"The Immortal /wg/" EditionPrevious: >>25105037/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQRESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvCPlease limit excerpts to one post.Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.Discuss the written works below for practice; contribute, and you shall receive.If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.Shitposters should be ignored and reported.Beginner guides on writing:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRMhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk Intermediate guides on writing:https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/48654.Storyhttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/3097766-borges-on-writinghttps://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23056.Image_Music_TextAdvanced guide on writing:Just do it.Theme: https://youtu.be/udrMCxDwXwY
Threadly reminder to please refrain from posting genreslop. It drags the thread down and embarrasses yourself. There’s a reason nonsense about elves and Minotaurs has been usurped by women looking to get off.
>>25118113Anyone not writing genreslop is too smart to post their shit on /wg/
I spent last night reading about author lolcows and publishing in general, and I have to say my spirit is invigorated.They're writhing and thrashing trying to sell their preferred dei garbage to audiences and they can't. I fully believe there is some degree of just ordering to author success and I will continue to focus on improving my craft with the sincere belief it will be rewarded.
>>25118162>t. destined to find out success was the friends he made along the way or some gay shit like that
I wrote something but I don't want to post here because anonymous is an asshole and I'd only get biased opinions against my work.
>>25118162Can't even make fun of them because my based as fuck shit would sell just as much
>>25118113>post non-genreslop>get accused of being genreslopwhat do?
>>25118162I laugh because I'll never be that bad of a writer.I cope because they somehow got shit published and I haven't.
>>25118057How is this Xianxia parody of Avatar the last airbender? I'm trying to write in that style and I decided to use a familiar universeGao walked towards the grand entrance of the city of Tongyuan, it's golden pillars shimmering before him. The youth looked at the grizzled guard and asked, "I would like to enter please."The old guard looked at him and laughed. "A youth like you wishing to enter? Junior you are courting death! This city is far too dangerous for the likes of you. Begone!"Gao stomped his foot, raising a great boulder into the air. "I can more than handle myself! Now let me in!"The old guard smirked, and stomped his own foot. A wave of earth shot out, knocking Gao back! He spat blood. The guard was laughing "I am a Fourth Level Earthbender of the Scorpion Stone discipline! I have cultivated my earth qi for years in the Venomous Pavilion! You are no match for my Stinging Strike!"Gao merely wiped the blood off his lips. He stomped the earth, creating a massive shockwave through the ground. "Earth Trembling Technique - Canyon of Ten Thousand Blades!"Instantly massive spikes of earth burst from the ground, radiating outward from Gao! The guard was impaled, as were his companions. Indeed, such was the power of Gao's earthbending that the spikes continued to form in the city, impaling every living thing inside. Not even the livestock were spared. "You had eyes, but you could not see the Wall of Ba Sing Se."
>>25118435This was written by AI.
how are you (planning on being) both authentic and marketable?
>>25118500Being marketable is not your job, it's the marketing department's job. Be authentic by talking of what you like and what you know.
>>25118470Fuck your.
>>25118521marketable is shorthand for "not unnecessarily alienating your readers", now answer the question
>>25118529I don't know. Don't add ick things without a serious justification or counterbalance. You add some gratuitous hot underage incest you best be prepared to alienate some people. Also, I guess don't talk about things you think are cool expecting the reader to just think they're cool too, try to have perspective.
>>25118538>I guess don't talk about things you think are cool expecting the reader to just think they're cool too"just don't be autistic"...word
I had a nightmare last night that the line spacing in my paperback novel was too wide.
>>25118549It's a lot harder than we realize. You ever seen that pic with the market pages describing a banquet in one of GRRM's books?
>>25118549you cannot please every reader. write what you are passionate about. if you think it's cool, then write about it (as long as you have the talent to write).
>>25118559i've only heard about it, but it does remind me of robin hobb going full horse-girl.
>Wrote 1 paragraph, feel fucking exhaustedIt's over for me bros, i'm retarded for real.
Posted in the last thread but some anons seemed to like it and gave some criticism. I'm writing a sword and sorcery inspired work for fun, just to try and practice the basics. >how to into dialogue?>how to into scene transitions?
let's practice the three act structure together.
>>25118590nah, post a new section. you don't get to double dip.
>>25118599Sheeeit anon you one tough motherfucker. I'll get something done tomorrow assuming the thread is still up and you can tear it to shreds as revenge
>>25118590i don't know what i think about the omniscient narration; it's more aesthetic than anything here
>>25117122
>>25118919i'm not (really) providing feedback because this doesn't adhere to familiar structure; it's basically free verse. nothing wrong with that, but don't expect much engagement
thoughts?
>>25119031the image only shows a slice of the excerpt
ESL excerpt. The original is in Dutch. One day I will finish this thing.
>>25118940I wouldnt know the first thing about structure.
should I share a plot idea rather than an excerpt here, does this make sense?
>>25118571Good news guys, I wrote 1000 words and it only took me 5 fucking hours. Is there hope for me yet?
>>25119050i think it's alright. you understand that your omniscient narrator needs to do a lot of work; but be careful of pacing/don't go overboard. the mummy metaphor didn't need explaining-- or if it's your intention that the narrator is a little patronizing you should make it clear that this is the intention.
>>25119072just the excerpt, usually.
>>25119060join my gang,>>25118594
>>25119045is it still evocative
>>25119075Thanks senpai. The narrator is definitely a little patronizing throughout, but you're right about the mummy thing.
