>>43067774
How do I make op pic happen to me!

Rubbing my clitty to LA riot footage

I wasted my life

My life has no meaning

I am in my 30s

I should have been a physics phd but instead I'm trying to make it as an artist when I sick dick and art is poverty and have no work ethic or love for it anyways

Which is why I have to get enough money for FFS (god knows how), be Peter Pan in my room and fantasy world and be my own object of desire without the need for money, friends, relationships or a social life or a career

Just me in my room looking pretty fapping to my emasculation playing video games in a meaningless life at 30+ indefinitely, hopefully getting some crumbs of money from my well off parents for HRT and supplements to stay younger looking


All of this despite just being a failed straight male who isn't trans at all

This seems like a viable option

Or maybe I make it as an artist who knows

>>43067837
off the shoulder sweater (buy at &M) Than you just need a good push up bra and your good.

>>43067774
yay its back, the nomal woman stuff thread!!!

>>43067942
Read the link in the OP. And I'm sorry you feel like that, I can personally relate to the grievance of a wasted life. I'm currently trying to move on

>>43067993
<3

>>43067774
is it normal for fantasy to take a back seat once you begin to take more real life action? it seems like there are more tangible results, but it feels weird.

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>>43068488
the linked article in op is very interesting. on one hand, it says that these feelings are a result of trauma, but that indulging them is not necessarily good or bad. knowledge of them as result of trauma does not take away feelings of butterflies in my stomach though. even stranger, the desire to be as feminine as possible, maybe it is a response to extreme stress just sitting in the brain. but the idea of actualizing it has such a strong draw. hard to tell what is right.

t. >>43068488

>>43068488
>>43068609
lastly, if it is true that there is a portion of the brain which is childlike and wishes to reduce stress by re-enacting emasculation, then it would make sense that there would be feelings of loss or numbing in response to consistent feminization (asserting yourself as feminine publicly, hrt / surgery being the maximal form) as you are ultimately closing out the loop. no male self, no fear of emasculation. but you also lose the possibly of overcoming the obstacle in that way. this a strong case for either fully repressing and being a man, or fully transitioning. anything in-between is necessarily unstable.

there are never any stories of successful manhood. to be honest, victories associated with typical masculinity never inspired anything within me. maybe that is an mef's blind spot? is it comparable to the pleasure of eating fast food vs. the long-term buildup of eating well? I find life to be more stable, calm, and I feel less fear when I forego the childlike femininity response. still, it never goes away. thank you for article.

>>43068609
It makes sense for me as well. I always felt not good enough for my birth gender even back as kid. I was bad at sports, physically and socially weak, I could not even relate to all the aggression and competition. It was definitely stressful, even though I wasn't bullied. It's like "you can't fire me if I quit" strategy gives you an out. If you suck so much at being a man, why not become a woman? I am a repper but even I can't find a counter-argument.

In the other thread it was said by >>43063126
>myself and many of the trans women here lead very normal and mundane lives
I think this is ultimately a fundamental difference between MEFs and 'trutrans'/agp (I use the conventional labels for this board even if i don't believe in them).
Outside of sex, I don't feel (and never did) any sort of gender euphoria and can't relate to most trannies. It does nothing to me to present 'hyperfem' (if anything it's a bit silly, tho silliness is fun) while for my agp friend it's a source of euphoria.
In the end, this difference maybe (?) explains why the fetishists "make it" much more often. Because I don't think about this that often. Yeah, I'm a very regular boring woman. Before ffs I looked like a cishon. No big deal. I dress my age, work a very boring job and life just go on. The wild stuff stays at home.

>>43068921
I am not sure I understand the difference you're talking about. Can you explain it more? What separates MEF and AGPs? Can't there be overlap?

>>43067774
what the fuck is a mef

>>43069249
masochistic emasculation fetish. basically this is a general for sissies

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>>43069198
>Can't there be overlap?
I'm pretty sure there is quite a lot of it.
What I am saying is that the manifestation does differ in practice (and affects the final outcome too).
Agps focus a lot on the minutiae of appearance to the point that they become blind to themselves (plenty of passoids are convinced they're ugly as sin). Not judging, just noticing. Honfidencers are the opposite - make no effort and just roll with confidence. Imo MEF in this department is somewhere in the middle - closer to agp but also closer to cisfs. I made picrel to try to explain it.
Cisfs' concerns about appearance resemble mine more than they resemble agps' (and I'm referring to 25+ mature women, not teenagers).
The difference is not (just) in looks per se (since that comes with some genetic luck too), but in the attitude towards it. As MEFs we accept imperfections easier (due to no shame) and just internalize that good enough is really good enough.
It (probably?) comes from the goal itself. I didn't want to become per se (least of all a 9/10 woman and accepted early on that that's outright impossible), just to no longer be a man. Passing as a 5/10 woman achieves that with flying colors and keeps me happy. Such an outcome doesn't please most agps in my experience. Such an outcome does please the 'trutrans' until they learned I trooned for the fetish and then they get mad.

>>43069251
>basically this is a general for sissies
sissies don't get srs, ffs nor work to soulpass
this is a general for those who troon primarily or entirely for the fetish. some used to be sissies, but not all.

>>43069266
if you're doing those things for sissy reasons, you're a sissy. just a more dedicated than average one

>>43069262
Thanks, I appreciate the effort. There is always something to learn here.
I consider myself AGP and I think my desire does indeed focus on being attractive woman rather than "just being a woman" or "just not being a man". I want to become what I am attracted to for sure.

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>>43067774
I wish I lived in a more outgoing society so I could find ppl that help me feminize myself :(

>>43068682
According to the link, if you're too emotionally attached to your sexuality then transitioning might help, otherwise you should consciously engage with MEF, ideally with a partner, knowing that you're engaging with your trauma. By doing so you avoid it escalating

>>43069266
It's MEF in general, so it doesn't matter whether they transition or not, as long as the discussion stays within the topic

>>43069477
>relying on other people to self-actualize
>imposing unreasonable conditions to even try
ngmi, nona
It's a self-perpetuating loop. You start yourself, then you become more outgoing, then you feminize further, then you find someone to help and from there on it accelerates.
You're starting from an unreasonable (or really unachievable) position.

>>43069274
>I want to become what I am attracted to for sure
Nothing wrong with that.
I'm merely cautioning that excessive obsession in that direction is bad for one's mental health.
Perfect is the enemy of good, as they say.

>>43068609
The linked article has a lot of pages btw, OP just linked the introduction but you can go to the rest of the articles from there

>>43070571
I am way more feminine than from the point where I started, but no one is coming. I am doing what I can at my own pace, but it's very slow and no one wants a piece.

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>>43067774
we need more mef content that supports wearing glasses. unironically i am (slightly) more attractive without my glasses cause my hair looks better without them but i also like being able to see

>>43070697
>no one is coming
it's 2026, it's okay to approach.
>it's very slow
I believe that. Took me 4yrs from 0% to 30%. And then under 3 from 30% to 100%.
If you don't hit the escalation point, it's simply slow. Still worth it tho.

>>43070799
Nta but are you talking about girlmoding on hormones?

>>43070741
What kind of MEF content do you like?

>>43070810
No, I'm talking full name change, srs, ba, ffs and settling in a stable relationship that becomes a household. The latter wouldn't have been possible if I had just waited instead of approaching myself.
I womanmoded on and off from year 4 but only went full time several months after ffs.

>>43070871
you met and approached them after FFS, right?

>>43068921
Isn’t agp and mef the same thing
I’m not either I’m just a girl who was very dysphoric from the outside you seem the same.
>>43069262
I think a lot of those concerns similar to cis come with time in 15 years on hrt and live stealth

Brothers, what do I do if I don't "soulpass" and it would seem almost suicidal or like trying to harm myself to try? For instance, these are characters from fiction I can relate to. As you see, none of these are female (bottom left is a sadistic crossdresser who's forced to crossdress to get an inheritance). I couldn't get myself to put even one female character. It seems my mind is more masculine and I would enjoy being a chad or something like that. But my sexual desire pushes me to want to be feminized psychologically and even physically. Maybe it's an issue of low confidence and not being around others, not being proud of my life as a man, that I feel like I need to escape to these fantasies and make them the center of everything. It's kind of unfortunate because all the way up to my mid 20s it felt like my identity was at the crossroads between masculine and feminine, but now in my 30s time chose for me, and it chose masculine, and I can't go back barring some vicious form of self-brainwashing which would be potentially very cruel to myself. Kind of sucks I guess for my coomer side.

