>put an invisibility cloak
>go to female dorm
not what i would do

>>24882539
sexo with 12 year old white girls

>>24882539
Have sex

>>24882539
sneak into that forbidden library section with all of the black magic books

>>24882539
see the erised mirror

>>24882539

>Students dying or getting maimed or assaulted every year
>A whole quarter of the school is just waiting with bated breath for some cult leader alum to give the signal to massacre the rest of the school in their sleep.
>school doesn’t teach you reading, writing, or math.

…..bros…. I’m going to transfer.

>>24882577
sounds like america

>>24882539
I want to visit the dungeon with my crush (male) and have bdsm torturesex. I will cast the tickle spell constantly on cute guys

I've managed to never read or watch any harry potter books or movies.

smoke that herbology magic shrooms with the yellow guild

>>24882539
fuck those slutty ravenclaw bitches.

>>24882539
Post about it on /lit/

>>24882539
find the treasury and loot all the good shit

Probably the same thing I do in this world, jack shit

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the sexspells and potions must be off the charts

>>24882539
Try to fug Luna, of course. fanfic assures me she's an absolute freak

Its not something that needs to be told
I'm just getting old

bully Huffelpuff students

>>24882539
Avada kedavra my classmates

>>24882577
Tell me you didn't read the books without not telling me you didn't read the books

>>24882785
That's all true and based though.

>>24882577
>A whole quarter of the school is just waiting with bated breath for some cult leader alum to give the signal to massacre the rest of the school in their sleep.
That's just how society works. Read about the Chinese Cultural Revolution

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>>24882791
>not reading the books is based
The absolute state of modern /lit/

>>24882808
>animetroon can't read
Pottery.

>>24882552
No matter how long you stare you will never be a woman

>>24882812
please don't say that

>>24882712
She loves good

>>24882539
kill myself because i must be a troon to like harry potter

>>24882850
It's against the law to be a troon and like harry potter

>>24882539
well the first thing I have to do is get used to my new name, Luigi Arrivederci

>>24882539

Understand the fundamental basis of magic (which is never explained in the books), and hack the system for personal profit.

>>24882539
Use magic to rape

>>24882545
>>24882546
You can’t have sex irl how the fuck would you have it in hogwars

>>24882539
Rape, torture, kill

>>24882972
trickery

Master invisibility and memory erasing spells. What I do to girls is basically a victimless crime if they don't remember it.

>>24882940
powerful wizards can literally wipe out your memories and they do it all the time to non magic normies. good luck with that

Can one use the control spell to make himself more productive? Like 'imperio finish reading that book'

>>24882539
Prepare some polyjuice potion, steal some of Romilda Vane hair, and get gang banged by the whole dormitory
Then just get thorough the rest of the school year as normal and study to become some government wagie I guess

>>24882995
do some people accept that they are average?

>>24882988
I just drink skooma recreationally when I need to study or clean the house

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>bullies you

>>24882539
Learn lewd magic so I can peak at the girls' panties and bras

>>24883008
How tf did chavs like craby and goyle get into slytherin

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Group masturbation in the Hufflepuff dorms

>>24883048
Ugly = evil

>>24883082
It's supposed to be all upper crust well bred rich kids

>>24883124
just an expression of middle class hatred for poor and rich

Go jerk off in myrtle's bathroom.

>>24883124
Harry was almost Slytherin and he wasn't rich. Slytherin is the house for sneaky and ambitious kids, not necessarily evil or rich kids.

>>24882665
I feel like Hufflepuff would be the sluttiest one. They'd be eager to compensate for their lack of magical skills.

>>24882649
I managed that too for the longest time but decided on watching the movies for the game. Unsurprisingly they were not worth all the hype and constant discussion they received back in the day.

>>24883268
Harry was filthy rich, his dad was loaded and left him everything in the jewish bank vault?

>>24883295
Harry lived with the Dursleys. He wasn't born with a silver spoon in his mouth.

