im in a long term relationship with a trans girl that i fully plan on marrying. my parents are extremely progressive and accepting and i love them with all my heart, they already know my girlfriend and they really like her, but my extended family are all the biggest rural hillbillies i have ever known. they made a fuss and continue to make a fuss about me being a lesbian ever since i came out when i was like 12, when i cut my hair shorter and started being more androgynous they would not stop bothering me about it. i try my best to avoid them at all costs but i know i cant do that forever, and eventually they will have to meet my gf even if its only at our marriage day, i know that they will most likely be weird about it i and i dont want to subject my gf to that, so i dont want to be caught off guard about this when the time comes. she absolutely passes to me, but she keeps getting misgendered by other people and i worry that the same will happen if she meets my extended family, i dont want to make it an uncomfortable experience for her to meet my extended family though. at the same time i have no idea how to explain to a bunch of hillbillies what a trans person even is (yes they are that stupid) let alone explain to them the basic manners of how to talk to a trans person, theyre not necessarily aggressively bigoted but theyve been telling me ever since i came out that its all a phase and that i just havent found the right man yet, if i cant get them to respect me how can i get them to respect my gf??help me does anyone have any experience with this
>>43142817break up with her cause youre a dirty chaser
>>43142817Sooo.... You're saying you're in a heterosexual relationship and you need help breaking the news to your conservative family. Please off yourself.
>>43143200my girlfriend is a woman, i am in a lesbian relationship
>>43143206oh nvm. that's hot and rednecks love that sort of thing. don't off yourself besides with orgasms.
>>43142817Be honest to your gf about your circumstance and, as an adult, most likely just decide not to invite your extended family.
>>43143218she knows about the circumstance and she just kinda brushed me off, i guess im just thinking too far ahead haha, but even if i dont invite them its just something that i cant really escape, i plan on living out my days with her so at some point they will meet her and i would rather that be in a controlled environment so they learn how to act normal rather than just a random encounter where they make my gf uncomfortable
>lesbian
>>43142817does she have to meet them? i personally would not invite people who dont accept my marriage to ruin my wedding
>>43142817I simply do not care what they think, my gf is my gf and if they want to see me then they have to accept that. However my family are poor and retarded. Both my brothers got tied down by fat chicks who lied about birth control that my mother hates. So that made it very easy.
a bit of it stands on how well she passesthey'll keep a chip on their shoulder if she's clocky, and spend the rest of their lives saying "I told you so" in the most backhanded and smug way imaginable. These dont sound like people you cherish much op, so I wouldn't think too hard on how to ingratiate them to another potential victim of their shit eating behavior, guessing that you're not planning on keeping them around or spending most of the year with them. in the case of holidays it's kind of the typical and frustrating calculus on how much it matters to you, if nobody in the family stands up to them when they snipe at you then holidays must suck. not much worth letting them dictate how your life goes, it's up to them to behave like human beings and show you and your decisions respect, if they can't do that lots of people would distance themselves as much as possible without being cruel or petty
OP you're very nice and the consideration you have for your gf's feelings is very heartwarming.
