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Apart from the GOTT, here are a few things you can do _today_ to make your life a little better. Keep a diary and write down every success. Some you may do as often as you please, but write down each one individually! You deserve it! Do not feel pressured to do all, but feel free to select one or two!

- prepare 1 load of laundry
- do 1 load of laundry
- read one page of a book or manga you have been putting off
- cook yourself a meal, or try learn to make a simple dish
- eat a meal
- pick up items on the floor for 5 minutes
- make your bed
- if you have a bad habit, try making it more inconvenient (putting things in hard to reach places for example)
- do the dishes for 3 minutes
- write down one thing you are grateful for (from abstract things to something like a cute image you saw)
- Clean up 1m^2 of your floor (~40x40 in)
- Open your window for 10-20 minutes
- try to exercise for 5 min (walk outdoors, walking stairs, whatever you wish)
- take out the trash
- drink a glass of water
- put one item of trash in the bin
- reach out to an online contact
(perhaps even try arrange spontaneously meeting up with an IRL contact near you!)
- BONUS: Repeat a goal to hit a milestone (1 book chapter rather than a page, the laundry pile, the floor of one room, etc)


Unofficial group chats maintained by kind anons of /sig/:
IRC: presently defunct afaik.
Discord: https://discord.gg/pUuXdBjKX2

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Please check the last thread for responses if you haven't yet, and remember https://archived.moe/ allows you to check out posts that 404'd.
Goodnight everyone!

>>42721906
Sweet dreams to you too, anon(ette).

im fake
even mybest friend saidim a performative tranny
a fake
she is right
i knew it already
oh well
gn

Me and my boyfriend had a fight, I said something that saddened him and now he hasn't been online since.

>>42721855
Anon, I get you are trying to be helpful but this is kind of shit. Doing dishes for 3 minutes? Working out for 5 minutes? Only pick up the clutter on the floor for 5 minutes? What on earth?
I lost around 100lbs a few years ago and have kept it off. You just gotta do it and do it fully. There are people who will say
>AH EXERCISE AND I CANT BE LOSIN WEIGHT
because they "bettered" themselves by taking a 5 minute walk and they are stunned it didn't do anything.

IDK man, if people want to improve, they should aim high instead of doing nothing and feeling good about it. Good luck to everyone tho

i dont wanna improve
i want something awful to happen to me
i hope everyone feels abd after that
even though most will get over it after 2 years or so
nobody cares
and i dont care about anyone

>>42722259
I think the point of the OP copypasta is to encourage people to start small so they don’t get overwhelmed, not that all the self care you’ll ever need to do can be done in five minutes a day.

>>42722281
It sounds to me like you feel like other people don’t realize how much you’re hurting right now because your pain is private. You want that pain to be externalized and perceived by other people. You want to feel like people know what you’re going through.

But there are ways to feel seen and have your pain understood by others that don’t depend on you getting hurt.

I think a good place to start is to put how you’re feeling into words. What do you want people to know about how you feel?

I believe the benefit of putting our own feelings into words is often underestimated. We know what it’s like to be us, why bother trying to describe it? But getting something off your chest can help. If you’re describing how you feel, you aren’t just feeling it, and that makes those feelings a bit more manageable.

I realize that this is kind of abstract, but I hope it helps.

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I ordered some Sheertex tights and they came today. I also learned that I should have gotten a pedicure before I bought tights because the edges of my toenails were catching on them. I do clip my toenails but I haven’t been filing them.

If this just makes me sound like a brick, whatever. I’m posting it here because there’s a decent enough chance someone reading it will find it helpful. Pedicures aren’t just performative bullshit, they reduce friction when putting on legwear.

