>>43336709
>because I have ruined my reputation with the local LGBT community
what did you do?

>>43336734
Back when I was repping even harder I was getting pretty transphobic/homophobic and told some prominent members of our community that I didn't believe in the trans ideology and that I shouldn't be in this community anymore. Also I was a pretty edgy guy, like regressing into who I was in high school and I don't think people appreciated being around me because of that.

>>43336709
>>43336771
Consider moving someplace else

>>43336771
>>43336891
Oh or you could also try going back there and make amends, if you can bear it

just take you pills and stop worrying about it

>>43336891
I can't move anywhere else. I haven't traveled enough and frequently enough to feel out anywhere else and I need to move out within the next couple months. I also want to get started transitioning within the next month, I already wasted so much time not being on hrt.

>>43336945
Then troon and just don't go there. Or make amends. Those are your options.

yeah you gotta be lame and say sorry to them… that’s your only choice
don’t be a retard and move states when there is a free option that works just fine

factoid on what the others are saying. Fuck moving, own up to being a mental case and try to make up. Though you can't hold it against them if they aren't accepting right away

>>43336978
I don't think saying sorry is lame, I think making amends for being a piece of shit is a good thing. I just don't know if they'll accept and even if they do I'll still be on edge like crazy. Especially when our one hub for the LGBT community is a bar and while my drinking problem isn't bad enough that I can't be at a bar while sober, I will never be able to soothe my social nerves with alcohol ever again given how destructive it's been in my life.

no its funny when trannies are transphobic

>>43336771
based af and you can still be like that on hrt if you want to

>>43337022
I literally only believed this because I wanted to keep some friends I had at the time and also my mom called herself a TERF so I sold out my beliefs for social approval. Funnily enough the friends I was trying try keep left me a couple weeks after that incident anyways so I sold out my beliefs and hurt people for nothing and got hit with karma hard.

>>43336771
if you genuinely regret what they said then it should be fine to go back as long as you're apologetic and understanding if they end up not want you there. if they dont kick you out it would prob be good to go up to the prominent members you were phobic too and apologize directly. I was super transphobic pretrans and was probably like that as a cope, im sure a lot of other tgirls are the same way. just dont expect everyone there to forgive you.

>>43337162
On second thought I don't think I should go back regardless. If I encounter someone from there I'll absolutely apologize but I see no reason to go there. I'm thinking back to before the incident and realizing I kinda hated being there. Everyone there was a normie and hyper vigilant about being woke. Like a decent amount of people I met there were the same kinds of people I'd see on Twitter and Reddit I'd use to hate. Meanwhile at that barcade out of state, there's a lot of trans women who obviously hold progressive views but you can have an actual, enjoyable conversation with them about cool video games and stuff. I just worry now because there's a 50/50 I move up there and I'm banned for what I did last time, or at least socially ostracized so I'd just be stuck in some shitty depressing expensive state with no good social outlet. Again, which is why I'm considering roping. I literally don't see any way in which I win at life anymore, ive so thoroughly destroyed everything.

>>43337551
i dont see the issue then just stop repping. if you're not gonna interact with the community at all then it doesnt matter what you do. are you in a red state?

>>43337593
I already spent two decades being a social recluse, I would rather die than go back to that. If I can't socialize then life isn't worth living. Also I live in a blue state but all they guys my age are transphobic and I suspect many of the women are TERFs. I know this is rich coming from me and I really shouldn't complain about that kind of thing and should embrace being hated to make things even but still. Basically I've fucked up my life so spectacularly it's much better to just throw it out than live a cucked existence where I'm in my room all day or want to kill myself every day regardless because testosterone is destroying my body.

>>43337639
>I dont want to be a social recluse.
>i dont want to interact with cis ppl
>I dont want to interact with the queer community.
you might be way too picky about who you interact with. like i get it, im also a friendless recluse due to social anxiety and a wfh job but i still transitioned anyways and im a million times happier because of it. im still sad im lonely but thats better than being lonely and a man. you can always just be friends with people on the internet or go to social events for a hobby you have. or try a new hobby. idk if it's nerdy enough chances are they wont be transphobic.

