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File: IT'S MA'AM-dani.png (2.88 MB, 1536x1024)
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>IT'S MA'AMdani edition
>QOTT: Have you ever been recorded in public?
>>
Previous thread: >>42961259
>>
>>43018040
yup. first comunnion, loiney bin etc...
>>
why not be a fem gay guy?
>>
I'm gonna kms probably because fuck being male, I don't want this life
>>
>>43018075
I'm into girls
So fem straight guy if anything
>>
>>43018095
are you sure you aren't repressing long hidden androphilia?
>>
>>43018040
No as far as I'm aware, I tend to blend into the background which is exactly what I want.
>>
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my mfw face when repping but don't have dysphoria

it ain't easy being cheesy
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>>43018075
How do I know if I'm already a fem guy and should push it further
>>
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>be repper
>meet a transbian, friend of a friend
>discuss trans stuff with her
>encourages me to come out
>transition
>date her
>she realises hrt won't do much for me
>keeps calling me a hon, malebrained, etc
>encourages me to detransition
>>
>>43018141
Yeah I'm pretty sure
I could maybe see myself dating a very feminine MtF or femboy but at the end of the day I'd be upset that we can't have kids together
>>
it's nuts how i can sometimes loose myself in validating feels and then snap out of it and realize how ridiculous the whole thing is and how retarded others will find it
>>
The other day Instagram showed me a reel of a nb 2 years mtf hormones transition timeliness using a Pic with the exact same angle and there was literally no change, is hrt a meme?
>>
>>43018467
It won't change the structure of your face
>>
is it possible your tfw no gf of the past were just a desire for sensitive friendship and emotional support plus the desire to appear like them
>>
>>43018436
ikr
can watch some trans youtubers and identify with them so much and their experiences
and then you close the tab and blink a few times and it's like
well anyway

if I was like alex consani maybe it would be a different story
>>
>>43018292
You too?
>Be deep repper
>Miserable, suicidal, pouring myself into anything I can to cope
>Meet lolcow youngshit living in dorm sharing a bed with a sex doll
>Feel bad for it and hire it to clean house
>Talking, explain I wish I could troon since 6 but too uggo & fat
>UR NOT EVEN GONNA TRY? JUST BLACKPILL? KYS
>Try, and fail as I predicted
>Tried harder than anything in life before. dropped 150 lbs. got an Orchi. Zero physical changes in two years.
>Now stuck with female legal documents, unemployable John 40 optics nuke ogre.
>Mind too far gone and beat everything fem out of myself over 35 years before starting to ever socially transition or pass even socially as female.
> Still wear jeans and T shirt because brick figure
> Try dress, UR A MAN WHO WEARS A DRESS 2 JACK OFF I get from other troons.
>MFW can't even jack off because always have been disgusted by my own dick.
>Gonna rope soon Fuck Informed Consent and the Affirmation model.
>>
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>>43018040
>QOTT: Have you ever been recorded in public?
Every time I leave my house.
>t. amerimutt city boy
>>
>>43018141
i've read so much of mefanons posts that i think if i cultivate androphilia i will be cuter i'm only meta attracted
>>
People vastly overstate how hard it is to just stay your birth sex and are disingenuous when they say they had to transition. Also it's not that bad you fucks are just whining
>>
another song to cheer up fellow reps
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zXsOut3dstg
>>
>>43018993
I'm stuck as my birth sex no matter what, whether I troon or not. I think the real difficultly comes from becoming aware of tranny stuff in general, if I was never exposed to any of this I bet it would be a lot easier to rep.
>>
can female piss feminize you lol
>>
>>43019070
it really is an infohazard, thats why trump is trying so hard to criminalize knowledge of these topics
sadly it will only help those that come after us, it wont help those already exposed to the woke mind virus
>>
ftm repper here does anyone else go to the gym/lift weights to get huge? it's a totally socially acceptable thing you can do and it helped me a lot. super stealthy too you can literally just make up any excuse that women make.
>>
>>43018478
Or your desires for a romantic partner eventually redirect onto yourself, rather than wanting to be with someone beautiful you start desiring beauty in yourself, rather than wanting to care for someone else you start wanting to care for yourself and so on
>>43018993
I'm a whiny bitch by nature
>>
>>43018993
Thanks for your non-dysphoric opinion senpai. Of course you think it's just about genitals and not self-actualization.
>>
>>43019315
>eventually
the self part happened first though
>>
>>43019401
Everyone is different, but I would guess most on the incel to tranny pipeline started by wanting the gf and not necessarily be the gf yet
>>
>>43019155
no i never leave my house if I don't have to
fuck going outside
Let me rot in PEACE
>>
>>43019397
imo its more of numb enotionallyndead repping vs tearful alive repper thing. hard repping and dead reppingbare worse than feeler and flamboyqant repping. the healthiwr and less burdened youvare the more feeler repoer you become. being flamer eases dysphoria makes youbless socially awkward and more emotional in mybexperience. its not dysphoria olympics. we are here in same boat.
>>
I remember seeing a Tumblr esque post about a decade ago saying that you should romanticize your like like a studio ghibli movie and thinking how grey and emotionally dead my life is and how I never could do that
>>
>>43019432
The whole incel to tranny pipeline is just /pol/ propaganda to make themselves feel better. It's what they would do "if I could like wake up as a woman one day" (repressed AGP)

