Victoria EditionPrevious: >>24975069/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQRESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvCPlease limit excerpts to one post.Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.(And maybe double-space your WIPs to allow edits if you want 'em.)Simple guides on writing:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9shttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk Theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXV1eeTz6Xo
I've written about 100 words in the past 2 months
>Victoria editionWhat a terrible start to the new year
>>24984943Don't hate.
>>24984940That's funny because I've written 25,000 in the last week
He didn't say ten negative things for the rest of his life. The pain was faster than life. Is this curbing? Is this dusk? Or some other dream, a neanderthal clambering?
Is this pretentious? Would you keep reading?
>>24985268it's pretty badI would not continue readingthe vagueness is annoying, but the repetition is worse
>>24985268i am intrigued, anon. but i think you should be more concise.
>>24985268The first paragraph hooks me. I like the philosophical questions it raises about delinquents who commit heinous crimes. The little hints to his crime add intrigue also.The whole rest of it is incredulously pretentious. Loss of the self is a conceptually interesting concept. But your actual point concerning the topic is lost in your flowery language. Circles in on itself too. I think you should keep in mind what your point (or at the very least, the character's point/what he wants us to think he believes) is before you write. It will give the loss of self theming more narrative weight.
I was going to write a western as a series of short stories told by a guy in a saloonBut then I realized I don’t have any good ideas or themes I want to explore in that sort of setting
>>24985577it seems like larry mcmurty is having a moment now
May you all get a book deal in 2026. Happy New Year.
>>24985577Westerns have been a pulp genre in lit, film and tv for so long, and for a good while were THE genre. It's tough to be original and have something unique to say with all of that . That's in part why it all became about gritty anti-heroes and then subversive women and minorities, neo-westerns, and the death of that time period. I do have a great historical story I'vd been holding onto that for some reason has never been novelized or televised and explores themes that don't receive much attention, but you can't have it.
What do I do??????????
>>24985681good dialogue lies just off center. go for verisimilitude and it will feel uncanny and false. you want to sketch out the feel of a conversation, just the tip of it.
Thought about Victoria anon in the shower today. Typing about Victoria anon in the Victoria thread.
Is starting sentences with "And..." exceptionally hard to read? Or just unpleasant?
Here’s hoping nobody here wastes their new year writing genre slop. Keep the crap about elves and warp drives to the /wng/ crowd.
>>24986007I don't mind it but it's not something I would like to see over and over again.
>>24986007Neither, as long as it suits the flow. It works pretty well in Perfume
>>24986039Instead we write about cute princesses dancing in pretty dresses!
>>24985268I like it and I'm a real ass nigga.
>>24986099This but they're named Kizumi-chan and Meruberu-chan
>>24986099Acceptable so long as it’s in the context of thoroughly researched historical fiction.
>>24986007generally it's a mistake, but can read just fine as long as you're intentional about your use
>>24986135Shut the fuck up white boy
From each direction, one's vision is blocked. Grasses and reeds grow higher then your head, with a crisscrossing of wet ditches and dry pathways make a maze underfoot. The buzzing of insects; only barely quieted during the night; can be heard in all directions and every level of the food-chain. The air is fresh and thick with floral smells, so damp and heavy one practically gulps it. Cresting the darkened hillside topped with long stamped down grasses can one finally see signs of civilization; many squat Wattle-and-daub long houses lay in long rows with white smoke slowly worming its way through the thatched roofs. Lights from the doorways point in different directions from each abode, as though trying to grant each other privacy. There are no chimneys or stone walls; the simple huts rise as though from the earth itself. It is night and today's work is done. All the people should have come home. Iron-headed tools are propped up against the plaster walls in a bit of lazy organization before the night's rest. With all inhabitants of the village human; as best you can guess; the cooking and warming fire would be essential. For this reason, the bawdy songs coming from the biggest houses are less curious to you then the hut with no light shining from its darkened portal at all.>Excerpt of a protagonist stumbling across a fantasy village at night, focusing on descriptive text and purple prose. Is this evocative?
