Previous: >>24984921/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQRESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvCPlease limit excerpts to one post.Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.(And maybe double-space your WIPs to allow edits if you want 'em.)Simple guides on writing:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRM [Embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9s [Embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk [Embed]
looking for advice on my excerpt
>>24999072What's with people posting work and having a clear spelling/grammar/punctuation error in the very first sentence?
>>24999100>clear spelling/grammar/punctuation error in the very first sentence?Which is?
you need coins to launder money
>>24999103Go ask your english teacher lmao. I at least hoped you would insist it was deliberate and done for stylistic effect.
>>24999112you're going to have to bait harder than that
>>24999114You can argue the mistake is stylistic but by strict grammar rules it is still a mistake.Stylistically speaking it looks wrong too.I'll give you a hint: google what makes a grammatically complete sentence
>Victoria: Eternal Seether of Rome>Victoria: Queen of Jeets>Victoria: Mecha Pilot Master>Victoria: The First Red Ranger>Victoria: The Dragon and the Rings of Power>Victoria: Ass Assassin and the Violent Semen InfernoHow many Victoria stories do we have?
>>24999119>Stylistically speaking it looks wrong too.No it doesn't. What you propose would look and sound worse. Say it out loud.This is your last (you).
Once again, anon posts an excerpt and shits his pants at the slightest critiqueNever change /wg/
vague substanceless bitching about grammar isn't critique
>>24999128So you really don't know what the issue is, because one fix wouldn't even require changing how you speak the sentence aloudI'll just say it: it should be a comma and not a semicolon. The second line is a sentence fragment>The noose knotted by his own hand only now visible as the world below him receded into fog.This is not a sentence. Each side of the semi colon should be a complete sentence.A comma is perfectly functional there and you used a semicolon because you don't know the rules of the language you're writing in and thought it sounded fancy.Unacceptable.>>24999140To be fair, my original post wasn't critique, I was asking why 90% of critique requests have obvious errors in the first line. It's baffling and disappointing.And more importantly, it poisons a reader's expectations going forward. If you step onto stage and stutter on the first word of your speech, you've shot yourself in the foot perception-wise. Much more so than if you made a mistake several minutes later.
>>24999072>The strangling cord of fate tightened around Lord Brennock's neck; the noose knotted by his own hand only now visible as the world below him receded into fog.All cringe aside, and it's a lot, that doesn't make sense. If you're hanging from a noose, you can't see the knot. It's behind your head. >Yet,Adds nothing. Delete every word in your story that doesn't add anything to it. That's most of it.>fog>fogStop.>He stood at the parapetHe just killed himself. >...There are few instances where this is acceptable. This is not one of them. If you want to create distance, add a dialogue tag.>>24999114He's correct. A semi-colon is used to connect two independent clauses. You don't have two independent clauses in that sentence. The second part of your sentence is an absolute phrase, not an independent clause. To be an independent clause, it needs an adverb like "was". "the noose knotted by his own hand WAS only now visible as the world below him receded into fog." Semi-colons are sometimes used to connect an independent clause and an absolute phrase for dramatic effect. It's still technically incorrect, and it's not a stylistic choice if you don't know if you're violating a rule or what rule you're violating. If you delete all of the bullshit fluff in that sentence, you won't have that problem. it will just be a single clause. >"The cord tightened around Lord Brennock's neck as the world below receded."Everything else you added to that sentence, fully 58% of it, was bullshit.
>>24999153I don’t like “was”, it doesn’t read right to me. “Made” is closer, but I still don’t like it. Either way, I didn’t post this so anons could bitch about grammar. Nitpicking line edits are not particularly helpful.Maybe it’s not clear, but it’s a metaphor, not a real noose. And, to be fair, the noose is what is visible. “Knotted” is just how it was made.
Hello, posting an excerpt right before I leave on a 3-month journey. It's the beginning of Chapter 14 on my story, so don't be alarmed - every single proper noun has already been mentioned once other than the ones I left blank on purpose.Critique away (1k words).https://medium.com/@panosfrag/chapter-xiv-excerpt-1871587582b1
>>24999171It’s shit sorry
>>24999165>Either way, I didn’t post this so anons could bitch about grammar.People don't want to help newbie authors who are still fumbling around with language.Very simple solution: post an excerpt without obvious objective errors. Any non-beginner could manage that with a single proofread pass.