Pre-transition I mentally broke one of the popular girls who tried to drag me into bed because I fell asleep on her shoulder and no matter what she did she couldn't wake me up. That was some good weed and a comfy shoulder, I was closeted back then so I couldn't tell anyone I was happy with the night.
>>
>>43019884
It's Der Untergang for me, and just like the movie I get to choose between a noose or a bullet.
>>
i want to hop into an incinerator
>>
>>43018040
take your HRT, retards
>>
oops drank too fast tonight :(
starting to feel sick (and i am a sick freak for real)
>>
>>43019914
For me I think the only reason I was an incel in the first place is the same reasons im here
>>
>>43020425
i do but it doesn't do shit other than make my moobs slightly larger?
>>
>feel awful about self
>see hair posts in last thread, own hair isn’t that long but maybe cutting it will help
>buzz hair
>look exactly like dad
>feel worse
I am the dumbest bitch alive and deserve to be mercy killed
>>43020425
no
>>
>>43018075
I'm too ugly to be fem
>>
>>43019397
news flash, nobody is self actualized. everyone's lives sucks. nobody is happy. everyone wants something they can't have
>>
>>43020615
iktf I used to always buzzcut when I was trans and trying to grow my hair out
>>
I wanna try crossdressing but my grandparents often visit me and I have nowhere to hide it, I wouldn't be able to live through the shame
>>
>>43021168
take razor, slit your slut throat, problem solved?
(actually don', slit a cissie instead)
>>
>>43021168
>my grandparents
Are you 12?
Why do you give a shit what grandparents believe about you as an adult?
JFC before even discussing gender identity, you need to self-actualize as an adult.
>>
>>43020801
>I'm a miserable terminally shut-in retard with no sense of how the world works and thus I conclude that everyone else must be just as retarded as me
>>
>>43019914
the incel to tranny pipeline is real. but there's nothing inherently wrong with it. especially if it works
t. incel to tranny pipeline "victim"
>>
>>43021547
ntn but she may be afraid of losing a non-trivial inheritance
thats the only thing keeping me repping
now if only theyd kick the fucking bucket already...
>>
>>43021547
Shits complex, but basically my grandma is a force of nature, she probably wouldn't let me live it down (especially if I continue repping) and honestly I don't wanna burden my family with my issues
>>
>>43021640
>inheritance
Heh, fair enough. But doesn't inheritance first go t parents? I suppose it depends on the country, the legal power of wills, and so on.
>thats the only thing keeping me repping
I'm sorry to hear that :(
No judgment. I repped till the kids were older to avoid legal troubles. Now I'm sprinting through this like there's no tomorrow.
>now if only theyd kick the fucking bucket already
Can't comment on that without glowposting.
But do keep in mind that boomers today live excessively long lives and way above the official life expectancy stats.
>>
>>43021565
I am personable person that is epathetic and kind and easily able to make friends. it really is just simply a skill issue
>>
>>43021684
my parents died of covid bc they got brainwashed into being antivax nuts
my grandparents caught it from my parents but somehow they pulled through
they disowned my brother and hes a cisgay so i know theyd do it to me too
theyre in their 90s now so surely it wont be too much longer
>>
>>43020631
good thing you aren't then?
>>
>>43022161
>"why not"
>i say why not
>you say "umm but youre not" as if this is some sort of gotcha
id be more annoyed if i didnt know you were impotently projecting your own insecurities onto me. but yeah man its awesome being masc. you catch the game last night?
>>
>>43020425
it won't work
>>
>>43022190
>impotently projecting your own insecurities
see >>43020425
>>
>>43022198
see
>>43022190
>>
>>43022198
good things do not happen to me
this is observed
hrt will not work or somehow make me even more masculine
>>
>>43022198
>why not be a fem gay guy
>well i'm not able to
>good thing you aren't
>???
>take you're hrt
only 4 genius
>>
>>43022208
>in this trillion year old universe i am somehow so uniquely special that i am more undeserving of love and happiness than any of the monsters who came before me and NO i am not a narcissist
see >>43020425
>>
>>43022223
>>in this trillion year old universe i am somehow so uniquely special that i am more undeserving of love and happiness than any of the monsters who came before me and NO i am not a narcissist
ok but this is true though
>>
>>43022235
youre going to be so mad in 5 or so years when you age out of being able to vaguely hope for the future
i hate you because i used to be you and because i used to be you i know you wont listen to me until its too late
but oh well regardless you should wake up and think less of yourself, you're not special because you're sad, the world will pass you by and you will not be able to flippantly say "good" once it does
>>
>>43020425
I'd rather keep my dick functioning
>>
>>43022265
:(
>>
>>43021190
the glow on the post is unreal
>>
>>43018233
fagcent