>>24883312
but Dumbledore literally forced the Dursleys to send Harry to the magic school. he always had the money but of course what can a kid do with money on his own?

>>24882539
Seal my room against spiders.

>>24882539
sex with prime witchussy

Some of you are alright, don't go to potions class tomorrow.

>>24883619
See, this is why we need stricter wand control

>>24883619
erm... but how am I going to score a date with le femme beautifulle de la breton in gryffindor then?

>>24883597
you can't get it irl, what makes you think you'd get it in the hp verse ?

>>24883628
potions class bro. this guy better not spell it up.

>>24882539
Anally rape Dobby's ass with a pineapple

>>24882539
I search for Ching Chong and ask her out

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>>24882539
If Hogwarts was real it would be filled with broccoli-headed mudbloods complaining that their ipads don't work and they can't watch the newest episode of skibidi brainrot

>>24882539
>What do you do?
Close the thread

>>24882539
Walk around the halls accio-ing girls panties left and right

>>24882539
I help Voldemort conquer Hogwarts in exchange for my very own loli harem.

>>24882539
I'd go all in on architectural magic, everything from construction to spacial distortion. Then build the raddest wizard castle and carry it around in one of those old-school duffel bags.

>>24883008
>rape them because im a 43 year old retarded guy

>>24882539
Probably rape

>>24884052
Rape who?

>>24884062
Vulnerable females

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>>24882539
have sex with wizard women

>>24882972
Rape, magically.

>>24882665
>>24883272
Most to least sluttiest:
Hufflepuff > Gryffindor > Slytherin > Ravenclaw

It would be really fucking degenerate desu. I would be using poly juice and love potions to fuck everything. The room of requirement would become my sex palace. I wouldn’t even go to class just be fucking and hiding out in my room and going directly to the house elves for my meals.

>>24882544
you wouldn't do it because the staircase turns into a slide and being invisible doesn't help you because it doesn't trigger based on security camera footage
not that Hogwarts has any actual safeguards for that kind of thing, two guys and a girl hung out in an abandoned girl's bathroom for months and they let the girl ghost spy on the boys' bathhouse

>>24882810
You're on an anime website, nigger ape. And stop thinking about troons, if you can help it.

>>24882539
So, what would you do if...

>fuck!!!!

No wait, I didn't finish, what would you do if you where a student of hogwarts.

>I would heckin fuckerino!!!!

Right, but you are basically the same shy schizoid, put you now have access to unending libraries full of strange lore, mystical powers you can use and teachers who are are incredibly old and wise, also....

>Immma gonna fuck all le hecking cunnyyy!!!! AAHHHA

oke, never mind, continue as you are.

I'm going to go against the grain and not be a pedo.

>>24885737
Fag

>>24885713
the virgin lorescholar vs the chad cunnyrapist

>>24882539
Be a dutiful student and learn as much as possible because magic is an amazing tool and I want to master it, and I also don't want to get in trouble and get kicked out of this amazing opportunity.

You can be as degenerate as you want once you learn all the magical secrets.

>>24885713
>but you now have access to unending libraries full of strange lore, mystical powers you can use and teachers who are are incredibly old and wise, also....
You talk like this shit is fucking Earthsea anon, Howarts is way shittier.

>>24886159
Only spell you can actually cast in the Earthsea is some nothing illusion, everything else can disturb le balance.

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>>24882539
Kill Hermonie.

>>24888164
Rape Hermione.

>>24882641
Kek
Underrated

Cast "Uncontrollable Shitting" on Hermione

Cast "Widen Mouth" on myself

>>24882577
Right but enough about the UK public school system, this thread is supposed to be about Hogwarts.

Smoke some shit, cast a spell of 'Get High' on a passer-by. Evade detection at all costs, stick close to the walls so I don't get caught lacking in the elongated halls. Chop a mandrake plant into little bits, roll it into a blunt and puff puff pass infront of Pomona Sprout.

