>>43472813
Killing yourself when someone cares about you is the most selfish thing you can do. Get help, focus your energy on improvement, get a hobby, something

it would be really funny if you lived to like 40 and never had any kids or anything and had a bunch of childless yuppie friends and invited them over for snobby yuppie dinner and wine and pulled a gun out in the middle of the dinner party like one of those huge caliber novelty handguns that fat americans shoot watermelons with on youtube and just wordlessly blasted your fucking head of in front off everyone im not depressed or suicidal but i really want to do this hopefully hell is real so i get to view the aftermath when im a ghost it would be totally worth it everyone in hell would probs find it really funny aswell so i would get an easy job or something

If someone cares about you so much that you’re thinking about the future wherein you commit suicide (don’t), and that someone is absolutely tortured by your death, you shouldn’t kill your self.

Get therapy and just find help for yourself. You don’t deserve to deal with the genuine torture that depression is, nobody does.

>>43473025
She lost someone else to suicide recently, I just keep thinking that if I went through with this I would be a horrible person especially after she confided in me with this

If you care about her enough to keep living a life you don't want for her sake, then you care enough to do the necessary work to get yourself mentally well for both your sakes.

Overcoming depression sucks. It takes at least a year and the first month feels like you're just torturing yourself without any hope of getting better, but it's worth it. Especially when you have someone around who's worth living for.

And me, I didn't even have anyone worth living for, and still managed to do the work. And ironically, within weeks of starting the work, I met someone worth living for, who I am still with now.

Start making changes. Make a list of reasons you don't want to live, and every day, make a move towards eliminating those reasons.

Fat? Start dieting. Hate black people? Move somewhere without black people. Hate your job? Quit.

Just keep knocking items off your "reasons to die" list until it becomes shorter than your "reasons to live" list. It takes time and work, but every reason you eliminate, the easier that work becomes and the faster you make progress.