>>43018295
surrogacy

>>43020631
true femininity is behavioral
>>
>>43022294
id be mad too if femininity was behavioral and i was still socialized to reddit space its fucked up what they be doin to yall like
>>
>>43018075
twinks are evil
>>
>>43022316
you cannot socialize agps into acting like effeminate gay men
>>
you want to make me into a girl.
>>
>>43022345
i be sayin like you probably had the full tits and ass shit be fire probably if they aint rep your shit
>>
>>43022294
>true femininity is behavioral
does this mean anything or just that like if i would've made it i'd already be happy as a fem gay
>>43022377
?
>>
>>43022265
i'm sorry
>>
>>43020425
I’m scared to start
>>
please god make it stop
>>
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I just realized that the capacity for happiness is finite whereas the capacity for misery is infinite!
>>
I masturbated and weirdly enough it made me less dysphoric than usual
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"two more weeks"ing myself on transitioning
>>
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>I'll transition after ffs
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>>43023429
it's subtle but she looks better
>>
Remember that time before you knew what trooning was? Even if you felt like that was horrible, realistically, it wasn't that bad. You could have survived. Go back to that headspace, and trooning can be an afterthought, and you can take control of your life and begin to find happiness
>>
>>43023449
It's not enough
>>
>>43023454
i still wanted to kill myself back then
>>
>>43023467
I swear I remember reading she deliberately had only minimal changes done
>>
>>43023449
Ugly person remains ugly, even if now looking more of an ugly woman than an ugly men
Most of my thoughts revolve around wanting to be beautiful
>>43023454
I can't even find a job in this economy, back in uni I could at least hope the pain would end after graduation
>>
>>43023470
yes but that's irrespective of your knowledge of trooning or your constant rumination of not being able to troon. So theoretically then it's not entirely related, and it is possible to be happier in life without the need or desire to troon. I personally am not against it though fundamentally if that is what a person wants. But I see it as somewhat self destructive. I feel similar to recreational drugs. But hey, sometimes peoples lives are actually made better by drug use.
>>
im on vacation in the middle of the mountains and im essentially financially dependent on my family
and I have a shared account debit card and somehow my dad compromised his info to scammers and is gonna reset his cards so that means my debit card won't work and I won't be home until later this week

he let me get cash out here but goddamn my family are idiots and cannot die soon enough
my dad said my mom threatened to divorce him (my mom, who is 100% physically dependent on him for basic chores and maintenance)

i don't really talk much to my mom except i try to flatter her in text messages so she won't disinherit me

I just wanted to tell someone this, I don't care if you think I'm evil or whatever
>>
>>43023454
>just stop remembering the forbidden knowledge bro! just don't think about the cognitohazard and it'll go away!
yeah that doesn't actually work, best you can do is coperepresswhile still thinking about it constantly
>>
>>43023504
>I can't even find a job in this economy, back in uni I could at least hope the pain would end after graduation
I too am having trouble getting a different job. I dont have advice other than all recessions pass. One day you will be able to get a job. I believe in you
>>
>>43023507
my depression was diffuse, now it's very narrowly focused
>>
>>43023511
It is possible to stop thinking about it constantly. May not be easy. May take some time. May be very hard. But it can be done. I would say it's necessary to live. Not necessarily repression if it is not for you, but to make up your mind and start living how you want.
>>
Do you hate your family for not accepting you being gay?
>>
>>43023543
I know I cannot change ones mind in a single interaction. Just think about it. Maybe there is progress to be made there.
>>
>>43023558
It really helps to know what you want. Right know I'm in a headspace where not only do I not know what I want, I don't even know what I am anymore
>>
>>43023558
for a while sure but for how long? i don't think you can stop thinking about it permanently because if you really didn't want to think about it you just wouldn't think about it. if you have to condition yourself to not think about it then youre fucked because you'll run into the paradox that trying not to think about something less inherently makes you think about it way more than usual (i.e. "don't imagine a pink elephant")
so yeah, i guess you can rep in your 20s, but i think that just ends up with you breaking down when you're john 30 or 40 or 50. i don't think there's a way to rep that will get you to john 90
>>
>>43023619
>trying not to think about something less
trying to think about something less*
i doubled my negatives
>>
>>43023583
Yes very true. It took me many years to decide what I want. Many mistakes. I've changed my mind quite a few times. It's a journey. Take care anon.
>>
>>43023619
That is true I don't think you can stop thinking about something permanently. I would say it's not necessarily about true repression. It's more like acceptance. I'd say it's similar to how grief works. You may never truly get over the death of someone important to you. But over time, you are able to live on, and the pain becomes more bearable. I dont believe in inevitability of breaking down later in life. Perhaps if you cope by pushing it out of mind without ever dealing with it emotionally it will come roaring back. But if you work through it, and face it head on, and grieve and process it, I believe it's possible to move on past the pain of not being able to be the gender you wanted.
>>
i need a pinkpiller gf
>>
I guess i'm just waiting to see if tech changes anything, life is a blur so far, it's like i've been stuck in stasis forever.
I guess the idea is i'll eventually end up alone with enough saved to just stay home and rot waiting
Just is so tiring to work or deal with anything, other people can have like fulfilling relationships, can have a life even if they were a NEET they can at least like be themselves at home
Sometimes I like listen to those subliminal message videos, I was big into manifestation for a while, tried getting back into prayer, tried astral projection, ect. Didn't get me extra money, definitely didn't turn me into a woman, I guess the worst part about stuff like that is it gets your hopes up. Why did it have to be this way, why couldn't I have been born just slightly luckier, why do I have these retard thoughts constantly, i'm not feminine at all in personality or mannerisms, i'll probably never know for sure what caused this, it's probably agp dysphoria too not even trutrans pain hahahahahahhahaha
>>
I don't even think I'd like to be a "true and honest woman", something like a futanari would probably fit me better
>>
>>43024341
I wish I had a futa
>>
>>43023454
if i remasculinized i'd kill myself before you can say autogynephile
>>
>>43023454
I was happy before because I was a kid. As an 18 year old before I figured it out I felt empty and sad like I had something on my chest I needed to come clean about
>>
>>43018993
it is pretty bad actually
>>
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I took a break from even checking the internet (aside from music and google maps) for a couple weeks, and while it did make my general stress levels go down I still want to be a woman just as badly.
At all times I either actively hate existing in this man body or feel like I'm piloting a robot in a weird dissociated dreamlike way.
>>
>>43022294
Gross
I was thinking feminine silhouettes
>>
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>>43023454
it doesn't work like that
>>
I feel so fucking disgusting
>>
i'm having a repper-style tranny emotional breakdown again
>>
Tell me about your relationship with facial hair.