>>24999165>I don’t like “was”, it doesn’t read right to meI agree. I don't like the whole sentence, though.>I didn’t post this so anons could bitch about grammar.I don't care why you posted it. You did post it, and you get whatever you get. Anon corrected you. I wasn't nitpicking you, I was pointing out that he was right after you argued with him about it for several posts instead of just googling it. >Maybe it’s not clear, but it’s a metaphor,It was clear to me that it was trying to be a metaphor. It's not clear that it is a metaphor. >And, to be fair, the noose is what is visible.Woah, easy with the nitpicking. No part of the noose is visible when you're hanging from it.
>>24999072This is terrible. It took me a long time to realize what you're setting up. Nobody gives a shit about >for thirty years...unraveled at once.It doesn't do anything for the plot except give us a "As you know, Bob exposition dump." The more I read it, the more I would delete the first paragraph altogether. I would just write>Lord Brennock stood at the parapet. Not a single one of his messages returned. He sent riders three weeks ago, birds two weeks ago, and last week opened the clan's vault and used the scrying stones.>some shit about his emotional wellbeingThen I can't continue because I don't know what the plot is. Which is the biggest problem. What exactly is the plot. Tell us something. Is it another army? The fog is a disease? A monster? I'm assuming it's an opposing kingdom. If so, state it already.
>>24999182>>24999183You are free to nitpick whatever grammar errors you like. It’s just that bitching is not helpful criticism.
>>24999189sure it is. Grammar is very important because it gives the reader CLARITY. Without it, your story falls flat on its face.
>>24999189>It’s just that bitching is not helpful criticism.If you can't tell by>People don't want to help newbie authors who are still fumbling around with language.I don't want to help you. I want you to learn the basics before asking for help, especially if you're going to have an attitude when your objective error is pointed out.
>>24999190>>24999191Of course you don’t want to help. You would rather cry about grammar. Which is fine, but it’s not helpful criticism.
>>24999189I'm not nitpicking anything, I'm pointing out major structural issues and settling the dispute. YOU are bitching about a single grammar correction that's now turned into 20 posts.
>>24999198>Which is fine, but it’s not helpful criticism.How many times are you going to bleat this at me as if I care?
He didn't say ten negative things for the rest of his life. The pain was faster than life. Is this curbing? Is this dusk? Or some other dream, a neanderthal clambering?
Tilde or asterisk for a scene break?
>>24999171>>24999100Is it that hard to proofread? Dropped.
>>24999253Just a line
>>24999257horizontal lines don't exist in lots of softwareare you saying a bunch of dashes to mimic one?
>>24999072Nothing of value has even come from this thread. The very fact that you post here means that you are ngmi. Further advice is pointless.
Victoria anon. Give me the next chapters you piece of shit. I'm invested after reading your first 10 chapters. What happens you piece of shit?Thoughts>Story takes a while to get going. It's predictable, but it's well executed. >I do like Victoria more and more. She's a bitch in the beginning, but her tsundere attitude towards Harold makes her a bit endearing.>I love the subtle changes in Victoria's character.>I love the Norse and Christian themes. It flipflops back and forth a lot with a lot of Christianity being tied to Norse holidays, manners, and cultures. I also like it's accessible without being overwhelming with tons of expositions and stupid nonsense that tons of writers insist in inserting.What I don't like:>Victoria being a latin name does irritate me, I do understand it being used as a "readability" standpoint and it is addressed but sometimes it takes me out when I see her name next to shit like "Erik, Ingrid, Bjorn." >Marcellus needs a name change. It's too Latin for a guy that's supposed to hate the "Christian intrusion". You need to give him a very slavic name. Keeping with the "God of War" theme, call him Svantovit (which you'll have to change Svenald) or some shit close to it. >You underwrite. We need more emotional beats to the story. Show us more of Victoria's seething or random thoughts of what she's doing. For example the vendor scene.>I better not see her lead an army to charge into battle and defeat Marcellus 1v1. in some crazy Girlboss shit. There are some other things that needs a professional editors touch, but I cannot do it. It feels off to me, but I can't exactly pinpoint or say why. Like pacing and some paragraphs needing to be rearranged or in another chapter.
>>24999253Reddit spacing will suffice
>>24999287b-but I only have one serviceable chapter ready...
I delete my writing once I’m done with it.
>>24999315If only everyone in /wg/ did the same...
