this is the gen for trans people who pass every day. not a place for chasers to collect photos for their Folder, or a place for repressors to talk about shoulders. this is a place to talk about the mechanics of passing, and how to exist in a cis world as a trans person because of federal overreach, true "stealth" is >>qott when was the first time you passed? how did you feel?
>>42377940>no posts at least the current state of the board is honest
>>42377940Back in like 2012 was when I first passed it was good but I let my voice slip since I was still training and only 3 months hrt and the guy that was flirting with me had a sudden shocked look and disengaged lmao
>>42377940>qottIIRC Spring 2021ish? Was getting burritos, about 7 months on. Had gotten a balayage at that point and finished laser but only a bit of voice training. Using washroom, get told off, get miss'd by the older lady beside me>Personal Question.How do yall deal with trying to stop 'locker room talk' or people shittalking trans shit generally without getting at least a tiny bit upset or weird? Last week a friend group of mine was shittalking an acquintance that is kind of a cishon and joking about checking her Birth Certificate and the whole 'maybe shes one of them you never know' and i felt really gross and dipped early? How do yall deal?
>>42379830Honestly I just smile and nod I don’t want to draw any attention to myself,but for me this really only comes up with online friends since I live in California where I’ve legit never ran into issues irl even when I was early on
>>42379855But if it gets really bad?I'm in/friends with the old money conservative soon-to-be wine and book club types so thats who they are. Fun and cozy! but obviously sometimes judgemental
>>42379885Honestly I’ve never experienced it really bad I avoid conflict I’m a very harmless person so I’d probably just be nervous but also smile and nod. I’m not gonna lie and act like I’m some big tough girl that would stand up.
>>42377940>qottnot sure tbhonky since the first couple of years on hrt all sorta blend in for me due to other health issues i had. ik my friend's mom thought i was a cis woman despite first meeting her when i was on hrt for a week but im not counting that since she wasn't sure. one i definitely remember is onboarding with a new therapist when i mentioned i was trans. she thought i was a closeted ftm and i had to explain it a couple of times to her and she muttered "you pass very well".
>>42380042Ive had times like that with Dr's and its always kinda embaressing like even if people mean it genuinely it makes me feel embaressed and like they're just being nice
>>42380164wait nooo like i recently fucked up my thumb while cutting up some frozen butter and when i went to the doctors they asked when my last period was and i felt so embarrassed explaining that i didn't get periods and she gave me this weird confused look until i had to say that im trans it was so humiliating lol
>>42380210similar issue here. Because was a groin related issue, had to go through about 5 explainations of being trans and intersex, each time nobody believing me or transmitting it forward and me feeling like a fucking monster each time i was asked>Where are you at on your period>Have you checked to see if youre pregnant>When was your last period>Are you sure you're not pregnantand finally during ultrasound>hey you were born a girl right? I'm not seeing ...
>>42377940About a month ago I passed at the liquor store, until I opened my mouth lol. It turns out that having a clocky head is something even CIS women have and no one really thinks about it too much. I was wearing a turtle neck to hide my adams apple and must have possessed a feminine aura. Nonetheless I have a deep voice and training to do a deep fem voice is hard. The liquor store clerk greeted me as mam and when I responded it was over. I think another 6 months of voice training will be necessary for me to ever attempt to talk to a man in public again.
>>42380210I think being in California they’ve seen enough people like me once I explain no I don’t get periods blah blah blah they at least have an idea of what’s going on.I remember before I lost weight getting asked how far along my pregnancy was by some women and it was so embarrassing like bless you I love that you think I can have kids and a mix of holy shit I need to lose weight
i’m pretty sure i stealth pass? it’s only ever miss/maam in public, and a few days ago i was at a run wearing a women’s number and there weren’t any children’s authors going apeshit about it, and even sweaty in running gear with no makeup and my hair tied up i got gendered correctly 100% of the time so i think that means i must pass? but then passgen says im a hon so who’s to know
>>42381290Then you pass ignore what 4 Chan retards say
>>42381309i do try to but they’ve successfully drilled it into me that any time i get gendered female it’s a pitypass, coming to this website was a mistake but it’s too late now
>>42380525im in pennsylvania and there's definitely trans people where i live. but when someone thinks of a trans person, they typically think of some ogrehon with some large protruding beer gut crashing out over pronouns. not like a regular ass person, so that helps a lot with me passing/stealthing irl, even if it does add a bit of shock value when ppl find out.