Mine is disgustingly thick and if I miss a single day it is a horror show. I just started laser hair removal a few weeks ago and it's already the best thing I've ever done. If appointment #2 and beyond are as effective as #1 was I am gonna feel fucking gorgeous.
>>
>>43025942
>>43025967
You're gonna be ok ladies!! We're in screaming into the void hours, get comfy
>>
>>43026025
i used to pluck it reflexively till my early 30s
it doesn't feel nice to grow it now but i need it for plausible deniability
>>
>>43023509
>be third worlder
>parents cry woe is me financially to avoid spending a dime on my actual well being
>eventually spend 100k on a dogshit piece of property and a bunch of expenses to status project in front of peers
>tfw even a 1/5th of that could've really helped with my life
>>
>>43018622
i've even progressed to the point that being a hon not that big of a deal because it's not the attractiveness that matters even though i might wish for one time and time again and that dealing with external problems is easier when being fine inside but despite the conceptualizing it's still a tall order not to mention straight up hilarious if someone else was doing it
>>
>>43026073
Idk I am getting laser hair removal on my face after a 10 year beard and nobody has identified me as trans about it yet.

Why do you need it for plausible deniability?
>>
>>43026174
i guess i don't need need it but i feel more vulnerable now that i know why i was doing it
>>
what happened to famrepgen
>>
Yeah I'm pretty sure I'm not actually trans I'm just an hrt male who wants to feel included and gets a quick dopamine spike whenever someone mistakes me for a woman/jokingly calls me one. I'm so sorry for ever trying to claim the label.
>>
>>43026376
They successfully repressed and went back to being cis women
>>
>>43026559
that's so rough... imagine having to live as a woman in 2026... that's hardmode
>>
>>43018771
I did everything except change the legal documents. Which kept me employable.
Now I scheduled a consult for srs.
It's unlikely I'll ever pass, but I can be a cuntboy in public and a good girl for my bf at home.
>MFW can't even jack off because always have been disgusted by my own dick.
hence why I'm going for srs.
at least repping gave me the resources to try.
I'm already out as a fag for a long time so femfag moding is no surprise for anyone.
>>
i want to die
>>
>>43027003
me too nona, im sorry
whats wrong?
>>
I feel like I'm just inherently unlucky in life and no matter what I set out to, it will sooner or later fail
>>
>>43027786
same
over the past 4 years I got cancer, started hearing voices, lost all my money and now have terrible brain fog and no motivation. that on top of beng a loony troony. life just ins't fair anon let me tell you!
>>
How do I actually finally kms?
>>
>>43023729
I agree I think like many things in life you just have to live through it and grieve it and eventually you will move forward into a new phase. Nothing is fixed, the people who troon out later do it because they do not process what they are feeling and experiencing, you have to get to the other side of it and accept that you do want something else, you cant have it and thats okay. You can focus on other things and live the life you have instead.
>>
I DON'T WANT TO BE A FUCKING MAN FOR FUCK'S SAKE
>>
>>43023454
I’ve basically always wanted to kill myself, like I remember in middle school trying to figure out if jumping from the second floor of that building would kill me
>>
>>43023454
Before I knew what trooning was I still wanted to be a girl and it still made me depressed, I just had no idea there were people who felt the same way and were attempting to make it happen. I remember being sent to psychologists at ten years old and being terrified of telling them all the reasons I was unhappy because I thought my parents and Jesus would hate me and I'd get sent to one of those conversion camps.
>>
I want to be a princess
>>
I would've been 100 percent accepted by my liberal family/town/most of my friends, but didn't figure out what was wrong until it was kind of too late
>>
The more I read about it the less I want it
I don't wanna be perceived as weak, I don't wanna have my personality changed, I don't want to feel even more estranged from society
>>
I had a bad experience with having sex with a guy as a boymoder and now I've lost pretty much all desire to troon out further. I skipped my last injection and I don't feel any dysphoria or agp sexual desires other than having a wet dream about being a girl. I just don't feel anything.
>>
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Is growing these a sign I should troon out? Never felt the desire and still don't really but I mean...
>>
>>43029723
how did you grow that
>>
>>43029723
>body hair on hand
ask yourself
i am so jealous its not fair its not fair i cant take it
>>
>>43029884
More than likely genetics but its more fun if I say it was from the Covid shot.
>>
>>43029723
Nice breasts. You’d make a hot girl
>>
>>43029723
Lose weight
>>
>>43029723
those are nicer tits than 99.95% of the sad troon ones I see, but from this pic, they're still on a broadly male frame, so no
>>
>>43030001
>>43031584
You're both gay, it's just a fat dude
>>
>>43032114
I know, I'm just saying tranny tits almost universally look bad, yet this weirdo's pair avoids some of those hallmarks like being conical, having sag despite being small, and nipples that point aggressively outward
>>
the way this body works is so nasty
>>
>>43032865
Being human is disgusting.
>>
>>43033047
trve
I should have been an elf
>>
I'm so tired all the time
of being alive and just literally
>>
it's hard to find motivation to do literally anything when you have zero hope of ever achieving what you actually want
>>
if a tgirl topped you would you be able to rep indefinitely
>>
I'm getting closer by the day to just roping. I can't troon out because I know too much but I can't rep forever because it's just too painful. The only thing that scares me is actually pulling the trigger, do any anons have recommendations on truly fool-proof, gentle ways to kms? I don't want something violent, it needs to be pretty much instant.
>>
>>43033540
I would instantly start crying and lose the ability to rep
>>
sometimes when i look at myself in the mirror in the dark i can see myself as an ugly girl instead of a guy
>>
I relapsed and masturbated to gentlefem again
>>
depressed
>>
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>>43018292
similar circumstances except i kept repping
>meet two transwomen on here nad become best friends with both of them
>one discourages me from transitioning the other encourages.
>the discouraging one considers me too depressing and ends friendship
>the encouraging one offers to help but i feel it's too late at this point and that i'll only be a drag on her life so I end friendship
>discouraging old friend comes back after a year
>tells me i'm a loser because i've been a depressed mess for the 2 years she's been gone
>leaves and cuts all contact
I'm having a pretty bad time.
>>
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I think that if I had been groomed years ago I would've trooned out lmao
But sometimes I wonder if I can still be groomed into it
>>
>>43035698
I wish I was groomed so bad
>>
>>43035747
Honestly
same...