>>24986225You need to work on varying sentence structure and length.
I did another screenwriting exercise. This is probably the best one I've done so far. I even named one of the characters Victoria. Maybe that's the trick.https://pastebin.com/M0V4DtPT
>>24986279>VICTORIA,stopped reading there
>>24986279>Victoria >30 years oldNobody wants to read a story about a hag. Make her 25 at the oldest
>>24986306What did you think of the prompt?>>24986345Thanks, I'll use that feedback for next time
>crtl + f "v*Victoria">8 results>31 repliesFellers isn't it about time to find another shitty forced meme to beat to death for months
>>249849432026 will be the year of girlcoreCute and Dignified is inGross and Bitchy is outHope wins in the end
Cozy place for polite writers and story lovers:https://discord.gg /h4WJKJWT
Is Victoria this thread's greatest success?
>>24986405In all honesty, it's one of the better written works and the manuscript is completed
meant >>24986371 for >>24986099I do think that "genre" serves as a Rorschach test for corruption of the soulJust look how many people desperately pervert and subvert those classic tales about genuine beauty and innocence as if they're uncovering the "true" motive of the author
That noble spider come crawling down the steps of gold-ivory-gold-ivory, its legs go click and clack and all the hubbub fade away until only the song is heard, only the clack clack clack and wail of a righteous spider. In its hands, a tarp and the hint of many lumps. Eight eyes which see in all directions crown its head and eight mouths which speak in all tongues speak easy until every party goer from the Great High Pattern-Duke of LaStrandt to the lowliest Servitor Ape stands awed, cooed to by their mother tongues, coaxed into the spectacle of gift giving. Click clack goes the spider, and the tarp is drawn aside.Rotating, pirouetting. First one, then the other, the rest join in, all the baubles great and small are revealed. The Giver of Presents dances, imagine that. Dancing spiders! Round and round they go, the many planets which are actually spheres of glass. The worlds which are actually relics and wouldn’t you know it, Lady L. L. L. was right, relics really do catch the light. Chandeliers cast down their light, rays wink here or there among the baubles. The seduction of guests, the glitter of gold. And inside the first sphere is a bloody heart.“This her passion, the Victoria.” The spider hands it away, is almost sorry to see it go. The Lady L. L. L. takes it, feels her heart quicken. “This her strength, the Victoria.” Tendons. “This her embrace, the Victoria.” Nine fingers, they never did find that damned thumb. “This her vision.” “This her kiss.” “This her last gasp.” “The Victoria.” “The Victoria.”Servitor Apes a-howling and the Great High Pattern-Duke is drawn in, his antennae twitch, his moth-eyes aglow. Many eyes are upon him. He takes the bauble which is the biggest of its kind and indeed the crown jewel of that spectacle, of that party where ten thousand spiders labored to gather the pieces of her, the remains big and small, ingredients of a kind, infinitely reusable, aesthetically pleasing to some, mere status to others. It was given freely: Her, the holy her, and the Pattern-Duke looked into her sockets. Into the face sans lips, sans nose, sans eyes. It would be rude not to accept.“This her personality. The Victoria!” When the dancing host raised its empty arms there came a great cheer from all corners of the Dicing Palace and worlds far and near, those who watched through spider eyes.In the interest of good relations, the Pattern-Duke roared with laughter.“Hallelujah!” He joked, and that made for a good quote.
>>24986358>What did you think of the prompt?Felt like a dumb idea for a dull, pesud indie film with no budget
>>24986577Thanks, that means it's working
>>2498496429,000 now. Fuck I'm good.
How many pen names do you have? Do you post to more than one? Are you embarrassed by your old pen name(s)?
>>24986656Anyone can write 30k words of absolute horse shit
>>24986670I mostly get good feedback anon, and I'm more confident with this novel than my others.
>>24986689Oh Chat GBD gave you a 6.5 did it?