>>42721252
>I hope it was thoroughly enjoyable.
yeah, and there was enough to eat the next day even. the dishes are not being done though.
>it sounds like you are doing better now!
not really... my suicide thoughts are turning into murder thoughts as well, nihilism and solipsism are invading my brain like a plague. i feel like nothing i can do will ultimately matter, and way too much of things that i would like to change are out of my reach. for example, one of my best friends got a deportation order (in europe, mind you) and had to flee the country, and there's nothing i can do. i will have to quit my job, i might fail uni, and i will be likely to get a worse paying job, which means i won't be able to afford a psychiatrist and thus won't be able to get prescriptions. and besides, i am starting to feel like my health only matters to doctors so that i can be a "productive member of society", working long and hard to earn money for someone else. i feel like going without any drugs or medicine is a more real way to live. even though it's exhausting and overwhelming, at least it's honest, and i'm facing it directly unlike some of the people (especially trans people) i know that try to numb it with hedonism, hard drugs and sex. i still feel like suicide would be the ultimate protest against alienation and conditions of modern life.
at least nihilism made me ask myself not just "why live" but also "why die". considering i don't have access to a gun, it might not be worth the trouble. i'm getting very schoppenhauer-pilled at the same time though.
>Things are getting better.
that's good to hear! hope it keeps going that way and that your plan succeeds.

i forgot to mention - i have a prescription for antipsychotics, 50 more tablets, and i'll get back on them just so that i'd be able to say i'm doing better.

doing my best* fuck i'm stupid

>>42726234
same

weekend!!
finally
time for a nice meal

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>>42721843
anyone know how to stop feeling so bad about how you look as a tranny? i’ve been on hrt for over two years now and i feel like i’ve been spinning my wheels for the last year and a half. i remember feeling terrible about the fact that someone here looked so much better than me but i could cope then cause they’d been on for so much longer than i had. and now here i am, nowhere near where they were at this point in their transitions. i’m not terribly ugly, and i am a little androgynous (still clearly male though), but i feel like any progress i make is meaningless. gaining weight goes largely to my core. losing weight would make me more gaunt than i already am. i’ve done 9 sessions of laser hair removal and still have an obvious shadow above my lip. not even to mention things i have less control over like facial features i’d need ffs (which i can’t afford for the foreseeable future) to fix. alternatively advice on coming out to a therapist while looking and sounding like a man and how i could possibly explain my issues without seeming crazy or like i’m complaining about nothing would also be appreciated

>>42729941
as wit heverything in life u just need to distract yourself 24/7 or find something elset hat gives u purpose and self esteem unrelated to ur appearacnme and social reception

bump

>>42729941
It sounds like all you’ve done is HRT and laser. Are you boymoding? There’s a lot you can do to improve your appearance that’s down to simple self-presentation. If you aren’t ready to socially transition, start researching clothes, hair, makeup and skincare. The vast majority of women aren’t gifted with ideal features and proportions, and use style to even things out. It doesn’t all come down to genetics, hormones and surgery. You have a lot of tools that you’re discounting.

As for coming out to a therapist, my advice is ask your therapist if they feel willing and able to support you through a gender transition, and if not, ask to be referred to someone who can.

>>42721843
Medication is wrong

>>42721843
Get a job. Stop being nearly homeless. Get back on Ritalin

>>42720904
>I'm glad to hear! I hope the weekend talk will be just as productive
I hope so as well, it will be done Sunday due to busyness.

>I'm working on it, yeah. It's getting better bit by bit, things will likely be smooth sailing come April. And curtains close by December
I'm glad you are keeping hopeful and determined regarding all current struggles.

Thank you for all of your advice and help, we appreciate all that you do for us.

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>>42730019
i don’t want to keep being unhappy and just distracting myself to stop the pain, i want to live for once
>>42731809
>Are you boymoding?
yeah, you got me there
>clothes, hair, makeup and skincare
hair and skincare are fair points, i do try but i could be doing better. my concern with clothes and makeup are that they don’t fundamentally change my appearance. after everything is removed i’d still end up not looking the way i want. but typing this now i realize that it’s a very defeatist “if i can’t improve my entire life i shouldn’t even try to improve individual aspects of it” way of thinking. which is obviously a little silly. thank you for the advice

>>42687748
>I suppose because he sees any sort of concession/disagreement as fundamental opposition?
Yes, that has to be it.

He can't even take a question from me without saying that I 'chose your mother's side'.