But is it still grooming if you give tacit consent to it? or just erp?
>>
>>43035747
I WISH I WAS GROOMED SO BAD
>>
>oldcel
>haven't taken picture of myself in 3-4ish years
>need a photo for some dumb class assignment
>get flashbanged by my ghoulish visage
I knew I was ugly but jesus.
>>
>>43035698
>>43035747
>>43035824
I wish I was groomed so bad
I'm considering making b8 discord accounts to get ppl to "groom" me
I also saw some retard giving Grok a custom prompt to (in a way) groom themselfs
>>
>>43026376
i'm so used to bottling up my feelings that i just shrug
>no femrepgen
>ok, never mentioning my dysphoria ever again
>>
>>43036508
We need to revive it, it was kinda better than this thread anyway every time I looked into it
>>
>>43035801
I guess what I mean is I wish when I was younger someone was able to break through my bullshit and convince me to stop being retarded and transition already
>>
this is no way to live, I really wish I was dead
>>
>>43028268
yeah
>>
I'll never look like Jessica Harper in Suspiria uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
>>
I'm really missing out on life holy shit
>>
>>43026025
it's fucking torturous having that disgusting shit grow out of my face every morning, I rip it out with tweezers daily but it just comes back
I really wish I could get laser/electro but idk how I could pull off the logistics of getting it done secretly or explain why I'm getting it as a normal healthy straight man
plus I fear that it would just come back since unfortunately I'm an actual repper (not on hrt)
>>
>>43037490
>how I could pull off the logistics of getting it done secretly or explain why I'm getting it as a normal healthy straight man
Does your country/city lack dermatology private practices?
Loads of perfectly straight male celebs (big and small) do this. It's nowhere near as uncommon as you think.
Reminder that every single facet of what's colloquially known as "trans care" has in fact first been developed for cishets.
>>
>>43037452
I really missed out on life
>>
>>43037497
no, but I'd probably get some uncomfortable questions that I wouldn't be able to answer
>>
you guys are the only ones I can talk about this stuff with
>>
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>>43035698
I was groomed but it's not like the affirmation continued past that so I detransitioned.
>>
>>43037508
just tell her that you absolutely hate that shit and don't want to spend time removing it