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>>24885713

>>24885713
Rape this guy

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>>24882539
Have sex and rape people

>>24882539
Rape with my wand

>>24888427
What if I rape your wand?

>>24882539
I'd sneak into their rooms and create magical portals in their panties that all lead back to a portal in my room so that at anytime I can stick my penis inside my portal and simultaneously fuck every girl in the school.

>>24882539
laugh at the isekai plot for too long, then feel right at home

>>24888468
How do you ensure they'll all be wearing the right enchanted pair of panties at the same time? What if only a few of them are statistically ever wearing the right pairs at once and you end up fucking 3 girls and 250 panty drawers every time you want to multifuck?

>>24882539
I would unionize my fellow wizard students and fight against the systematic microagreasions against my fellow trans wizard sisters

>>24888138
What I mean is that what you are describing, the libraries full of lore and wise old teachers paint a different type of fantasy, something more akin to a serious version of Discworld and Harry Potter is way lamer than that.

Can't even finish your own sentences
Grow up already

>>24888594
This but introducing the idea of unions to house-elves and goblins to utterly shatter the wizarding world. Also teach the goblins how to make AR-15's.

>>24882539
say the word nigger. nigger harry, nigger roastie ho, nigger redhead kid, nigger blonde mentally ill chick, nigger dobby, nigger voldermort

summon a succubus and keep it chained up as a sex slave

>>24888493
Good question. There's a couple solutions I thought of:
I could leave one enchanted pair of panties behind but steal all the other unenchanted pairs for wearing on my face.
I could create a complex form of enchantment that only activates when the panties are worn.

>>24882539
commit magical suicide
>>24882972
No, no you misunderstand, he is going to make a polyjuice potion and drink it to become a girl he likes then get fucked by other boys and teachers then consider it as him having sex with her.

>>24882539
Find a place to make my home, not a barren dry hole, nor a hobbit hole, but a wet hole of one of the Slyther-inside girls and coom till i get expelled

Try out for the Quidditch team. Being a beater seems the most fun but if not I'll settle for being the coach.

>>24882649
They were pretty decent for kids. As an adult, I can appreciate the general aesthetic and easy watching but that’s it.

>>24891273
Quidditch is cool but with the cloak of invisibility and stuff like that, I'd most likely be thrown out for being a coomer.
Only other thing I can think of is that apparently some witches and wizards have "spirit animals" that they can just transform into like Sirius Black can turn into a Wolf or Professor McGonagall into a cat. I'd want a power like that, but besides that I'd be a coomer.

>>24882539
Lick Luna's feet

>>24882812
You can be for an hour at a time with enough polyjuice potion.

>>24882539
Probably get kicked out for being a grown man/muggle. If I turned out to be a wizard maybe they have remedial night classes like high schools

>>24882966
Twelve year old Harry and Draco knew the spells Tarentallegra, which binds your legs together, and Rictusempra, which tickles you breathless. Not only that, but Hermione also managed to get the ingredients and recipe to make a polyjuice potion.
Sixth years are able to brew a Draught of Living Death, which causes a deep magical sleep that can't be interrupted. (Hermione also figured out how to do it in her second year too) Petrificus Totalus has a seemingly indefinite duration to it, only being ended by a Finite spell, or death of the wizard who cast it. (also power of love, but have fun trying to plan that one out.)

And if all that wasn't enough, in Half Blood Prince, Draco actually forces his friends to take polyjuice to spy on Harry disguised as an 11 year old girl.

Raping and imprisoning is surprisingly easy in the Wizarding World. Voldemort was a rape baby from a witch mother, and a muggle whom she drugged with love potion. Because of this, He was born without any capacity to feel love.

Does hogwarts have special ed classes?
Can wizards be retarded?

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>>24882539
I'm dedicating the entirety of my existence to being a slytherin, improving my work in the shadows until I eventually come into the world to do what Voldemort couldn't

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>>24891469
>can wizards be retarded?

>>24882539
aoh.
there is now female threads on /lit/?
i didn't know...