i have no aspirations, no drive, no desire to do anything really. i hate what i'm studying; i'd much prefer to just sit around all day and go through my reading stack. tl;dr: should i cease my atheism, convert to christianity, and become a monk?
>>24761859Monks don't sit around all day and read.Should have been born a trust-fund kid if you wanted to do nothing but read. Good luck in your next life.
>>24761859Just become a flaneur>captcha 8884YLucky 8
>>24761859as the other anon said, monks don't just sit around all day and read but if you truly become a believer, you might find the monastic ascetical labours to be appealing to you but in any case, you should first become a layman so try to stand for one-two hours for an orthodox liturgy, pray at least 30 minutes to one hour per day and fast, if you can't even do that then monasticism is not for you
Two authors that really helped me when I was despondent and drifting through life were Ernst Junger and Oswald Spengler. They helped me not because they were chuds or made specific ethical prescriptions or prediction, but because in both cases these guys laid out in their books a vision of taking something grand, historical, even eternal as their polestar. I really started to feel like so much of my problem was expecting to inherit some kind of purpose for my life in an epoch that is fundamentally shallow and meaningless. So what could I do in light of that? I could live in a such a way that would be appropriate for another time, or all-time. For Junger that was channeling the muse for stories and poetry, prepping the ground for a time that would come long after him. For Spengler that was directing the advance towards an inevitable history and legacy. The essential thing in either case was to understand oneself not as a man of this time, but of all time. Just because our time is fake and gay doesn’t mean we have to be. We can still write ballads, and mythologies, dedicate our lives to contemplation, religious apology, or even martyrdom, seem virtue and deed, the enshrinement of a legacy, to direct politics in which a way as to shape it through a history that is inevitable, or simply to cope with life with good books, a bit of creativity, some art, some wine, some good friends, whatever. There are innumerable ways we can find our vocation in life but understanding this greater vision of my life as part of some kind of world-historical-cosmic record rather than this particular time has been enormously helpful for me.
>>24761859sooner or later your atheism shall cease and like it or not you belong to Christ like everyone elsethat said, i was in an extremely similar position and i can refer to an article that helped me:https://mechanicalowlblog.wordpress.com/2018/03/04/after-the-future-or-roger-sworder-among-the-machines/
>>24761859Ah, the melancholoy refrain of the trust-fund baby.If you weren't so degenerately rich, you'd have the drive to make something of yourself.
The only aspirations and drive I have are related to literature and languages I work a cushy min wage job and have no desire to work on my careerDuring work I try to memorise poems and work on my languages
>>24761859read Oblomov
>>24761859The monks at the monastery near my house wake up at 3:15 in the morning for nocturns every day, 365 days a year. They have time for reading and prayer between about 3:40 and 5:15 when the next canonical hour starts. Then they work a full day. Compline is at 7:30 so there is never more than a 7 hour break between the hours.That's Cistercian living. I imagine Orthodox life is even fuller because their Liturgy of the Hours is quite a bit longer and they do midnight prayer too. Also, during Lent compline in like an hour long.