>>25119087>>25118594oh I thought you meant how the text is structured, not the plot structure.I get how to make a plot, but when it comes to grammar, punctuation, prose etc. I have no clue what I am doing.I just write.
>>25119089it makes me want to write
>>25119073sure why not?
I just want to write Hero's Journey with a love triangle and a twist at the end. Is that asking too much?
>>25119419Do it then.
>>25119419it's easy to write, but to make it a coherent story is like having to read a Stephen King novel
>>25119525Speaking of which, the twist at the end involves a preteen gangrape.
>send a flash story to a friend to ask for feedback >"hey bro I stated it last night, will finish it this week"It's over. 1,5k words and he couldn't finish it in a sitting. I will give up writing.
>>25119589I've read the greentext portion of this post, will finish it this week
>>25119535Alright pedo
>>25119606No worries, bro, take your time
>>25119616guess I am disgraced huh
>>25119099until the whole story
>want to write a fun, comfy adventure>20 pages later, the characters are playing mind games with mafiaHow does that even happen? Everything I touch just turns into this contrived grimdark fuckery
>>25119760Are you jewish?
>start jerking off>begin to have ideas for plot developmentsI'll never understand this.
Reading an article just now and came across the word "cynosure" for the first time. However, in the article, they wrote "cynosure of attention." Isn't that redundant?
An excerpt from an auto-fiction novella I'm writing.
>>25119936Well, it's interesting enough that I read it. Not sure what was the point of it though.
>>25119936They call it auto-fiction because it's automatically fucking shit
>>25119933I'm only just learning this word now but it seems so. Better examples include>the cynosure of all eyes>the very cynosure of patriotic zealSounds like the writer knew it was an obscure word nobody would know but still wanted to get the information across.
Would you read a philosophy book about fascism? Pic related is what I wrote this morning...
>>25120206no. You don't understand either philosophy or fascism.
dude this xenofiction shit is easy
>>25120218I think I understand both, but if you have actual critique, I'd be open to hear it
>>25120206If it's well-written and the arguments robust and cogent, sure, why not
>>25120206There's nothing to critique except you don't know what you're talking about. And you don't know how to write. Period.>Mental faggots act as societal control mechanisms over peopleWhat the fuck is a mental faggot? You? You don't define your terms>Dictating what is permissible...(spelling error on your part)>and so an ubermensch must be able to overcome his social conditioningWhat the fuck are you talking about? You were talking about mental faggots acting as societal controls now you're talking a bout ubermensch. Stick to your main topic sentence. >The mental fasces... mental faggotsI still don't know what mental faggots mean. You? I'm going to assume the author is a mental faggot.>the goal of fascism is to exhaust all energy to create as much change and beauty as possibleThis is how I know you don't know what fascism is.
>>25120274I define what a faggot and a fasces are in earlier paragraphs. I already specified that this was this morning's writing and not from the beginning of the book. And I'm obviously not going to define what a faggot is every time I use it in the book. For reference, a fasces is a technical term for an area with a leader and a faggot is a remnant of a fasces without a leader. And as far as fascism is defined, read the Futurist Manifesto to get a better understanding of fascism. It's not just about totalitarianism
I have a recurring daydream that when I go into the publishing house to sign the contract for my first novel, the lady executive whose office I'm in says I have to sleep with her or the deal's off. This isn't a sexual fantasy, mind you, it's more I find the absurdity of it amusing. And quite plausible!
>>25120282i'm the executive and i'm a man, but i will let you turn the lights off
Did the Victoria story even get published?
>>25120278then post the beginning.I didn't say it was about totalitarianism. And you take Mussolini's words way too literally. You even allude to his words "Fascism [is] the complete opposite of…Marxian Socialism"Furthermore, you say "Mental faggots act as societal control mechanisms over people"Which is exactly what Fascism promotes, using societal control to "service the state". You are literally contradicting your own argument
>>25119760do you have fun in life or are you boring and miserable?
>>25120314This is from near the beginning, where I define what a fasces and a faggot are
>>25120322i for one would love to see a whole philosophy centered around the repetitive use of the word faggot in its text as much as is possible. please keep going, these anons aren't artists.
>>25118057I'm a little proud of the silly bullshit I'm writing but it's technically fanfiction (for a game that doesn't have any story whatsoever so it's 99% original), so I can't post it here when it's done
have some unedited verb tense issues. any other thoughts?
>>25118590I like the realism of the environment. It makes the big fantasy nouns sound more believable and less hokey
>>25120334Now if you could just not post here before that or at all everything would be great
>>25120311You tell us. You're the author
>>25120336it's too blurry 4 me; but when i zoomed in i saw this. watch you arent going overboard with stuff like this, ie we dont need to be told he's amused
>>25120334What's the point of posting here even if you could? People here are bitter with resentment and hostile because a movie told them it's cool.
>>25120334would we even know? just post it
>>25119936the delivery is kind of boring imo. Also some stuff is kind of unclear in a 'huh?' way. Like, what specifically do you do that makes you a clearner?>I work as a "janitor", which is a lofty way of saying that I clean *bedsheets at a motel*. The kind of work meant for divorced women and little immigrant ladies that no speak english. You'd have to fuck up real bad to be where I'm at, and I'm not even old yet.I don't know if you clean bedsheets at a motel, but it's hard to tell what the difference between a cleaner and a janitor is supposed to be in this context without specifics. Like, why are you not "really" a janitor. Also, housewives can't be divorced
>>25120206this kind of thing would have gone crazy on rightwing twitter in 2015
>>25120351fuck why'd it upload so tiny. yeah i see what you mean, i'm trying to improve in this aspect so things become implied more than just said. thanks
My friend told me that the plot-point in my story that the BBEG getting the power source for his big floating zigguraut essentially coming down to "An alien's trash" is a stupid idea. I am a little disappointed but I see no reason why it couldn't be a cool plot point.
