>be me>mtf (7 years hrt)>boymode in retail job before i went to college>come back from college, need some money, job market's tough, decide to apply for work back there>get my old job back>have been girlmoding consistently for the past 4 years>decide to go back as my male name to not weird out the people who already know me>talking with the new manager about starting (guy i just met)>you know, i'm from the city. up here I know we don't have an hr department or anything but if somebody gives you trouble you can talk to me. and if you have anything you want to tell me about yourself I'm open to hear itH*CK>come in on wednesday>okay, is it alright if I wear this hoodie in for my first day>no we'll find something for you to wear. we're out of hoodies but we'll find you a long sleeve shirt to wear or something (C cups)H**CKmy ass isn't fooling anyone I'm such a stupid hon
>>43619280are you a truhon or a honlarper?
>>43619290i'd say I'm a twinkhon.
please help what do i do what do i do i don't want to cut my hair it makes me feel pretty
>>43619352I’m sorry op, possibly weirding out people who used to know you is impossible so you have no choice but to detransition so you can work this retail job
>>43619309honestly just girlmodelike it's gonna be less weird
>>43619429don't say that word it's scary
>>43619454i guess maybe i owe it to my manager to say something about it and maybe hear how he responds to it. i guess this was just inevitable because of my chest probably anyways.
>>43619459is boymoding and using your deadname not just detransitioning tho?? dont be a dumb bitch just tell them if they're being nice to you that's a good sign. using pronouns is clearly better to them than retraining some other dumb bitch.idk said w love or some shit but seriously I do not even see what the problem is here
>>43619664I guess i should tell them I'm just worried they'l think less of me. I dunno. I use my male name sometimes and get gendered female so I guess I am just scared of imposing on them
>>43620461What do you look like? If you're getting gendered female you should probably just girlmode. t. hypocrite
>>43620461Omg fuck them if they dont like it they're literal pieces of shit whose opinion are therefore mootLive for urself idiot istg all u troons need confidence classes or some shit
>>43620481https://files.catbox.moe/tq79az.jpgHere's a reference of what im working with between like feminine presentation vs masculine presentation. I just want to be presentable in public. It's sort of awkward because i think I just look like a man with long hair.
>>43620679That's a woman
>>43620679lol you omgnona just girlmode obviously everybody can tell you're a fucking fish
>>43620679if you voice pass yeah youre never gonna get gendered as malejust come out already you look like a skinny pale woman
>>43620679Foid
>>43620745but i'm presenting as a boy for this job
>8yrs hrt boymoder>womanevery time istg
>>43620807a "boy"rightyeahI don't think that's gonna work out
there is nothing boyish in that image
>>43620679my sides
>>43620836what am i supposed to do? am i supposed to tell them that I identify as a woman now? do i just tell them i'm on hrt and not talk about my gender? i think it's not normal for boys to be on hrt so i probably have to explain myself.
what does h**ck mean
>>43620679is the masculine presentation in the room with us?
>>43620955Tell them that you were just embarrassed because it's your hometown you're obviously a womanyou're not even a facehon like me so you can't even pull that excuse
>>43620987it means heeck. because you're exasperated there's two e's>>43621014the hoodie one is the masculine one because i have my hair tied up and stuff and a hoodie>>43621017>Tell them that you were just embarrassed because it's your hometownokay, i suppose I will. I feel so nervous about this ugh. i could just be imagining that they think i look different and totally embarrass myself and if that happens i'll harakiri>you're obviously a womanwell i mean i guess im visibly trans now but i still have a lot of masculine features
>>43621077>masculine featuresWHERE
>>43621145>WHEREWell i have a strong jaw and a broad midface and masculine orbitals and a big skull
>>43621171Skull doesn't seem too big, orbitals are not that big of a deal, you have a sharp jaw but not a masc one, and you have sharp cheekbones but thin massetersYou are a foid
>>43620679Sometimes I forget every single one of you fuckers looks like this
>>43621309I don't. Have a brick-shaped head.
>>43621191i just can't agree with that, sorry. it's painfully obvious and i keep thinking it over and i just don't want to be humiliated
>>43623287everyone already either sees you as a woman or trans. if you were to be humiliated it would have already happened
>>43623335how are you supposed to come out to people?
>>43619280>(7 years hrt)>boymodeHonestly, how? People were clocking my boymode at like 9 months, and I'm a midshit.
>>43619352Yes you will cut your hair, cuz your desire to be male and stronger than your desire to be female
>>43623431>how are you supposed to come out to people?"Hi [manager name]. I actually do have something important to tell you. I'm trans and usually present femininely. Would it be a problem for me to dress like a woman at work? Also, my name is actually [girl name] now. Please treat me kindly and thank you for hearing me out."