>>24999315I have gigs of short stories rotting away on my hard drivenobody has and ever will read a word of them
I do not understand paragraph spacing. Let's say the following where XX indicates an indent>Prose prose prose>XXCharacter one talks>XXCharacter two talks>Prose prose Is this right? Or should there be an indent after the second character speech? >XXProse prose
>>24999362Have you never opened a book before? Every new paragraph gets indented, except where a drop cap is used. Every new line of dialogue gets indented.
at least /wng/ is hopeful instead of bitter
>>24999425Then fuck off back there with your slop
>>24999482no
is there a guide or something that explains how to write for people with "programmer brains"?
>>24999498Just write.
>>24999498Maybe try screenwriting, it's more structured and everything but the dialog is basically just instructions. Though you still need to learn to write dialog.
https://files.catbox.moe/n59qaa.pdfHow bad us it?
>>24999611>pdfShan't!
Okay, attempt 2 at publishing this thing.
>>24999611It's monotonous masterpiece of borderline illegible, self-important, derivative, juvenile, pseudo-intellectual garbage. It's aggressively and offensively bad. A grotesque catalog of imagery that loses it's impact and collapses into self-parody almost instantly. It's like a showing someone a slide show of 500 unsorted pictures of your skin condition. It elicits no feelings but fatigue and embarrassment for you. Your prose is ultraviolet, a gangrenous festering bruise. Absolutely cumbersome. You pile adjective on top of adjective on top of adjective like vocabulary bukkake as if each one is an improvement instead of a detriment to clarity and momentum. You hide behind this act of literary obesity because you have nothing poignant or truly unsettling to say. It reads like a writing exercise where the only rule was to hunt through the thesaurus to find as many words as possible to obstruct the story you're actually trying to tell. You're like a brain damaged magpie compulsively screeching and shoving shiny awful trash into a nest. Right now it's not even a story. It's a bloated, masturbatory sketch, rotten to its core with self-indulgence. It's like you actually hate the idea of telling a story. There's no tension, no escalation, no plot, no rhythm, no cadence. It's just a random parade of "and here's another disgusting thing that happened." It's like a child trying to come up with the most horrible thing ever. "a-and it smelled like poop and it was super ancient and it had a thousand eyes.", like smearing shit on a wall and calling it a manifesto on decay. It's deeply lazy and fundamentally unserious and entirely forgettable. A sweaty, talentless pantomime of Lovecraft, a parasite of Cronenberg, a fanfiction with zero understanding of what made them effective or the themes they conveyed. It's a monument to editorial failure that betrays a fear of blank space and silence. It's profoundly disdainful and disrespectful of the reader's time, intelligence, attention and senses. The only thing cosmic about it is the scale of its failure and the only dark future here is the one where anyone has to read another sentence of this drivel.
>>24999611We told you what was wrong with your first page in the last thread and you still didn't change it.>>24999686this guy's insult is far more interesting than your book and made me check your pdf.
More nonsensehttps://iannewman.blogspot.com/2026/01/breaking-and-entering.html?m=1Pretty deep into an inside joke now.
What do you anons think of this? Does it flow well?"The rain lashed against the grimy cobblestone streets and old stone buildings of a sprawling city that was all too familiar with degeneracy. A maze, it was; a tangle of houses big and small, inns and brothels and stables and markets. Among it ran rats, some fuzzy and small, pitter-pattering on four little paws, whilst others walked on two legs and wore not fur but torn cloaks and ripped tunics. Some wore chainmail and steel plate, upon a few of which was the sigil of the city of Yharl - a pointed star the colour of blood.The rain pelted the streets on a dark night as these folk went about their business of fighting, drinking, whoring, drinking, gambling and more drinking. The night was young, and a sea of stars shone above. Among these stars was one in particular that stood out from its countless cousins; a large star the colour of spilled blood. It shone and winked in the icy vault of space, did this magnificent star, gazing at all below as a child may gaze down at a particularly interesting ant hill.It was a cloudless night, and the moon shone like a brilliant silver coin, reflected in the countless puddles that littered the dirty streets. In one narrow, twisting alley that stank of stale urine and some poor fool’s rejected dinner, strode a tall man draped in a cloak as black as the skies above. His leather boots clacked and splashed against the wet cobblestone, the sound ringing throughout the deserted alleyway as the wind whistled through so many cracks and crags within the stone.From elsewhere he could hear the yells and laughter of the townsfolk as they went about their nightly pleasures. These folk, no doubt deep into their cups despite the young hour, would have certainly sobered up enough momentarily at the sight of the tall man so that they would have given him a wide berth if they were to cross on the street.His cloak was pulled tightly about him, making it all too easy for weapons to be concealed beneath. In Yharl, it was best not to take chances with folk one would deem strange. Most folk in the city wore whatever weapons they carried upon their hip; clearly visible so as to deter any trouble before it even started.The tall man rounded a corner, a chill breeze stirring his brown hair, soggy and matted with rain.Brown and grey, he thought grimly. You’ll be an old man before long. Old, decrepit, with claw-like fingers scarcely capable of loading a pistol.A worrying thought, yet a silly one; he was still young enough to see his task to completion. There was still time. It is no good to dwell inside one’s own head, yet often we dwell there regardless, whether we like it or not."