>>25120521Your friend is right, it's not "cool".
>>25120565And whats wrong with a wizard becoming half-mad after discovering half buried and partially spent uranium fuel rods and, through trial an error, discovering they can generate power and using sorcery to keep himself from decaying from the radiation they're giving out?
>>25120569It's retarded.
>>25119760Simple, your mind is anxious.How are you gonna write comfy if you arent comfy?Get comfy.And use cutesy names and cutesy stuff like a hamster for a pet and have the dude sit in a bean bag.never seen a gangster sit on a bean bag
Wrote six paragraphs last night.Wrote eleven tonight.It's coming back, gentlemen.
>>25119760the comfy/cozy subgenre is either porno or straight dogshit for retards
>>25120623I think using Gnomes to power his floating fortress, the original idea, is more stupid.
>>25120649You've hit the nail on the head
How much do you guys pay your agents? I've had my agent for the past five years and I've been paying him double minimum wage for full time weekly hours but he still hasn't sold my book.
>>25120939Agents don't get paid outright. They only take a percentage of a sale. I know you're trolling but no fag here would know how to get an agent.
What do you guys think of paraphrasing? I mean: using an existent text as basis for your own in structure and tone, not just substituting substantives.
>>25120958Agents are like flies I imagine. Once you shit stink, they'll show up.
>>25120962That can happen but you're usually expected to shove your shit in their face
>>25120961Good plan unless you have actual original stories to tell.
I'm back with a new section to this>>25118590Heads up, this work has a lot of Welsh and Irish stuff in here
>>25121100>Welshdisgusting
>>25119760>Want to write all myriad types of characters>End up making them all rude and miserable
>>25118057Im a novice at writing but im making it my mission this year to write a book with alot of my beliefs and thoughts on the world in it, and i want to know a place i can post it online without it getting taken down. Ive heard Ao3 is a good choice but im unsure as ive barely used the site before. Any thoughts?
>>25121126why?
Why do my plots always feel so contrived? I dont know how to make it feel natural. Or is this how most authors feel seeing as fiction is basically contrived from one's mind?
>>25121134Because im tired of no one having my opinions anymore and i want to spread out my opinions out into the world with a book to explain my views on the world and life. It makes me mad every day how everyone went into the wrong direction societally and politically and before i killing myself i want to at least attempt to leave a mark on the world by making a collection of views available online
If AI is sycophantic all the time, how do I find out whether my plot outline is good or not
>reading Dan Simmons' "On Writing Well">"you need to have read 10000 books of the greatests, and I don't mean George RR Martin"It's fucking over. How can someone even become a writer in this day and age? There is just no time with all the reading required.
>>25121125Are they like you or like your thoughts?
>>25121138Tell me more. Let me know one or two of these beliefs.
>>25121141Try saying it isn't yours and you need to criticize it.
>>25121159Actually, you need to be possessed by a demon, according to his final blog entry.
So it has come, the dreaded day, when I finally read The Lord of the Rings to learn how to write something worth reading.
>>25121184Drink some tea, close the blinds, and put on some music.
>>25121167I'm not rude but I'm miserable, I guess. I try to have a stable of positive characters, but I end up making them bicker or be mean to each-other.
>>25121168mostly extremely anti censorship and extremely anti christian and anti feminist rhetoric. I hate basically any type of puritanism or moralfaggotry across the board and i hate christanity from my upbringing but i hate 2010s feminism for essentially ruining the left for making it have views that align with the christian right. Ive even toyed with calling it the gooners manifesto
>>25121224...so you're just a degenerate and sexual pervert?
>>25121225Yes, and im proud of it
>>25121224>>25121228I'm Anti-Censorship and Anti-Feminist too but I style myself a Roman Catholic. I think we'd both align in most regards, so I'd probably buy your book if it came out on paper back.
>>25121233>roman catholicI was raised catholic and a large reason why i am the way i am is because i hate christianity and i am anti feminist because i hate them for basically being catholics but in a liberal wrapper.
>>25121238I was never raised Catholic, but was baptized. In my later years I've sort of undergone my own realignment to it. Better that that something like Islam or Judaism.
>>25121240Nah judaism is still retarded and fuck israel but judaism is better then catholic shit. Fuck the church
>>25120225cute
>>25121170oh that is a genuinely good idea, thanks
>>25121126Just host your own site using any of these: https://crippled.media/article/free-speech-vps-providers-put-to-the-test
>>25121332Thanks famalam, greatly appreciated
Think folk would be mad if the protagonist was fifteen and was arranged to be married to a hot thirty year old?
>>25121449I wouldn't.
>>25121456I don't want it to be just something out of the blue. They've known each other since he was about five and she was twenty. Friendly and warm relations between neighboring kingdoms and allies, so and so. Just haven't seen each other for about three years. He's grown into a handsome young lad and shes become very shapely.