just go do it already
>>
>>43037490
im getting laser, since i was really young i had dysphoria and wanted to get rid of my body hair, nobody asks why
>>
Its weird that my friends and my gf dont acknowledge that ive come out to them twice, now I want to stop repping but I dont have the energy to do it a third time
>>
yeah I'm taking estrogen as a repper (orally, so I die from benzyl benzoate toxicity)
>>
>>43037490
>I rip it out with tweezers daily but it just comes back
yeah but like after a month compared to shaving where you can have a shadow in 2 days
>>
with a male body you can go anywhere
>>
Dreamt about transitioning again
>>
>>43038727
explains why i'm in hell
>>
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>>43020425
HRT won't unrape me or turn me everyone into an anthro woman.
>>
>>43020425
Im so scared
>>
>>43042312
love this artstyle
>>
>look in mirror dead on
>maybe i have a chance :)
>turn head any amount
>transform into an easter island head
>>
>>43045008
Same
I especially hate my profiles
>>
>>43042312
it actually will turn you into an anthro
>>
>>43045008
The good thing is that all the shit that is the worst in profile, like brow, nose, and chin, is all very fixable. The bad thing is that it's 100k to do it right.
>>
please use magic to turn me into a girl now please. please
>>
>>43046154
>>
>>43045706
It's really not. You can only shave so much without your skull collapsing and ideally you aren't using steel plates drilled into your skull to hold it together like most troons too
>>
>>43045008
dinarid moment. browbine shave and perhaos chin and it alright. aerodynamic profiles are aestheric
>>
just saw something horrible and sad, now I'm extra depressed
>>
How do I deal with my dickless humiliation fantasies? How do I get them out of my head?
>>
I rep because I know my skeleton will not pass (I have bodybuilder frame despite being suicide height territory as a male (5'3)) and everytime I interact with a tranny irl it is super repfuel, fuck
>>
>>43047845
you will never know a fraction of the pain that a 6'3 repper endures every single day
>>
>>43047848
I've lived 5 years with a 6'0 tranny and I will be brvtally honest with you, height doesn't matter so much unless you are 7'. Nowadays women are much taller. You have it better as a skinny 5'7-5'9 with thin frame and fingers than me looking like a Minecraft character. Fuck the demiurge for pressing "male" in character creation while being drunk
>>
Living as a man feels so fake, but there's no way out for me. I hope I get cancer or something so I can just die.
>>
got psychotests in a looney bin. op paper y/n with troony questions. perhaos i will get dysphoria diagnosed and script for antiandrogens... nice.
>>
>>43047854
i know 3 6footer wombyn
>>
Why do people so early in hrt always jump the gun and dress like a teenage girl
>>
>>43045008
this is actually ridiculous on me, i turn my head to the side and my browbone and orbitals project so far out of my face, it makes my eyes look ridiculous. like some kind of hobgoblin creature
>>
>>43037490
laser and then eventually waxing because the hair didnt completely go away was the best thing i ever did. i can run a razor over my face every few days and not even think about it and have a smooth face. before i was shaving twice a day and doing this whole routine and still had beard shadow and never wanted to be seen. get it, it makes your mental so much better
>>
>>43026025
my partner says i look handsome, which is flattering, but i also hate that my facial hair grows so fast that when i shave in the morning i'll have a stubble by dinner
>>
>>43048307
cause they are braver than us. you wish youbwere abke to so this like that perhaos with different aesthetix styke bit you do, right?
>>
>>43049017
I'm self-controlled enough to understand I need to dress for my body and not larp like I'm an anime character. On the other hand the same personality traits that'd keep me from dressing in a cringey way also kept me from transitioning at all so
>>
>>43041924
highway to hell brother fuck yeah ac/dc
>>
I guess my desire for beauty could be express through creation of art rather than directly through myself
Then again learning to draw is probably more difficult than trooning out
>>
>>43047264
I would turn my whole body into steel if it helped me pass desu.
>>
>>43049622
Same ive always been way too self aware for my own good
>>
>>43047845
iktf, what a waste giving us fuckhuge hypermasculine herculean shoulders when we're this short
too short to be a man, too broad to be a woman
>>
Egg cracked doesn't mean egg hatched you can always tape it shut
>>
>>43048118
tests for what my (pretend) fren?
also how long time did you spend there to get that shit? i just got to try some new meds and then they throw you out to suffer... ;_;
>>
>>43052829
duriannnnnn how are you i missed you
>>
>>43052856
please don't ever lie to me, i am almost autistic about lies
been worse, and a few times been better so idk?
how are you doing?
>>
>>43052877
why would i lie im autistic too
mmm thats okay too nice to hear
bad its whatever... repping
>>
repping is bad
idk if estradiol helps tho :/
>>
I'm not even sure if I count as a repper because I'm sure if I'm even trans. I might be deep in the egg or I might not even have one. I'm AMAB, female attracted, very adhd, and somewhat autistic.

Things that make me think I'm just straight cis:
>always been male-presenting
>never had any desire to dress female
>genuinely enjoy dressing like a dude, not just as a "default"
>was on testosterone for a while for being low-t and it made me feel really good, I believe if I was trans estrogen would be required to make me feel good
>footfag, which is mainly a male thing
>attracted to feminine women, not to androgyny

