> be me> 21 yr depression & anxiety infused boymoder 2 yr hrt> live in fairly rural area> look like a young feminine boy> maybe a woman if you squint really hard and if you know im trans and if you're trying to be nice to me> live with parents that dont like that im trans but have learned to live with it ig> do college online (was in person before but isolated myself going Insane for three years so this is it now)> going to therapy, have to drive to the closest city to get there, at least it's really accepting of lgbt stuff> my mom invited me to this market thing in the park after therapy> i love exploring them and trying to see all the beautiful things and all the stories behind them> in the waiting room> i get really scared in waiting rooms or i guess in public in general> it feels like everyone is looking at me and hating me because all my insecurities are correct and they know about them> a girl walks in, ive seen her a few times in the waiting room> she always smiles and waves at me when she comes in> she probably hates me> the lady behind the desk tells me"Nona you can go back."> get up and scurry off, terrified everytime when they use my real name> i feel stupid for giving them that name> i look like a guy> everyone there definitely finds me to be so stupid> the hallway to the office is long, long florescent lights from the low ceiling beat down on you> therapy happens> it doesnt help, it feels like everytime she says something nice i have to tell myself she's wrong and actually hates me> leave > drive to the park> meet my mom when i get there> she says shes happy i came> shes drinking wine> have a general ick with alcohol so i leave to go walk around> a lot of the stands are older things being sold> tons of tents and trucks parked behind the stands with dusty stuff in it> lots of old people here, they look like they're seeing through me when they look at me, it's scary> the same girl from the waiting room is here
>>42377404> oh no> she sees me> she gets a smile on her face and waves, walking over to me> shes a bit taller than me"Hey! I didn't expect to see you here, what's your name?""oh um hi, it's Anon""uh. Well hi! I'm Marybel, wanna walk around together?""uh sure!"> we explore the market together> she's actually so nice as we walk around> we're just casually talking so easily> talking about stuff we like, her job, my school"So you just decided to come here? Didn't take you for doing this kind of stuff""oh um im here with my mom, are you here with anyone?""nah I don't see my family much anymore and I just like seeing what they have""oh um why?""Gay"> what"w- what""I tried to being a girl home and it didn't go well""OH i'm sorry i didn't realize i'm sorry that happened"> she laughs a little"Shit happens"> we passed by an old game stand i really want to go to but i dont want to be a gross man thing obsessing over video games and stuff> she sees it"Oh let's stop here for a second!"> end up stopping there for way longer than a second> she was just curious but im sitting here enamored by an snes> the seller says they couldn't get it to turn on and i REALLY want to buy it> manage to whittle down the price to $30 because it's dirty and doesn't turn on> i'm totally gonna repair this thing"i'm gonna repair this thing it's gonna be so awesome :)""That's nice you look happy"> she's smiling at me and i'm unironically enjoying myself wow> we leave the stand and there isn't much else that is interesting"This was nice! I wanted to talk to you before, but didn't really have the chance to, can I get your number?""oh um yeah!"> exchange info"Alright I'll see you later!"> she waves to me and runs off> that was so nice> go try to find my mom and go home
>>42377409>ffw two nights later> get a text from her> she invites me out to the movies> agree and we meet at one with mini golf> do mini golf together enjoying ourselves"The winner has to buy the other a slushy""ok!"> she beats me so easily> have to buy her a slushy..> the movie is really good> we spend another hour together talking about it and the characters till we're kicked out the theater and go home> it's so nice having a friend i get along with so much> shes so cool and smart and strong and pretty> ffw the next night> sitting in bed rotting> staring at the popcorn ceiling watching the bumps of it twist into images> get a text from her"Hey wanna grab food? I've got a break soonish if you wanna come hang out, I've gotta discount""yeah sure!"> drive 30 minutes to her> probably broke a few traffic laws on the way> she works at a burger fast food place, not that one but the other one> walk in and she sees me immediately> shes smiling> order a burger and mozzarella sticks and she gives me the employee discount> we sit at a booth together munching on food> she giggles at my stupid rambling about the food, and tells me i'd think it's terrible if i worked there a day> she more reserved than before though> she's tired> i should ask if she's okay"are you okay?""yeah just a bit tired, i'm probably gonna go smoke after this"> sit there frozen for a second not that happy that she does smoke> i guess im a bitch i shouldnt judge her im just scared> just respond normally freak"yeah!"> she sighs> she reaches into her pocket for a cigarette"You wanna come with?""yeah sure!"
>>42377416> we are both leaning against a hard brick wall> i sort of like the texture> the bricks arent flat, they're jagged and feel nice> she lights up her cigarette> it's nice watching the smoke fade into the darkness> there's not much to say we're just looking at the stars not obscured by the street lights> her off hand brushes against mine> it feels nice> it's not intentional though it's just an accident, why would you ever think it's nice you creep> look at the ground, im so stupid> my hand twitches into hers> what the fuck is wrong with you> why would you touch her like that you freak> she takes another puff of the cigarette then grabs my hand, intertwining our fingers> oh my god oh my god oh my god> what's going on what oh my god is she doing this on purpose, is this to hurt me, she's going to hate me after this, her hand is so soft and nice and i feel like im in heaven> she takes another puff of her cigarette then puts it out on the trash can"Hey I've got to go back to work, but I'll see you later Nona"> she smiles and winks> im stuck frozen in place slumped against the wall> she knew my real name> she's> she's so dreamy
>>42377416>mini golfgayest thing ittgood for you though op
>>42377430yeah :)
unbelievably cute. got my eyes watery and all.
That’s so great. Please more I need it!
>>42377404>>42377409>>42377416>>42377417moot didnt create 4chan so you can post your pedophile fanfiction. people like you should be bullied to death
>>42377404she's just like me fr fri need more .. .. . . it's so good q_qplease q_q
