>>44203219
I’m similar but not a transmaxxer just a mefy troon who wanted to troon since age 11. I don’t know. I’m getting SRS soon, FFS was great for me I hope this will be too

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That's part of what makes it hot, that last shred of male ego always reminding you that no matter how well you pass, you're ultimately a sexually conquered and neutered failed male that literally turned your penis in to a hole for dominant men to fuck and plant their seed in

>>44203219
he could make you orgasm in other ways. maybe him eating your srsussy to orgasm can be as relieving as penetration?

>>44203314
I need this so bad along with a guy who will bully me for it

you are enough as you are. you don't need to be afraid anymore

>>44203219
It only works if you were born a woman in a male body and transition. If you call yourself a transmaxxer, AGP, HSTS, troon, or boymoder, then it will never work. It will always depend on how much you enjoy larping. You will always know that and never forget it.

>>44203219
>>44203314
I hate you AGP retards so so goddamn much

>>44203417
I'm really.not AGP though..

>>44203219
hands on the keyboard please

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>>44203242
SRS helped me a ton and I bet it will you too. I wonder if the FFS will help me with the ego problem though.

>>44203314
Tbh I don't really need that angle to make things hot with my bf. He's hot and it's a big turn on for me to be dommed by him. Getting called a failed male during sex or whatever just feels kind of weird...

>>44203351
I could try this but honestly oral is a bit too much for me sensation-wise. Haven't been able to orgasm from it because I can barely relax during it.

>>44203402
Thank you for saying that, but I'm not afraid so much as just uncomfortable with this dual personality thing rather than just being fully a woman.

>>44203569
>so much as just uncomfortable with this dual personality thing rather than just being fully a woman.
what's your male personality like?

https://sissylover.com/blog/think-like-a-girl-10-girly-routines-to-feminize-your-mind/

this site is genuinely fetish content but the idea sticks in my head. if you strip all the sissy theming there might be something of note. or not

>>44203632
>what's your male personality like?
That's a good question; never really thought about it before desu. I guess he's insecure and anxious, doesn't want to be perceived as a fag, and is kind of annoyed with me for getting SRS and making it impossible to have a family the normal way.

Bump

>>44203778
>>44203314
actually rope, anything with the word si**y should be purged from the internet

t. former agp turned trutrans

>>44203417
This is AGAMP/MEF actually

>>44203219
nah, i resurrected it through black magic and drug abuse

you're right, you still are a man who has gay sex with his boyfriend. but that's completely fine. just accept that you will always be male and you'll reach a state of equilibrium.

>>44203778
Unironically most trannies would benefit from that kind of content to help undo the long term effects of repression (being closeted counts)

>>44206870
I’m not AGAMP (hate having penis) but am very MEF. Is MEF HSTS possible? I’ve never been into women at all so I doubt I’m AGP and am not turned on by having a female body, just having sex with guys who bully me for being a tranny. What is this?

>>44207293
it's spiritually kind of AGAMP regardless because "having been male" is kind of core to it, no?

>>44207293
Hsts are less likely to want bottom surgery than agp and more prone to detransition

>>44207314
Maybe? To be honest it’s kinda a recent thing like before I didn’t like guys doing that but now I’m really into it. Outside of bed though I just want to be female.

>>44207323
I know, I mainly want SRS for not having to tuck and not always having to do prep for sex so that’s kinda a hus reason for it.
I don’t actually find the idea of having one sexually appealing, it just would get rid of the two biggest annoyances in my life.

>>44207334
How's that a hus reason?

>>44207293
>I’ve never been into women at all so I doubt I’m AGP and am not turned on by having a female body, just having sex with guys who bully me for being a tranny.
Are you me?
>What is this?
A straight woman with masochistic tendencies? I don't think it needs to be more complicated than that.

>>44207324
I get it. I started developing some of those same feelings. I think part of it is just coping with internalized transphobia or w/e.

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ou don’t need to kill some “male ego.” you need to stop treating your past like evidence against your present. you were trained to associate femininity with humiliation, and now you’re reenacting that punishment on yourself.

that said, i know what you mean by the male ego too. life is how we frame it in the end. the conditioning around control, competition, shame, and fear of softness is real, and it’s worth dismantling. you kill the programming by refusing to keep rehearsing it. over time, the old pathways weaken when you stop feeding them.

>>44203219
For me it was kinda easy, I just let it die. Hanging on to that stuff is causing you distress, so let it go.

>>44208645
>you need to stop treating your past like evidence against your present.
I like this advice, thank you Nona.

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>>44203219
I honestly don't care. FOllowing our societies script doesn't make you a woman. Woman act in many different ways.

Personally, I'm happy to continue consuming my very autistic male interests (classic anime, tokusatsu, video games, etc.). I'm just happy my body now fits how I've always felt inside.

I don't need to put on a performance to be a woman.

>>44203219
>How did you do it?
MEF and a lot of socialization, basically.
I have 10 very close friends. 8 are cis women, one is a mefy wife and one is a cis man also married to a tranny.
Among acquaintances, nearly all are cis women. Slowly, but surely, over the years, I have come to accept it that I am just another woman now.
>How can a former male love a guy the way a woman can
MEF helped a lot with that. But also starting as a bifag helped. I will be having SRS soon.
But, really, it's the mind that matters the most.
I trannymaxxed because I was invisible. So obviously a failed male. Well, I failed so hard that I'm now a married woman. As such, accepting this status isn't that hard. I bring peace into his heart and uphold his masculinity. Just no longer being argumentative has helped a lot.
Ultimately as trannymaxxers we'll never be 'trutrans' but that's okay too. If I were 'trutrans' I would've never made it because I would've never acquired the discipline to actually pull this off.

>>44210260
Nta but that's true, most trutrans are dysfunctional due to dysphoria. Did your previous incel status give you MEF or did you consciously cause it?

>>44210260
>If I were 'trutrans' I would've never made it because I would've never acquired the discipline to actually pull this off.
pls elaborate on this.

>>44210345
>Did your previous incel status give you MEF
heh, I'd wish.
No, I consciously decided to trannymaxx because almost everything else on the list of things to try simply wasn't working. And since I was short (I'm even shorter than OP), bifag and low-level gymfag, I figured this is doable.
It was harder than expected but it did work. I did stay away from tranny spaces because the brainworms were ridiculous and the ideologies off-putting right off the bat for me. This worked well for my mental health but also meant I didn't learn about MEF until 2024 and consciously caused it soon after finding out how it can work.
From my pov it's basically 'mental transition'. Physically I made it but if I want to live the rest of my life as a woman (and I absolutely do) then I needed a way for this to no longer feel like a LARP but to actually enjoy it. In a way I lowkey gave myself agp (mef is ultimately a form of agp expression). I need to be the best woman I can be for my husband as well, not just for the goals I trannymaxxed for in the first place.
Imo this is useful for dysphoric trannies too, but they rarely want to listen.

>>44210392
Most dysphoric trannies (aka 'trutrans') are way more dysfunctional as people than my former self ever was. Some of it is due to GD itself (which is comorbid with autism, adhd and other ailments) and some of it is due to childhood/teenage trauma. I'm not even blaming them, just noticing.
Meanwhile, I have no autism or any serious or noticeable mental ailment. In fact I was rejected on GD assessment precisely because of this. Fair enough, but I still wanted to trannymaxx so I diy-ed and paid out of pocket.
But to do that required discipline. I got more work, saved up every penny, practiced socialization (having no or poor male socialization made it easier to learn social skills in a feminine manner right off the bat without further internal conflict), learned how to function and speak to soulpass (not just voice training, but how women use language and frame things), and then proceeded to practice that IRL and slowly become socially open.
All of the above is doable by anyone in theory. But in practice dysphoric trannies struggle with it a lot more than 'fake' trannies like me or the MEF fetishists or the generic 'hsts'.

>>44210432
>MEF is mental transition
What do you mean?