Things that make me suspect not entirely cis:
>If I was already a cis woman, I would be fine staying that way
>find women easier to talk to and be friends with
>was a soft, sissy, "gay" acting boy, never aggressive, never domineering
>never learned any "art of manliness" skills until very far into adulthood
>prefer fiction that has a female main character, from a female point of view
>I like shit like rom-coms and soap operas more than many women do
>old, *none* of the above was normalized for me as a boy
>strongly prefer lesbian porn to straight
>like reading (and writing) erotica/smut/porn far more than I like photo/video porn
>have never found p-i-v sex to be all that great
>only maintain an erection by doing, talking, or thinking about other acts (foot stuff, bondage, humiliation), not the sex itself
>neither young nor anything close to virgin, so this isn't just inexperience
>long-term participation in online communities using a female screen name, and it didn't feel at all fake or a costume
>I am a songwriter and when I use AI to make a girl sing the songs, it sounds like "me"
>I keep reading that cis people don't think about gender at all, so even thinking about it this much means you're not cis
Particularly this last one, is what keeps me coming back to this question. Am I trans, nonbinary, etc, or just low-t, porn-brained, gay-acting straight man?
>>
>>43053985
Id say were about on the same level and my opinion today is it doesn't matter what's right and its worth a try if the what if is getting to your head too much
>>
girls arguing why they totally based be fr fr...
;__;
>>
>>43053985
>Things that make me think I'm just straight cis:
None of those quite matter.
>Things that make me suspect not entirely cis
Most of those don't quite matter.
And I say this as someone that resembles you quite a bit except I'm the most standard bifag (top for women, gigabottom for men - and I don't mean just sexually).
What I did was slowly lean into my feminine expression. Took better care of myself, take a lower dose of hrt, dress more andro, got into a relationship with a working class dude and, slowly, over the last 3 years, life has gotten better and more comfortable.
I still don't know if I want (or whether it's realistic) to troon out but I like how I look better, I am more motivated to work and I am happier to be alive. I still get strong euphoria when I'm confused for a woman, though. So in a way I still rep.
But I'm glad I tried to do something rather than wallow in misery.
If none of this causes you misery, then you're fine. It's nothing wrong to be a fag flamer sometimes. You can pass it off as silliness.
>>
I guess if I make some money I could crossdress for a while in private, see how that goes
>>
Genuinely think it's funny that you mentally ill retards have to spend the one and only life you get to live on this earth repressing
>>
i wish i would comfort some regulars fr
i don't want to pretend wanting to fuck them
as i don't
but wish dahmer version two would kill my freak body for his amusement...
>>
>>43054614
hii?!
are you close to or something to sweden?
i'm dead stuck lmao
io wish you would be here making me stuck dead... lol jk... totally!
discord if you hate ugly old bitch pretenders? idk?
>>
>>43054614
Suffering in this existence will be repaid in the next one
>>
>>43051485
I think my yolk has broken
>>
>>43054650
Vi kan kjøpe heile sverige om vi vill
>>
the world is so evil
>>
>>43054614
why are you being so mean to me
>>
>>43054679
based norwegian overlords cumming all over their new domains ig?
btw (not part of the negotiations) asl bitte u qt girl?
>>
>>43054566
>If none of this causes you misery, then you're fine
None of it causes me misery except at times when I've been in a relationship with a woman who didn't like it. Like, they liked the part where I was like a "gay best friend except straight", but they didn't like the part where I wasn't also a chad. When with a woman that can handle me its fine. I get far more misery from the ADHD and autism.
>>
getting better at restricting again finally. shame i got so fat in the interim
you guys read anything fun recently? through a few chapters of a us civil war history and it's fine, want to find some fiction.
>>43054614
glad someone is happy <3
>>
my life is over
>>
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>>43043387
Same desu.
>>43045077
Lies.
>>
>>43056786
prove that I'm lying then
>>
>>43054614
You can say that about anything
>>
>>43054680
yeah
>>
I need to drink again
>>
>>43052829
many things. there were lik 2-5 troony questions. two about wanting to be opposite sex and ones about wanting to be forest warden, florist or soldier. oh and about plying as a kid in home or with dolls. ni dolls for menbut i did played home and wiuld like to work in forest or be a florist. soldier i checked hard no
>>
>>43057608
nta but you could've just written to the tranzicija.pl peeps.
I'm from Romania and wrote to them and they gave me a step-by-step guide on how to use your system to get hrt and bypass the even stricter regs in my country. I flew to PL for two weeks and left with supplies for a year.
>>
social media is designed to mentally torture reppers
>>
>>43026519
Okay so the woman thoughts are coming back. I know this makes me useless and I should man up but I realized I just needed blessing from someone I actually care about to push me to the finish line.
>>
evil world
>>
My one dream is to cuddle on the couch with someone and I can't have it. How is it possible for some small electrical signals in our brain to torture us this much?
>>
>>43058057
yeah
>>
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>>43057647
oh i will look it up. the plan is to get oit of looney bin, get cyproterone from internet and flee away.
>>
i hate my life so much oh my god i need to die
>>
>>43057684
Truth
>>
It's crazy to see ppl with huge dysphoria ITT not getting on E and then there would be retards that got on hrt for absolutely random reasons
>>
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No I won't take my meds
>>
My glasses have this groove at the top near the lens where all the dead skin and other detritus collects and forms a yellow gunk. Every few weeks I dig it out with a pair of tweezers and eat it.
>>
>>43050281
The issue is you'd die
>>
>>43058726
I don't think my dysphoria is particularly huge
It's probably within the limits of what non-autistic cis people experience without even thinking about it
>>
it just makes no sense, some people take hrt and look like women... how am i not supposed to kill myself over this idea that i could never achieve
>>
>>43061219
You should, but most just suffer through it having lost a part of themselves in the revelation
idk I think I was worse at the end of repressing then I am now, detrans and repressing
>>
>>43061479
why did you detrans
>>
>>43061533
I didn't pass obviously
>>
>>43061594
were you at least a boymoder? i feel like hrt has done nothing for me im a cis man in everythibng to everyone
>>
>>43061621
I don't know, some people said I was but they were trannies trying to groom me to come out and I think they'd have done it to anyone. I was legitimately out for a while, though: voice trained, women's clothes, etc
>>
>>43061665
i wish i could do that,i cant take it anymore manmoding 247
>>
>>43037490
feels
>>43037497
>every single facet
lols
>>
>>43061794
I mean you can just be a hon
>>
>>43054614
you spend the one and only life you have on 4chan seething, and no doubt your offline existence is a joke too

