> be me, tranny> 16> come out to parents> don't react well> ask mom to pick a name> she refuses> they get angry when i start hrt at 18> stop talking to each other> ffw 8 years> reconnect> mom says sorry and she loves me> tells me what she would have named me> cry, hug, etc> wish I was that woman instead of what I named myself> years later> still cry about the name sometimesIts just a name but I can't get over it. I think about changing my name but I have my career and everything attached to it. Its fucking stupid but I just want to vent to anonymous imageboard I guess.
Option 1: Add the name your mother wanted. (medium difficulty, low disruption in your career)Option 2: Just start using that name as a nickname socially (low difficulty, zero disruption in your career)
>>43170487What's the name, nona?
>>43170537I am not thinking about the legal part I know its not hard to just add a middle name.Its more like I've been my name for over a decade now. And my transition is basically done, in most of my life I'm either stealth or just not openly trans. I don't know how to explain to people why I'm changing my name when its not accompanied by transition anymore.>>43170548Grace
>>43170699It's a good name. Could maybe make it a middle name. Less of a hassle for work but something you can go by. I still wonder if I should incorporate the name my mom wanted to give me if I was born a girl, but I don't even feel worthy of most names let alone that one.
She could have given you the name when you asked, life doesn't wait for anyone, and even if she regrets it, it's still on her for not being there for you when you came to her for acceptance and support. Taking it on as a middle name is perfectly fine too, but don't do something out of a false sense of obligation towards someone.
>>43170715I didn't feel worthy of a name either. I picked my name because I imagined a woman who had that name, and I wanted to be her.>>43170753Its not obligation. She said she was sorry for not giving me that name when I needed it and never once asked me to use it. Its wishful thinking for me, I think. Like my name now is that name of someone who had to deal with all of this alone, and her name is the name of someone whose mom helped her when she needed it. I just wish using that name could take away some of the pain of being let down.