>>44210653
Transition is not just a physical process for people like me. I did all the physical part right, but without at least partially seeing myself as a woman, adapting to the new life and role was still a chore.
Sexuality is the fastest/most effective hack into neurplasticity. Once one accepts something sexually, it eventually seeps into all other aspects of life eventually.
If one is naturally AGP and androphilic then some form of MEF more or less naturally emerges. Since I was only partially androphilic (bifag starting point) but not AGP, transition was entirely a mechanical process. Worked great physically by sheer will, discipline and money. But it was still a role/a persona. I absolutely enjoyed people being more friendly to me, men being romantically interested in me and all the benefits I sought, but it was still a chore to 'girlmode' and act feminine, even though it had become more and more of an automatism/second nature by the time I discovered MEF.
MEF is (to me) the sexual expression that I'm not a real man. I am different from men and I feminized/am feminizing myself for my husband and being the best woman I can be has to first start with accepting that I am not a man sexually too.
May sound cringe to some but the more I rewired my sexuality to be more passive/receptive/whatever-you-wanna-call-it, the more confident I felt in my newfound femininity outside of sex too. Longterm use of hrt also is slowly coming to the point I actually need at least an orchi so I decided to go straight for SRS. That's something I wouldn't have considered in 2024 for instance. But since now I enjoy being submissive to my husband, I also want to get rid of anal prep. Also, logistically, it'd make me basically full stealth as I'd pass naked without make-up.

>>44204719
What the fuck anon. You realize you did all this because you couldn't come to terms with your sexual orientation, don't you?
Having a male personality isn't normal, but having one that is mad and doesn't want people to think he's gay is just writing on the wall.
How long until you detransition and campaign against real trans women having access to SRS?

>>44210697
Sounds great! How did you accept it sexually though?

>>44210894
Or the "male personality" is just his superego.

>>44210894
the stench of the insecurity on this post

>>44210953
Nothing to be insecure about. Having another voice at all should be a huge red flag for anyone.
>>44210935
Bullshit theorizing doesn't make it better.

>>44203219
Sissy hypnosis is good. I don't really care what is said about it because it reaches towards sexual ego which is a powerful thing. your unconscious self is always visible, it should be the main target.

uhm, besides that maybe you can take an objective view of your life as an experiment. Routinely get your hair styled without attachment to your ideas of what is right. I don't think this is risky, I think you will ultimately know what is right.

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>>44210975
i believe those voices are thoughts, anon

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>>44203396

>>44210697
How did you obtain a letter for srs? I live in a deep red state and have been diy for a decade. I'm afraid to put myself on a list now.

reading disturbed shit like this is making me glad I didn't give into AGP or MEF

>>44210913
Unironically practice, honest talks with my husband and a few behavioral changes (some of which you don't need anymore since you're postop).
>>44211003 is also lowkey correct about hypno. Audio stimulation conditioning does in fact work, just not in a few weeks, but more like a year.
As the name implies, masochistic emasculation fetish, it's a lot more about becoming less masculine, accepting that and regarding it as a good thing, than it is about feminization. I was already sexually attracted to my husband, of course, but more in a bifag way. I wasn't seeing myself as truly sexually submissive to him, now I do.
I wasn't much into porn anymore anyway but the little that I still did watch was largely unchanged since pretroon, just with me trying to self insert as the woman. Changed that entirely too. No porn with cis women until I get srs and no tranny porn where the tranny tops. Slowly I stopped jerking off too and somewhere around that time (early 2025) I started slowly accepting sexually that I'm not a man. Soon after I started feeling great, not just content, with being sexually submissive to him.
Switching to anal and vibrator masturbation also taught me how to make orgasming from penetration the norm rather than a nice to have. Makes it harder to think of myself as a real man when my best sexual experiences are when he dicks me down while groping my breasts.
Sounds cringe when writing it but I do find it hot when he calls me a failed faggot or shames me for having a dick. In 2023 I was 'whatever, one day, maybe' about SRS. Now I'm a few months from getting it and I can't wait.

>>44211131
I live in Europe (not terf island) and every country has different rules.
I didn't need a letter at all as long as I paid in cash. What I needed was a clean bill of health for the purposes of SRS (some of the assessments were done at the clinic, others I had to go through them independently at any clinic in the EU).
My EU country doesn't require SRS to change legal gender marker. Just any evidence you've been doing hormonal treatment and any evidence you've been living as your desired gender for two years (these two can run concurrently). In practice, doctors give you the paperwork pretty fast if you've been diy-ing. I had been living full time as a woman for more than a year and 3 yrs on diy when I got my paperwork.
>I'm afraid to put myself on a list now
Well, then the only option you have is to do it abroad and pay cash.

>>44203219
Accept that, whatever your origins or motivations, you are allowed to be happy. It's simple, but not easy.

>>44203219
>>44211427
>you are allowed to be happy
^^^^this, OP. Fucking this!
>I was just a boy once
I was a straight man living with my gf once. So what? Now I live with my bf and am a postop mef tranny. I'm still fascinated that I got to do all this, but I also take it as blessing.
>feel like even touching [makeup] makes me a "fag"
Oh no. And?
Very technically speaking I'm a cis man who's had ffs, rib remodeling and srs, uses she/her pronouns, been on hrt for 8 years and has been living with a man for the past 5 years. Let anyone call me a fag. I might even like it in the right context.
>SRS helped a lot
Oh i know that feeling. You could just continue to lean into that.
To put it crudely, you are now stuck with boobs and vagina. Might as well lean into it and enjoy it. Many wish for that and never get to experience it.
The doubts eventually do go away the more time passes and you enjoy your life. Time really does heal everything.
Still, it's not hard to accept reality if you have a constant and healthy sex life with your bf.
>The only other thing that's helped is stopping using my fingers or vibrators, and only allowing myself to orgasm from penetration alone...
>When I can manage to do that with my bf I can feel the shame and regrets ebb away slightly
Rub it when you're doing missionary. And do missionary a lot more often. Not only will the orgasms be more often and usually stronger, but if you're lucky you may hit multiple orgasms too. Also, nothing screams harder to your brain "hey buddy, you're really not a man" than seeing him balls deep and him not stopping even though you finished. Sex is over when the man cums. So that's him, not you.
If you're post op, you don't need more restrictions, but rather more experimentation. Masturbation as post op is way more fun so you shouldn't be restricting that (other than excessive use of vibrators because that desensitizes you). I still find time to ride a dildo a few times a month. And btw you should be doing that.

>>44211367
Being a European sounds heavenly. I'm not even on my husband's insurance atm and even if I was I live in a care desert in genocideland.
So jealous of yall who've gotten procedures done. I mean I don't need them to stealth or be happy but it would be affirming to finally have srs. I've transitioned like 2x longer than you too :(

>>44211822
>Being a European sounds heavenly
meh, not really. It depends on the country (just like in the US). There's very troon-friendly places (like Spain), very terfy (the UK or Italy), chuddy and violent (some parts of Poland, Ukraine, Belarus), chuddy but indifferent (the rest of eastern europe), in theory friendly but bureaucratic hellholes (germany, finland, sweden)... and lots of gradient between these.
The grass is not necessarily greener on this side of the Atlantic. My job pays almost 4 times more in the US and I'd also get to keep a lot more of that pay due to (far!!!) lower taxes and fiscal burden compared to Europe.
>I've transitioned like 2x longer than you too
You said you've been at it for a decade. I started in late 2017.

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>>44203219
oh a trannymaxx thread
i dont really have anything to add to the op, but i have a long term question
is srs actually fully and totally and entirely necessary if you want to trannymaxx
i dont see a use in having a penis if i will be living as a woman, albeit im still just waiting for my hrt to arrive so im really early

>>44211885
Technically I've been on hrt 16 yrs and started when I was a minor, I didnt really wanna reveal that.

I met my then boyfriend when I was 18 and dropped everything for him and have been his housewife ever since. I honestly feel trapped and unfulfilled. I haven't worked a day in my life. I'm totally dependent on him.