For God's sake, I've been covering for him more often than I should. He's a confusing person, I don't know how to feel about him.
He's becoming more and more unreliable to speak to and I don't know what to do about him.
He keeps reminding me how he can just cut me off as his offspring.

>From everything I have heard so far, I diagnose that option with a bad case of "fuck that"
It's really scary to think about, it feels like the would is closing in on me.
I need to figure something out, I can't keep waiting for somebody to save me.

>All the best, bunon
Thank you.

>>42732301
Are you referring to me?

>>42732618
>thank you for the advice
Glad I could help! You see what I’m saying. You and I both know that cosmetic stuff isn’t a cure-all, but finding something that gives you a sense of control can make how you feel about your looks a lot easier to deal with.

Pg10

>>42721843
Any tips for fixing up a FUCKED hairline?

>>42736045
nah

>>42736045
depends, there's surgery, finasteride, minox
uh
try in reverse order

>>42736045
legit just save the money and get a hair transplant
>t. spent years using various topicals, microneedling, medications, etc

>>42732618
mice are so cute

I should get more money

>>42740699
me too, sister

>>42738198
this. this so much.

>>42722000
gn
please take care

>>42722205
What did you say, Anon?

I am so fucking tired, it's not even funny.

Good night

>>42745188
Nighty night

>>42729941
Honest answer: make peace with yourself.
You will never be a woman.
Settle this in your mind, scream and cry about it for hours if needed, but it's imperative that you understand that.
When this part is done (and a good half of trans don't manage to do it, so don't be too hard on yourself if it takes time) you know understand that you are a man.
You will have to accept yourself now.
Knowing what you are is the imperative first step, accepting who you are the second.
Ok, you are a man and you want to look like a woman as deep as possible.
No problem, let's work with that.
Look for the physical differences between men and women.
Some, you won't care, some will be really important to you.
So try to define what your perfect woman body would be.
Dor moe, breast is the more important, for other it's the face, etc. Fond what defines a woman for you. Your own definition.
You will always be a man, but you can change some part of your body to look like a woman.
But as easy as body wise, a surgery can turn into an infection, mind wise, taking hrt without first accepting who you are is the fastest way to lose it.
And that's why suicide is so high, because trans didn't take the time to do the mind work on themselves before starting to modify their mind and body.
To be who you want to be, you first need to know who you are, and what you want to be.

>>42730019
The first part is a very bad advice. Lying to yourself is the best way to rope yourself in some years when pressure becomes too high and you can't lie to yourself or "look elsewhere".
Second part is good. It's always good to develop yourself.

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>>42747315
kys nigger

>>42743621
Ain't we all?

>>42721906
I wonder if there will ever be another Skullgirlz.

>>42749056
Not from the same studio, that's for sure.
I'm sure somebody is dreaming up a spiritual successor though

pg10 btw

i lost 10 pounds since new years and started brushing my teeth twice a day!!!

replies tomorrow, probably

>>42687748
lowkey pretty proud of myself for this. BUT I GOT INVITED TO A PARTY I HUNG OUT WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE GOT DRUNK WITH THEM AND WE ALL HAD FUN!!! okay yes maybe a bit of an overreaction but i'm very happy!! i think i'm starting to get the hang of talking to people!?

as always love you all /sig/mas <3 sending virtual hugs and kisses ⊂((・▽・))⊃

>>42751983
take your time, its ok

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>>42751983
Thank you very much, we hope you are doing well.

Take your time and take care overall.

>>42731872
Any medication at all?
Or are we talking specifics?

Your thread sucks. Sorry.

>>42753633
*spits a big purple glob of gunk on your shoes* sorry im sorry *does it again* whoops

>>42753681
i told you not to chew on all those grapes, you never actually eat them after you're done

my brain doesn't work and I could use help from someone who understands autism and emotions and masking. but i dont want to type it out and feed the rumination
look at everything with softness, and maybe we'll get somewhere

ok i cant help myself. I get really hung up on abstract needs I don't know how to meet. I write a bunch of schizoish fragments about it and my thoughts dont even make sense to me, but there's like a lot emotional energy captured in it.

and usually around the same time I get a lot of thoughts about things im unhappy with in my life: this time my femininity, my relationships, how i express myself, and how i lack motivation and dont pursue what really interests me.