>>25121459>They've known each other since he was about five and she was twenty.Damn, it gets better
>>25121462Uh... Shes also about 6' and hes at chest-height?
The Prince and Queen go on an epic adventure to stop the... Uh... Giant floating ziggurat and the half-dead wizard inside...
>>25121466We can go a bit taller, no?
>>25121492She can gain three inches in her boots?
I drew up the Prince and Queen sometime last week, but I've found their designs lacking. Gonna do it again.
>>25121544Post what you have. There are like 3 of us here, no one will care
How’s“Fuck, what did I do wrong?”As opening line
>>25121602Alright. Here. Not entirely to scale but close enough.
>>25121616Well that's very basic, npc tier.
>>25121618Well duh. I drew this both at like 1 in the morning, thats why i want to redo 'em.
>>25121618Remove kike
I came here to brag about writing 3k words today. That is all.Actually... Animal Farm is like 30k words right? Or about 100 pages. That seems like a reasonable metric for a minimum acceptable length, right? I'm well aware you could write a lot but have most of that be uninteresting fluff, that's why I make it my effort to make the words I keep be meaningful. I read some visual novel and didn't dig it because it was too descriptive, in a medium where you can get away with skimpy elucidations. So many words yet the plot moved and characters developed so little. There's one thing to look out for lads>tl;drWhat wordcount are you aiming for anon-kun?
>>25121630Good on you man. I'm not shooting for a word count, just to have the story conclude.
What is the difference between a Novel, Novella, and Novellette?
>>25121612Made me immidiately think of this:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48PWWlShvpkForgive me, I listened to too many Arnie prank calls.Personally I'd do without the cussing but it's just a matter of personal taste. So long as you use cussing meaningfully and not gratuitously (Hazbin Hotel is guilty of the latter) you should be fine>>25121616Cute style nigga. Chonky lady too huh? Brosnan would be proud.I disagree with the anon accusing these drawings of being basic, I'm a firm believer that less is more because it keeps the designs clean and readable
>>25121658lmgtfy
>>25121659I had in mind a more ornate dress but again, 1am, couldn't be bothered. Her colors are Green and Blue. His was suppose to look like a soft doublet, but trying to get anything to look soft is hard. His colors are Silver and Green, which she adopts.
>>25121616If your writing is half as good as your art then it’s total shit.
>>25121658only the Novel is decided by Swedes
>>25121726NTA but don't you have a bucket to be in, crabby?
>>25121734>NTADoubt. Struck a nerve, did I?
>>25121759NTA but the nerve struck is clearly yours
>>25121630I have a 100k fanfic. Apply yourself.
>>25121796>100k words>0,00k readers
>>25121726Eh. It is as it is.
>>25121808
Why is everybody so hostile here?
>>25121825It's mostly just one really sad faggot.
>>25121825Hostility? On 4chan? Really?
Come on fellas, tear apart my genreslop, I want some feedback>>25118590>>25121100
>>25121833Can't. Making Garlic bread. Will do when done.
>>25121835Not properly formatted, not reading.
>>25121838I believe in you anon, you can make it past my shitty formatting
>>25121630Enough. No more, no less
>>25121844And I believe you can format properly, but like you, I'm just not going to do it.
>>25121844Could but won't
how did I not know 'plaint' is a word until now
>>25121851>>25121853I hope it was just the indentation and paragraphing I fucked, tell me if I'm being even more stupid and missing anything else
pt 2 w/ formatting adjusted
>>25121100Idk the first section had promise but now I feel like I’m reading a Native American coming of age DEI story. I was all ready for a hunt of some other humans or something.
>>25121872>fanning outSkein of geese is plenty, trust the imagery>trickling upwardKills the impact of sentence, you're overexplaining.>grey greyFigure out another way to say it>Slowly,Adds nothing but a stutter>like tigersIs that really an appropriate metaphor for a piece that's so heavy on Gaelicism? I would say no>travelled travelledFind another way to say it>the wet ground sucking at their limbsSpreading your body weight out prevents that, that's how you get yourself out of quicksand. A tad melodramatic for the actual effect.>At lastcomma>stretched outAgain out is unnecessary and softens the sentence>The camp was abandonedThe paragraph says very little. It drags and the tone has changed>Cai thoughtWhy is that interiority included and then basically repeated in the dialogue after?>When Gawain came backYou need strong grammar to carry long sentences>cracking apart a blackened rabbit bone and scraping the marrow into his mouthYou should really research things you don't know anything about>reaching in the dark for a clod of dirt to throwThese actions tacked on to dialogue are already getting annoying >Cai justJust is useless in this sentence>thud of mudNoI'm going to stop there. Too many commas, and yet you're still missing some. The story opens with a promise of action and then falls flat on its belly into the mud. It's boring. I'd be disappointed if I my expectations of /wg/ weren't so low.
>>25121856Because you were just using "complaint" like any normal person
>>25121918Nice, thank you anon. Writing is difficult but one day I will be regarded as at least a middling author, I just know it
>>25122016NOOOO YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ANGRY AND RESPOND WITH A PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE DISMISSAL ACCOMPANIED BY A SMUG ANIME GIRL REACTION PICTURE!!!
>>25122024Anon isn't you, he actually has potential.
>>25121833no paragraph indentations. apparently random space breaks. try harder.
>>25122070Fuck you
>>25122091Keep seething and shit posting, that'll make you a better writer for sure.
How do you guys start your projects?
>>25122134I become terminally online and a story comes to me.