>>43070910
MEF is a subtype of AGP if anything

Hello mef general
would you date a guy who wants to do your hormone injections and buy you cute fem clothes and makes you wear a cage and bullies you a lil

>>43071034
I don't like cages...

>>43070932
Enjoy the process of slowly feminizing yourself

>>43070904
Nope. I gay coped for a while first.

>>43071089
>Can I get a mef without the emasculation?
>Ay jimmy, get me an mef with nothing
>mef with nothing?

>>43070910
>from the outside you seem the same
It looks nearly identical, yes. That's what I was trying to explain in the comments you are replying to: that the difference is mental a lot more than physical.
>I think a lot of those concerns similar to cis come with time in 15 years on hrt and live stealth
I don't have 15yrs on hrt (12 this year) and been fully stealth for less than half of that.
I don't deny that some of it is the result of having a mostly cisf social circle, though. After all womanhood is quite a bit consensus driven.
>>43071024
Errr... idk nona. Maybe?
Again, the fetish is emasculation not necessarily euphoria for womanhood. Ofc there's overlap, but it's hard to call it a subtype of agp.
But then again, I'm judging by my experience and the experience of mef-y girls who trooned out. You might be right in the case of MEFs who stay men. Or in the case of sissies since the other anon keeps comparing us with them.

>>43068488
ya, I think so you just get the real thing when you take action, the fetish was always a cope and the terfs push it harder then anyone.

>>43071024
no, they are separate, emasculation does not equal feminization, i know that sounds hard to believe but feeling like a lesser man with emasculation doesn't mean you are a woman, just a loser man in comparison to other men, but you can obviously combine the two and believe the first statement and theres the mef agp

>>43071226
You can have MEF without that bdsm shit

>>43071360
Exactly, I made this thread for all kind of MEF, including the ones who stay men. I just want to discuss experiences and such ;;

>>43071300
> I don't have 15yrs on hrt (12 this year) and been fully stealth for less than half of that.
I don't deny that some of it is the result of having a mostly cisf social circle, though. After all womanhood is quite a bit consensus driven
Ment to say I’m 15 years I think the mef makes less difference than time and having woman friends, more girls need to spend time with women and not be weirdos when they’re transitioning

Being mentally ill with an emasculation fetish is a nightmare mode roll. I can't even get euphoria out of trooning out like AGPs can and it doesn't feel natural like for the girlbrained mtfs.

>>43071669
Are you a dysphoric MEF?

>>43067774
it actually feels really good to be gay. it feels horrible to be secretive.

>>43071757
It's indeed nice and yeah being secretive is awful....

>>43071711
Yes. I've been done with transition for a while but see myself as a traumatized man skinwalking a woman so the dysphoria is still there. I wish I could just go live a girl life like all the other troons.

>>43071835
Did you read the link in the OP? Maybe it could help you with your MEF

I had FFS but chose a shit surgeon and get clocked daily now. Tried to get it a second time with Keo and insurance denied me because they don't cover "revisions". I've been honmoding for 5+ years and dont wana detroon but can't go on getting clocked all the time either. Anyone have any advice on how to not sui besides saving 70k and getting ffs again when I'm 40 lol

yeah i guess i can go slow. one thing for example today i saw a bunch of cute asian girls and because im a white guy and was wearing a cool suit they looked at me in awe and i felt really cool and like i wanted to have sex with them and manly and it was nice. feels like it'd be evil to rip up that innocent masculinity like it's a bad thing you know. maybe i should do both or something but specially with hrt it seems very contradictory.

>>43067774
MEF is nothing but the domination over the fear of being emasculated as a man. the fear that is instilled in you, as a kid, of feminization/emasculation is to prevent you from becoming a woman. to cure oneself of it you either go full into transition and become a woman or be stuck in this cycle of using ur trauma to goon ur sissy clitty to.

>>43072007
>to prevent you from becoming a woman
Where does the desire to be a woman come from?

>>43072007
Literally that yeah. Something happened in your childhood that caused you to suffer emasculation trauma, so you began to feel aroused by reliving that trauma.

>>43072055
Some argue (like in OP's link) that it comes from the emasculation trauma itself. Or more specifically by the emotional connection you develop with it

>>43072055
Insufficiently masculinized/partly feminised brain due to hormone imbalance during gestation

>>43072088
>>43072090
If you are partially feminized, is the emasculation trauma unavoidable? Like I'd assume many of us are stuck in the middle, too masculine to fit with women and too feminine to fit with men. Very feminine men (usually gay) do not have the same problem.

>>43072138
That's definitely relatable to me yeah. The time in my life where emasculation trauma happened, I fit in with neither boys nor girls. Later learned to fit in with girls but I guess the damage was done. I'm not sure where I fall on the trauma or the brain difference being the cause though, both seem plausible

>>43072138
I was bullied growing up because I was perceived as less masculine than my peers and assumed to be gay, which confused me because I didn't feel like I was any different?, but at the same time I consciously avoided feminine interests since I was a kid and even remember having to stop some feminine mannerisms because my peers were mentioning them. Then as a teenager I started to experience this strong desire to be feminine but didn't know how to but my peers kept seeing me as less masculine so it felt like being trapped in a limbo

>>43072174
>Then as a teenager I started to experience this strong desire to be feminine
This destroyed me, too. I had already troubles fitting in and when sexuality became relevant, it became another huge reason I could not relate to my male friends.

>>43072221
nta, but when puberty hit and I realised I didn't have any desire to penetrate anyone, I realised I was somehow very different from the other boys. I hated that because it made me feel like the abuse was right about me and I deserved it, and I developed a very messed up relationship with sexuality in general

>>43072258
>I didn't have any desire to penetrate anyone
Same. Is it because of nature or nurture?

>>43072319
no clue. ive read a few psychoanalysis books that deal with being trans that I really liked so I'm biased towards nurture, but I also don't think it really matters

One must imagine Sissyphus happy

>>43072258
I'm the same but I eventually developed that desire. How do you masturbarte btw? I've always done it prone

>>43072630
When puberty started, I didn't do it at all despite being horny because I hated touching my dick. But not doing that meant it just kept happening in my sleep, staining my bedsheets which was embarrassing. When I found out that jerking off prevented both that and sexual thoughts, I started doing it every day to keep them away, basically seeing it as a chore. After I transitioned, I started using a vibrator and actually enjoying it, though I only do it once a week at most now

>>43072677
>jerking off prevented both that and sexual thoughts, I started doing it every day to keep them away
I am not sure it works that well. I never really feel satisfied.

>>43072758
It did for me back then. I stopped having sexual thoughts for the next ~12 hours after doing it

>>43072774
Short break, but better than nothing, I guess.

>>43072758
Same jerking off released tension but it made me yearn to be a woman

>>43072174
I can only see myself as a kind of emasculated man/sissy, kinda in a separate category

>>43071034
This is pretty much my boyfriend so yes lol

>>43067774
I just wish I was normal

>>43072258
Same, I forced myself into a relationship with an abusive foid to prove everyone wrong and it ruined the last 3 years of my life when it inevitably came crashing down. Never had any trauma as a child related to emasculation though. I kind of believe the hormonal gestation hypothesis.

Odd question but do any of you have a third nipple that you always thought was just a weird looking mole?

>>43073066
Hopefuel

>>43072677
>I started doing it every day to keep them away, basically seeing it as a chore.
stupid questions, but don't all pubescent boys see it that way or is this just a trans thing

>>43073177
I have no idea. I genuinely hated having sexual thoughts though. They made me feel very bad

>>43073136
Ah? I have a big mole in my chest close to a nipple but I wouldn't call it a nipple?

>>43073199
i think that is actually normal, at least growing up in a conservative household

>>43073233
Post a pic

>>43073199
>>43073233
Yeah I was gaslit into believing that god and all of my dead relatives were watching me masturbate and condeming me to hell

>>43073136
I mean the hormonal gestation hypothesis doesn't necessarily contradict the trails hypothesis. I also can't see any event that could have started it because I had these feelings even before being bullied

I genuinely deserve to be killed for being a fake tranny tbhon
Or at least in my mind death would absolve of the sin of being both a failed tranny fake and a truckers, and the sin of using transgenderism as a shield for my depraved fetish of wanting to become a woman.
Alas Im not one nor will ever be one. Truly the worst case scenario where Im cursed to live as a perpetual trans thing but not really.