>>44211889
>i dont see a use in having a penis if i will be living as a woman
I haven't even had my T suppressed for long, maybe a month and a half (been on low dose sublingual 2 to 4mg a day since jan 2025, but switched to spiro and patches at the beginning of June) and my dick and balls remain tucked just from pulling up my panties. My balls got so small, they basically live in my inguinal canals. Dick is like 2 inches soft and almost never hard.

My plan is just to get an orchie. SRS is just too invasive a surgery for me.

>>44211889
>is srs actually fully and totally and entirely necessary if you want to trannymaxx
In absolute terms, no.
In relative terms, especially if you date men, then yes.
Long term use of HRT means that at some point you will need at least an orchi. That point can be 8 or 10 or even 12-13 years later. But it does eventually come.
Once you actually pass, having a penis becomes increasingly inconvenient. You can't wear certain clothes, becomes odd to go to the beach or swimming and traveling can be a problem too (and not just in the third world or w/e). My job involves a lot of international traveling. I literally wouldn't have gotten it if I hadn't been postop.
Besides all these, there's the physiological aspect. Anal prep sucks long term. Not an issue when you're young(er) but once you get older, it becomes a chore that ruins the fun. Three years into trooning I started the process to get SRS for this reason.
>i dont see a use in having a penis if i will be living as a woman
And then there's simply this.
I don't have to autistically think and consider every situation and be afraid i'd be outed or whatever. I like my amateur sports and my outdoor activities. I don't want to tell everyone that I wasn't born a woman. They wouldn't care that much (they're all mixed/coed activities anyway) but it'd introduce a further complication that I don't need.
t. rooned in 2014 for the fetish, srs in 2019

>>44203219
Idk about killing it but yin energy is all about accepting and taking things in. Just let yourself be embarrassed. Its not the end of the world. It wont kill you. You have nothing to prove. Stop letting your inner dialogue harrass you and control your life.

>>44211936
Is he opposed to you getting a job?
If not, then you could still unfuck your life without sacrificing your marriage.
I had no official job until 2018 (worked menial under the table stuff prior to that) because nobody would have a socially retarded dude. It literally is easier to get a job even if you don't pass but you're some sort of a cuter male.
Yeah, you gotta start very low. But everyone starts from somewhere. If you pass even partially you already have an excuse that you were housewifemoding.

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>>44211889
>is srs actually fully and totally and entirely necessary if you want to trannymaxx
No, not at all. But to be honest it was so worth it for me in hindsight that I can't recommend it enough. If you like men and/or don't really want to use your penis it's a huge benefit. If you're unsure about it though you should definitely wait at least several years before pursuing it. Now that I've had SRS I'm pretty much locked into being a tranny/trannymaxxer for life. It's a big commitment and one you should spend a lot of time thinking about before you make a decision.

>>44203219
This board needs to be renamed /gggg/ because most of y'all are some fake trans at this point

I love accelerated graphics ports

>>44212416
they're all fetishists or opportunists. it really is embarassing for the rest of us

>>44203219
How is SRS actually? I've heard all sorts of negative stuff like you need tons of revisions, it doesn't actually feel good, etc.

>>44212416
they are all normal trannies trying to be special and unique

>>44212472
The rest of you? All 3 trans women actually left?
That's why everyone moved to discord

we know how this one goes next you say normal means trans are all delusional gay men, fuck you dumb fuck

>>44212346
>Now that I've had SRS I'm pretty much locked into being a tranny/trannymaxxer for life
Unironically one of the unexpected benefits. It clarifies things in a way nothing else does.
Am I a 'tru' tranny? Idk. But I have breasts and an srussy and I lust for a man. It's a done deal and gotta make the best out of it.
>>44212472
>they're all fetishists or opportunists
What exactly is wrong with having fetishes? You do know that AGP is in itself a fetish, right?
As for opportunism, idk. Yeah, I took the opportunity to troon because I wanted to and could afford it. Why exactly should I apologize for that?
>it really is embarassing for the rest of us
Oh, please. It's not the MEFy girls that shove polycules and optics nukes in public. You wouldn't even see me at a Pride event.
And if you actually knew cis women and you'd soulpass, you'd also know that the vast majority of healthy sexually active cis women are in fact straight and their sexuality is not significantly different from agp-mef.
>>44212485
ig i am atp. But certainly wasn't at first. Thank fuck I trooned when the ideology of 'trutrans' hadn't caught up the way it did later on.
t. >>44212062

>>44212474
>you need tons of revisions
Four years in, no need for a revision. Unlikely I'll ever need one.
>it doesn't actually feel good
I can orgasm, it self lubricates and had no pain or stings once it actually healed (the recovery does suck though). No complaints, really. It does what I was expecting it to do.
I am very grateful for the IRL tranny who insisted that I'd actually talk to post op trannies and qualified surgeons, rather than disinfo anons or people with an agenda.

>>44212579
>I have breasts and an srussy and I lust for a man. It's a done deal and gotta make the best out of it.
Knowing I pretty much have to be with men from now on is pretty hot desu...

>>44212898
I mean I suppose I/we could in theory be with women in the future but c'mon, let's be realistic.

This be hot to pursue but im straight, like my manly personality and am early 30s.

>>44213143
>im straight, like my manly personality
me in 2019, lol
>and am early 30s
was exactly 30 in 2019.
the last manly thing I did was to say fuck it, I can do whatever the fuck I want. I probably will be married before I turn 40. Turns out you can just do things.

You fetish roleplayers are pretending to be post-ego now?

LMAO

>>44213283
>t. repper

>>44203219
>know I was born male and was *supposed* to have a wife and
. You obviously resent not being fully male

I have become entirely female in my dreams but i don't feel particularly different (gendered) in meatspace. Does this count?

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>>44212898
i think being with a woman wouldnt really be of any benefit, nor would it fulfill me mentally or physically or socially

I'm so glad this thread is still up, i love you all

>>44213309
>You obviously resent not being fully male
What do you mean?

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>>44203539
>hands on the keyboard please
What does that mean

>>44210260
>I have 10 very close friends. 8 are cis women,
How did you make friends with cis women, Nona?

>>44210894
>You realize you did all this because you couldn't come to terms with your sexual orientation, don't you?
I wasn't into men prior to transitioning (wasn't really into women either.) That's kind of the entire point, you know?
>How long until you detransition and campaign against real trans women having access to SRS?
How tf would I detrans when I have a vagina and C-cup breasts? Let alone the fact I never want to go back to being a man again.

>>44211624
>Rub it when you're doing missionary
>if you're lucky you may hit multiple orgasms too.
Unfortunately I have a lot of trouble climaxing unless one of my legs is "locked" straight. I'm making some progress fixing that though as it used to require both but now I can do it with only one with penetration.
Missionary is super hot though definitely my favorite position with him.
>Sex is over when the man cums. So that's him, not you.
I feel weird with how much hearing this turns me on
>I still find time to ride a dildo a few times a month. And btw you should be doing that.
Riding it is all well and good, but I can't climax using one unless I'm directly moving it with my hands :(

>>44212416
It doesn't really matter if I'm faketrans or not because I'm functionally just a normal woman now either way.

>>44212474
I had one revision (to give me a clitoral hood which basically no surgeon does on the first surgery. It feels amazing. Being penetrated feels really good. Even dilation feels kind of good now with the larger diameter ones.

>>44213283
>You fetish roleplayers
Don't really see how it's "roleplay" when I've been trooning for 7 years, and have lived together with my cishet bf for two years having nearly daily PiV sex with him...

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>>44215499
for some reason i kinda find it hot to think of myself as such a genetic failure of a man that my only option is being a woman married to a proper man
its still a long way ahead but the prospects of being essentially conquered, cant think of a better word, is tingling hot
but i still want the hypothetical him to actually truly love me and cherish me too, not only just a fetish play, because i want a proper new life like what you all told me you had in my own thread instead
my life so far was really invisible and lonely

>>44215499
Is there a point or need for revisions if you don’t care about complete anatomical accuracy and just want an approximation. Not like I’ve ever seen a vagina IRL, so it being a bit off wouldn’t bother me much as long as it doesn’t look disgusting.