I could say more but i think its all a lot to do with my big personality problems. i turn over the same ideas and dont know how to move on and put things into action. i have to understand things perfectly and i develop compulsions to ruminate that keep me from exploring or processing anything new. and its like a microcosm of the things that make me unhappy in my life (which i tend to think about at the same time as these episodes): I'm too scared to fully express myself, discouraged from chasing or allowing people to know my real needs, and Im not really creatively engaged in my interests. I don't take leaps.

its kinda like i just let my brain bully me and *I* dont decide anything. but idk. idk if this is anything real to be upset about.
I just have bursts of like WAIT i CAN fix all this shit in my life. and then its gone because i try too hard to understand the feeling instead of acting on it and making it stick

ok sorry for the annoying autism rant. i think writing that out helped a bit. as much as i hate to say it i think asking people to pay attention to my stupid shit calms me down a bit

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Rare morning train post.
>>42721962
Thank you, Anon!
>>42722000
Sounds like you had a rough one.. how do you feel now?
>>42722259
Like the other Anon said, those units are specifically for people who are at the "struggling to get out of bed" stage of things. Slow but steady escalation is part of it all, of course. But it can be immensely self destructive to start off with expectations of what they need to do. Self loathing killing motivation and leading to people rotting away is a much greater risk here in my experience than complacency.
>>42722205
Have you had a chance to talk since? If not, what was it about roughly?
>>42726213
>42726230
>the dishes are not being done though.
I don't know if it is something you struggle with but I personally found it helpful to aim to clean more items than I use on average. For example, when I go into the kitchen to grab a drink, I clean a fork or plate or something. With that kinda approach I rarely have more than one or two dirty dishes around.
>suicide thoughts are turning into murder thoughts as well
Murder? Someone in particular making your life miserable?
>, nihilism and solipsism are invading my brain like a plague.
Do you find it to correlate with the time of day, or your environment? Like, in my case I found things to weigh the most heavily on me when I was alone with my thoughts late at night.
I get the feeling of powerlessness. I do. I have seen people I love experience horrible, horrible things, just outside of my sphere of influence. Always when I could not be there in a way that mattered. It is a visceral kind of pain. I would be shaken to the core if I heard a friend of mine was at risk of being deported. I hope you have some contact you can reach them through for updates.. and with them nothing but the very best, and that this can be resolved somehow.
>i might fail uni
This is a fear we might be able to address together. Wanna walk me though your current struggles there?
(1/2)

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>>42726213
>>42726230
(2/2)
>i feel like going without any drugs or medicine is a more real way to live.
The thing is, you seem not to draw a distinction between escapism and alleviating suffering. My lived experience is that toughing things out rather than sustainably dealing with them with the tools you have is no less an escape than hedonism or anything else. "There is nothing noble about your suffering", I once read. I found the statement quite striking.
>suicide would be the ultimate protest against alienation
A change of perspective, perhaps: do you have people that can relate to your experiences around you, or do you feel alone in your alienation?
>that's good to hear! hope it keeps going that way and that your plan succeeds.
>i'll get back on them just so that i'd be able to say i'm doing my best.
That's good to hear, I genuinely hope they help. What is your general experience with them, anyhow? Like, I assume you can recall a before and after you were put on them.
>>42722281
Hm, do you have any people you consider friends or loved ones? What are your surroundings like? You sound terribly alone with your troubles. I would like to listen, at the very least.
>>42729941
I don't know how much I can usefully say about that as a cis guy, but from an outsider's perspective I do think boymoding seems to really egg on dysphoria and encourage BDDemon thoughts. That isn't to say people don't boymode for a reason, I understand that people fear being clocked or harassed (or worse) in public. But it's not a free defense mechanism, so to say? I can't know how your therapist will react but none of that makes you sound crazy. The only thing that you need to be mindful of is that your body image might be incongruent with what people see. One thing that seems to help people is to girlmode at home and around people they trust and care for.
>laser hair removal and still have an obvious shadow above my lip.
Would you say there is no progress at all with it? Or is it just slow?