>>43073255
Oh shit I just realized when I was a toddler a girl toddler a few months older than me beat me senseless and left bite marks on me multiple times at daycare and my parents said I was not really the same after that

>>43073236
>>43073251
Let me be more specific, I felt bad about my sexual thoughts because they were very different from what a boy is supposed to want and made me feel deserving of the abuse that was happening to me

Even the mefs on this thread are more normal than me
I’m an utter failure and this escapism is killing me slowly and Im out of time.

>>43073280
The oldest event I remember (and one of my oldest memories) that could have done it was when I was throwing a tantrum because I wanted my favorite cup and my dad picked it up and threw it from the stairs but idk if it could have caused that

>>43073282
Yeah I get that too, I was ultra ashamed because my sexual feelings all focused on being penetrated and so I would have to use like vegetables with vegetable oil because I couldnt aquire real sex toys in a cinservative household as a middle schooler

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>>43073238
It's just a mole

I’m Gonna die like this
Twisted, perverted and in this body I have made

>>43073335
I used to fuck myself with the top part of a disassembled toy lightsaber

>>43073370
Lol I think I mostly used carrots (because I could eat the after to hide the evidence), but I also used an empty glass soda bottle and a plunger

>>43073335
I just did prone. Never stopped doing it that way

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>>43073370
>>43073387
It was this one. They must have known what they were doing when they designed the top segment

>>43068921
>I don't feel (and never did) any sort of gender euphoria
gender euphoria is literally a euphamism for getting an erection from crossdressing

>>43073402
I started that way but read online that it could make you lose sensation permanantly so I stopped

>>43073370
>>43073387
i gotta appreciate the creativity and ingenuity

>>43073338
Nona you might want tk get that checked out if you havent already. Its probably nothing but the borders make me a bit anxious

>>43073414
I tried to stop when I read that as teenager, but jerking it off didn't work for me it feel weird and wrong

>>43073431
I did and was told it's nothing

>>43073431
I have moles like that too wtf are you on

>>43070910
>>43071024
I don't think this is true at all
agp is erotic target location error, heterosexuality inverted. A fetish for being a woman you're attracted to
mef is really just a type of bdsm, it's a submissive degradation fetish.
I would actually say agp is not even really a fetish, it's an expression of repressed gender dysphoria by a gynephile. The experience of agp is physical and literal, centered around literally having female characteristics and female presentation and really unrelated to sex.
mef is an actual fetish that is usually experienced with a partner (often a man) during roleplay. It's common for trannies because it's related to common insecurities trannies have, which are cathartically released through the fetish.
a lot of people say forcefem or mtf transformation fetishes are agp, which I think is not really true. It is at most mechanically agp, as in being aroused by the idea of being a woman, having become such due to some magical transformation. But the actual dynamic of being a woman specifically who used to be a man, and the experience of that transformation, and the sexual dynamic, is mef.

>>43073608
I think its all just cope for sublimated dysphoria

>>43073608
>really unrelated to sex.
How could it be unrelated to sex? I literally want to have a vagina instead of penis.

>>43072174
yeah this happened to me
I pretty much always wanted to be a girl though, for as long as I can remember. I avoided anything feminine because I was aware that it was wrong for me and that it wasn't what people wanted for me. I don't remember if there was some incident that taught me that though. I was always friends with a lot of girls but I went to a really small sort of hippy school until I was about 10 or 11, and then I had to move to a normal school, where I was bullied a lot for seeming gay or being a queer or whatever, which was upsetting because I didn't think I was gay, even though literally everyone else did. I constantly tried to act masculine and straight and even eventually dated girls, but it didn't matter and even my gfs friends thought I was gay, which was fine actually.
but then years later I started transitioning and realized that I actually was attracted to men and had very little attraction to women, but the idea of being with a man as a man made me too dysphoric to accept.

>>43073608
>being aroused by the idea of being a woman, having become such due to some magical transformation. But the actual dynamic of being a woman specifically who used to be a man, and the experience of that transformation, and the sexual dynamic, is mef.
I don't think it's the only possible appeal
You can enjoy MTF transformations from the perspective or a technically possible way of attaining femininity, and also it's up to you to determine which aspects of femininity you particularly seek
If you mainly want the aesthetics of looking like a woman, but still retain some aspects of masculinity (like topping others with your penis) then it can't really be MEF
Again, it highly depends what kind of feminization content you consume and what draws you to it the most, MEFs will generally seek submission and humiliation

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>>43073370
>>43073405
lol I don't think I ever used a lightsaber, though I had a couple
these things though were smooth hard plastic and the perfect size

>>43073674
unrelated to sex with another person. It's not a sexual fetish to want a vagina because you'd rather have one over a pensi

>>43073756
Don't you think genitals are very relevant to sex with other person?

When I was little, I always dreamed of wearing a wedding dress like my mothers one day. I thought I had a clear memory of playing dress up with a girl where i did wear it, but there's a photo from that day where she's wearing it and I'm wearing a shitty groom outfit. I'm not sure if it's entirely a false memory or if I did wear it but there's just no picture of it, but I thought it actually happened until like a year ago

>>43073791
yes but the point specifically is that anatomical agp isn't actually about sex with another person, it's about the anatomy itself
furthermore, agps are gynephiles so they're most likely not going to want to use it for its actual purpose anyway

>>43073815
I am meta attracted AGP. My favourite fantasy to masturbate is being a woman and having sex with a man. I very much don't want to fuck anyone with my penis or at least I never get off to that.

>>43073882
that's probably a validation of the anatomy, but if you actually are attracted to men you probably just aren't really agp

>>43073924
I mean, I understand your point. But to me, it's very sexual. I am submissive and I feel like my body or sex doesn't match the sexual role I wish to have. So I have extreme envy towards women.

>>43073409
ok?
Never had that. And certainly don't now as postop.

>>43073608
>But the actual dynamic of being a woman specifically who used to be a man, and the experience of that transformation, and the sexual dynamic, is mef
This does make sense to me. Nothing turns me on faster (and makes my orgasms more full body experience) than being reminded that the boy is being fucked out of me.
>>43073647
In 2012 I was rejected for HRT on the grounds that I'm not a tranny and not dysphoric. And they weren't wrong. I wasn't dysphoric in the clinical sense. I just wanted to no longer be a man.
While I gay coped to build up androphilia and suppress gynephilia, I started to get an idea on how to achieve that. Settled on strictly binary transition because I could afford it and it was easier to think of a life post transition as a woman than as a male-looking not-man.
I totally agree that MEF (and really any fetish) can be (and routinely is) an expression of something deeper. I just don't think it is an expression of GD in my case. Some MEF-y girls report they're no longer mef once they complete their transition. Meanwhile I enjoy it more, lol.
>>43073882
>>43073969
>meta attracted
>have extreme envy towards women
>am submissive
I had to train these into me. You already start from a better standpoint. Ygmi if you give in. Although gay coping is fun too.
There is only one step from meta attraction to truly loving men.
t. >>43068921 & >>43071300

>>43074718
>Meanwhile I enjoy it more, lol.
How does mef manifest for you after transition? I'm one of the ones it went away for and I find it hard to imagine how it would fit into my current life

>>43074718
>Ygmi if you give in.
I do not think I am feminine enough in body and mind. Even the idea of gay coping doesn't really land for me.

>>43074788
I already said it in the comment you're responding to:
>Nothing turns me on faster (and makes my orgasms more full body experience) than being reminded that the boy is being fucked out of me
I mean it quite literally. If my man wants to finish me off quickly, all he needs to do is to light choke me and either call me a failure of a faggot, anything related to fucking the boy out of me or remind me who's the man of the house. I orgasm from penetration alone 9 out of 10 cases if he does that.
He also has an incentive to do this often because he finds it so hot when I squeeze his dick that he cums immediately afterwards.
The reason I'm so "argumentative" (not really, just chill discussion) about MEF not being entirely overlapped with GD (broadly) or AGP specifically is because outside of sex I don't get any excitement out of living as a woman. I'm just... normal. Very boring/mundane life.
If I think about it enough (like when I take a long train/plane journey), there's a modicum of excitement that I'm not a man but... that's about it.
Outside of sex, there is nothing to fit in my current life which is now settled into very normal female patterns.
There probably is something in my brain that gets triggered only during arousal, idk. From long convos with my cisf friends, it turns out that this is very fembrained (so to speak). Of course, cisfs don't have mef, but at least the cisfs I chat with also feel they go crazy if they don't get dicked down periodically and they too orgasm more often/harder when they're reminded who's the man.

I think it's make more sense to see myself as an emasculated man instead of a woman...