>>44212062

Longterm use hrt you need an orchi? Why?

>>44215819
nta but while it's not absolutely necessary, in practice long term use of hrt means fighting against the T factory (your balls) which eventually puts a strain somewhere else on your body: either on the liver (if you use AAs) or on your hair (DHT still gets produced) or somewhere else on your body.
That's very likely what that anon is referring to.

>>44215901
nta, but wdym hair? am i gonna loose my hair if i keep my balls?

>>44215499
>have a lot of trouble climaxing unless one of my legs is "locked" straight
As you've noticed, training helps. It's a psychological, not physical limitation.
The reason I mentioned missionary is because that did wonders for me mentally too, not just sexually. He's not significantly bigger than me, but he can relatively easily overpower me so having enough trust in him to be naked underneath him and not just let him but actively crave him pounding me has definitely done something to my head too.
It became quite hard to still conceptualize myself as a man (let alone a straight one) after 50 times of that happening. Now it'd be even weirder given that while his cum is slowly leaking out all I can think of is either how to hug him better or reach out for his dick and gently ask for another round.
>feel weird with how much hearing this turns me on
Why feel weird tho? It's an objective truth that happens to be hot. No need to feel weird.
Idk about your guy but my bf doesn't stop when I orgasm. He may slow down to allow me to catch my breath, but he won't stop (I wouldn't want him to anyway) until he cums. Lowkey I'm happy when he cums even if I haven't.
>can't climax using one unless I'm directly moving it with my hands
Try mounting it on a wall (or some other vertical surface) and replicate the moves with your body. Trust me on that. This is also a psychological limitation that can be overcome.

>>44215972
>am i gonna loose my hair if i keep my balls?
No, lol.
More like the effects on hair growth will be less pronounced due to constant interference from higher-than-normal DHT.
All hormones (including DHT) are compounding. Finasteride lowers it by ~50% to around 40 ng/dL. Estradiol lowers it to around 30 ng/dL (sometimes 25, if you're lucky). That's why HRT femboys love to take hrt because it does wonders to hair.
Well, the standard cis female DHT levels are between 4 (!!) and 22 ng/dL. The difference isn't a big issue when you're 25. But it compounds into a noticeable difference when you're 40. This is the reason why 40 year old women have more and healthier hair on their heads than even the most conscious fin/duta looksmaxxing bros at the same age.
It's not a black and white thing. It's more like a continuum, so to speak.
By all means, don't get orchi. You don't absolutely NEED to. It's just that it's a good idea after a long enough period on hrt for the long term health of your body overall. But it's still ultimately a choice. Everything about this is an individual choice.

>>44216105
God what to I have to do to have this :.(

>>44203219
That sounds more like internalised transphobia or bioessentialism than "male ego". :( And it's not your fault you have these views! They were put in all of our heads, and we have to work through them and surpass them.
No, nona, you weren't "supposed" to have a wife and start a family, you were supposed to have been born a woman to begin with, it's who you are, otherwise you wouldn't have gone through all this trouble to be one. This "supposed" is actually just other people's expectations and impositions, which I would say is the opposite of an ego.
The imposter syndrome you describe once again just sounds like internalised transphobia, like feeling that you're not enough, which is the opposite of an ego, and your aversion to "touching the stuff" also sounds like fear you've gained of other people's reactions, which is normal, but you're a woman now. Set yourself free, nona. You don't have to hold yourself to standards of masculinity anymore, you're a woman, doing what women are expected to do. No serious person will judge you, and anyone who would is a transphobe not worth the time. Good luck, nona <3

>>44203314
Disgusting fetishist walks up to a real trans woman and basically tells her "you will never be a woman"... speak for yourself.

>>44207293
In so far as HSTS and AGP are real things to begin with, then yeah, Blanchard's HSTS is "a gay man" who wants to be a woman in order to date men, so... it lines up perfectly.

>>44208645
This is beautiful, nona <3

>>44210260
>Well, I failed so hard that I'm now a married woman.
The rest of your post was really sweet but saying shit like this just shows how misogynstic the "MEF" crap is. A woman is not lesser than a man. Being a woman is not a consolation prize for failing as a man. The reason YOU "failed" as a man to begin with is that you were never meant to be one, you were always meant to be a woman. Simply being a loser doesn't make a man a woman.

>>44212606
>I am very grateful for the IRL tranny who insisted that I'd actually talk to post op trannies and qualified surgeons, rather than disinfo anons or people with an agenda.
This is so real...
> self lubricates
What technique?

>>44215499
>How did you make friends with cis women, Nona?
Step 1: Stopped being afraid of them.
Step 2: Stopped being a social retard.
From there on, it was really is. Just constantly striking up a convo, inviting a few to a shopping session over the week-end (cringe and stereotypical, but you'd be shocked how well it works), which slowly moved to a girls' night out or to them introducing me to some other friends of theirs, and so on. It's a compounding effect.
Making the first two acquaintances is the hardest. From there on it gets easier. I was still very clocky when I got my first cisf friend (I still think she was lowk attracted to me, but that's a separate story).
Even if you don't get close friends anytime soon. Basic acquaintances still help a lot. Constantly socializing with cis women really is a must.
Cis women learned to socialize as women in childhood. We gotta catch up. And it is possible to catch up, regardless of what the terfs claim. There's really nothing magical. It's just people. But women do socialize differently not just in public, but in private too when no men are around.
>>44216247
>I don't understand metaphors
Okay. What can I say?
It means I failed upwards, you uptight tone-policing boor!
>The reason YOU "failed" as a man to begin with is that you were never meant to be one, you were always meant to be a woman
Well, I disagree. And the doctors disagreed to. The only reason they changed their mind is because I came back three years later in girlmode, mentioned DiY and presented my FFS appointment.
>Simply being a loser doesn't make a man a woman
Absolutely agree with you. Learned that the hard way, and glad I did.

>>44216321
>differently not just in public, but in private too when no men are around.
how differently? is it true like the blackpill?

>>44216321
>I don't understand metaphors
>you uptight tone-policing boor
Mean :(
> the doctors disagreed to. The only reason they changed their mind is because I came back three years later in girlmode, mentioned DiY and presented my FFS appointment.
Based... but if you weren't meant to be a woman all along, you would not have gone through all this trouble.

>>44216321
I feel like I’m worse off than most people because I have no IRL male socialisation either. Put me in a room with anyone and tell me to make small talk or friends I just can’t. I have never had friends past middle school, the closest I’ve had is boyfriends but that’s different and talking to random men like you would a partner is obviously stupid and bad. Outside of school I never hung out with any friends since before 10.

>>44216384
>have no IRL male socialisation either
Legitimately an asset. At least it was for me. I got to learn socialization almost from scratch as a tranny.
I'm sorry but there is no easy answer. It's simple, but not easy. You will have to bruteforce it.
>Put me in a room with anyone and tell me to make small talk or friends I just can’t
Oh yes you can! You will fuck it up the first time. And the second time. By the 5th time you'll fuck it up less. By the 20th time you will actually get a smile. By the 50th time you picked up a new acquaintance.
"I can't" is not real. Of course you can. Every single human with an IQ above 80 can do it.
It makes you uncomfortable? Well, tough luck. Compared to other aspects of trannymaxxing, this is easy.
If you could pick up boyfriends, you absolutely can pick up friends too. You just refused to try because it seemed hard and it's more comfy to just throw your hands up in the air and say "I can't". Well, you're wrong. You absolutely can. You already proved it because otherwise you'd have been single.
>>44216359
>but if you weren't meant to be a woman all along, you would not have gone through all this trouble
No, anon. I explained a bit in another thread here >>44168438
I've gone through all this trouble to no longer be invisible and lonely. It worked so I continued to take all of this seriously. It started as a larp project and only now, 8 years later, I'm settling into the fact that I am a woman now, even if I don't fully see myself as one. And given how well everything went, might as well take it seriously since I will be socially female for a long time since I intend to live a long life and I ain't going back no matter what.
I am what the namefag says: a trannymaxxer. I wasn't meant to be a woman. I just grew into one through various circumstances and several conscious choices. A few slightly different outcomes of certain events between ages 19 and 22 and now this convo wouldn't have happened.

