>always felt too feminine for a boy>often told I am too feminine for a boy>transition>dress and look feminine>have boyfriend>have sex with boyfriend >still feel too masculine>still feel like my thin body isn’t feminine>post on this shitty website again>will probably be called ugly and masculine again>still here because nothing helps with that feeling of being too masculine
I hate anyone named Julie because of you and I thought you should know that.
>>43525820i’m not here to call you ugly. i’m here to tell you to stop wearing shoes in the house. i don’t know why americans have such unbecoming habits.
>>43525820hey nonny so ur actually insaneyou look like a woman, don't pay attention to any negative opinion on this site it's either chuds who don't have the spare neurons to rub together a thought, or jealous hons that want to knock you down a peg for being prettier than themgo fuck your bf and live your life, you made it
>i need to get fucked by a man to be a real womanTotally not sissy shit you're totally not a fetishist
>>43525837>so ur actually insaneyeah, I can feel that>go fuck your bf and live your lifeI try to and I still feel like I am not feminine enough
PostHole
>>43525846>gave herself the most common male name in the Arabic and muslim worldAnd I never said any such thing. But it’s curious that your mind jumps to it. The only thing I said is that even after having sex with my bf I still feel too masculine, which sucks, but I guess you have no empathy
>>43525848>I try to and I still feel like I am not feminine enoughi get that girl and same but the thing is no matter how much confirmation i get that i pass and am pretty it never moves the needle. i've had to sit with it and figure out why and the conclusion i came to is that you can't ever get that validation from others. i know it's maddening sometimes when you see yourself as masculine and clocky but literally everyone you meet tells you how pretty and passy you are, it feels like hugboxxing. but honestly if you don't believe them now you literally never will. posting in places like this in the hope that your deepest fears get confirmed is just self harm. you need to work on accepting yourself
>>43525872It really isn’t the case that I am hoping that people will call me masculine. Lol, I am not THAT miserable. It’s more of a helpless scream into the void because I have no other place to voice my thoughts and have them be heard and maybe replied to. I think my issue is that I can't give myself that validation. Maybe it’s dysphoria, maybe social media screwed with my brain but I just don’t feel that I look feminine enough, especially naked. I actually think I look nice when I wear my outfits and put makeup on, but I still can’t shake off that feeling that I am too masculine and not feminine enough and it sucks.
>>43525836I don't wear shoes in the house. I put them on to show off the outfit, obviously
>>43525894>I am not THAT miserableoww okay yeah lmao right who would be THAT miserable right...>I think my issue is that I can't give myself that validationyeah of course it's a muscle you have to work on, start by actually believing the people around you who are telling you how you look. the next step is to stop focusing on it so much and then validation will come in time. focusing on it like this only causes it to spiral and get worse. yes it's dysphoria which will always be with you to some degree but if you live your life as a woman and cultivate confidence and stop posting in this crab bucket of jealous hons
>>43525938>just stop focusing on it and it will fix itselfAnon you know this is too good to be true. And believing others is hard when you really do see different things in the mirror. I took a picture earlier because I wanted to see what my bf sees when I am on the bed naked and I feel terrible when I look at it. I'm aware you don’t want me to focus on that and that I spiral quickly, but I'm not the type to just avoid the problem
>>43525966okay i get that but you're kinda misunderstanding what i'm saying. you're developing habitual patterns of body-checking and hyper focusing on the parts of yourself that you hate and it's making your dysphoria worse. i'm not saying just ignore it, i'm saying when the urge to do things like photograph yourself laying down comes up you should not do that and instead talk to your bf about it and believe what he has to say about how he sees you. i get all this btw i'm awful with this shit but you have to give yourself a reprieve or you'll go insane. i got to the point where my friends would get mad at me because i look the way that i do and i worked myself into such a paranoid spiral about my appearance that i refused to go outside. the thing is dysphoria literally warps your internal perception of yourself, the same way anorexics think they're fat when they're one missed meal away from the OR. i'm not saying ignore it, i'm saying find other coping mechanisms and try not to strengthen that mental pathway that tells you you're a clocky masculine brickhon
>>43525996The problem with asking my boyfriend is that he loves me and will unconditionally always tell me that I look nice. I could be having the flu, haven’t showered for a week, messy bedhead, wearing a hoodie and sweats or nothing at all and he would tell me that he loves me and likes my body. I literally even ask him if there is anything I can change to at least appeal more to him, because I am unhappy with myself anyway and it took like 50 times to get him to be honest and tell me that after losing 15lbs he would like me to put on a little weight again.And without body-checking, how am I going to assess the situation? I need to check how I look and what I need to change. It's not like my body is just magically a woman's now if I stop looking in the mirror…
>>43526024>I need to check how I look and what I need to change.that's not what body checking is, it's hyperfocusing and doing things like taking photos of yourself from every possible angle>it took like 50 times to get him to be honest and tell me that after losing 15lbs he would like me to put on a little weight againboyfriend wants his gf to have a bit more to grab, tale as old as time, that doesn't mean you're masculine girl c'monwhat do your friends and family say? do you get attention from men in public? how do service staff treat you? you have to take a broad consensus because your perspective is warped and you'll always find something to focus on