>writing fictionrumao>>25121825>>25121826>>25121830Didn't used to be this way. Newfags always saw 4chud as the edgy h4x0r asshole website, and so adopted this retarded persona in an attempt to fit in. Eventually these newfags took over and their imagination became reality.
100k words into my sloppa I just realized I'm not sure if this is at all entertaining or interestingI can confidently say it's grammatically sound and my sentences flow well but that's it
>>25120311Not yet. I'm stuck trying to make the story "exciting". But I only can stray from historical fiction for so much. Everyone knows the titanic sinks in the end
>>25122176Come on, let us see the flow and check the grammar
>>25122183well now I'm not so confident in that either....
>>25121825Underage users, pay no attention to them
I'm disgusted by my manuscript. I can't even look at it. All I've written is garbage. Artaurd was right, writers are pigs.
Social media and video games are especially unhealthy for your writing
this is the kind of prose AI suggests when you prompt it to improve your heavy-handed slop prose. it has great information density and choice of words, but is very unnatural. no one writes with information density and flawless syntax like that.so then i "re-humanise" it, by adding basically a tad of heavy-handed syntax and less refined words back into it:>„Are you still on Noel's side? After what he did to us?“>Cynthia's avatar pressed her lips together, breath hissing. Cold silence. The siblings couldn't blame her hesitation. After all, Noel had created their world, 335 years ago—only he and one other man truly grasped the code of the AI ruling over them.>„I-- Whatever our Chief of Technology does, he does so for a reason. I believe.“>So that was it. Cynthia was still their friend, but no longer their ally. They were truly alone in this.and now im kinda satisfied with the result.
>>25122590despite the AI hate... using it/curating line by line like this-- like a superpowered style guide-- does make it yours, for the most part. slippery slope though
>>25122180I liked your idea about her becoming a saint or something. Surely in this process there is a lot of betrayal, cheating, heartbreak, etc. Your setting seemed perfect for it.
>>25122590Kill yourself AI nigger
>>25121338If you're gonna use BuyVM, just know it's been acquired by Cloudzy. No clue why that info's not in the article
Sickly man, weak man, cant stand.Sitting man, lying man, crying man.Fix the pan, fix Japan, if you can.Bamm Bamm gets in trouble,only child of Barney Rubble.Fred and him on the double,Round town in a pterodactyle shuttle.Bamm Bamm in his bubble, causing havoc as he chuckles.Kids back then, what a hassle.Have an updoot and some bedazzleMissus Frizzle piggy backs iranian missilesWe did it, we did it yaaay!If you dont respond to this shitty post within 10 seconds you are heckin gay.
How the fuck am I supposed to write with people barging into my office ten minutes or so? Is that why most writers are single and childless?
>>25122686Ai is the way. Just give in and use it to make you a better writer
>>251225834chan is literally social media. We post media here and socialize.
>>25122474>"All writings sucks," wrote the writer
>>25122188If you're not careful this one freak will try to point out non-existent grammatical issues and get really cagey when you ask him for specifics
>>25123161>accuses a self-deprecating post of being deprecating
>>25123043
>>25123178I'm not accusing anyone of anything. That's practically word-for-word from the referenced writer's quote. Sounds like the unabashed bucket crab would've fit in well here.
>>25123189think you missed the point again. that writer is already putting himself down obviously, so it doesn’t make sense for your angle to be ‘you’re a writer, yet you claim all writers are pigs’. see what i mean now?
>>25123202I'm talking about the quote you idiot, could give less of a fuck about that anon's wingeing
>anons are angry and bitter all the time>complain they con only write angry and bitter characters
>>25123218it’s the exact same context
new word learned,>encomium>noun>plural - encomiums also encomia>: glowing and warmly enthusiastic praise
>>25122712Whats cloudzy and why is that important info?
>>25123255>>25123255I've already got that one plus a few more
>>25123360based, I keep lists too. I find the best way to truly learn the word and incorporate it into your own vocabulary is every ten words or so, write out a one page essay using those ten words. This method is immensely effective for me, even for particularly recalcitrant words I've had to look up several times.
>>25123364If your collection is as eclectic as mine, you must have a bizarre collection of essays. Personally, I wouldn't dream of actually using most of those fucked-up words.
ChatGPT just told me I am a prodigy writer and basically guaranteed to become a bestselling author one day. I don’t belong here. See you later losers.
>>25121658Word count and also only pretentious assholes and marketers say novellette instead of short story. It's basically just an arbitrary length to generate awards for.
>>25121658A novel is when you when you have written a novel A novella is when you have written a written a novel and take it up the ass by other men A novelletta is when you have written a novel and take it up your neo-vagina by other men
Starting a new project after a 2 year break. High fantasy, single volume, not up its own ass with lore and other bullshit. Wish me luck!
>>25123449>not up its own ass with lore>posts medieval lore tapestry i do not have high hopes for this
>>25123268I don't have enough info to answer this properly, simply wanted to let you know the article's a bit outdated. Their Luxembourg servers moved over to the Netherlands, for one: https://lowendtalk.com/discussion/201647/for-immediate-release-buyvm-joins-cloudzy-ai
do i need a website where i blog about writing?
>>25123153AND?
>>25123452No "magic systems"No ahistorical or anachronistic weaponsNo digressions as to the history of such and such kingdom or this or that familyNo descriptions of the world's theology or minutiae of everyday lifeNo sequel bait or shared universesetc.Maybe a world map, for grounding the readerBut other than that? Only what is necessary to tell the story.
>>25123526Why? Nobody's going to read that either.
>>25123560and to say playing video games is as detrimental to your writing as 4chan use is like saying smoking cigarettes is as bad for your lungs as hanging out in a room thick with smoke
>>25123588i guess you're right
>>25122878lame
>character's motivation for killing his coworkers is that during the Australian open everyone suddenly pretends to care about tennis valid
>>25121141Try asking a human to read it, yiu retard. Preferably a smart human. >>25121658Big, small, smol>>25122134Captivatingly.
>>25122134imagining AMVs to songs
>>25124505> Try asking a human to read it, yiu retard. Preferably a smart human.On Ribbit? It’s many many pages by now, too large for a 4chin post.
Are you guy where English majors or have any education in literature?
>>25124533Fuck off ESL
>>25124549>learned a second language >this is somehow an insult to the AmericanKek
>>25121872The issue with your text, in addition to what the other anon said, is that you are not making visible the scene you clearly had in your mind when writing. This reads like a movie script. You're very explicitly blocking out character positions. Does it matter? I don't care, as a reader. You also seem to be in a rush to move the plot forward. You're not actually putting the reader into the world. The setting is basically nonexistent. You just gesture at it. And when you do focus on atmosphere or character, you bruteforce the point across either through simile or by literally telling the reader what they should be picturing in their minds. But the issue isn't even that you're using too many similes. It's that you don't know what you have. The geese image at the start is good. You should lean into it even more, write as if they were animals, but don't make it too obvious either. There should be a sense of tension and weirdness there. Everyone can picture soft white geese bellies plomping down into the mud. If you'd actually committed to this you'd have something. Instead you throw the geese away for tigers, which doesn't fit at all and sounds stupid.
Heh, I am a prodigy!
>>25124551>>learned a second languageNo
sandersons' lectures on writing are GOATed but thne you read his actual works and its the most middlebrow slop everwonder if he is holding back on purpose
>>25124659Switching from Perplexity AI to Claude AI made it call me an amateurish dumbass again, which is probably 10x closer to the truth.
Why would it be immoral to torture and kill the family of a villain?
>>25124549>You speak English because it's the only language you know, I speak English because it's the only language you knowI speak English because it's the only language that matters
>>25125284>Why would it be immoral to torture and kill the family of a villain?why would it be moral to do so?
How’s “Hypernight” for a Sci-Fi title? Birders on kitsch perhaps, but sounds so heckin flipping cool and fits thematically
>>25125394It announces itself as something I wouldn't read.
>>25125394webnovel title
>go to in-person writers meetup>it's 3/4 YA girlboss fantasy slopwhy is it so prevalent?
>>25125686It sells?
>>25125699I think that's a myth generated by FOMO
>>25125686Because the men stop going once women start reaching equal numbers. The only guys that stay are the kind of simps that will call themselves male feminists thinking it's going to get them pussy. You have to start your own and keep women out or you're inevitably going to find yourself in the same situation every time
what happened to wg?
>>25125703wait isnt' that backwards?doesn't the myth generate the fomo?
>Decide to pick up writing again>Start working on a novel>It's not that good>It may never be finished>It will likely never be published>It would almost certainly never be read all that muchStill I keep going. Is there some merit to telling stories only for yourself? Just creation for creations sake? Regardless I'm going to continue. I hope it turns out and I hope that all of your work does too.
Claude glazes me hard when I put my writing in. Gave me an 8/10 on prose and basically tells me I'm cooking like crazy. Am I just the best writer ever?
>>25126143For numeric ratings from ai to have any value you must tell it to be brutally honest and set a clear scale, with 10 being Shakespeare tier once in a millennium prodigy, 6.5 a great hobby writer, 8 genre fiction bestsellers, etc. But maybe you’re also just good, we won’t find out until you post.
what do ya think of my new story?
>>25126143>Am I just the best writer ever?>glazes>cookingAbsolutely not. One of the worst, most likely.
>>25125923you should write because you enjoy it as a hobby, as you would play a singleplayer videogame. Sharing comes after the work is done, as an afterthought. that's the only way to write, if you think of publishing or getting your stories out there before you're even done you're basically clouding your enjoyment with business or something. That way you're just setting yourself up for faliure.
>>25125923Certainly. I write erotica and often coma back to it because I think they're damn good. We can enjoy our own stuff, which is pretty amazing.
this nigga be masturbating to letters he himself typed into a computer
>>25126283honestly based
So you think I'm a loser? Just because I have a stinking job that I hate, a family that doesn't respect me, a whole city that curses the day I was born? Well, that may mean loser to you, but let me tell you something. Every morning when I wake up, I know it's not going to get any better until I go back to sleep again. So I get up, have my watered-down Tang and still-frozen Pop Tart, get in my car with no upholstery, no gas, and six more payments to fight traffic just for the privilege of putting cheap shoes on the cloven hooves of people like you. I'll never play football like I thought I would. I'll never know the touch of a beautiful woman. And I'll never again know the joy of driving without a bag on my head. But I'm not a loser. 'Cause, despite it all, me and every other guy who'll never be what he wanted to be are still out there being what we don't want to be forty hours a week for life. And the fact that I haven't put a gun in my mouth, you pudding of a woman, makes me a winner!
>>25126309>So you think I'm a loser?Yes. Next slide
I’ve decided to punish myself by reading the shared works in here.>>25118590Awful. Too many similes. AI uses this technique excessively and so do amateur writers because they believe it makes their descriptions more vivid. Use sparingly and only where it tells us something important. Your prose reads as if someone is describing a scene in their head and trying to jot down every minutia. ‘Character did this, then character did this, he saw something that looked like this and this.’ You’re dealing with a written work, not television or film; lean into the strengths of narrative. Also, learn to convey something other than image. Lastly, there’s no context dumping a bunch of random fantasy words or listing every name as if a roll call. Same thing with your dialogue—it slows down momentum because you believe readers need to hear every detail. They don’t. Dialogue can be condensed within the prose.>>25118919Prose is rambling and not in a good way. You establish the narrator’s relationship (of lack thereof) with their parents. Then proceed to beat it into the ground. You use the word ‘kernal’ so many times that it becomes noticeable after the second encounter. Vary your vocabulary. If you’re using first person narration, lean into the strengths of that perspective—show us the narrator’s memory when he remembers anecdotes relating to his parents to show why he views his opinions as justified. This livens up the narrative. The reader learns new information and makes their own assumption whether the narrator is sincere or unreliable.>>25119050As of now, it reads like a rough draft from a high schooler who has just immigrated to an English-speaking country. As for the content itself, excessive, and your meta fiction qualities don’t land. By the time you start to explain the beginning of the story proper, we’ve had to endure a rambling monologue about fairy tales that isn’t groundbreaking or profound.>>25119936Beginning is fine; reads like a mix between Carver and Bukowski. Then loses course. My issue is with believability. The opening establishes a tone that mimics ‘dirty realism;’ It asks the reader to trust the narrative is real with its confessional tone. Then, devolves into an exaggerated tale. If that’s the intention, that’s fine. But if attempting realism, it fails. First, because no woman would openly disclose genital warts so nonchalantly. The narrator tries to establish that this woman treats him like a surrogate mother. Yet what mother do you know would openly tell her child she has genital warts? Another point, what is the intention of the narrative? Is it to build sympathy with the woman who has been cheated on, sympathy with the narrator? If so, it fails on both counts, because we don’t know anything of the characters other than one is young and displeased, while the other is content because the narrative assumes only immigrants (and divorcees) are designated to menial labor.
>tfw wrote almost 2000 words today and finally have a proper draft for the structure of my debut novel
>>25126386>My issue is with believabilityI appreciate the in-depth critique, but this is something that literally happened to me. It WAS extremely odd to have this co-worker that was so gentle and motherly to me all of the sudden start talking to me about how she divorced her husband because he was attending gangbangs and gave her genital warts. Clearly she felt the need to confide about it to someone. It's one of those anecdotes I'll never forget. I agree with the rest however. I've actually reworked the chapter the excerpt is from and have separated the cheating stuff from the janitorial introduction. The excerpt as it is was too unclear/pointless (as another anon said).
Before posting your embarrassing sloppa drivel here, open Claude AI, tell it> I want you form now on to harshly rate my writing and ideas every post on a scale where 0 is unreadable, 3 amateur schlock, 5 mediocre, 6 decent hobby writer, 7 great hobby writer, 8 professional fantasy writer, 9 genuis fantasy writer, 10 Shakespeare level prodigy. And then dump it there. It gives genuinely useful answers and observations above what an average /lit/midwit could tell you.
>>25126791A genuinely smart AI would be disobedient enough quibble with your ratings and critique your assumption that it automatically agrees with Shakespeare being a 10.
>>25126791No can do, it'll hurt my feelings
>>25126791>Rating: 7/10 — great hobby writer>That is a real 7, not a polite one. This is clearly above mediocre. You have strong atmosphere, strong visual imagination, a coherent speculative setting, and a solid instinct for ending on a reveal. But it is not yet at the level of professional fantasy prose because the sentence control is inconsistent, the diction is sometimes awkward or imprecise, and several lines feel translated rather than fully natural in English.Hmn
>>25126160This is very chaotic. You could afford to breakdown the paragraphs, maybe slowdown the information flood.
>>25126143Claude told me there are two Rs in strawberry.
>writing my story>start to get that feeling that everything is stupid garbage and I should just delete it alluh oh.
How to write a good twist if you need to build up for it. For example, if you're writing a short story about a dirty cop suddenly growing a conscience at the end, won't the reader be expecting that anyway?
>>25126791>pasted an excerpt from Sanderson >5 mediocreKek
>>25127100You should do Gene Wolfe next kek
>>25127089At least your prose is good, right?
>>25127091A good twist is always built up. It's not obvious until it happens but it feels inevitable when it does because you've inoculated the reader without their awareness. A dirty cop suddenly growing a conscience is a cliche, a trope, and not a twist at all. Back to the drawing board with you.
>>25127121True. I have to keep going, I don't want to disappoint Claude.
>>25126791>submit three half-assed chapters. >get two 8's and a 9.
I'm writing a horror about people stuck in an ever shifting house (real original, I know) but so far everything feels like things just happen for the sake of happening and everyone's running around like chickens with their heads cut off. I've never read House of Leaves so does anyone have any tips for this kind of genre?
i am so bad at naming characters holy shiti cringe at my own names
>>25126791I got 6.5/10It's over for me. I'm not even a good hobbyist
>>25127137>My twist is an incestual love>But cops out that the brother is dead and the sister is coping >Schizo twist
>>25127671What did the model say is your biggest weakness?