I'm thinking about writing a story based on Counter-Strike
>>24999746Needs more adjectives if you want to ruin it completely.
>>24999611Is this better?
>>24999865No. I don't know how much more we have to scream at you, but learn to tell a goddamn story. Stop it with your pointless descriptions and word vomit. Ask yourself these questions before you write another piece of shit:Who is the main character?What does he want?How is he going to achieve it?THAT INFORMATION MUST ALL BE GIVEN TO US IN THE FIRST SENTENCE!
>>24999884You too, fucking retards>>24999746>>24999072At least in the 3rd example we know who the main character is. >24999287This excerpt, which isn't the first paragraph or sentence of the story tells us way more information about the story than your word vomits.All that in one damn sentence that's not even the first sentence to the story.>Confused by Harold's concerns Victoria, miffed by his continued silence, found little patience with the prince's attitude.>Victoria is the main character>She wants to know why Harold has concerns>She stops caring about Harold's silenceIs that so hard?
>>24999865keep them seething, anon. this is beautiful.
>>24999041I fucking hate writing. How's this?
>>24999072this is perfectly mid you whiny sissieschrist this thread has become whiny
https://youtu.be/nn59j75Q1Mc?si=XbVGHtieaAK2zOOq
>>24999376Archive of our own and Google docs butcher the formatting away. Is there any way to keep it, apart from a .pdf?
>fantasy slophttps://pastebin.com/z3Pia6vYShit?
>>24999746You didn't change it enough, it's still too much AI
I just had an idea for a novel so exciting I actually started sweating. I need to get commit myself to reading the greatest works of literature twelve hours a day before outlining so I don't fuck it up.
>>25000280>he thinks reading will make him a good writerlmao
>>25000284I'm going to read and then write out the scenes that I find particularly beautiful to download their power into my fingers.
>>24999150Okay I have to ask, as a tool to control clarity and flow, does "correct" grammar even matter? I wouldn't have read or understood it any differently if he had used a comma instead. I often feel most grammatical rules are pointless for people with expert intuitions about writing. Basically just easy excuses for critics to be noisy cunts.
>>25000418>people with expert intuitions about writing.This is not one of those people.
>>25000142Yep.
>>25000418>does "correct" grammar even matterObjectively, no.
>>25000097Use word
What’s the best thing to do after you give up?
>>25000660Keep going anyway.
>>25000660Try again.
>>25000666Trips of truth
>>25000418Help jack off a horse.Help Jack off a horse.Does that convince you to use proper grammar?
>>25000660Honestly just quit. If you're already self-defeating there's no way you're going to be able to handle critique and rejection.
>>24999482
>>25000678Okay, but this I read and understood differently. My point wasn't "do anything you want" since I'm using grammar in all my sentences right now. My point was, an intuition about clarity and flow should supersede strict grammar rules for people with a solid understanding of how to communicate in English. What does it matter whether you used a semicolon or a colon if it had the same result? I feel this way about sentence fragments and comma splices too. They often have stylistic merit that doesn't impede clarity.
Okay bros my book is on sale. Even if it's shit, it's out there. I exist. I EXIST
>>25000532Reason
>>25000727>What does it matter whether you used a semicolon or a colon if it had the same result?They don't have the same results and are for different purposes. The cold air brought four things; chill, wind, snow, and sleet.>Chill, wind, snow, and sleet.It isn't a sentence and makes no sense. What does chill, wind, snow and sleet have to do with anything? >The cold air brought four things: chill, wind, snow, and sleet.Now we have a clear list of things. What did the cold wind bring? Those four things. Why must you argue about shit that has been constructed, thought about, and agreed upon, for the past 2000 years? Just learn to write properly. There's a reason why people made fun of Sandersons Stand. Kallen. DID.It's fucking retarded
>>25000744You wrote a bunch of bullshit and nothing really happened.
>>25000727They don't have that intuition.
An easier and more precise reason is simply: you're a retard.
>>25000780‘Bullshit’ isn’t a reason. Also, it’s a few hundred words, not a biblical anthology. No mention of prose, grammar, description, imagery, flow, other things you’re welcome to talk shit about. If it sucks it sucks, I don’t really care, but don’t give a ‘reason’ if you have no input of value to actually give.
Let's take this moron's excerpt >The undead dragon split its gory maw open, We know a dragon is opening it's mouth, but split is such a terrible word choice we think it's trying to break off it's bottom jaw.>tendons and sinew snapping apart as its jaw stretched horrifically wide.Which is further proven by the snapping of tendons and sinew. The fuck is happening? A dragon opens its mouth only for its jaw to fall off? It's retarded. >An unholy roar RIPPED through the land.I don't know what an unholy roar is (especially in this context, you don't have any world building or Christ/religion established yet) nor do I know how it's ripping anything. Yes, I know you retards it's yelling really loud, but if you read it, it doesn't read like that. Ripping involves tearing. What is being split apart? Nothing. That's why it's also retarded. >The earth quaked. The sky trembled. Neither can do such things. Too much video games for you. >The Gods themselves quivered atop their celestial thrones as the infernal sound made its blasphemy known to the natural order of the world.At least now we know there are gods. But this first paragraph already fails as a hook. Who is the main character?What does he want?How does he achieve it?You're not writing in the 1800's anymore. And even huge descriptions from Dickens or Steinbeck works because the setting is a character in of itself. Solanis Valley is something that needs to be dealt with.
>>25000837>the earth cannot quake
>>25000821I told you the reason, you just can't read. This is what happened in your few hundred words.>A dragon roared.>Another dragon fell from the sky.>The city was consumed.That's it. The rest is bullshit. Your writing is bullshit. You are bullshit.
Autists have are obsessed with grammar because they are unable to parse syntactic ambiguity.
>>25000844Not from a roar stupid especially since you established that it "split the land". Holy fuck do you understand logical sequencing? Is it being split or is it shaking around? But we know you're such a retard you can't write the extra sentence >A fissure emerged from the dragon's roar. The split caused the earth to shake. >>25000849No, retard. Grammar is important because it doesn't make you sound like a retard.
Why are all of you so jealous of /wng/?
>>25000837Most of what you said is invalid and false ‘nitpicking’ of word choice just for the sake of pretending you have something to actually say, which you clearly do not. >tendons and sinew snap because it’s undead. horror elements. though according to your logical genius, zombies aren’t allowed to rot anymore omegalul>can’t use the word unholy if I don’t have Christianity or religion established in the few hundred word excerpt. guess the English language is off limits too because I haven’t established how the ancient european cavemen flapped their ass cheeks together over thousands of years to evolve the modern lexicon>every word must be used to their LITERAL definition or its SHIT. Do NOT have any creative freedom.>wasn’t me who said it first but, earth can’t quake lol>Every first paragraph must abide by my 3 arbitrary rules or it’s SHIT!
>>25000889Because they're 10x more successful than we'll ever be. None of our excerpts can even match the quality of prose and plot of even the worst excerpt in wng.
>>25000908Holy shit do you even read? If an undead dragon has the sinew of his mouth snapping. It's falling off. God damn make it make sense retard. And yes every story must follow those three questions because you can't pull it off. Holy fuck you're another fucking retard. Go ahead and keep your shitty ass story as is then. It'll always be shit because you can't take a single criticism .And by all means how does a dragon shouting make a ground shake? God damn you're a retard.
>>25000918Whoaaa getting hostile there! I can tell you’re getting a little bit tense. I can take criticism just fine. In fact, I wasn’t even playing defense to begin with. I don’t care if I can’t pull it off, I write completely for fun. I was just pointing out that you STILL have little to no value to add and whatever you do say ends up being retarded and hilarious. >the earth cannot quake
>>25000938Not in the way you're describing. God damn you're a retard. Proof you cannot read either.
>I-I-I can t-take criticism >can't take criticism
>>25000947Go ahead shout at the ground like an autistic retard you are. The ground won't be shaking
I've come to the conclusion that the only thing prose is good at is explicitly portraying inner thoughts. In other words, it's for hacks and retards.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HInmEcbFyF0^ you could never capture this in writing
>>25000947>>25000950>>25000952>retard retard retardYou sure got me there with your diverse vocabulary and that image of a baby you have at the ready. I’m shook.
