How to accept that I won’t pass without ffs? (I am likely years away from affording it).
>>43047177you dont need that. just be a functioning member of society. i am not trying to troll btw. i am saying you can be cute and responsible at the same time
>>43047177every time you start to think about how irredeemably ugly, off-putting, uncanny, and just generally far from being conventionally attractive your testosteronized face is, just think about something else instead.like ice cream, or puppies. easy.
>>43047300I agree! Whenever the thought pops into your head that your appearance is hopelessly masculinized by testosterone, such that your caveman brow and Chad jaw and clearly male philtrum all disqualify you from being perceived as female or occupying women’s spaces, just remember Jesus loves you.
>>43047288I try my best. I’m not really functional but I’m very polite and the few people who know me say I’m nice to talk to when I’m not succumbing to my own neurosis.>>43047300I’ll try, thank you.
>>43047177just boymode until then
>>43048275Boymoding is making me wanna die but if I womanmode it looks horrible. There’s no escape.
>>43047177My cope is that my ffs will include anti aging elements so that it will make me 15 years younger maybe add a facelift and fat transfer for volume and tightness
>>43049233That’s a nice cope. Thank you for telling me this.
>>43047177make progress in your transition in some way even if you can't afford ffs right now to keep yourself sane.>schedule ffs consult with your number 1 surgeon and put a date on the calendar for surgery to motivate yourself to save money. these surgeries are often scheduled years in advance.>get your makeup on lock>voice train>become fashionable in some way (thrifting or just fb marketplace is a good way to get mega cheap clothes)>do cardio and hit the gym. strong curves is a great routine meant to emphasize your thighs and ass
>>43047177You don't have to accept it. You're face doesn't look how you want and that's horrible. It's a deep sorrow and sense of entrapment existing in a way you can't stand but being unable to change it currently. But regardless of how you've felt you've kept existing day by day. So just keep doing other things in the mean time.
>>43049333I’m hyper focused on all those things at the moment. I’m trying hard and I think I’m in a much better place than I used to be. But I still get weird looks all the time. I’ve had random strangers laugh at me. People have literally APPROACHED me laughing to ask if I’m a tranny. I know it’s par for the course but every day it hurts a little more, and it’s making me think I’m not cut out for transitioning.I see other people who figured it all out in a year, year and a half at most, and wonder why that couldn’t have been me. >>43049375I’m trying. Really hard. I just moved into a new place so everything is kind of a mess and I think that’s messed up my headspace a lot.
Just accept that youre mostly just lying to yourself and others in that ugly non passing cis and trans people exist and you are still probably functioning enough to type cogently in your free time and relax because youre not going to pass 100 percent of the time anyway and most people dont care about you and your lookism values that much if at all.
>>43049418it took me forever to make progress. i was a poorshit that lucked into some good health insurance that paid for ffs which fucking saved my life. i'd spend hours a day just desperately staring in the mirror pushing my browbones in and squishing my chin because i was hoping by some miracle that it would help at all (spoiler: didnt do shit). i hated how i looked and felt disgusting and stared at. i found happiness where I could (t4t is great for this ngl if you don't mind dating a fellow twinkhon) and after years was able to get ffs. literally saved my life and made it worth living. the only thing that kept me going before was feeling like i was making progress in other areas of my life wrt transition and life trajectory.best of luck nona. it's a long road, but here i am at 9 years hrt, 6 years post ffs, and 1.5yrs post srs and things are looking good for me right now. just don't let yourself stagnate.