>>43525869You made a thread yesterday that said you were a sissy bitch to your boyfriend and obeyed him to the letterDidn't know Allison was the most popular male name in the Arabic world thought that's rad
>>43526083bro has never heard of Allison Khamenei
>>43526075>What do your friends and family say? Don't have any irl friends left other than one trans woman, who says I look nice and came a long way.Family does not comment on my looks most of the time. My mom had not seen me for a while and said that my face looked skinny and that she liked my new bangs and couldn’t stop staring. My sister is a total narc who literally cries about how she has it so much worse if I even dare bring up my looks ever.>Do you get attention from men in public?No. Though I don’t go out as much lately and when I do it’s with my bf most of the time. Sometimes I visit my bf at work and his coworkers smile, almost chuckle and idk if it's because I am overdressed or I get clocked. >How do service staff treat you?Normal I guess. Can't say I notice anything. >boyfriend wants his gf to have a bit more to grab, tale as old as time, that doesn't mean you're masculine girlNo it's more like I feel masculine because I am skinny without any real curves. But at the same time I am scared of gaining weight and it just going to my tummy and making my pants and skirts fit worse and making me look and feel bloated. Small breasts run in the family and I wasn’t blessed with the wide hips that my mother and sister have. I could cry again
>>43526090
>>43526083I don‘t obey him lol. If anything I am the one wearing the pants in the relationship. I just like looking nice for him and appealing to him, but you can only warp that into a sissy fetish somehow with your warped mindGod forbid a girl dyes her hair black because her boyfriend likes that
>>43526113Yeah that is extremely fucked and that's literally what we women have fought for and to see moids larp as 50s submissive housewives disgusts meWhat next boob job because your boyfriend wants a big tits sex doll? Fuck off
>>43525820Attention whoring are we? In that regard you ARE a woman, even if you will never be one truly.
>>43526113girl ignore her she's being retarded
>>43526135at least I am not as miserable as you, no matter how dysphoric and hurt I am. Must suck to be you
>>43526157I am not miserable at all? I'm just having fun laughing at sissy fetishists but ok Julie :3>>43526137Nah I'm right but there are like no real women here esp. lately just sissy fetishists
>>43526171lmao that includes you hon
>>43526179>no uGood argument sissoid
>>43526135>we womennigga, please
>>43526201yah yah yah get in the chamber troon
>>43525831lel'd
>julie was being a bit annoying due to clown makeup>see ali sperg it up all up in this bok julie you're pretty chill in comparison now>>43525820>>still feel like my thin body isn’t femininewhat happens when you gain weight healthily (slow enough, eat healthy, good levels, enough sleep, enough physical activity, up to max healthy bmi range or idk) - hips boobs butt thighs, or too much belly?
>>43526203>racist>>43526212>naziAmazing friends Julie ur clearly doing well :3Fkn moids
>>43526259>Fkn moidsThis from a man who calls himself Allison onlineSad
>>43526264Ok Julie and friends.
>>43526252I can't say for sure until I try it and even then it’s just guessing percentages based on appearances and pinching skin. I'm approaching four years HRT and had gained around 20lbs since starting. Now I lost 15 and regained 3-4 so far. BMI from 24ish to 21ish. I struggled hard with going above 24. It definitely didn’t go to my boobs before, I still have A cups, tiny Bs at most and only lost 2cm off my bust measurement. I also lost 2cm off my waist and hips. Honestly I struggle the most with not getting any fat on my hips. There's barely any fat covering my pelvis and trochanter bones and I wish I could get curves there. I think it goes to my butt, thighs, tummy and arms more or at least in the past. I'm just so scared of the weight cycling being all for nothing and just looking and feeling the same when I regain weight. My mind is already wandering towards the cope "fat cells take 7-10 years to die, so it just takes longer smiley face". I just can’t take being frustrated and having my hopes crushed again. I'm stupid enough to be really stubborn and hold onto hope and try different things like weight cycling, but it’s so frustrating and soul-draining when it doesn’t help after all. I am scared of that happening again
>>43526270I don’t know these people and it’s funny you don’t realize how you are flailing around and now acting as if everyone is allied or friends with me
>>43526278It's your thread and your glazers. Idk don't y'all hang out on the same sissy discord servers idk senpai
>>43526281mad + jealous because I am prettier than your self-hating manmoder ass
>>43526288Hun i girlmoded since before you even thought about trooning that time when you jerked off in your mum's pantyhose
>>43526276>My mind is already wandering towards the cope "fat cells take 7-10 years to die, so it just takes longer smiley facemy personal headcanon is that it works* immediately, as it's the hormone levels that determine how android vs gynoid fat depos respond to caloric deficit and surplus, since depot size differences are affected both by cell count as well as cell size*on the other hand sleep, food quality, exercise (GH and other pathways) and stress (cortisol has a p big impact on visceral fat) are contributing factors24 is already pretty good, that's upper range for healthy, so you can cycle in the healthy-enough non-dysphoric-enough range as a lifestyle and keep occasional track of your measurements - butt and thighs have a great effect on curves, and in the future you can try pio or that less side effecty one if it's safe enough and you still want more and a faster boost
>>43526294It's really weird how you keep bringing up sissy shit. That stuff wouldn’t even be on my mind and I wouldn’t talk about it in every reply because it’s gross. Yet you do?
>>43526307I think you're broadly right ngl, you need to lose weight/gain weight while on E but it just takes time ofcThat said lots of trannies never get fat on hips for some reasonWhat's that less side effecty one you're talking about? I see everyone glazing pio but never heard about the other onr
>>43526311I found your thread yesterday weird and kinda icky and that's all. Thought it was a good reason to have fun bullying you a bit, have a nice back and forth yknooow
>>43526307I'll keep my hopes up then. The thought of having them crushed again and weight gain not resulting is a more feminine build is terrifying though. On a side note, I am really against pio, as the closer you look, the less it holds up to scrutiny. It only really helps with the ration of visceral fat to subcutaneous fat, not 'feminine' fat distribution. If you wanna exaggerate, then it helps with not having a beer gut, which I never had and probably never will
>>43526327>no beer gutAren't you German like shameful fr
>>43526321I don’t exactly consider this a fun back and forth, it just comes off as condescending and gross. You don’t seem cool or teasing, just hateful.And that’s coming from a stupid bottom like me who likes being teased and bullied sometimes.
>>43526340Yeah I'm old I struggle with the culture shift here being mean to each other used to be how you made friends here yknow Ig I could just say>Julie you should do what you want and your boyfriend should appreciate you no matter how you look>dying your hair black is cool but it should be for you honey!But idkkkk that feels weird. Prefer saying the same in a more assholey way.
>>43526316I forgot it tb h, hrtgen when it pops up might now>>43526352you can be an edgelord without sounding like you're seething, that's my usual approach at least>t. board fossil
>>43526362Yeah well I've always struggled with that despite legitimately having fun lel
>>43526352if I didn’t like it at all then I wouldn’t have done it. It's actually really really grown on me and like I said, I am really starting to feel like 'me' when I am all dolled up. And it’s sorta rebellious because I am blonde and everyone including my family dyes their hair a light blonde, which I hate, so I am cool with the opposite. I wouldn’t have posted about being happy with it, if I didn’t like it myself
>>43526395now I need to see non-blackhaired julie, blonde + that eye color might look awesomesadly im too lazy to tell some AI filter to turn you blonde
>>43526395Maybe don't say shit like "I'm my boyfriend's possession" if you really like it If this is to be a normal place we don't all have to engage in master/slave rp type shit - and kinks don't absolve you like you can have bigoted kinks yknow kinda tired of this "I'm a bottom" discord tranny stuff like be a normal woman omg
>>43526424I didn’t fucking say that!? I said that I dye my hair the color he likes and that I use the lipstick shade he likes and that I hope he likes my outfit. Those are all totally normal things. You really exaggerate my statements and interpret too much into them. My boyfriend is a total golden retriever sweetheart and I like making him happy, it’s not BDSM shit
>>43526444>>43526340>stupid bottom like meTotally not a sex thing nona right anyway yeah it's fucked you literally said you were >boyfriend's girlfriendAssigning yourself as property like brahAlso maybe stop being racist too because you'd dont like my name
>>43526450Girl you talked about a back and forth and being mean or teasing or catty or whatever it is for you and call me a potato head or sissy etc., I'm going to take a rip at you too. You can’t then be butthurt. It's not like I want to be mean, but you keep starting shit
>>43526482>it's okay to call you a ni**er because you were mean to meOkay kys lol I'm done have fun indulging your sissy fetishes literal cliché nazi
>>43526489I just point out that your name that you use on here is a common male name and you equate that to calling you ni**er? wtf?
>>43526497And what was the implication Julie? Why would having an Arab name be bad, Julie? :)
>>43526531It's not bad that it’s an Arab name, it’s bad because it is a male name. Girl I think you are thinking some racist shit and projecting it onto me. Idc if Ali is an Arab or Asian or white name, my dig was that it’s a guy's nameAllison is fine btw just use that
>>43526544Gonna keep Ali, always get misguided racist insults which shows ppl what they're worthMaybe you didn't mean it negatively but experience doesn't help here