You will never be a real Englishman. You have no rotting teeth, you have no stiff upper lip, you have no posh accent. You are an American man twisted by tea and crumpets into a crude mockery of nature’s perfection.All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your horrid table manners behind closed doors.Englishwomen are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed Englishwomen to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even Yanks who “pass” look uncouth and unrefined to an Englishwoman. Your non-silly walk is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunken lass home with you for a jolly old fashioned rogering, she’ll turn tail and bolt the second she gets a whiff of your mutilated, circumcised prick.You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with the flag of your birthplace, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know an American is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a body of work that is unmistakably American.This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.
>>24772646Geez
Then how come a good portion of americans cluster and collate almost exactly with englishmen?
No one wants to be a disgusting inbred angloid. That's why so many old stock Americans identify as Irish or German or even just American.
>>24772646This dude spent his career pretending to be English and donned a fake accent only to get laughed out of the royal palace during a reading
>>24772646Stop being so harsh, man.
>>24772686I wish I was born in the Uk instead to be honest. I feel zero connection to America at all. My family is well entrenched here for generations going all the way back. But honestly I hate this country and can't identify with it whatsoever
>>24772646His LARP was very convincing tbqh
>>24772844You‘d think they‘d be pretty enthusiastic to incorporate somebody who could be called their only literary achievement in the first half of the 20th century.
>>24772686>>24772966I actually think being inbred is a good thing. It enables racial purity and lower IQ which means you end up with above replacement birth rates.
>>24772646someone should make a comedy about TS Eliot wanting to get in on the high-watermark English publishing culture only to arrive here too late and become stuck where the villages are no longer quiant, the Blairites have gotten rid of any sentiments of ambition in the country and the millionaires of rich English patrons have left London for Monaco, Singapore or Geneva.
>>24772966At least you might have the option to travel which is unavailable to me. I have similar issues. We've been here since the 1600s and don't have enough money to escape. I also suffer from an inability to learn foreign languages.