>>43337785
>internet friends
I would rather kill myself by putting a newspaper in my gas tank and light it on fire and die in a fiery explosion in my car than ever go back to that. My life is literally worthless without IN PERSON social interaction. And I do want to interact with cis people and I very well can if I just rep. Or again, just kill myself. And I want to interact with trans people as well, I've interacted with some very cool trans women here. But I also fucked up spectacularly with them because I ghosted all the ones I met for the same shitty reasons so I don't have many trans women left to meet since our town isn't that big. Thinking about it now, my dating pool is probably completely fucked here if no woman would want me and I really hate men romantically. I really don't see the point in continuing. Being dead is better than being lonely.

You could move to Buffalo

>>43337877
then just move somewhere else then that has more ppl. every trans person ive med has told me they want to move to seattle, just go there. it sounds like a trans mecca. idk its kinda hard to offer you advice when you're constantly threatening suicide.

>>43337949
>Seattle
Your solution is to have me move to one of the most expensive, dogshit cities in the country where I'll be surrounded by those twitter types no matter what. Got it. And yeah I'm sorry I'm being difficult but that's literally just how I feel. That's all I've ever wanted since I was 8. I'm trying to see if there's any hope whatsoever. But I'll stop bringing it up.

>>43338007
then move to a less expensive city, minneapolis is a good option. idk what your criteria is nona. im just trying to help there's no reason to be hostile.

just take hrt and see if you like it or not. why would you kys before even trying it.

>>43338007
You're literally just looking for an excuse not to troon. I get it, I do the same thing. You should really troon if you can tho

>>43338052
Because I'd rather die cis than die trans and have my death made political by my family. The second I hear them talking about some shit like "she suffered so much struggling with her identity" at my eulogy I'm rising from the ground straight from hell and setting that room or graveyard or w/e ablaze with my special hell powers.

Anyways my criteria doesn't even matter because like I said, I don't have enough time to feel out other places and I need to be out of the house within two months. It'll be a long while before I can ever travel again and feel anywhere else out. But I guess my criteria is I don't want to be in a soulless big city with a bunch of tweakers.
>>43338093
Should I? What if the real solution is being happy with what I have right now? People go to therapy so they don't have BPD and shit anymore surely I can correct this too. Maybe buy myself a shock collar and use it whenever I get trans thoughts.

>>43338170
okay retard have fun
make a thread when your life has fallen apart

>>43336771
>shouldn't be in this community anymore
Wait, why were you there to begin with? What was your stated reason?

>>43338170
you'd be dead why do you give a shit. you wont even be here anymore.

also you can just stop taking HRT if you end up not liking it.everything is reversible except the tits.

yes you should go to therapy

>>43338214
ya i genuinely feel like this person does not want help they just want attention cause they're sad and lonely. they don't actually want to do anything that will fix their situation cause they're lazy

>>43338170
It is not possible to healthily repress. I wish somebody told me this years ago.

>>43338232
Because I was bi and wanted an outlet to crossdress. Once I realized I had the friends I did and make the jokes I did with them and was never going to be with a man ever again I realized I was just using a space I didn't belong in to crossdress in and that felt really gross. Also again not a fan of like half the patrons.
>>43338282
What if it's not repressing and it's just going a different way? My main motivator to get on hrt is fear of twink death and my main motivator to socially transitioning is it's gonna feel a little ridiculous being effeminate and on hrt and a guy and also it feels nice to be called a woman. You're telling me I can't just rep? I don't think so.

>>43338170
every city has tweakers and unless you find somewhere to fit in most will start feeling a bit soulless

>>43337877
Lowkey get over hating internet friends, yeah don't rely on only having them but they can give you a window into places outside of what you can see, if you had some they could probably tell you about these fuck ass cities you could be eyeing up to move to instead of you having to cope them out

>>43338282
also this is real, shit only gets worse too

>>43338251
That's a fair assessment to make. I'm just trying to challenge every possible thing because it's near impossible to enjoy life right now and I have yet to find any reason why it's even worth living. I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking this and disengaging completely.
>>43338366
Last time I got close with Internet people I ended up with a boyfriend I really hated and five years wasted on computer people that could've been spent interacting with people in real life. I really really never want to go back and basing where you're going to move off word of mouth by some Stockholm Syndrome victim who doesn't realize they're in a shithole isn't a good idea.

>>43338395
I more meant online mates you share some hobbies with to get a general lay of the land, maybe related to said hobbies. Though if you have a kind of shit history then I can't convince you otherwise.
works for me and others I know, though is reliant on making multiple friends who aren't completely unstable or trying to get something out of you

>>43336709
fag-mormons