>>44216517
Ok. I don’t want to try it at work bc when I mess up I’ll make my job really awkward. What are good places to try?

>>44216547
nta, but lowkey just a park

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>>44216517
how does socialising actually look like as a trannymaxxer anyway? besides the obvious talking part, i mean the interactions and such

>>44216351
>how differently? is it true like the blackpill?
Yes and no. There are many parts of the blackpill that are in fact correct (at least in part), but there's also a loooot of disinformation or exaggeration in the online black pill spaces. Idk what the latest brainworms are because I stopped paying attention to any algorithmic social media years ago.
For instance, it is true that women talk quite a bit about men when men aren't around. It is also true that women talk about men in a far more sexualized manner than men talk about women when women aren't around.
The black pill however exaggerates this to levels that make it hilarious to me now that I've taken a slight peak on the other side. For instance, take height. The only time height comes up in discussions is with the preference that he is taller than her. That's it. The whole "he needs to be at least 6ft" is terminally online brainworm.
And, let's face it, being taller than her is really not a high bar (pun intended). The vast majority of "shortcells" online are in fact tall enough and it's not their height preventing them from landing a date no matter how loud they scream otherwise.
There is also a form of codeswitching. This took a while to figure it out but it's also the way I know I soulpass now. The way women talk to you when they perceive you as just another woman versus how they talk when they perceive you as a tranny is different. It's nothing malicious (as the black pill claims), but it's a real phenomenon (no matter how much women deny it). It has a scientific explanation too, but I won't bore you with that.
Also, there is intrasexual competition and conflict too. It's just that conflict is played out entirely different than in mix-gender groups or among men. It's just as vicious, but just not as direct.
There's no way I can explain this to you mechanically. You have to live it and experiment through trial and error. Every group of women is different in dynamics too.

>>44216547
park, bars, clubs, concerts, random events, hobby groups... anywhere people gather. If they gathered there, odds are they're not shut-ins and are usually pleasant enough to make small talk about the event/thing you're all there for.
>>44216588
You can't be serious! Just talk to people JFC.
I'm in a train now heading home. In between replying to this thread I'm having a convo with two lovely older ladies about the economy and family life. One of them brought up an event that's happening in my city this week-end. I'm listening carefully as she's "selling" it to us and thinking whether I should drag my husband to it or not, haha.
People are not machines. There's no "manual" on this. There's no script. I had no idea I'd be talking about this event or about family life an hour ago as I was heading towards the train station.
Plan less and just live.

>>44210260
>I bring peace into his heart and uphold his masculinity. Just no longer being argumentative has helped a lot.
>Ultimately as trannymaxxers we'll never be 'trutrans' but that's okay too
istg you girls are better at being women (not abusebait doormats either, presumably) than most of the poor brainwashed cissies out there

>>44216607
>The way women talk to you when they perceive you as just another woman versus how they talk when they perceive you as a tranny is different. It's nothing malicious (as the black pill claims), but it's a real phenomenon (no matter how much women deny it). It has a scientific explanation too, but I won't bore you with that.
can you elaborate on that one?

>>44216607
>Also, there is intrasexual competition and conflict too. It's just that conflict is played out entirely different than in mix-gender groups or among men. It's just as vicious, but just not as direct.
as the relevant nerds call it, relational violence (as opposed to physical), though blackpillcells are often in one-track autist mode due to too much rumination and try to make you think all inter/intrasexual interactions are competitive and adversarial

>>44216645
idk if I should be happy about that or upset.
Sadly, I do know you are at least in part correct.
I also find it horrifying when I'm put in the position to give advice about couple life to a cis woman. Even more horrifying when she takes the advice, it does work out and she's then grateful.
I try my best (successfully so far) not to blurt out that getting functional straight couple advice from a troonmaxxer should not be happening. But it does. Not very often, but non-zero.
More broadly, the zoomies are just fucked up. Both the men and the women. They have crazy ideas about how life should work that legitimately terrify me.
The black pill paints a picture (albeit incomplete and rife with exaggerations) about young women's delusions. But men are not significantly better either. I should know, lol. I now understand why women date older guys. Heck, my husband is older than me.
I try not to think about it too much but it pains me how many otherwise good people are sucked into a vortex of algorithmic bullshit and end up believing crazy things that eventually fuck up their lives. And I say this as an incel who trooned, lol. Trannymaxxing sounds crazy to 45 year olds, but compared to the thinking of the average 22 year old today (man or woman), trannymaxxing is actually tame.
>not abusebait doormats either, presumably
Yeah, it's crazy how younger women and men read "abusebait" when I say I'm his submissive loyal wife. It's like so many people suddenly lost all common sense all at once.
Ig the silver lining is that all of this makes my personal life easier. We're both motivated to make our marriage work because otherwise, what are we gonna do? Date again in this environment at 35? Lol. Lmao even.

>>44216688
>can you elaborate on that one?
No, not really. This cannot be explained mechanically, anon. You have to see it to understand it.
I'm sorry but a lot about real life is experience and feeling, not a mechanical manual or script.
Idk, start with this - https://www.nature.com/articles/srep01214
But again, you can't learn this through scientific reports or through text online. It won't work. You have to live this in person IRL. Anything less than that is suboptimal and leads to poor and dysfunctional understanding, thus rendering you dysfunctional.
>>44216702
>all inter/intrasexual interactions are competitive and adversarial
Yeah, that's certainly not how this works.
It's also not always subtle, although women are more alike than men.
And by the way: women shit-test other women too, not just men. That's why what's "self-evident" to women is not self-evident at all to most men, least of all autistic men.
It's why I can't explain all of this in a 4chan post. Heck, I couldn't explain it in text even in 100,000 words. One has to live through it to get it.
The "Chad" is usually not a 6'5'' muscular guy. But a 5'10'' guy who lived through these shittests and figured it out what makes women tick. Once you see it, you cannot unsee it. But you also can't describe it in text.

>>44216733
the good part is that they (the men AND the women) are also craving to be released from this algorithmic blackpillcel gender war D&C prison - doomscrolling and bedrotting entered the normie lexicon, so that's a promising sign. the first step is giving a name to the enemy, and all that
so it seems like the usual societal immune system, the common sentiment seems to be opening up toward a happier and less stressed existence
>idk if I should be happy about that or upset.
I think it's normal given the circumstances - most normies (cis women in this case) learn the stuff the regular way, while you had to deliberately, consciously work your way through a lot of it, so you were in a better position to notice and skip some of the bullshit. the great part is that others do listen and it does work for some
>>44216784
oh I'm a guy, and had to work through at least some of that stuff (including the contrast of having moved between eastern and western europe), so I (putting my mansplaining hat on) think I could write some words about the shit-tests, the ways to handle them, how to carry oneself, a positive spin on the whole thing, etc; but I'm obviously not in a position to experience the woman-to-woman interactions
thanks for the responses nona, it's always interesting to read what you have to say. it was pretty neat to see some more eastern european posters in the thread you linked to

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>>44203219
Is it better or worse for the transmaxx population that the general tranny population puts in very little effort into their transition? Compared to what people here say and do, the average tranny just kinda takes estrogen then expects it to do all the work then complains when their ogrehon brick body is still non passing years later

>>44216825
>it was pretty neat to see some more eastern european posters in the thread you linked to
I am eastern European too. I continue to live here.
Westoids are even more insane. Besides, the economic growth is here for now. Once I get SRS I'll find a way to make it impossible to get outed. You know eastern Europe. There's always a way if you have money :)
>you had to deliberately, consciously work your way through a lot of it, so you were in a better position to notice and skip some of the bullshit
That is true. Which is also why I am wary of autists trying to troonmaxx. I believe in bodily autonomy in an absolute sense so far from me to try to gatekeep. But I think all bubbles (the tranny one being no exceptions) are rife with unrealistic expectations and enormous piles of garbage and bullshit.
>so it seems like the usual societal immune system, the common sentiment seems to be opening up toward a happier and less stressed existence
I like your optimism. I can only hope and pray that you'll be proven right.
Most people could really use some slowing tf down from all of this.
>mansplaining
Gosh I hate that term. And really nearly all westoid feminism atp. It teaches women things that are objectively harmful for their prospects at a fulfilling life and it demonizes men to the point of jeopardizing civilization.
And then this kind of feminism seeps into tranny communities and that's how we get trannies leaning heavily into misandry thinking that that makes them more 'real'. Ugh.
I really hope you're right and that there still is a societal immune system that can at least alleviate some of this shit. I will be an old hag by the time that happens though.