>>25000956SOVL HOLY PULL. Oh man, I remember roaming Fighting the vrykul for hours, even days. Then, finally, hearing those bagpipes the first time you get to the Grizzly Hills and seeing that wildlife has bloomed even in hell, and wondering if there was a chance in the end for good to prevail after all. >That big tree you could walk through, which had been bored out like a Crash Bandicoot levelFuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck bros... I miss it.
>>25000910At least your onest.
>>25000958What did we learn today? Clarity. There isn't another word that is as precise or as accurate to define you.
>>25000973Stop replying to yourself faggot
Do you make sure to use inclusive language in your writing?
>>25001045>twitter screenshot>blurry photo of a monitor>meme arrow outside of meme websitethe reddit trinity
>>25001045No I want to make sure women and fags know immediately that they're not welcome
>>25001045I'm sorry. What does "inclusive" mean. Sounds ike something that no one, writer or otherwise, ever had to worry about once. Well, until the whle democrat liberal thing got rolling. Ever since, "they" (whoever they are) change the "proper" terms to use for things, and they change regularly. So no, I don't write with "inclusive" as a primary objective. Now before you go and call me a CHUD!, you should know this. I often don't even say if the character in my book is white or black or anything else. I often don't describe the person in too great of detail, because I'm leaving the reader room to insert whoever they think belongs in the movie in their head while reading. "Inclusive" is a bunch of made up bullshit. WHo is anyone to tell people how they have to speak, now you'll tell us how to write? Fuck off.
>>25000753Okay, except I understood both your examples equally well. So how can you say one made no sense? In this case grammar rules served no purpose in regards to clarity.
>>25001105>What does "inclusive" meanHostile to men particularly of the straight white variety
>>24999072I've concluded that no good can come from this, anon.Your responses will come in a handful of options, none of which include anything approaching genuine help or useful critique.Instead, you shall receive:1) Snarky comments. Probably far more cruel than they should be, and definitely not useful.These never come from anyone who has published something or been published.Not even sure why those guys are here, desu.2) Smug comments. Someone who thinks he is today's Tolstoy will tell you what an awful job you did. He will not elaborate. He will not offer correction.I recently self-published a book. No sales, but hey, I just did it today. I did it by sitting down, writing until the story was told, editing the punctuation and spelling, and then publishing it myself when I realized that getting a literary agent and going the traditional route was pointless.No, I won't post a link. Why the hell WOULD I? This group is a crab bucket. My advice? Sit down, write from the heart, and never come here again.
>>25001173you're not reading correctly. It makes sense in your writer's head and when you "sound" it out. But it makes not sense literary and "reading" it out.Reader's clarity > Writer's vision
>>25001239you're supposed to improve your writing, not write your gobbly goop jeet nonsense.
>>25001243I am sorry, saar.I will do the needful changes to make the improvements... nah.Fuck you.
>>25001285then continue to be shit retard
Publishing houses. Prestigious boutique ones. Any suggestions?
Man, I really want to write a heist book. I feel like we haven't had one in a while. Any tips or structural ideas for such a thing?
Get me published by Penguin Random House. What's the move?
>>25001777Are you an "underrepresented voice"?
>Half the thread is a melty about commas and semicolonsNever change /wg/
>>25001777If you have to ask, it will unironically never happen.
>>25002004>the other half is you being a faggot outside of your containment thread
>>24999976Hey, it's "The Hymnal Of Tomcat Rot"! I remember this story. I thought it was really good!
>>25000097AO3 allows you to upload .css stylesheets, then you just have to export to an HTML format that uses that stylesheet. Google Docs allows you to upload your .odt or .docx file and it preserves the formatting. So what are you complaining about?
>>25000418Does this answer your question?
>>25000660Get a day job.
>>25002042The dude larping as a /wng/er and blatantly trolling responses is obviously the same /wg/ fag that's infested /wg/ for years.
>>25001618Honestly you just gotta focus on the crew and the plan. Act 1 starts with the leader taking on the job, and how the job is basically suicide, then spend the rest of Act 1 getting the team together. everyone needs a specific job or it gets messy. Most the fun is watching them prep and then seeing it all fall apart the second they walk in the door. if things go perfect its boring. you need stuff to go wrong so they have to wing it.keep the clock ticking too. if they got all day to think then there is no pressure. also maybe give the main guy a reason to be there that isn't just cash. if he is doing it for revenge or something it hits way harder. but you can't make it too cliched, try to think of some original spin or twist on the job or why the main character is doing. just dont make the ending feel cheap. it is gotta be smart but not like impossible smart.