>>43074885
>I do not think I am feminine enough in body
A lot of that can be fixed, although there are some limitations, yeah.
>and mind
All of that can be fixed. Ask me how I know, lol.
>even the idea of gay coping doesn't really land for me
Didn't land on me either. I still gay coped until it landed. And then gay coped some more until I had a boyfriend.

>>43075351
How can mind be fixed?

>>43067774
is that jum

>>43075395
Behavioral training. In the previous thread nonas explained some of it - start reading from here >>43057443
Start slow. Just add feminine behaviors and thought patterns. Change walking patterns, learn softer language, change your masturbation routine and the type of content you consume, grow your hair, get on duta, get a skincare routine and slowly give in to the realization that you're not a man.
You can do all of these literally without anyone knowing.
Then, if your genetics haven't been totally unkind with you, go further: get laser on your face and body, get slimmer (if you aren't already) and add a feminine touch to your presentation (light make up, some cute "neutral" earrings).
Notice I haven't mentioned hrt yet.
Feminizing your mind is partially helped/accelerated by estrogen but it's not absolutely necessary.
The more feminine behaviors you add (and practice them consistently) the more your mind opens up to even more feminization.

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b-bros wanna check out my girly room :3

the brown shiet you see is cause im a raw cacao (with milk or yogurt) addict so it always ends up falling everywhere and leaves a mess but i gotta clean anyways no bully XD

https://streamable.com/e7h2hi

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What happens if I, as a 30 something MEF man who looks and acts rather creepy, bad social skills, dodgy eyes, noticeably dead inside, quiet, etc, pay a group of 10-15 women 18 to 22 years old who routinely hang out with each other to include me as one of them, not necessarily crossdressing or anything but to be friendly and maybe sometimes treat me like I'm one of the girls. Could that work? I mean I can act somewhat more friendly and happy to make it less awkward. I suppose I can somewhat make it work, but my masculinity will be very palpable and distinct from their energy, as I am rational, rather violent, fast paced, conceptual, etc.

What is interesting about them is that they function as groups, their youth makes it more emasculating to be a part of them since they are more retarded, and there's this almost intoxicating stupidity and hormonal freedom and air that will in some way affect me psychologically. To be a part of this strange borg of chaotic and fun impulsivity as even somewhat of an included member would be quite an interesting experiment.

What do you guys think? Even if theoretically, not necessarily like I'm actually going to do it, but imagine I had a ton of money to do it and was actually going to go through with it. Or not me but someone of similar characteristics.

>>43076002
It sounds good in principle, but you won't have a situation handed to you that easily.

>>43076868
can you see a scenario, where this could happen without the money part? maybe joining a hobby group or nursing program while having a therapist direct how im supposed to act to be accepted

>>43075834
You're satanic. You're corrupting childhood innocence. You're like a symbolic pedophile.

>>43077508
actually this is a really good way to think. but I think you should continue your days as usual while reminding yourself of what you want. you have to keep a level of autonomy. mental change before physical.
>>43075834
cute

i want a transbian girlfriend also into this that i can explore it with god i want to experience it so badly pleaaassee

>>43078742
it’s interesting i have this strong mef desire despite knowing i was trans since i was 10

>>43077899
yeah i get that vibe a lot. it seems to be becoming more real and less sexual as time goes on though. cause at the end of the day i am here most of the day.
>>43078548
ty

I posted way too many way too personal things here last night. Netanyahu, if you are reading this, I will support Israel if you expunge my posts from the Palantir archives.
Thank you for your attention on this matter!

>>43073720
>but the idea of being with a man as a man made me too dysphoric to accept.
i can relate to this

Tonight I have the first date with a man.
I guess the "gay coping" phase can begin.

>>43071034
Yes that would be ideal

finally having a word to summarize my strange feelings is so nice if only i knew this years ago

>>43084330
Are you transitioned MEF?

>be me
>kinda bi from the debut of puberty
>puberty kinda weak
>only date girls
>get gf at 16
>she leaves me at 18
>get new gf
>things work gr8
>talk of marriage at 20
>leaves me at the behest of her ultrareligious family
>try to date men
>realize I'm gigasub
>but feel bad about being a bottom dude
>try to cope dating another woman
>this isn't working
>get bf at 22
>now 23 and injecting estrogen and taking AAs
it's over, isn't it?

>>43084642
The fate of every sub man. It's just not compatible.

>>43084651
>The fate of every sub man
I don't think so. The sub dude I dated 2 years ago is still not trooning and is fine.
Tbhon, I'm fine too, I just suddenly want to be a woman. I don't even fit with trannies. They all have long stories of dysphoria while I'm like... I am trooning because it's hot. And no longer being a man puts a huge smile on my face.

>>43084679
Would you want to be a woman if you weren't sub?

>>43084709
IDK. Maybe?
What if at puberty I didn't repress bisexuality but MEF? Fuck knows, really.

>>43084721
For me, it's clear. I don't want to dominate or penetrate anyone. But I am attracted to women. Women don't want sub men. So the attraction gets inverted...

>>43084831
>So the attraction gets inverted...
Sounds very agp.
Quite unfortunate you're not into men. I am reading some other nonas' stories on how they increased their androphilia to make this work and it's fascinating.
Again, I had no problem attracting women. But now I don't want to anymore. I want to be one and be with men.

>>43084948
>Quite unfortunate you're not into men
I only have meta attraction, yeah.
If you are sub, you can never enjoy a woman as a dom man would.

>>43085020
>I only have meta attraction
If the other nonas are right, that can be fixed.
I mean, I also thought I only had meta attraction from age 13 until I actually started dating men at 20.
>If you are sub, you can never enjoy a woman as a dom man would
Probably. Idk and I doubt I'll get to test it again. If my transition fails, then I'll hrt femboy cope or something. But never dating afabs again. Not even sad about it, desu.

>>43085111
>If the other nonas are right, that can be fixed.
It's an exciting thought for sure. It doesn't even require MEF for me, it still works as a part of becoming a woman.

>>43085020
So many cases of bisexual men who are actually straight bottoms

>>43085111
What's wrong with AFABs besides no dick?

>>43085173
I can see the link between being straight bottom and coping with autogynephilia.

>>43085232
It actually makes me wonder too, but I think people fall too

>>43085232
>>43085298
It actually makes me wonder too, but I think people fall too easily in the trap of explaining everything with AGP

>>43085184
My androphilia increased a lot in the last 3 years. And growing even more as I transition and lean into MEF.
I plan to be done with transitioning by 2030 at the latest. But the more I'm feminizing my behaviors and my mind, the more I relate to AFABs as objects of envy rather than sexual attraction.

>>43084831
Have you considered dommy trans girls?
>>43084948
Personally I'm a gynephile first, meta-attracted narcissist second. I wouldn't change that no matter what

>>43067942
I'm in much the same position anon, except I wanted to be a programmer instead of an artist. You should try to at least get some part time work. Having some money will make you feel a bit better. The drudgery of my current job makes it easier to try and focus on improving my life, there wasn't the same pressure when I was a neet.

>>43085309
It explains me too well. Like why else would nonhomosexual sub male find being a woman so appealing except getting to enjoy the preferred sexual role?
>>43085359
I am not GAMP, so I guess not.

>>43084365
sorry late reply, im trans on hrt but still presenting as a guy for now, but yes i have mef for sure

>>43085720
I heard MEF appears when you rep

bump

>>43086209
perhaps i’ll know on the other side when im out, the desire to look at the “guy turns into a girl” smut that i’ve had since being like 10 went away almost immediately after starting hrt though. just into it because having someone call me a complete failure of a man and bullying me for it seems really hot

>>43087298
nta
>just into it because having someone call me a complete failure of a man and bullying me for it seems really hot
It is hot, if you're MEF.
It also helps to have a man remind you of that.

>>43087298
It's indeed hot

>>43082669
Update: hooo-leeee-shit.
It's over. I actually am one of you people.
Don't know if to feel sad or euphoric.

>>43087298
the idea of being fucked and getting teased for doing everything i can to get rid of masculine aspects of myself just so i can be a little faggot for someone gets me going so much, also the idea of someone forcing me to get rid of masculine aspects since there’s only one real man and it’s him kffjfnfnfn needddd

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>>43067774
spreading the word

>>43087357
<3 Iove it

>>43087332
Can't help being a silly girl

>>43087332
i find it hard to relate to men socially a lot of the time like i do see myself as a woman, i never understood the appeal of guys but i can understand the dominance aspect and i do like dick lol, i don’t think im conventionally attracted to men though (could be the meta attraction thing idk) i don’t find men’s physical features attractive i just imagine getting used by them sometimes but i only find women attractive

>>43087347
Go on. Why wold you feel sad?

>>43087385
I don't see myself as a woman but I can't relate to men at all

>>43087367
>Can't help being a silly girl
Well, I'm older. So I definitely don't do the silly girl act anymore.
But I melt when he reminds me I'm not complete (haven't had srs yet) and then bends me over.
>>43087354
>there’s only one real man and it’s him
It's also true in my case.
>the idea of someone forcing me to get rid of masculine aspects
Him bullying me for my estrogenized pp is fuel for the srs waitlist, unironically.

>>43087354
>>43087546
>there’s only one real man and it’s him
That's so hot....

>>43087508
i don’t think it’s a fundamental thing in what makes you trans but also idk how to explain what makes you trans its just something ive always known. its weird though im only thinking of men specifically for dominant sexual things and then im more conventionally attracted to women (happy to be dominant/switch with them) but obviously mef kind of requires a guy so that’s one of the main appeals for me

>>43087546
> But I melt when he reminds me I'm not complete (haven't had srs yet) and then bends me over.
> Him bullying me for my estrogenized pp is fuel for the srs waitlist, unironically.


GIWTWM that’s so insanely hot nona i want that dynamic so bad

>>43087612
adding on to this i wish there was an srs method that let you have both i would totally do that, giving up my dick seems very hard though because im a switch at best. would absolutely love to have a vagina though, i wish someday it was possible.. willing to ditch the balls if absolutely necessary to do that i guess

in some ways i think having a pp is evidence of how much of a failure of a “man” i am for my parents lol but willingly getting srs is the ultimate declaration of leaving masculinity which you could be bullied a lot over so idk, just wish i could have both

>>43087653
It exists. It's called salmacian

>>43087559
Again, in my case it's absolutely true.
I'm 171cm, small frame, long hair, wear glasses, fem voice due to failed puberty, never even jerked off, now can't even if I want to, have tits and been living as a woman for a year now.
Meanwhile, he's 184cm, standard working class look, authoritative voice and is a technician.
The fact that I believed I was a man till age 23 is in itself part of the joke atp.
Unfortunate that I didn't meet him then but I sure do consider myself lucky to have such an amazing man alongside me.

>>43087671
i’ve seen a pic of that doesn’t that just give you a hole that doesn’t look like a vagina? at least that’s what i saw on reddit but that is reddit after all

>>43087580
Idk I deal with gender dysphoria since adolescen and possibly childhood depending on how you define it, but I'm unsure if I can separate it from MEF

>>43087686
I thought it was like any SRS?

>>43087653
>willingly getting srs is the ultimate declaration of leaving masculinity which you could be bullied a lot over so
That's one part I'm looking forward to.
But also the sheer logistics. Prep takes too much. I wanna get fucked on his whim (and sometimes on my whim too).
It's also practical, outside of fetish reasons. Since now I womanmode full time, I want to womanmode at the beach too. And be able to travel.
>im a switch at best
I pegged him several times with a strapon. He liked it and mocked me for needing the strapon. Then he reminded me that he doesn't need one.
Also, I want to receive oral from him. And that's simply not possible now. Failed men don't get oral. Women do, if they're good.

>>43087704
seems like there’s varying results, a bit hard to find a lot of pictures on reddit, i’ll investigate it more though thank you :) hopefully in years when i would even be at the stage of my life id be ready for something like that it’s more developed, for me since a kid the “press a magical button to be what you want” thing has been fully a woman but with penis and vagina, don’t think i would ever feel comfortable getting rid of my penis. but thank you nona that’s very interesting :)

>>43087751
ive never really done things (uncomfortable with having sex “as a guy”) but being penetrated vaginally seems way better than anally

and… of course it would be hot to be bullied over it by a non failure of a guy :) good luck with it nona im so jealous of your life

>then be reminded me he doesn’t need one

HOTTT

>failed men don’t get oral. women do, if they’re good.

HOT AGAIN god it’s nice to find other people into this I wish this thread existed before thank you to whoever made this
your dynamic is insanely hot nona i hope you keep getting bullied over being raised as someone’s son and instead turning out to be a very good girl for him <3

>>43087479
Because I know this doesn't go away.
And after tonight's date I know I hit the point of no return. Not that I had many doubts by this point, desu.
Luckily, I have a marketable skill so I won't be in trouble financially. And I can be indifferent to my family's reaction too. But it will still be a hassle.
Otoh, there's no way without it. I'm a woman. I must become what I am.
Navigating this process is scary. But it's also euphoric in its own way. I'm not even angry. Except maybe for the fact that it will take quite a while.

>>43087889
MEF doesn't mean becoming a woman tho? Unless you're also dysphoric then forget what I'm saying

>>43087859
>you keep getting bullied over being raised as someone’s son and instead turning out to be a very good girl for him
yeah, that doesn't land. My dad was the least surprised person when I told him.
I'm a liiitle bit upset with him because apparently I was fembrained right from the get go. But, otoh, starting early would not have been feasible in my country so it's water under the bridge atp.
However, my brother had a rage episode. Lowkey I bully him that he failed to forcemasc me hehe.
>being penetrated vaginally seems way better than anally
Yep. Except for the recovery period. But that's the price paid for being a failed male.
More seriously, being penetrated anally is in a way a rite of passage. You don't realize how much of a not-a-man you are until you're penetrated and enjoy it but without an erection.
>uncomfortable with having sex “as a guy”
the only I could do it is bottoming. But when my previous bf tried to blow me I couldn't look. It was over before I knew it, lol.

>>43087895
>MEF doesn't mean becoming a woman tho?
It kinda does if I want it in practice. How do I become not-a-man? I am clearly not a man.
>unless you're also dysphoric then forget what I'm saying
Kinda. I don't even know. But I won't dwell much on that. I'm results-focused. I want what I want.
Ofc, I'll think about it more after a good sleep. I have a lot to process.

>>43087970
My point is that it can stay as a fantasy in the bed unless you're dysphoric

>>43087984
>it can stay as a fantasy in the bed
I'll have to look it up if I can get srs without transition. That would be the only way I could have a theoretical chance of managing this without social disruption.
Though, even then, I kinda do want nicer hair and some breasts.
I know I have a lot to think about.

Is there a way to psyop myself into mef as an unironic transmaxxer?

>>43087938
fair enough we love supportive parents
>failed to forcemasc me
ultimate comeback lol
>that’s the price of being a failed male
hot LOL but yes deserved… and after it you can never go back to being a man even if you tried (not like anyone here ever could lmao)
>you don’t realize how much of a not-a-man you are until you’re penetrated and enjoy it but without an erection
desu ive literally never put anything up there but my curiousity has increased lol might need to start doing prog to get me in the mood. huge fan of handless orgasms though so if it leads to that i am all in
>i couldn’t look
yeah that’s when you know it’s over LOL at least until you can get eaten out someday perhaps

>>43088020
Sounds like you should just transition then

>>43088031
probably just get off to a bunch of mef porn and eventually your brain will connect it with pleasure

>>43067774
mef isn't real

>>43087354
The idea of being 'forced' is so strong, its a shame that my secretive nature has let me hide all of these feelings from the world for so long. at the end of the day, all of the embarassing outfits and complete body shaves were me being directed by myself. Just the thought of being bullied or coerced into the bunnysuit is... yeah... it makes my brain feel stupid in a really good way.
I like to fantasize about a competition or bet that i lose thoroughly, as a form of definite 'proof' of inferiority.

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>>43088031
Sissy hypno or forcefem stories

>>43088037
>>failed to forcemasc me
>ultimate comeback lol
It's also kinda true. He really tried to get me into stuff. I enjoyed his company (still do, my bro is nice, even tho he raged about me trooning) but not the activities.
>and after it you can never go back to being a man even if you tried
That's another reason to want it.
> huge fan of handless orgasms
It's the only way I can orgasm, other than vibrator.
>at least until you can get eaten out someday perhaps
Realistically in about a year. I'm scheduled for surgery this autumn. Recovery will suck but I should be able to use it in 6 months or so.
The only fear (heh, not really) is that he'll bully me during recovery. And hump me. He's such a good man for being ready to be patient with me.
Still, I gotta practice blowjobs more from a more comfortable position. The first few months after srs I will not be easily able to get on my knees.

>>43088101
yes having some kind of outside force to “force” you into doing things is always such a need, although of course deep down you want them too

>>43088050
Got any concrete suggestions?
I'm already stealth but still pre-op. Being more mef-y would definitely help me mentally to process srs.
I'm getting it anyway but this seems like a way to also enjoy it more.
>>43088109
It's hard to find hypno that works on me.
For reference, I'm 8yrs into hrt and stealth. I also have a bf but he's not into forcefem. He also says I'm fem already and can't bring himself to bully me over my dick.

>>43088140
Dream relationship of two MEF-AGP's who both hate each other and at least want to the other to fall first, who compete to gradually embarrass and 'fem each other.

>>43088031
>>43088145
>unironic transmaxxer
If you are who I think you are, just switch to the mentality that you trooned because you are a failed male loser but you're struggling because you still have that weird appendix instead of being a normal girl.
Also, when you have sex, remind yourself that it's the only way the boy is out of you. You need your bf to fuck the boy out of you.
Again, if you are that incel transmaxxer, then you already did everything else perfectly so you don't need any advice.

>>43088170
That's unstable though. They need a real man to guide 'em at some point.

>>43067774
Gaming so boring now. More interested in clothing, skincare, and being in public if that makes sense? I want to try light makeup daily, but unsure.

>>43088111
>my bro is nice
good to see family come around eventually and not be evil about things
>it’s the only way i can orgasm
total dedication to the bottom lifestyle your boyfriend is very lucky
>scheduled this autumn
CONGRATS and good luck nona!! it really is magic that such a surgery exists i hope you enjoy being your true self (as such a little faggot failed male that you gave yourself a new hole <3) but really always nice to see a trans happy ending :)

>he’ll bully me during recovery
your boyfriend seems absolutely wonderful so wholesome
>blowjobs from a more comfortable position
never thought of this as an srs recovery side effect but makes sense
all good to know if i ever decide to go that route

>>43088170
that is my absolute dream and having a real man come in at some point god i need this if i dream about it enough surely it’ll come true eventually

>>43088194
Rules:
1. Be always dolled up.
2. Don't overthink.
3. Be vulnerable.

>>43088191
we get to that point when we get to that point! i'm brainstorming a semi-realistic was to end up coerced into feminization here. We don't get to be picky. grr.

>>43088187
>i hate that transgenderism has anything to do with modern culture
i agree and my goal is to just be a woman with publicly and keep the trans side of it to trusted people. cannot deal with boomers watching ai videos of pink haired grown men that they imagine trans women to be

i hope you feel better anon, hugs

>>43088170
>>43088191>>43088230
one of the hottest scenarios i’ve ever read this will be incorporated into my yearning

>>43088224
I am wearing men's clothing, but in smaller sizes than usual. Today I wore short shorts out. It felt weird at first, but then I felt good as I stopped thinking.

Are there any words for opposites of MEF? Think something like gentle feminization of the more dominant party? Feminization as a mean to increase your respectability in the relationship and society at large?

I'm surprised everyone here wants to be women instead of emasculated boys

>>43088234
I mean overall. I would have fully repressed forever if it wasn't such a mainstream thing.

>>43088271
It's the same. MEF doesn't have to be humiliating or distressing, you just get turned on by the source of your trauma (emasculation)

>>43088245
I just try to dress nice and fashionable while signaling I'm a failed man

>>43088198
>total dedication to the bottom lifestyle
96% of all women are submissive. who am I to break such an absolute consensus?
>gave yourself a new hole
Ideally, it becomes the hole. Unless he really wants my butt from time to time, I'd rather not do anal anymore.
Also, if I happen to be one of those whose sex drive increases after srs, then it becomes dangerous to keep doing anal lol.
>never thought of this as an srs recovery side effect
Every single nona I talked with about this (happy or unhappy with the result) mentioned not being to walk or move too much for 3-4 months.
I can't leave my man chaste for that long. Heck, I need a bit of action too. I'm getting myself dickless but to also live without dick around me for half a year? That's just too much.
>it really is magic that such a surgery exists
i fucking love science, unironically.
>trans happy ending
the happy ending will be when/if he puts a ring on me :3
which I expect he will. He's been accelerating my transition and been so gentle for the last 2 years that I really think we're going to stick around together for a long time.
Without his emotional support I'd still be manmoding and probably would've gotten srs in 2027.

Should MEFs transition?

>>43088309
Many (most?) do. Quite a few don't.
It's an individual thing, really.

>>43088309
It depends on dysphoria altho some people here claim they did it entirely due to MEF but idk

>>43088245
The struggle to retain the masculinity is important. Even if deep down you want to lose it, the failed struggle to retain is the indisputable evidence of emasculation.
That said, i need less yearners and more hateable jerks that aren't nearly as cool or masculine as they think they are..! and need to be taken down a peg!

>>43088299
>ideally, it becomes the hole
wow this is really hot you have a way with words nona, the idea of giving urself a new hole and framing it as being part of submitting to a real man is so hot
>3-4 months
damn i should look into this more im like a tranny expert at this point except for srs since i never intended to get it lol, i hope science develops so i can get exactly the kind i want
>i fucking love science
me too im so happy i live now and not in the past idk what id do without things like diy, also vfs sounds great to do i found out about that last thread
>puts a ring on me
aww nona thats so beautiful i really hope he does!! you seem like you have a wonderful relationship together
i hope for the best!! and for him to try his best to get his little failure of a male pregnant after he proposes <3

>>43088316
>dysphoria
What does this even mean anymore. What kind of person should actually transition?

I'm this anon >>43088187
and I'm seriously struggling with my identity and it's affecting my overall life. I transed for 2 years and stopped the last 2 months

>>43088494
transition fixes dysphoria but it wont fix the other things on its own. but at least for me it helps me to be happy and a lot more socially outgoing which makes everything feel better, also having real emotions is very nice

it used to be to come up with words to describe this feeling it’s good there’s a word now since apparently it is not just me with this feeling

>>43067774
I had to google what MEF meant

I hope you girls aren't still pretending like your gender is shameful, wrong, or an adaptation to trauma suffered as a man

I can't imagine that seeing yourself that way could be good for your mental health.

>>43089844
>adaptation to trauma suffered as a man
What else could it be? I doubt there are much "I want to be a woman" people who really like being men.

>>43090474
it's that you were always psychologically female and you cannot live a happy life as a man. All trauma suffered is actually downstream of this fact. You can't bully people into changing their fucking gender identity.

>>43090486
Define psychologically female?

>>43075834
can you post it again? I wanna see how other MEFs decorate their rooms...

>>43090940
https://streamable.com/ccfnek

>>43090486
But I can't see myself as a woman... On the other hand, I suffered from debilitating biochemical dysphoria that got immediate solved with HRT

>>43092331
How are those two possible

>>43092337
What do you mean

>>43092357
You don't consider yourself a woman and yet you have dysphoria from not being one?

>>43092331
well your gonna have to start seeing yourself as a female bc that's what you are- you know this

>>43092408
I always feel resistance lol

>>43090486
nta
>You can't bully people into changing their fucking gender identity.
uh, but I kinda lowkey did that to myself.
>>43089844
>I hope you girls aren't still pretending like your gender is shameful, wrong, or an adaptation to trauma suffered as a man
Of course not. But being a failed male is shameful tho :3

>>43094363
How did you bully yourself, I wish to learn that skill

>>43088400
>also vfs sounds great to do
Maybe some time in the future. Never being able to do a male voice sounds like a good idea.

>>43092051
so cute!

do make sure to keep everything perfectly clean though, white looks really bad with any imperfections

>>43094395
Behavioral therapy. Self-imposed. A year and a half of volceldom in which I dug deep beyond the acceptance that I am at best a failed male but in reality I'll never be a man.
Socially moved to fagmoding, and when I ended the volcel period dated only masc men. By then I was half year into actively feminizing my mind, mannerisms, behaviors, voice and some (but not all) of my presentation.
In the meantime I stopped jerking off, got deep into homo and sissy affirmation and got on bica (low dose and then gradually grew it). By year two I was having bottom dysphoria.
Discipline and neurplasticity, really. Feels performative at first but then gradually becomes second nature and eventually first nature.

>>43094771
Extremely hot. How does stopping jerking off help with it? I feel I'd be insanely horny if I stopped.

Am I MEF if I find being a failed male hot?

i trooned out almost a decade ago now, but I think I just psyoped myself into thinking I was a tranny as a kid and then became so scared of becoming a john 50 that I never grew out of it, I'm very malebrained but living as a woman for 4 years + 10 years HRT has helped me acclimate, like I saw a video of myself recently and thought "holy fuck and act nothing like the men..."