>>44216784
nta but I admire your patience and kindness.
God knows this board could use a lot more of that.

>>44216733
I'm not a trannymaxxer at all but a lot of what you've said recently has resonated with me and I appreciate you sharing your experience. <3
I've been depressed the past few years and as a result I stopped treating my husband with the care he deserves. I'm honestly surprised he hasn't left me.

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>>44216877
i have autism and a lack of male socialization, but im not unaware of peoples emotions or their sarcasm or when the room gets awkward or where someone is actually looking, my autism is more an executive failure because of my motor skills and likely a pair of adhd with it, but i force myself to stay clean and orderly
do i have any hope in your opinion

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>>44216866
not OP but I think overall it's neither good nor bad.
I don't think the average tranny is like you describe (picrel). It's just that those who make it then stop posting about it and then just move on to live their lives as women.
I suppose as optics the behavior you describe is not great. But then again, most trannymaxxers do pass and end up in some form of marriage. So in society they end up being perceived as normie women, rather than trannies.
What's really bad is that so many dysphoric trannies outright refuse guidance from elders ('tru' or transmaxxers).

>>44216866
I understand what you mean but in daily life sooner or later you deal with many situations where you won't be able to edit reality like pictures nor have any kinda of makeup or very curated outfits.

I mean spontaneous social gatherings, going to the beach (if you like that/are near one, etc.), waking up next to someone you hooked up with 100% naked with no makeup, doing sports, daily job meetings, etc. etc.

In all those situations you mostly have what you can achieve through HRT and weight cycling. Maybe add some skincare, FFS and similar surgeries if you're lucky/wealthy. You can't always rely on curating your image through clothes, makeup, jewelry and such even though it of course helps. Many, many times it's just your raw image. Unless you start transition before puberty the bones won't change a single bit.

Saying this because even though you bring a good point there were so many situations I didn't even considered before transition that I'd like to have someone mention to me, I've detransd a while ago in part from all those constant weekly, sometimes daily, random situations that end up wearing you out.

>>44216877
>You know eastern Europe. There's always a way if you have money :)
Amen to that, I definitely noticed how much more humane the bureaucracy can be when I visited a month ago to fix a few things.
>all bubbles (the tranny one being no exceptions) are rife with unrealistic expectations and enormous piles of garbage and bullshit.
That's why I love women like you, wifemoder and others occasionally dropping by and sharing some of that wisdom that people used to get from the wiser folks in their environment.
>Most people could really use some slowing tf down from all of this.
One of the parts I like about the current place (though that may be the case in other places too) is that people in formal contexts nowadays do talk about artsy-fartsy stuff such as meditation/awareness, how to approach stress, how to approach interactions, boundaries, how to more effectively rest and recreate (adapting for the new forms of mental stress).
Just a few weeks ago we were having a job training that was going exactly about those topics, and people were sharing about how things like painting can be therapeutic for them. I would poke and prod, as the self-designated awkwardness lightning rod, bringing up topics about how that sort of stuff is actually a fantastic way to spend time with low-thinking hands-on activities that can be both meditative, as well as social, and how that can even translate for us stoic macho rock men that never crumble and dont need no mental health (UK's men's sheds, for example).
The hunger for moments of peaceful slowness is there, and when we're lucky enough, those can be easy to be had once we make it a deliberate process.
>Gosh I hate that term.
I like that it's about a decade and a half after the really inflamed parts of that SJW flare-up (although we have a bit of a knee-jerk reaction too). In trusted environments with good rapport (thinking of non-edgelord women too), it's fun to use it playfully, your
>now lemme mansplain to ya toots
and so on.

Bump

>>44203219
how do you trannymax? asking as a 6 year hrt manmoder or do i just live the rest of my life as a man on hrt

>>44218670
What is your age and sexuality

>>44218687
im 25 i already know its over lol ill be in my 30s before i can afford ffs and by then ill be an old unlovable hag

>>44218836
I am too :.(

>>44218836
>>44218873
i am only 20 :)

@incel to trannymaxxer
In >>44210432 you talked about how you managed to give yourself AGP, to allow you to live a fulfilled life as a woman.

I am AGP, only slightly dysphoric, but never in my life (22y/o) fapped to anything other than feminization and submission fantasies. Fantasizing about being sexually intimate with other ppl is completely foreign to me.
Hence, I am content with being single for life.

I like my male drive, strength (even tho I am not really muscular), assertiveness.
I got memed into trying E for ~7 months by this board and reddit.

I now know that outside of sexual fantasy, I never want to feel so weak, vulnerable and exposed again as I felt on E.
I will not transition. I will not HRTrep.

Is there any way for me to do the inverse of what you did, to develop a normal sexuality (gay or straight, don't care) that doesn't involve myself being submissive and feminized?

>>44219247
Different person but if you have any androphilia you can give yourself AAP since you already have an ETLE. Try enjoying your male features like penis and pecs in the mirror

>>44219247
...or, alternatively, to just accept my AGP as a kink, without it turning into an obsession / pseudo-dysphoria / FOMO when I'm in a stressful / fearful situation again (which was the case when I first started HRT)

I'm prepared to put significant effort into this

>>44219259
I have only very slight androphilia. Could also be that it is partly suppressed, due to growing up in a conservative environment.
So, I guess I could try to cultivate that...

What would be the mental framework for that then? Getting ripped in the gym and then fantasizing about how I could dominate others with my penis? I mean, I've literally never cared about the idea of inserting it into another human being...

>>44219247
NTA but estrogen hasn't made me feel weak, vulnerable or exposed, I think that's just psychological, from internalised misogyny.

>>44219297
Yeah I think that could work

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>>44215613
>but the prospects of being essentially conquered, cant think of a better word, is tingling hot
Yep! You're beginning to see why submissiveness and androphilia are such a nice combo...
>but i still want the hypothetical him to actually truly love me and cherish me too, not only just a fetish play
When you find a good guy you'll find this love comes naturally to him and to you when you genuinely care for him too, and maybe act cute for him too in the process.
>because i want a proper new life like what you all told me you had in my own thread instead
>my life so far was really invisible and lonely
Have you taken any steps since that thread, anon?

>>44215645
>Is there a point or need for revisions if you don’t care about complete anatomical accuracy and just want an approximation.
There may be a need if there are small things that need corrected.
>Not like I’ve ever seen a vagina IRL, so it being a bit off wouldn’t bother me much as long as it doesn’t look disgusting.
Tbh, you'll probably find that it matters more once you have it. I didn't care about revisions at all initially but after healing I wanted to be just a little more pretty down there for my bf. But maybe you'll truly not care much in the end and won't need a revision, who knows?