>>43619280Just exist in hon territory and >learn makeup>try on clothes that flatter you>lose weight if that's an issue>work outA little bit of muscle and a lot of posture goes a long long way you fucking lanky hunchbacks. Do some yoga. Just do normal things normal women do to seem more appealing that's like their thing they do
>>43623511the problem is my entire extended family shops at that place and if i present famininely there they'll find out too.
>>43623565Does your immediate family know at least?When my extended family first saw me in boymode they confused me for my sister. Maybe they won't recognize you?
>>43623603yeah my immediate family knows. i've basically been keeping myself seperate from my hometown and family while transitioning and trying to move away for a clean break and this is the last 3 months before i can just give up this stuff and fulltime forever. i just have a hard time with talking about stuff so unless I introduce myself as a woman I feel too ashamed to assert myself. my family would probably think less of me if they knew which is why i just want to get space before they are grossed out by me.one of my neighbors didn't recognize me when i came back and thought i was a girl but i think that was just a fluke because my coworkers know me a lot better and remember my name and one of them groped me before.
>>43619280There's a woman at work who always uses he before correcting to she when talking about me. I never said anything about my pronouns and everyone else uses he for me so idk if she likes sounding demented or if she wants to make me feel uncomfortable in front of others. I always ignore it and focus on my work.
>>43623684why does she correct from he to she? does she think that's what your preferred pronouns are?
>>43623648Your coworker groped you when you were still a boy?
>>43623786yeah. he did it twice but i didnt say anything about it because i didn't want to out myself but i guess he noticed my breast growth from hrt.
>>43623287Okay, how about you post like a full body pic in casual wear?
>>43623714I don't know. I've been working there for 4 years while manmoding on hrt and avoiding coming out to anyone. She literally repeats her sentences with the other pronoun whenever talking about my assignments. Happens every time even though all of our interactions are over Teams. Never met this woman in person. I think my coworkers were talking about my back and some rumor spread about me being trans and she took itreally seriously. I just want to do my job and get paid.
>>43620679You look like a weird alien ghoul Still, you pass in girlmode
>>43623799https://files.catbox.moe/vdbjc5.jpgThis is the sort of outfit im gonna wear to work with jeans and a long tshirt
>>43623648What do you have to lose from coming out at work, Nona?
>>43623884I would molest you non-stop if I were your manager MAMMA MIA
>>43620679This is because you feel like a man with long hair
>>43623849Maybe she's trying to be supportive>>43623871>You look like a weird alien ghoulYeah that's what makes it awkward>>43623894My grandfather showing up to my work to see me and being confronted with evidence that I'm trans mostly. I guess losing the respect of others as well.
>>43623914it's not like that's my identity inside but it feels like a mask i wear to hide my inner ugliness
>>43620679oh fo' fuck's sake. just girlmode OP.
>>43623927>My grandfather showing up to my work to see me and being confronted with evidence that I'm trans mostly.What would happen in this scenario? Him not talking to you anymore? If he'd hate you that much for being trans it might be better for him and for you to not force yourselves to interact.>I guess losing the respect of others as well.This might happen some but honestly I think if you're sincere about it and put effort into your appearance and voice most people will just treat you like any other person still.
>>43619280You were not on hormones when you were 12 years old which makes a big difference, as to why you still are ugly
>>43624067She's not ugly though she's honestly really pretty
>>43620679passoid
>>43624046>If he'd hate you that much for being trans it might be better for him and for you to not force yourselves to interact.i guess that's what i've been trying to do. just safely make distance so i can leave our relationship in a good place as he gets older.after this summer the job is over and i have more space which is why it feels like a shame to run out of time at the eleventh hour. idk im just trying to have my cake and eat it too. he just prays for my soul every week at mass and told me he thinks my brother's a lost cause because he's a communist but he's holding out for me like ;~; he only had daughters and always wanted a son and then sorta treated me like his son and if i troon out i feel like I'm betraying him so i've tried to keep those parts of my life seperated to protect him. i started keeping it under wraps because i began transitioning at the same time as my grandma got terminal cancer and i never got the narrative under control so i've had a schizophrenic private life for a really long time. it's been a lot of work and i just wanted it to last a little more but i also need this job.
>>43624094 and she wouldn't be able to me, but she's ugly in her own mind because she thinks she's ugly
>>43624211i want to be pretty but i don't want to be a delusional hugboxed hon
>>43624292You are pretty and not a hugboxed hon.
>>43624313do you think they'll hate me for being trans?
>>43624292You don't want to be the exact thing you need to be to be able to live this lifestyle. You're setting yourself up to lose.
>>43624351that's a blackpillif delusion is the only way to be happy, my life is too worthless to permit existing
>>43624332I can't tell you what they'll think but at this point I'm pretty sure they'd think it's not that weird given how you literally look like a woman.
>>43624654is it more okay to be trans if you look more feminine? how far am i supposed to take that? should I wear makeup too or do it after i explain myself? maybe i can do a little bit of concealer and lip oil that looks subtle