>>43094890
>Am I MEF if I find being a failed male hot?
Without any doubt.

>>43094497
t-thank you. and yes i gotta clean more lmao.

>>43094907
well I guess i'm an evil MEFfy then :/ but I don't regret psyoping myself like this :)

>>43095029
Of course you don't regret it. You have a boyfriend who puts you in your place?

>>43095048
not yet unfortunately... I feel really ashamed that I don't have one

>>43094771
what gave you a desire to transition and do that? since it seems like you’re saying your desire to transition came before having dysphoria

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This mental sickness makes me so fucking angry that it even exists because of how absurd and ridiculous it is

>oh nyo haha daddy was never home and your male friends would hit you for having a small dick and being weird guess its time to wear girls clothes and let bigger men cum inside you

I wish i was normal

>>43094847
>How does stopping jerking off help with it?
Disassociates the action from pleasure. Jerking off is for men. So are erections.
>I feel I'd be insanely horny if I stopped
I didn't say I stopped masturbating. Quite the opposite.
Vibrators and dildos. Learned to orgasm without an erection or touching it. That eventually led to bottom dysphoria an wanting srs.
>what gave you a desire to transition and do that?
Just gave in to the fetish. I never deeply analyzed the source of the fetish (I still don't care). I just wanted what I wanted.
>you’re saying your desire to transition came before having dysphoria
Yes. Would I have been able to fully transition without this step? Likely, yes.
But it sure helped because now I'm just a regular straight woman. Still kinda sorta mefy but I "soulpass" as well. If I hadn't intentionally created dysphoria I probably would've never been able to see myself as a woman but some variation of hsts. Not that it'd have been something wrong with that, but it wouldn't have fit the fetish.
Knowing that I used to be a boy is what makes life (and especially sex life) enjoyable for me now.

>>43094890
>Am I MEF if I find being a failed male hot?
Yes.
>I'm very malebrained but living as a woman for 4 years + 10 years HRT has helped me acclimate
You can further delve into it or enjoy the current state. Up to you.
Socializing (nearly) exclusively with cisfs helps a lot with learning the minutiae. Fake it till you make it works.
Also, having a boyfriend to submit to accelerates the process in a way it can't easily be described in writing. Especially if he's more masc and wider/bigger.
Have you had srs?
>I think I just psyoped myself into thinking I was a tranny as a kid and then became so scared of becoming a john 50 that I never grew out of it
giwtwm. I spent my teen years thinking I'll be a man, lol.

>>43095412
I wish I didn't envy women to the point of wanting to be one because of failing to be a man for them.

>>43095029
>I guess i'm an evil MEFfy then :/
What's evil is to continue to pretend you're not a failed male and try to larp as a real man.
>I don't regret psyoping myself like this
Unironically I think we have the lowest regret rate of all transwomen. Precisely because we wanted all of it just because we wanted it.
>boyfriend
After so many years? You're doing something wrong, nona.
Also, you need a man to fuck the boy out of you.

>>43095564
competing with them is easier than competing for them, though :3
also, my man wouldn't have wanted a cisf that much anyway. So we both get what we want.

>>43095599
So it works for you as an advantage after all? Damn, if you make me a bit more envious I might break down.

>>43095666
I won some and lost some. I like the outcome, of course. But I'm also biased because I accepted a long time ago I would've never made it as a man.
The disadvantages are slightly lower physical strength (higher than cisf median but lower than men's median), more time spent on appearance and some de facto restrictions (I can't easily do some activities that men do easier as I became very selfconscious and a lot more fembrained over time).
Also, the cost of the project and the post-srs recovery were also not fun.
But, on the upside, I get to be a professional woman (who, yes, do get treated better than professional men, and especially better than failed men), I get to live my sex fantasies almost daily without the disadvantages of cisfs and overall have a chiller life (the dirty little secret is that testosterone is poison for the mind too, not just the body).
It's not for everyone, clearly. My man finds it hot on me but would find it terrifying on him. And that's precisely right. He's a real man, I'm not.
Overall the role fits me well, despite some inconveniences. And as I grow older, I'm even more convinced I made the right choice.

can someone here bully me into putting on that bunnysuit that i bought (but am too embarrassed to wear)?
It was a moment of weakness, but i don't really want to wear it, i'm not a fag...

>>43095855
You don't need a bunny suit. You need a man.

>>43095855
just do it, you'll probably feel really cute, and it'd be a shame to let all that money go to waste, right? <3

also think about the future! how are you supposed to progress with your feminization if you can't even wear a pretty bunny suit in the comfort of your own bedroom?

>>43095841
I never had much physical strength, so that part would be easiest for me. I struggle with expectations, stereotypes and sexual role of a man. The result is overall a failure. I never wanted to be good at it and I am sure I would not miss it.

>>43095412
real
it's even worse because my brother (who got way more attention from my dad) turned out to be a total tanned gigachad...

>>43095926
>expectations
I still achieved what I wanted financially.
>stereotypes
A lot do suck. But ultimately I girlboss at work so it's not like I quite fit all feminine stereotypes either. But that's okay, most cisfs don't either.
>sexual role of a man
Yeah, that's the part I really didn't want. Even when I tried to gay cope it didn't quite feel right. Even as a gigabottom, you're still expected to be a man and take it like a man.
I'm glad I gay coped (all mefs should, imo) because that cemented the path.

>>43095903
... okay fineeee ;.:
I'm wearing it now.. i look so dumb though. with a collar and cuffs and bunny ears. Like, i'm spending money to end up looking like this. Just here in my room blushing like an idiot..

I dont understand how you are supposed to talk to or relate to women at all every single woman I meet wants me homeless and dead because i was born wrong

do you think watching this kinda stuff can sissify me over time https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgNMuSPbUj0

>>43096155
>every single woman I meet wants me homeless and dead because i was born wrong
Don't live in the UK.
I'm a well traveled woman. Only in the UK are women so fucking hateful and insane as an absolute norm.

>>43096146
i bet you look adorable ^_^
i wish i had a bunny suit, maybe I should buy one

>>43095412
counterpoint: who cares

you don't need to ruin your mental health worrying about failing to meet unfair arbitrary social expectations that don't even apply to you anymore just live your life however you want

>>43096223
don't. save yourself. It's embarassing to picture other people in this thread dressed normally and then the camera pans over to me and i'm dressed like a serving girl... Men reallly shouldn't have bunny tails _-_
why would you want that

>>43096283
damn im cured of a lifetime of trauma now thanks doc

>>43096313
nta but the other anon is correct.
the path to improvement really does start with "who cares?" because ultimately life is too short to be entirely lived for other people.

>>43096220
I live in the US and every single instance I've been hate crimed in my life has been by cis women for being a faggot because they get really angry and want men to only pay attention to them. I don't even see men and women as the same species.

>>43095564
Relatable https://youtu.be/ATa-ZGPQrH4?si=MjsRWWjIH-RZSvN9

>>43096354
>I live in the US
Just bigger UK, desu.
Angloids are really weird.
It is true though that the source of nearly all homophobia is women. It's just that angloids are far worse than the global median.
One reason cisfs like me is that they get to learn to something from me too. I learned a lot from them how to woman. But I also tell them how great men are.

>>43096207
There is a nona that sometimes drops by here (see previous threads where she gave examples) who insists korean shit is useful for mental feminization.
Personally that would've never worked on me because I don't like nearly anything Asian anyway (least of all korean/jap/chinese).
To me it was (and is) all sexual. So basic bitch sissy stuff worked a lot better. Like this: https://hypnotube.com/video/a-guide-to-sissification-beginner-first-steps-10839.html

>>43096415
That shit in the vid always made me feel kinda depressed. It looks so fake.

>>43096415
its sexual for me as well but for some reason i was never into sex stuff so i fetishize like changes in behavior (my main fetish growing up was being a part of a girls friend group) or maybe sexual stuff like being desired by men but not much sex acts themselves. i enjoy those vids though as well.