>>44216186
>And it's not your fault you have these views!
>No, nona, you weren't "supposed" to have a wife and start a family, you were supposed to have been born a woman to begin with, it's who you are, otherwise you wouldn't have gone through all this trouble to be one.
>You don't have to hold yourself to standards of masculinity anymore, you're a woman, doing what women are expected to do.
Thank you for all of these reassurances Nona <3

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>>44219623
>Have you taken any steps since that thread, anon?
im waiting on my order to arrive, im too scared of needles so i just found some seller that does pills and paid for that, both estrogen and anti androgens
>Yep! You're beginning to see why submissiveness and androphilia are such a nice combo...
who knew being a physically abused little loser would turn out like this in the end

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>>44216200
Correct, because I am a man

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>>44216105
>but he can relatively easily overpower me so having enough trust in him to be naked underneath him and not just let him but actively crave him pounding me has definitely done something to my head too.
Yes I completely get that! I also love touching his chest or wrapping my hands behind his neck during it. It's also really hot when he can easily just "force" a kiss on me in that position... I would love to be able to orgasm while doing missionary with him too, but like you said it'll probably require a lot of training and patience on my part.
>while his cum is slowly leaking out all I can think of is either how to hug him better or reach out for his dick and gently ask for another round.
I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but this really seems like standard and wholesome straight woman sexuality. You were definitely meant to be in that position rather than a male role.
>Why feel weird tho?
Because it seems just a little misogynistic so I feel like a hypocrite for wanting to be a woman yet finding this hot.
>Idk about your guy but he won't stop (I wouldn't want him to anyway) until he cums.
Tbh I've never asked him to stop (nor would I). I honestly find the concept of wanting him to stop but him not stopping to be extremely arousing...
>Lowkey I'm happy when he cums even if I haven't.
Same. I feel really attractive and a little validated when he cums in me.
>Try mounting it on a wall (or some other vertical surface) and replicate the moves with your body.
I'll definitely try this.

>>44216300
>What technique?
NTA, but PPT or Suporn method can give you self-lubrication.

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>>44216321
>Step 1: Stopped being afraid of them.
This is definitely something I struggle with. Probably another aspect of the male ego I mentioned in the OP. Even though I don't want anything from women that a man would want I still feel like they perceive me as a male that wants that.
Part of the problem might be that I am *out* at work (due to initially transitioning there) so I'm very cagey about my personal life to people. I know that people who know I'm trans will assume I top or something when I say I have a bf, and it's not like I'm going to tell them that I've had SRS either.
The other aspect is that I probably just don't get out enough and don't meet many new people, either women or men.

>>44216924
>I mean spontaneous social gatherings, going to the beach (if you like that/are near one, etc.), waking up next to someone you hooked up with 100% naked with no makeup, doing sports, daily job meetings, etc. etc.
I honestly feel like both chuds and r.ddit trannies both need to hear this. Like, do chuds honestly think that trans women walk up next to our men in the morning, have sex with them, shower with them, and still assume we're holding up some kind of anglefrauding or makeup all that time to fool him into thinking were women? Do r.ddit trannies especially the ones who don't think passing matters think that they're going to get gendered as a woman when they're in a bathing suit and haven't grown out their hair, taken care of their body, and had the snip?

>>44216902
NTA but you really should get the depression treated, for your sake and his. It can be really hard on both of you to live with it long term.

>>44218670
>>44218836
You're 25 with 6 years on HRT? Nona that's comparatively a really good spot to be in. I started HRT at 25 and pass now.
>How do you trannymaxx
In your case the most important thing is probably to just come out. Use the change and public spotlight on your trans status as motivation to work on your body, makeup, voice, mannerisms, ect.

>>44219671
>im waiting on my order to arrive
That's good anon <3. I remember you were struggling with getting started on that in the last thread.
>im too scared of needles so i just found some seller that does pills and paid for that,
Pills are absolutely okay. With the E it might be best to take it sublingually (absorbed under the tongue) and to go from 2mg to 4mg to 6mg in the first 3 months.

>>44220189
whats the difference between just swallowing them and this sublingual stuff

>>44203219
anon why do you keep posting firefly/hotaru from honkai star rail (HSR)? it makes me sad because she's so pretty :((((
Which Genshin Impact girl you like tho

>>44220214
Just swallowing it makes it pass through the liver before it hits the bloodstream, so a lot of it is wasted and the liver has to deal with filtering more medication.

>>44216784
How over is it if you’re 5’5? Feel like killing myself

>>44220686
I'm 5'5 too and pass just fine stfu nona

>>44220686
>>44220711
I mean for a guy

>>44203219
after i started hrt my dexter type dark passenger internal monologue disappeared completely and i no longer think in that manner. i now think in a more instinctual and fragmented way rather than having a continuous audible narration

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>>44203778
>https://sissylover.com/blog/think-like-a-girl-10-girly-routines-to-feminize-your-mind/
the first thing here is to watch popular media directed towards women. I feel like this is one of those boring things that is only engaging in a meta way. like, it's so hot that I have to give up my male interests...but as a behavior it just makes you a consumer? maybe there is something to the idea of committing without expecting any result for the sake of understanding the culture, but what culture are you actually hooking onto besides mainstream consumer base? and how many trannies actually benefit from trying to fit in there, mef or not...? I feel like the intelligence can be used for more engaging, powerful, new ways of programming, rather than just subscribing to some executive board's idea of what a woman's life is.

>>44221788
This is why most trannies view sissy stuff as cringe af.

Bump

>>44216866
It's worse for them, not for me. I have a tranny friend (more like acquaintance) who needed 2 years until she finally believed me that she reads as autistic male because she doesn't put any effort into her mannerisms and demeanor/behavior.
She looks better than I do, dresses better than I do and her voice is way better than mine. Yet when we're out in public, she is assumed my feminine bf if the interaction lasts for more than 10 seconds. She only got better in the last 2-3 months when she finally took my advice seriously.
That's the issue with taking one's information from online sources exclusively and, even worse, from the most depressed or shut-in trannies.
>>44216902
Get your depression treated, nona.
Your husband is a good man for sticking it out through your troubles, but it's unreasonable to abuse his trust and love in perpetuity. He needs you functional as well and both of your quality of life is diminished if you continue to not take your mental health seriously.
This isn't even tranny specific. Lots of cis women make this mistake too. It's easy to settle into comfort.
>>44216917
>do i have any hope in your opinion
I don't know you personally. However, you say:
>i force myself to stay clean and orderly
This reads that you CAN be disciplined. All you need to do is apply that discipline more broadly.

>>44222788
> get your depression treated, nona
Trust me, I'm working on it. I stopped taking care of myself and also put on some pounds so I'm in the process of fixing that. I want to avoid becoming overmedicated like my mother was for her depression, even though I know it'd help.

>>44219247
>Hence, I am content with being single for life.
Easy to say at 22. I coped like that too at exactly the same age. Then I tried more realistically to date men and was still invisible. A year later I was running out of options.
>I never want to feel so weak, vulnerable and exposed again as I felt on E
Psychological effect, not physiological.
I'm marginally weaker at a muscular level (1 to 5% less strength) after 8+ years. But I certainly don't feel vulnerable or exposed. Not outside of sex anyway.
You weren't memed, but rather you memed yourself. And I don't mean the part of trying E, but the part where you felt weak and vulnerable. That's not the fault of a exogenous chemical compound, but the fault of your internal chemistry guided largely by your thoughts.
>Is there any way for me to do the inverse of what you did, to develop a normal sexuality (gay or straight, don't care)
Maybe.
>that doesn't involve myself being submissive and feminized?
Haha, no.
You're more AGP at 22 than I am now. You fundamentally do crave to be submissive. Thinking you can change that is unreasonable. Human sexuality is malleable to an extent, but not to the extent you wish. You are effectively asking for conversion therapy here. Sorry, that won't work.
>or, alternatively, to just accept my AGP as a kink
That may work. As >>44219259 said, you could try to lean into being more AAP and try to date men. It may still not work. It didn't work for me and I tried. But it's worth a shot for sure!
Although you tried E, you ascribed (and still do ascribe) magical properties to it. The "worst" thing E does to your mind is to unrepress your androphilia. That's it. It doesn't turn you into a different person and most certainly doesn't make you weaker.
>
What would be the mental framework for that then? Getting ripped in the gym and then fantasizing about how I could dominate others with my penis?
Haha, no. More like getting cuter as a femfag.