>>25001618Group of naked sexy women with their own skills of seduction from sweet & loving to cruel and dominant
>>25002084just more thoughts on this, honestly you could try a heist where the team is actually breaking in to leave something behind instead of taking it. Maybe they have to plant evidence to frame a bad guy or put back a stolen item before anyone notices it went missing. it flips the whole genre on its head because they have to be even more careful not to leave a trace. another spin is having the crew realize halfway through that they are being robbed by a second team at the same time. it turns into a race to see who can get out first while they both try to dodge the guards.You could also do a story where the main character is the only person who thinks they are on a heist. the rest of the team might be actors or people playing a prank and the stakes only become real when a real crime starts happening around them. Or maybe the vault they spend the whole book trying to open is actually empty and the real prize was something they already walked past in the lobby. it makes the ending feel like a punch in the gut but in a good way.
>>25000418
>>25002093So, the "Blackmail" mission of the video game Thief 2?
>>25002143Omitting the oxford comma is not a grammar error.
https://rentry.co/v7qau7kwGot a comfy little excerpt for you guys if you fancy reading. It's probably not your genre, but here it is. It's actually part of a completed book, but now I'm going back through for a second read.
>>25002153Every single major publishing house disagrees with you and will insist on fixing the grammar error
>>25002093>a heist where the team is actually breaking in to leave something behind instead of taking it.I really like this idea, actually. Although there is something to be said for making it out with a big bag of swag. >You could also do a story where the main character is the only person who thinks they are on a heist. This could be a good idea too, although it isn't right for my story... Unless it is. I need to think about this. Thank you for the help, useful-anon. I'm going to get to work on it tomorrow, then.
>>25002167And? Newspapers won’t.
>>25002143i hate anti oxford comma people so much
>>25002175What's a newspaper?
>>25002175I didn't realize your aspirations in writing were the educational equivalent of qualifying for a rural ohio community collegeKeep on, then
>>25002188How many major publishing houses have bought your books again?
>>25002213Same number as you.
>>25002213Why would that matter? The point is that major publishing houses disagree with you. Your attempt to insult another anon proves you have no argument
>>25002236>The point is that major publishing houses disagree with youWhy should I care what they think? Are they the almighty gods of the English language? Will they smite me if I don't use the oxford comma?
>>25002261Why not start with that then? Why wiggle around with two different pathetic arguments >>25002175 >>25002213 before landing on "a-a-actually, I don't care!"?Pathetic
>>25002280It's the same argument, retard. Appealing to an authority that has literally nothing to do with anyone in this thread is super retarded. Why the fuck does it matter what publishers think? Why value them over, for example, newspapers? If neither you nor I are getting published, what relevance do publishers have over literally anyone else? Of course, I guess it's my fault for assuming you could connect dots or paint inside the lines. Next time, I will spoonfeed you so you can understand.
>>25002288>If neither you nor I are getting publishedspeak for yourself. I plan to get published traditionally one day. It's a shame zoomers set their bar so low.I blame their lack of watching Pokemon Season 1.>I want to be the very best.
>>25002294>It's a shame zoomers set their bar so low.It's 100% a good thing the world needs exactly zero zoomerslop
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4OQo5BXCVAlisten to the master
>>25002288Spoonfeed me more. Where does another anon being published or not fit into this argument? You appealed to authority with that while explicitly, now, saying that authority doesn't matter.You're just making me feel kinda bad for you. I'm obviously arguing with a 90iq who thinks he's 130iq
>>25002303I will try to make it even easier for you.>How many major publishing houses have bought your books again?noun: rhetorical question; plural noun: rhetorical questionsa question asked in order to create a dramatic effect or to make a point rather than to get an answer.This rhetorical question was asked to point out that nobody in this thread is getting published.>Why the fuck does it matter what publishers think? Why value them over, for example, newspapers? If neither you nor I are getting published, what relevance do publishers have over literally anyone else?In other words, if nobody here is getting published, what is the relevance of a publisher's grammar standards?These rhetorical questions were asked to point out that the rules of an organization that do not apply to any of us are irrelevant, and that invoking them is an appeal to authority. Like saying that you shouldn't do something because it is illegal in France, when we live in England where it is perfectly legal.
>>25002322>In other words, if nobody here is getting published, what is the relevance of a publisher's grammar standards?Only you are pathetic enough to want to qualify for a rural newspaper but not publishing houses.
Thanks to the anons who recommended me some books on writing in the last thread. I ordered like $150 in books, but I'll get reimbursed so it's all good I guess.