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>>42732301
Wanna tell us more about your circumstances, Anon?
>>42732526
>>42732749
>I'm glad you are keeping hopeful and determined regarding all current struggles.
I can't say that it is easy, but I have people to lean on. And that helps so, so much..
>Thank you for all of your advice and help, we appreciate all that you do for us.
I'm glad. I enjoy doing.. this. I like being there for people. Sometimes, when I have done everything I can about my own issues, there is comfort in trying to affect the lives of others positively.
>Yes, that has to be it.
I would not have the capacity to try and mend that, subversive approaches like VERA can help but the fact that he is on the defensive to that extent suggests that there is a lot of unprocessed stuff in the background that you can't deal with for him. How would he react being asked how he feels about a subject? One thing that can through people off guard is to surprise them. For example when someone starts yelling at you, to respond with concern about their reaction ("Are you okay?") rather than react to it.
>>42740699
It always sucks the hardest when funds are the biggest problem in the equation.
>>42750869
Awesome, happy to hear Anon! It always brightens my day when people share their progress, thank you for that.

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Time for a break. Also, damn this spam filter enforced reply limit.
>>42749056
>>42750812
I heard there was some drama and the original creator of it left the project, which is a shame.
>>42752355
Be proud of yourself, you did great! <3
>>42752399
>>42753393
Thank you for your continued patience with me.

>>42755189
i relate to a lot of this. i feel like i am constantly spinning my wheels and lost in my head and i literally forget to do anything to better myself or improve my life. i cant make any decisions, and i dont know what i believe or what i want to do or what i should do, and i feel like even if i knew i wouldnt be capable enough to do it. what do you mean by abstract needs?

>>42756264
for me the worst of the confusion comes when I'm emotionally overloaded, I had a big cry and im (somewhat) more normal now. i can def relate to getting so lost in thoughts i dont know what anything means anymore and *everything* seems impossible, especially when I've had extended poor mental health. i've found all I could do about that is train myself not to take my thoughts so seriously - be patient, kind to myself, and act unreasonably if possible. basically my brain *is* trying to work stuff out with all the overthinking, and questions like 'even if I knew, how would I be capable enough for it/ready?' do have some point, and sometimes point to a genuine lack of equipment for a task, but there's also a lot of imaginary barriers and thinking through everything is a poor and exhausting way of making progress. that's what I've found, though I'm far from defeating it. you have to fight your mind's expectations as much as possible and make yourself do things even when it seems pointless. which is very hard to start doing. I hope you relate to that or it helps. I don't really know why I'm like this except probably autism. and maybe just poor mental health making it easy for me to delude myself into thinking that thinking about things is going to solve my problems. there are probably a lot of personality factors like lack of hedonism, focus on internal world vs external etc that go into it too tho

>abstract needs
the needs are only a little 'abstract' I guess, but it's like. it's stuff like I need to feel a certain way, I need to understand this idea, I need to understand why that upset me so much, etc. sometimes more longterm like, I don't like who I am but I don't know exactly who I want to be, my brain just gives me hints. confusing thoughts and feelings. and then as I pore over that material it becomes increasingly fragmentary and abstract. i hope that makes sense. fear and desire get displaced onto quite abstract behaviours

>>42756511
>you have to fight your mind's expectations as much as possible and make yourself do things even when it seems pointless.
that is a nice way of putting that, thank you nona.
>I need to feel a certain way, I need to understand this idea, I need to understand why that upset me so much, etc.
ohhk, that makes sense. i get like that a bit i think, i often get stuck thinking about certain topics and yes it definitely gets more abstract. like i have this need inside me to understand how things *really* work because it feels like there are so many fake layers.

