I'm certain that I'm faketrans and probably have never experienced any true dysphoria, but at this point I don't care anymore Trying my utmost best to strive towards becoming as much of a woman as is possible for me feels like the only dream I am able to pursue. At this point I've given up on trying to figure out the "why?" and only focus on what I need to do to fulfill the "what?" pragmaticallyAlthough, that doesn't get rid of the confusion that stems from not knowing why I'm doing this
>>43143371you're reacting to trauma
>>43143379What? In what way?
/tttt/ trannytherapytherapytherapists
>>43143420Yeah, I'm using the board to vent, just as many others do
>>43143371I realized I just liked living as a woman enough that I quit caring if I was fake. Let go of pretending to have to prove myself
>>43143371i feel similarly. I don't trust my faketrans moidbrain to not retroactively gaslight itself into thinking that being an awkward, self-hating little fag since i can remember makes me trans, or that all the AvPD doomerisms were actually signs of some deep-rooted dysphoria, but i'm too far in to quit.
>>43143371Just because you've never experienced dysphoria doesn't make you faketrans, particularly if you're autistic. If you've started young enough there's a pretty good chance that you managed to avoid experiencing the downward spiral that is dysphoria. This is particularly true for autists because autists don't develop their innate sense of gender until late teens or early 20s, and the context of today if you're neurodivergent and you've been surrouded by gender ideology and you've woken up with the idea of "I'd just rather be a girl" at the age of 17 and just set about transitioning, then there's no reason you would have experienced gender dysphoria since you never actually repressed. A better way to think about it is how would you feel at this point if you were forced to detransition? If you can't imagine how you'd cope with that then what you're actually afraid of is dysphoria. The bigger issues come from psudo-dysphoria experienced by cis females who think they can escape certain aspects of their feminity by transition, and gender ideologues who refuse to even recognize that even is a neurological aspect to gender.
>>43143371are you happier with your appearance generally? objectively, even if you don't always see it?
>>43143549>are you happier with your appearance generally?Not really actually. Not because it isn't getting better, but because I'm now aware how horrible it is. I never liked my appearance, but I just put up with it and always took the path of least resistance, which meant simply looking like a well guy with good hygiene. Now that I actively engage with my appearance, it just hurts more whenever I'm made aware of how moided I am
>>43143809how long on hormones? do you get misgendered? I was miserable because of pronounced dysphoria during my early years of transition
>>43143881>how long on hormones?Not even 6 months>do you get misgendered?No, although I malefailed a couple of times. It was both funny and awkward when an old man ran to warn me that I was going in the male restroom >I was miserable because of pronounced dysphoria during my early years of transitionCan't really tell whether that's the case for me, as I'm either just mildly dysphoric, or absolutely drowning in it having never known what's it's like to be free of it