>>25002493nice, which books did you get?
>>25002523Who asked, creep?
>>25002055>>25002143My point keeps being misunderstood.In cases where the Oxford comma is useful for providing clarity, I agree you should use it. What I'm saying is, you shouldn't obey grammatical rules, but rather your own intuition about what sounds good and provides clarity, which will often lead you to obeying grammatical rules, and sometimes not. Or put another way, if following a grammatical rule reduced clarity, or worsened the rhythm, flow, or character of the writing without improving clarity, I don't think someone should follow it anyway. In that case, the rules aren't really important so much as intuition about clarity and flow, which happen to align with rules in most cases. I find this mainly true about sentence fragments and comma splices, which often work fine in context and don't really confuse. But if they didn't work in the particular context, I would say not to use them there just as easily.
>>24999041I wanted to skip the whole description of a character partying and tried to write it from the perspective they're in bed the next day reeling for it. Am I taking too long to establish this? Is it dragging? What would you cut down?
>>24999072I see what you're going for. It's not for me but at least there's that.
>>25000729Same! If you post the title I might read it at some point
Fuck, I'm having trouble thinking of the right word, and I'm unable to properly explain it either. Something kinda close to>caveat, equivocation, reservation, exceptionLike you write an article criticizing X thing but you soften it up with Y word... AHHHH it's on the tip of my tongue, fuck
>>25002992This is one of those cases where "write what you know" is actually good advice.
>>25002604Go through and highlight every sentence that furthers the plot and report back.
>>25002992Just make one up
>>25002992does it start with a q?
>>25003046It's not 'qualms,' no. thanks tho
Legal question:I wanted to write a story kind of tracking a fan as he experiences Halo 1 through 3, ODST and Reach, and then how he falls out of love with 343 and so on. My question is about the legal qualms with a story like that. Might they just sue me? I remember a comedy movie kind of doing something similar with Star Wars, but I'm not sure. What do you guys think?
>>25003046>>25003049actually on second thought, 'qualifications/qualify' is pretty close to what I'm thinking of. I'm not sure if it's exactly what I had in mind, but it works, thanks
How come no writer has ever written a kangaroo court scene where the judge bangs the gavel and screams, "Ordeur! Ordeur in the court!" and then they bring in a bunch of doo-doo feces?
>>25003054You will be sued arrested convicted prison-raped and executed. Not for writing that story but for asking 4chan for earnest legal advice
>>25003066Sadly, you're all I've got, anon sama... I love you
>>25003075Sometimes you're better off with nothing
>>25003085Okay, well, I'm going to quickly blast out a chapter 1 and post it for giggles anyway
>>25003054That's fair use. Don't defame anyone, don't imply endorsement.
>>25003005>>25003041>>25002992>>25003062qualify this!*unzips dick*
Do you anons journal or do freewriting? Does it actually help your creative writing skills?I started journaling daily a little over a year ago on little pocket notebooks I carry with me all day. Lately jewtube has been feeding me content about writing essays and doing freewriting as a way to train one's skills. I decided to give this a go and have been doing 10-minute freewrites daily for a week now but honestly I don't really see how this could be beneficial, am I just retarded or am I doing it wrong? Pic unrel
>>25003112No. That's pretty gay and counterproductive. Best practice is the Irish Catholic method. Bottle everything up inside and never, ever let it out, unless you're writing a book.
>>25002523I don't want to doxx myself, since I have to submit the receipt to get reimbursed, and one of you might be the people who checks receipts.But it was mostly replies to this post: >>24990256
>>25002165Sorry, was this just kind of boring? Not the right genre? I see that a few people opened it and then didn't continue. If you could tell me where it went wrong, then I could change it. Thanks.
>Over 50 query rejections>Not a single request for the full manuscriptWhen is it time to throw the towel? And what do I do with my novel? Try Amazon self publishing?
>>25003206put that novel aside and write another oneeven most highly successful authors did not get published on their first novel
>>25003206Post the first page here. I bet we can tell you why it's shit
>>25003171Your opening is garbage. Don't use 2nd person. If you're writing in a first person narrative, get us inside the kids head. Do what books do great at: emotions and inner psychology. You're also writing like a movie with all that narration like>I guess you're wondering how I got here.No faggots I'm not. I highly suggest you read psychology books to really get your character's voice and mannerisms
>>25003233Okay, I disagree with you about the 2nd person thing, but I think it might be too expositional. I could do with shortening it a little, perhaps.