>>43096415
i couldn't ever do hypno since it seems really funny to me tbhon

>>43096645
oh yeah it is really silly (and cringe!) but that can kinda be it's own appeal. Some 'man' turns on the dumbest thing you could imagine and his brain's so weak that suddenly she's locked herself up and started dressing in pink

>>43096645
hypno is really fun when you push past the cringe and get to stop thinking

>>43096569
>It looks so fake
Yes. But if you follow the instructions and just change/add behaviors irl and stay disciplined, the brain does slowly shift.
Masturbating with a vibrator and ceasing jerking off is hot but doesn't feel like it's doing anything the first time. Or the first 10 times. But coupling that with regular affirmations in your headphones daily, in 2-3 months you'll start be upset at yourself that you even thought about it. It slowly becomes just habit to look for the vibe/dildo (or both :3) when you want to play with yourself.
Also, here's a more real one: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph632d4d0088c6c
>>43096586
>so i fetishize like changes in behavior
how you play with yourself is a behavior. And changing that is a hack into your brain to allow other changes too.
once I saw myself even a liiitle bit feminine sexually, then I found it much easier to change lot of other (non sexual) behaviors and habits.
>or maybe sexual stuff like being desired by men
Men who are into women like us for some reason usually sense how we feel about ourselves. Maybe it's their bisexuality, idk.
What I do know is that the exact same guys treated me way different when I signalled and felt like a failed male than when I had accepted feminization. Didn't change nearly anything in visual presentation, but my behaviors were enough for them to clock me.
>but not much sex acts themselves
You'll change your mind if you pursue this.
Meta-attraction is a necessary step, but it's not the final destination.

>>43096823
>Also, here's a more real one: https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph632d4d0088c6c
lol wtf is this

>>43096843
She's a hon, but the instructions are good.

>>43096857
I think if you want something like that to listen to it's better to get hypnosis files or something that's not just porn

>>43096903
Both and more, imo.
I was very malebrained so needed very specific instructions and actionable advice.

>>43096772
Is it even helpful tho?

>>43096988
getting super stoned and listening to a specfic few Kei hypno files that resonated with me is how I broke through my male identity. It was the way I was able to access femininity and feel something feminine for once.

It's still work to change yourself after, but this can at least provide the opportunity to make contact.

>>43088181
>If you are who I think you are
oh shit, I got clocked.
>just switch to the mentality that you trooned because you are a failed male loser
This is the truth unironically.
>but you're struggling because you still have that weird appendix instead of being a normal girl
Uh. But how do I get to that state of mind?
I read through the thread and it seems zero usage helps. I am not topping him anyway (8yrs on hrt makes that kinda difficult) but maybe I can reframe that as hot in itself even if he doesn't want to "bully" me over it.
I should probably stop touching it during sex too.
>You need your bf to fuck the boy out of you
Right. And that only works if I have a srussy.
>>43087751
>Failed men don't get oral. Women do
Oh, this should be easy. He sometimes tries to blow me and it's already kinda odd. I could simply shift the mind that I don't deserve it. It'd be a good excuse to blow him more.

bought some makeup that is simple enough for daily wear.

>>43097859
Tell us more. or post pic (of the make up, not your face).

>>43096823
hmm vid was hot but why do you think sexuality is so pivotal to acting more girly or being accepted into girls social groups?

>>43098016
>why do you think sexuality is so pivotal to acting more girly
Because sexuality is our most vulnerable moment/state. The brain is far more susceptible to new suggestions during horny.
Also, physiologically, orgasming without jerking off (like this for instance https://www.tranny.one/view/1177925/ ) changes the way you experience pnc. After jerking off, T levels spike. After orgasming without jerking off, T levels raise less. In time, the brain gets used to less T while you're "shouting" to it that you're a woman. In time, pnc gets smoother and different - not quite feminine, but definitely a lot less masculine.
Eventually I wanted to replicate that feeling everywhere. And that made it easier and more enjoyable to slowly "emasculate" my behaviors.

>>43098138
I just think of myself as a failed boy to remove the mental barriers for feminity and to stop forcing myself to engage into social expectations of masculinity

>>43098188
>failed boy to remove the mental barriers for feminity
That works if you already have some semblance of feminine identity already. Still, even that needs polishing.
>stop forcing myself to engage into social expectations of masculinity
To get there you need take a tiny step from the "failed boy" box and into "escaping boyhood" box. You don't need to force yourself to engage into social expectations of masculinity if you're not quite a boy anymore.
Idk, this worked really well for me. Perhaps too well since I enjoyed it.

>>43098298
>That works if you already have some semblance of feminine identity already. Still, even that needs polishing
I see it as the first step to start exploring your feminine identity.
>To get there you need take a tiny step from the "failed boy" box and into "escaping boyhood" box.
Perhaps it's just my perspective but I see them as the same.
>social expectations of masculinity if you're not quite a boy anymore.
Idk, this worked really well for me. Perhaps too well since I enjoyed it.
Yeah it worked great for me too

>>43096988
>>43097235
lol yeah I personally kind of bounced off of kei because the audio effects were too much, but bambi while high is super fun

>get dressed nicely for an event
>feel nothing as I look in the mirror
>everyone at the event compliments me
>look at myself in the mirror naked
>eh, kinda ugly but feminine, feel mostly nothing
>get fucked in front of the mirror
>holy shit, yeah!
I'm really weird. The only time I'm agp is when I engage sexually. Oh well. Now I get why mefy girls want stable boyfriends/husbands. I thought you were larping but I get it now.

>>43098644
Then maybe your AGP isn't about visuals but about experiences

>>43098661
I guess?
I feel great during sex, but having him fuck me while I look in the mirror was a whole different thing. Like I suddenly loved everything with an intensity never felt before. Also significantly hornier (which he deeply appreciated, no pun intended).

>>43097310
>oh shit, I got clocked
Sowwy :3
>I should probably stop touching it during sex too
Nona, that's 101 stuff. I'm surprised.
You only get to rub if you got an srussy. Failed boys just shut up an take it. Sex is over when he is done. You can finish with a vibrator later. Or, if he's nice, he may help.
Good luck. Ygmi. If anyone can make it, it's you.

i find it hard to be attracted to men but deep down being someone's girl sounds really calming. not like ive ever accomplished anything dating wise anyway so failed male probably fits

>>43099701
Appetite comes with eating. You increase your attraction to men by being around them more while knowing your place.
Socialize with gay and bi men, feminize your mind and behaviors, be intentional about things.
When I was where you are I was always explicitly kinder, softer and huggy with masc men that I found endearing. I took rejections as motivation to become more fem and signal better.

>>43099763
did you start out with a desire to be dominated and then develop attraction from it? for me like i like dick but stuff like body and facial hair is a big turnoff
and deep down i still delusionally think that topping a woman is my preference but that has yet to happen once
it's just the idea of "being with a man" feels weird somehow but then the idea of being made a guy's girly little toy and being bullied and humiliated by him over it is really hot

>>43099819
>did you start out with a desire to be dominated and then develop attraction from it?
Pretty much. The road from meta-attraction to truly loving men was pretty long but I enjoyed it just as much I enjoy the outcome.
I accepted that the only way I can enjoy sex (and masturbation desu) is being penetrated. And then took steps to end up in that position (both literally and mentally).
>stuff like body and facial hair is a big turnoff
That served as a motivation for me to feminize my body more. The contrast itself becomes hot. He's a real man, you are not.
The first man I was with was kinda hairy and I believed similar to you. But once I got on my knees to blow him, I almost instinctively got my hands through his hairy chest and it didn't take long to find that hot especially as he leaned to pat my (then) pathetic nipples.
>the idea of being made a guy's girly little toy and being bullied and humiliated by him over it is really hot
men into forcefem are far more common than women into forcefem. That's why mef only truly works in tandem with androphilia (in addition to the fact that failed boys need a real man).
However, to find and attract one you still need to take steps yourself. Just like cis women don't find their prince charming by just waiting and fantasizing, the same is true for failed boys and mefy transwomen.
If you want that, you have to signal it and trigger that impulse into real men who are into that.

>>43096155
>Be me
>Practicing choreos like usual
>Suddenly mind wanders thinking what itd be like to do it with girls to teach them or learn from them
>Almost end up in a flashback where it all gets very awkward
>Some backhand compliment my skills after that don't dare showing my face or trying that again

>>43100039
>i enjoyed it just as much
interesting, the process does seem fun
>and then took steps to end up in that position
hot <3 i suppose that wouldnt be hard for me to accept considering my track record
>that served as a motivation, the contrat itself becomes hot, he's a real man, you are not
HOTTT and i can understand that path of events, might have to try that to get my mind to accept reality
>in addition to the fact that failed boys need a real man
yeah i think receiving dominance is linked to androphilia in a lot of ways, and obviously women arent into this. also the way you put things really gets me going desu
>signal it and trigger that impulse
thats a good mindset, this all makes sense tyvm!! seems like we are at the bump limit but i will be back for the next thread i'm sure, thank you again!!

>>43100321
>the process does seem fun
Learning to relate TO men from a submissive position is genuinely fun.