what the fuck? What's the script for politely shooting down this guy? I even gave him my phone number because I was so anxious about making him feel bad.I have no social skills and I'm clinically depressed so I don't have strong feelings about things and I'm passive in the face of potential danger.If you're curious, the gay men who have approached me were shorter than me and have all exuded "catcher" vibes, unless I'm just homophobic and assuming as such.In case you're smutbrained about this, I'm a 3 - 4/10 5'8" clinically autistic shut-in unemployed virgin guy, I am absolutely not getting laid ever and these gay men who approach me aren't conventionally attractive, I just want to keep my peace but I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I just want to be left alone and I'm absolutely not attracted to men and if this sort of thing keeps happening eventually I'm going to get raped or traumatized somehow.
>>42238570Man of all the things that never happened this never happened the absolute most
my suggestion would be to violently attack them in the form of a homophobic hate crime, but if you're too much of a pussy to do that you need to start screaming slurs at them until they leave you alone
>>42238570>sorry i have a girlfriend
>>42238600>>42238601Can you please help me? This is real, this has happened to me twice now, and this 2nd time I really failed to put up boundaries immediately because I was so anxious about not hurting this person's feelings because I already don't have much of anything to offer people so I'm very concerned about keeping my peace. I'm not trying to sow discord, I just don't have any gay friends that I can ask about this. Can you please trust me >>42238640I already told him or implied I'm single.
>>42238640But thank you for the advice, I'll try that next time this happens. I don't know how to express or take inventory of my emotions so I can't express them and if I try to put up boundaries I feel that, since I am genuinely autistic and socially feeble, if I tried to be straightforward about it I would come off as cold or mean and then the situation would catastrophize from that point
>>42238684Well you need to realize they just want something from you, your interactions with people should be business-orientated, and you do not want to do business with them. You've got this whimsical idea that we're living in an actual society where feelings matter lol, certainly not to most people you come across.
>>42238776I don't know how to be mean. I'm afraid of saying no. I'm afraid that umrequited love will turn into resentment that is weaponized against me.
Bump. Is it possible to salvage this platonically or what should I do to intelligently resolve this. I've never felt an emotional connection to another person and I push everyone away out of fear and doubt.
>>42238570Thanks for the new fetish. Now I want a socially feeble man to bulldoze. Also, if someone is doing something you don't like and the "threat" is vague, move things to literal terms, ask them directly what they're doing to you and why so that they can admit they like you so you can say you're taken or straight. If they're evasive and say they were doing nothing, tell them it felt like they were hitting on you and you're not open to that
>>42239142>>42241207>and I push everyone away out of fear and doubt.I'm not saying be mean, just recognize that it's more impersonal than you think, even something like love is very fleeting. Do what you just said you do bro