we know what you are
>>
>>43049958
Learning to draw won't make you suicidal and is very fun. Trying to become a facsimile of a woman is not fun
>>
>>43061998
i canttt i look only like a man forever, nothing fem about me remotely
>>
>>43054614
former repper here the coof made this realization hit too hard so I trooned out
>>
>>43062756
so now you spend your one life being a fake woman instead. Either way, you've lost, no matter how much you try and cope
>>
forcefeming reppers
>>
>>43062939
me and who...
>>
>>43058270
eh how long have you been there?
longest for me was just a few months
>>
The repping that calls itself repping is not the real repping
>>
repping makes you miserable, correct?
have you thought that maybe the solution is trooning out and becoming a rapehon?

I am very smart
>>
Saw an Instagram post of two incredibly hot lesbians one of which being a younshit passoid with super nice tits, the other is a feminine cis dyke that kind of looks like me im going insane
>>
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>>43063650
>the other is a feminine cis dyke that kind of looks like me im going insane
>>
>>43063511
it's worse to try and fail, inviting criticism even if just from yourself
>>
Im trying to mentally prepare myself for the idea of failing
>>
I will never transition but I will not masculinise any more thanks to hrt
>>
>>43063987
If you're changing the natural hormone distribution of your body then it's already a soft transition
>>
>>43064016
I live entirely as a man, I'm just hormonally female adjacent
>>
saw my face in a car window
>>
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I have devised an extremely simple test to determine whether you are naturally more male or female mentally.

Girls tend to draw their lowercase "a" with the little curl on top where boys do not. Obviously, this isn't a hard and fast rule, but I will note that when I was in school, MOST girls wrote their "a" like the right, but ALL boys wrote their "a" like the left. I, for one, also wrote my "a" like other boys, which is why I must rep.
>>
>>43065408
I feel like the teachers got mad at everyone if they tried to do their a's like on the right until everyone got older where I grew up. We were always taught to do the left.
>>
>>43065408
i always did both
i think having decent handwriting at all is a better indication of fembrain
>>
>>43062939
hi I'm a repper
>>
>>43065408
fembrained is writing in cursive
>>
Anyone else was interested in girls and relationships really early compared to others? I had dreams about selecting my future wife when I was like 4 or 5, when I was 6 I was all over that one girl in pre-primary
>>
>>43065408
cope, you're malebrained because testosterone poisoned your brain for most/all of your development
>>
i have male handwriting should i kill myself
>>
>>43066091
I was best friends with one girl before 10 and then after puberty imagined mostly getting raped by older girls but yeah probably had crushes here and there
>>
>Norwood 2-3
>20
It wouldn't have worked out for me anyways hahaha....
>>
>>43068600
get on fin senpai
>>
>>43068600
If youre 20 those hair follicles are probably still alive
>>43070454
This
>>
I honestly only really want the form and not really the function and that helps me rep
>>
the curse of the dysphoric agp straight cis male
>>
I find it funny how people go to lengths to prove how shit they've done in the past were just dumb phases but the shit they're doing today is them finally being their true and honest selves (and totally not just another phase)
>>
>>43071042
When do you just accept that a changing mind is a healthy one
>>
Regular normalfags are struggling to find work, pay bills, and live on their own

Normal, neurotypical, no ADHD or other learning disabilities, regular upbringing, adequate socialization, friends, romantic experiences.

NORMAL FUCKING PEOPLE ARE STRUGGLING

How the fuck am I as a brain-fucked low IQ schizophrenic dropout tranny hikki supposed to make it in this world? HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE???
>>
>>43068600
>full set of hair
>transition
>this isn't working
>detrans
>three years later
>Norwood III
>bald patch at top of head
>bald patches on back of head/neck
GRIM
>>
>>43071799
this may not work if you do not live in an alleged welfare state but today when speaking to a social worker i said i'd set myself on fire in front of city hall and now after six years my case is urgent
>>
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>>43058063
>twang
>>
i dont want to date other trannies because theyll age like shit. should i not transition so i at least age into a good ol boy instead of a gargoyle?
>>
>>43071799
twin we need to lock in
>>
I think I'm ready to give up and be a cringe transbian but I'm in my 30s so I guess not
>>
>>43072850
>because theyll age like shit
how?
>>
>>43072931
have you seen an older tranny
>>
>>43072945
have you? what are you talking about specifically?
>>
I should have repressed
Only women can transition
Im just a man using this hobby as escapism
I fucked up
>>
>>43072850
tranners age better as they never enter menopause and shit
>>
>>43071799
nobody knows, nobody cares sadly
>>
>>43072921
>but I'm in my 30s
and?
The worst that can happen is it doesn't work the way you want it and stop.
"It's too late" is the weirdest brainworm, I swear. Niggas be getting srs at 60 but 4chan peeps be like "you're unc at 25". Truly insane.

t. rooning at 35
>>
>>43074746
I know it wouldn't work but good for you



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