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1/2
woke up on saturday, decided to starve myself. after napping later on, decided to read about starvation, and reconsidered due to risk of permanent organ damage. went to get my antipsychotics and also to have a large meal. the meds are working, suicidal thoughts are mostly supressed and i am functional, don't know if it's a placebo or not but that's good. also apparently my roommate has the same antipsychotics i use, so i could ask her when i run out. still stressed out though - was 10 minutes late for work today and that made me hyperventilate.
>>42756203
i'll try this dishwashing approach, but i am very bad at sticking to habits. i stopped going to the gym for now, and i also stopped reading out loud, if you recall that. but i'll try.
>Someone in particular making your life miserable?
i had an impulse of just killing a random person, simply to feel the cognitive dissonance and learn more about it. plus, there'd be no reasonable motive, which would make it easier to not get caught. besides that, i did think of killing some of my friends that use hard drugs, because i am really scared of them and feel like they're a bad influence on me, even though i still like them as people. i feel like i developed an extreme disgust for drugs as a mechanism to prevent myself from getting addicted, because i am very prone to it, with my mental illnesses and all.
>Do you find it to correlate...
no, i felt like that when i was playing games with my friends, at work, walking down the street, waking up, falling asleep... the only thing that numbs it is being with others.
my friend is fine, we share memes with each other and i'll visit him maybe this summer or even in a couple weeks. but i don't think he'll be able to come back, even though it's really unfair and there was no proof of wrongdoing.

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2/2
>>42756207
>There is nothing noble in your suffering
i would like to contradict, but i have no good argument. the only thing i can say is that i value honesty a lot, but my thinking is very shallow. i will think about it.
>do you have people that can relate to your experiences around you
isn't everyone like that? 95% (pulled out of my ass) of people hate their job and a lot of them are overworked, one of my closest friends is disassociating at work, and ultimately we all know we're working for the big man while being paid unfairly because that's how profit is made. it'd be more surprising to see someone who hasn't yet realized that they're in a home-job-home cycle. i feel like i'm different because i have poor response inhibition (and other ADHD symptoms) which makes me furious about the state of things, while others can inhibit their feelings in fear of losing their paycheck.
>What's the general experience with them anyhow?
well, i cry less often and my suicidal thoughts pass a lot faster. i feel like i want to do things and not just bedrot. from the side it did appear that i got horribly worse when my meds ran out and i got better when i first got on them, there is a contrast in behaviour.

I can't get myself to do enough since my dad died. I reduced my course load at college to the one course that I have to take concurrently this semester and my professor is very understanding but I literally haven't started any classwork yet and my exam is this week. She will probably let me extend it so its not by any means over but I can't even start I just end up scrolling the board, cleaning, playing music, or cooking for my sister/mother.

The biggest issue is that my dad loved hearing about the classes I took and I used to tell him about everything I learned. He remembered enough about the classes I am taking to be able to tell me what that I am learning is new discoveries or maybe something that he had to learn in a higher course that is now taught in regular undergraduate courses. Sometimes consciously I don't want to start watching a lecture or doing classwork because of this but mostly I just feel like shit when I think about starting doing it.

I also need to clean his stuff from the hospital out of the back of my car I haven't touched it and its been in there for over a month. I wish he would have lived a bit longer even though he was really lucky to live as long as he did with what he had. I accepted that I am trans too late for him to ever know and now I can't separate wanting to transition from wanting to escape grief even though I have been able to pin down that I need to transition since last August. I felt like my life was being ruined by not transitioning but the past few days I feel like I could be ruining my life by transitioning.

>>42756224
Peacock is adorable

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sorry i’m late, someone ordered a peacock? (bump)

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Hi again /sig/. I recently got my old weighted blanket out of the attic to help me sleep. It’s weird to remember that even though I can sleep without it, it really does improve my sleep. Unfortunately, I’ve never washed it, probably because it’s hand wash or dry clean only. I’m going to see if any dry cleaners are willing to take it. I could get a new one if I had to, I’m just saving that as a last resort.

I had a body dysmorphia dream last night, but the nice thing was that when I woke up, I could see that I’ve been putting time into getting my body how I want it. I am gonna tell my therapist about my dream.

I realized today that my panties are getting too big. It’s a bittersweet experience. It’s a pain to keep buying smaller clothes, but it does mean I’m progressing in my fitness goals!

Anyway, I think that’s enough for now. Keep on keeping on /sig/mas!

>>42759596
one of the few males that are pretty by design in nature

lucky prick

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you really win some and lose some cus having to recover from some procedures I needed is a) so insanely taxing that I ended up hitting up a traumatic ex in lieu of more Irreversible maladaptive coping mechanisms and b) causing me to lose weight and it's too fast for sure but I'm glad

anyway. I made a new friend and I can't tell if I have a crush on him or if I just feel giddy to meet someone exciting and he might not even like guys anyways but still some advice on how to not be a creepy anxious attachment freak that scares the hoes would be pretty cool
>t. bpdemon

>>42756214
>I can't say that it is easy, but I have people to lean on. And that helps so, so much..
I am very glad to hear you have some sort of support structure in place.

>I'm glad. I enjoy doing.. this. I like being there for people
>Sometimes, when I have done everything I can about my own issues, there is comfort in trying to affect the lives of others positively
I can understand, it is a very noble goal to strive for.

I hope this week goes well for you.
Thank you.

>>42761227
sometimes the females turn male when they hit bird menopause

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does anyone else use AI for planning stuff out? I made 6 month crossdressing plan, growing hair out and getting the most feminine haircut, clothes, posing, make-up, exercise, clothes etc. im only a few weeks ago but i can already see differences between my pics when i started versus one month in

>>42761953
for real?

I keep making a habit of coming back here, making a couple posts, and not following up for a month+. i think mostly because i've been trying to use 4chan less.

there's a lot i'm worrying about rn and its stressing me out and also really highlighting how i just do not have a support system, or really any actual close friends for that matter.

i was supposed to have an appointment today for blood work but it was rescheduled because of a blizzard in my area and the earliest available time they had was at the end of april, so i just have to hope that everything is going fine until then...
i finally went and got a consult for laser/electrolysis and it the estimate i was given was quite a bit lower than i was expecting to pay, so thats really cool. i just have to actually make the appointments and go now...
i'm planning on taking a trip to another country in july, it would be the first time i leave the country in my life, so theres a level of anxiety about that. and i have to get my passport for that, but i was hoping to be done with or at least gone through a few sessions of electrolysis before i get it so that my passport photo would be... at least a little less bad.
on that topic, the fact that my appointment was rescheduled for april means that the next appointment after that is supposed to be in july, but that one is going to have to be postponed as well, because im not planning on being in the country at that time...

i've been a bit bad about staying on top of my course work again, i'm not failing any classes this semester (yet) but i really need to change something about the way i do things, because i'm on track to...

today in general was pretty bad in terms of dysphoria getting to me, i spent a good chunk of the day crying and being generally depressed, and started spiraling because i was really realizing i had no one i can really go to when im feeling like this...

>>42756767
>i get like that a bit I think
let me know if you have any realisations about it nona/anon, it's beating my ass right now
>fake layers
yeah I'm very skeptical and my mind makes things needlessly complex x )
>>42721843
today should be a pretty good day but shame and overthinking are really bogging me down. my mind seems geared in the most unhelpful ways and I don't know what it wants. i guess constantly feeling what im doing is wrong is easier than actually unpacking why everything feels wrong

an early breakfast for me means an early bump for sig

>>42748077
No argument, no explanation, not even your point of view.
The only nigger I see is you.

>>42761130
You can wash it by hand if you have a bathtub.
Fair warning, it takes time and you need some strength to move it around.

>>42766563
Hey, thanks for the advice! I’ll try hand washing it if no dry cleaner in my area is willing to take it.

>>42766434
thanks
goddamn my sleep is shite

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This is at least half of you fuckers
Stay strong, I'm proud of you all

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So, I called up a local dry cleaner and they said they do clean weighted blankets, and gave me a price quote.

I also had my first virtual appointment with a financial counselor today and that went well. We went over the basics of my history, needs and goals, and she gave me a couple of things to do before now and our next meeting.

Yesterday organized a bunch more little paper keepsakes into a binder, and read a couple of comic books. Today I wrote down my thoughts on what I read.

bump

>>42769924
>So, I called up a local dry cleaner and they said they do clean weighted blankets, and gave me a price quote
That's ducking awesome.