>>42381409yknow hons spend a lot of time complaining about transphobic propaganda trying to put it in everyone’s head that that’s what all trans people look like, but i think it does kinda work in our favour in the way that they assume if you’re not a delusional it’s ma’am tier ogrehon you couldn’t possibly be trans
>>42381409I guess they might just move along I know I thought those people were what we were like when I was a kid and that held me off on transitioning.
>>42377940>>qottThe first time I passed I was picking up lunch to eat with my grandparents. I felt really excited and surprised but I had to go back to being a “grandson” right after so it was bitter sweet. These days I pass, I thought I was stealth but i honestly am not sure anymore. I got clocked for the first time in two years by some guy a few months ago and it destroyed my confidence. But I also decided to come out to a few cis friends I trust this month and none of them knew I was trans. When I came out they thought I was pre transition ftm and were asking if i was going to start testosterone. So idk if that counts as 100% stealth but I guess I can pass to most people just not the expert tranny sleuths.
>>42377940im mostly stealth now. i was friends with a crazy fundie girl and she told me, to my face, that she doesn't believe you can change your gender. she also invited me to go to church with her. never realized i was trans lol>>42381440this is my experience as well
What do you girls do with dating? I was with a man for a long time and the relationship is just dead he started ignoring me so I'm trying to figure out how to find guys again.
>>42380396voice training is the last piece of the puzzle and if you can get halfway there you will pass 100% of the time
>>42381323if you pass in real life you pass, passgen is just /hotornot/ and im tired of pretending otherwise. if there /are/ other stealth girlies on here i want a place to talk where there arent a bunch of assholes floating around
>>42385988no yeah i like this gen so far bc passgen is just a thinly veiled chaser thirst thread and talking to other trannies is hard bc ppl act so bitter and jealous towards me for just existing. it's nice having a place where i can talk about being trans without all of the chaser thirsting and bitterhons. you don't see that very often :)
>>42381323i'm the same i honestly don't know if there's a difference between passing and pity passing any more living in Seattle, let alone stealth. 4 years HRT, FFS, BA, voice training etc and i don't get misgendered but i'm so fucking brainwormed that i think a cis woman giving me any sort of compliment is an indication i'm not passing. i don't know if people are looking at me because i'm attractive or because they're clocking me or because they just happen to be looking at me.the worst is that i'm convinced this mindset is a self fulfilling prophecy, i think i am clocky therefore i am, fuck my stupid tranny life
>>42377940im a cissexual woman who identifies as trans and i can confirm i pass 100% of the time>>42379687KEKKKK
>>42377940How do you guys know if you're stealth? I haven't been misgendered in years (although I feel like people here don't usually say like sir/mam anyway). I don't bring up being trans to other people, and they don't say anything about it to me. My main friend group is all ppl who know i'm trans since I went to school with them, and I don't interact with heaps of people outside that super often. I feel like my voice isn't great, though my (trans) friends say it passes.I was staying in a hostel w some girls I didn't know last year for a political event, and they changed in front of each other and i felt like such a "invader in women's spaces" though idk if that means they didn't know or everyone there was just super woke
>>42386233I’ve had several things to know despite insecurities I pass, guys hit on me, women get changed or shower in front of me without batting an eye, I’ve been asked when my last period was by drs, I’ve had friends say things along the lines of when you get pregnant
>>42377940the only time i truly felt like i had passed and not just pity passed was when i was in the psych ward after a suicide attempt. me and a few other women were hanging around the lounge area in the evening and i made a joke about an ex boyfriend of mine being trans and how i was straight with extra steps (cringe ik). one of the ladies gave a "huh?? what's the extra step?" and i said "oh, because i'm trans too", and she said "OH oh my gosh i didn't know"i looked like shit in sweats and a sweater and no makeup and horrible hair (bc psych ward) so it was hopefuel... and i still remember it over a year lateranother passing story from that stay in the psych ward was talking in group about how i felt like a bitch for saying it, but it hurts and upsets me seeing some of you doing better and having hope after being here an even shorter time than me, like it feels like i'm just broken when the healing process works for you guys or maybe you're just better at faking it so you can get out of here sooner. and the guy who spoke after me said something like "pardon the term but it took balls to say that" which i feel would be insane to say to a trans woman (but then again i was literally in the psych ward so)
Stealth for over a decade and then got outed to my regular GP, who handles mundane shit like antibiotics, by the government's new central medical document system because it secretly kept sex at birth on record and now made it visible to everyone who has access. Literally, what was the point of changing my birth certificate? Does anyone have any luck with fake ID's and using that to start a fresh record.
>>42386065>i think a cis woman giving me any sort of compliment is an indication i'm not passingIt's common way for cis women to make friends between each other, compliment hair, nails, etc. Seen it said to other cis women so it's not a clocking thing for sure.