>>44220686
>>44222788
What is your opinion on this?

>>44222893
If you're 5'5 in the Netherlands, then change country. If you're 5'5 in southern Europe, you're just below the average. If you're 5'5 in Ecuador, you may in fact be a bit above average, heh.
Roping is never a solution, anon. Never. If trannymaxxing had failed for me, I would've moved on to try to change the country and lean into being a faggot. If that had failed too, I would've joined the church. Or try to become some philosopher (seems like I have a knack for it when I try hard).
Yes, 5'5'' is pretty damn brutal. I know because I am 5'5'' but the more time has passed and lived more as socially female I realize that height wasn't my biggest problem. There are women 167cm or shorter around and many of them do end up married with guys 170cm or shorter. My biggest problem was being invisible and in part because I was a social retard.
Also, it does depend on where you are. I am Eastern European (but not Montenegrin or Lithuanian - where median height is huge). Being short isn't something to be bullied on most of the time. Other places in the world are more "heightist"(is that even a word?) for sure.
If you can't (or don't want to) troonmaxx, then your best option still remains trying to address your social retardation and georgraphical arbitrage if being sexually desired is what you crave the most. Again, I'm not judging. I trannymaxxed at least in part because I wanted to be sexually desired. But I was also a bifag as a starting point and not autistic, so fixing social retardation was still easier than it is for autists or tru dysphorics.

>>44222958
I'm in the US and want to get with girls in college but I'm also basically invisible. I do get approached/ hit on by women but very rarely and has only ever landed me one relationship

>>44223006
>one relationship
fakecel

>>44223017
idk I've been mindraped by bnwo

waow. the thread is still up?
>>44219814
>it'll probably require a lot of training and patience on my part
Keep in mind that the "training" is fun. It's not a chore. Even when it doesn't "work" you still get a lot of fun and enjoy a nice afterglow.
>this really seems like standard and wholesome straight woman sexuality
It is. I know because sometimes when I chat with my cisf friends they describe something similar. And I'm pervy enough to take notes and try new things.
>You were definitely meant to be in that position rather than a male role
I have the advantage (dare I say the privilege) of having been in both. 10 years ago I'd wake up next to my gf as a young straight man.
Idk and I don't think I was "meant" to anything. Certainly being in love plays a big role in me enjoying this a lot more, but also unironically srs. There is no going back for me and that has had a stabilizing effect on my mind.
I don't think I'll stop anytime soon from being a mef perv but I stopped being ashamed of it a long time ago.
Whether I was "meant" to or not, whatever that means, is immaterial now. For all intends and purposes I'm a straight woman for almost everyone and that's the path of least resistance for the rest of my life too.
>seems just a little misogynistic
It's not misogynistic to point out observable and largely unchangeable difference.
>feel like a hypocrite for wanting to be a woman yet finding this hot
Nona, the vast majority of cis women do fit the clinical definition of AGP.
There's nothing wrong or hypocritical for wanting to enjoy your life, including sexually. Healthy people are also sexual beings.
This is why I don't hang out in (post?)modern tranny spaces. There's more sexual repression in most of them than in a traditional church, lol.
>>44222877
Girl, we need to talk. I have a feeling we're much closer to each other geographically than you think.
Got an e-mail or something?

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>>44220534
oh, okay that makes sense
>>44222788
>This reads that you CAN be disciplined. All you need to do is apply that discipline more broadly.
i will! i dont want to fail at this life changing decision

>>44220177
NTA
>do chuds honestly think that trans women walk up next to our men in the morning, have sex with them, shower with them, and still assume we're holding up some kind of anglefrauding or makeup all that time to fool him into thinking were women
No. The chuds assume we're lying or our lovers are pure androphilic fags. Most chuds legit don't know that a significant number of bifags in fact do crave trannies. Also, chuds assume bicurious straight men don't exist.
>Do r.ddit trannies especially the ones who don't think passing matters think that they're going to get gendered as a woman when they're in a bathing suit and haven't grown out their hair, taken care of their body, and had the snip?
No. More like r.dit trannies have no idea whatsoever about how real life functions to begin with. Ofc, not all, but the most vocal of them are like that.
I haven't browsed there in years but I doubt things changed that much. When I was recovering from SRS it was a funny pastime with my bf to read delusional tranny takes.
Particularly funny were those who said they pass at the beach as pre-ops and with short hair.
There's also the subset who think that if you're not a 9+/10 model then you basically don't pass. There are quite a few of those on this board too.
Ultimately both have the same problem: undersocialized and shut-ins. They literally lost contact with reality (some never had one to begin with).
It also doesn't help that a lot of r.dit trannies are just not that determined (some cope by saying they're poor, but it's usually not true). Like once in 2022 (again, as I was recovering from srs) told me to check my privilege for being able to afford SRS. Turns out she was making more than I do (ofc she did, she was American, I'm europoor) but just had bad spending habits. She blocked me when I simply said that ultimately it is a matter of will: Do you want to be a woman or not? There is no "wrong" answer, but actions do point out to a clear answer.

>>44220177
>I know that people who know I'm trans will assume I top or something when I say I have a bf
NTA but why would they assume that?
Granted, I don't tell everyone (or even most people) I interact with that I'm a tranny now that I can easily pull the slightly quirky straight woman vibe, but of those that do know it'd be quite odd if they were to assume that since before I actually passed I already leaned heavily into what this board would call "honfidence", except I wasn't insisting on being she/her'd (I still don't, it just happens all the time). Flaming/fruity behavior (or w/e you wanna call it) is default bottom coded in my area, lol.
>and it's not like I'm going to tell them that I've had SRS either
Of course you're not gonna tell that to people at work. None of their business.
With that said, one of my closest female friends became much closer when I told her I'll be having difficulties visiting her because I'm having SRS and walking for a few months will be hard. We've gotten way closer ever since.
Lowkey cis women are way more willing to accept trannies as other women if they're postop. It's not a good thing or a bad thing. It just is. I don't even blame them. I also see myself way more of a woman now than I did in 2021 for sure.

I feel like I'd never be able to be comfortable thinking of myself as transmaxxing or mef or whatever the fuck unless I had at least gotten srs. Like it seems it would be validating in a way where even if I were to get clocked at some point in my life I'd no longer care.

>>44218670
>>44218836
Work more, save up more and look into personal loans to speed up the process of affording FFS. That's what I did. I finished paying for the loan I took for FFS this year, almost 6 years after I contracted it.
In the meantime, get laser (if you haven't already), grow your hair out, look into tailoring to get femcoded clothes and for God's sake start befriending women and imitate them.
If you're androphilic, start trying to date men, like yesterday. Nobody is coming to save you. Stop letting your life pass by you.
>[by 30] ill be an old unlovable hag
Purge this mentality too. It's toxic and simply false. I got married at almost 32. I was still an incel on hrt at 25, lol.
Life doesn't end at 25 or at 30. Or at 40 for that matter. Life is short, but not THAT short.
>>44223123
>Got an e-mail or something?
Sure. incelnona[at]proton.me
It may take a long time for me to reply though. Especially now in the summer when I'm mostly outdoors during my spare time.

>>44203219
I don't have any advice but I noticed immediately after giving in to my tranny thoughts a few weeks ago that a huge part of this male guilt just disappeared. I mean I already lived with my bf so I wasn't living the typical male life but I felt this subconcious pressure that I'm supposed to conform and live according to how society thinks a man should live and I felt a little guilty that I didn't want to or couldn't. Then it all just disappeared when I gave myself a female mental voice instead of a male voice one time and I cracked. Felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders