fuck being unlovable, fuck allllllllll of whats happening. whats great is im not even having an episode, i just genuinely dont even care anymore. im gonna jerk off and listen to mommy asmr, who gives a shit. yippie!!

>>42388992
Real.

not an airport nigga you dont gotta announce your departure

You surely are worth loving, all it takes is to find you a sensible partner to help you gtfo wherever you are, and you can make it an eventual certainty.

>>42390934
Not OP but what if I don't even have the will it takes to find a partner? Like how every hydrocarbon wants to be CO2 and H2O but they need oxygen and a spark, and I'm like diesel in the sense it'll take a lot to get me burning.

>>42390988
I mean, obviously it is a very emotionally exhausting process, for everyone, even many normies (unless all they care for is unga bunga pump and dump). It's not a one step thing. First you try to do a bit more than survive (clean a bit of room each day, leave house, cook anything), then you make some friends you force yourself to talk to nigh daily, then force yourself to do things that you have some aptitude for or interest in and see what friendships could develop into something more romantic. Basically you get the energy for the big steps from rigging your surroundings in ways that incrementally make you wanna die less.

>>42391027
Oh god.

>>42391080
It's less scary than it sounds, really.
Like, the entire point is, if the next step you can think of is too daunting? You are thinking too big. Incrementalism is the entire point. It's a massive relief actually because it means that if something overwhelms you there is most likely something else you should be doing first that doesn't.

>>42391103
I've tried it all short of a relationship. The only things that have changed are I'm unmedicated and free of a toxic friend group. It seems so pointless.