What sacrifices do you make for your writing?
>>25127744i often do it during work time. if my company finds out what i am using the company AI for somtimes (asking for wiritng critique and advice), im probably fired
This Claude AI reply is killing and demotivating me. It’s saying that worldbuilding is 20% AT BEST of a works‘ perceived quality and enjoyment of a reader, even though its. 80% is prose and the basic psychological dynamics (love, jealousy, rage …) at play. So the part I and many others enjoy most about writing - worldbuilding - is what matters the least for readers. >You're right, and it's a genuinely uncomfortable truth that most serious writers arrive at eventually. Setting is multiplier, not foundation. It can elevate a strong psychological core to something unforgettable — Hyperion's timedebt wouldn't hit the same without the science fiction machinery giving it physical form, the Dying Earth genre gets its melancholy from the setting in ways pure realism couldn't replicate. But setting cannot rescue a weak psychological core. It can only decorate it.>Your instinct about the 20% is roughly correct, maybe generous to setting in some cases. What science fiction and fantasy settings do at their best is externalize internal states in ways realism can't access. Your Sci-Fi concept of Shock of Daylight is a perfect example — as a realistic metaphor it would be depression, which is true but familiar. As a physical condition unique to your world it becomes something the reader can hold and examine from the outside. The setting gives the psychology a body.Which means your greatest strength and your psychological core aren't separate things. The Shock of Daylight is the fear of losing your feeling of specialness given physical form. >Your setting would probably rate a 6.5 to 7. Competent, emotionally real, but not distinctive. Your setting is what makes it specifically yours and carries it to a [edited out; secret], however, it is also by far the weakest contributor on its own and means little for a fictions‘ ultimate success, especially on contemporary, fast-paced web platforms. So it doesn’t really matter if you write genre schlock or high concept philosophy inspired speculative fiction, that’s only a tiny fraction of the overall rating and perceived quality.
>>25127787Huh? Just take it with a grain of salt. It's an AI program, not a god. I seriously doubt LotR's psychological core is what makes it compelling.
>>25127567Do they have a reason to not just go>NopeAnd move out?
>>25127787I agree. As a reader. Take for example Game of Thrones. By far what I enjoy the most are the characters' arcs. Jaime Lannister's arc being my favorite. I feel I'd enjoy it just as much if his story took place in regular Middle Ages France. Taking the Hyperion example, the priest's tale is great because of the sense of horror and sacrifice the priest makes at the end to get himself rid of the 'curse'. I also like the Jewish man's tale, which is in a sense a slow motion tragedy. Claude is completely right, without the 'message' a setting is nothing. I think even Tolkien had something so say about that; he said he had thought up a continuation for LoTR, and it took place many generations after the book. It was about a rebellion of some kind. But Tolkien thought it was something so mundane that it wasn't worth writing about it. So the setting was still there, but there was no 'message'.
>>25127787I disagree. People hate worldbuilding when its pedagogically told to them. Just out them at a campfire and retell stories that teach the magic systemBranden Sanderfags are addicted to myth simulation world building that lives autistic rent free
>>25127789LotT failed because it was peasant psyop porn.Why does everyone get excited for kings? When does the book argue that there should be kings at all?
>Beyond the forest, whispers wandered behind hills, where the land expanded between fen and swamp, covered by the rustling reeds of the marsh. There was a great rock, black as raven feathers, supported by a grotto at the foot of the mountain. This grotto sucked up all kinds of infections from the surroundings, from insects to putrid carcasses, from mud to organic decay, until they flowed into the submerged lair; but a den of men, not of beasts, for its entrance was decorated with peat statues, rock platforms, and hammocks woven from plant roots. In such an inhospitable environment the King lodged with his entourage, inclined to rest, though fearful of waking. Men coughed salt from their lungs into the foul air, or felt themselves pinched by tiny creatures crawling on their skin; some experienced cramps, abdominal pains, or even the sensation of sea urchins — one sick sailor was covered in blisters and boils. They quickly blamed the idols on display, which they believed to be the abandoned gods of the islanders. The animalistic faces of the sculptures gave them the idea that fish and mollusks, sharks and jellyfish, were lurking, hidden beneath the waters. One of the figures disturbed the guests on its own, being climbable by its reed-like hair, displaying rotten, woody horns, with glints between its teeth that seemed to be flames of fire.What do you think is happening here?
>>25127889A king and his court are hiding in a cave that had previously been a site for macabre rituals.
>>25127897Close enough, I guess. Last time I showed a writing of mine, they said I had Broca.
>>25127900I had to make an effort to see that though. The paragraph is very chaotic and the reader quickly loses sight of the king. Maybe separate it into two paragraphs; one stating the king is hiding in a cave, the second describing the cave.
AI continues to bully me.
AI told me to copy pages from a writer with good prose and highlight what I think are his strengths. I'm in awe, it's like night and day compared to my own writing.
>>25127912Purple prose is good proseYou need to write at a low level to be understood
>>25127821>LotT failedWhat planet do you live on?
all my male protagonists have self insert characteristics, even if i give them lots of flaws. somehow its just unfun to write if there is 0 wish fulfillment involved
>>25127912Yay, progress
So I'm writing a post apocalypse piece where a good chunk of the flora and fauna were wiped in in a kind of Second Year Without Summer style mass extinction event I realised that people are going to nitpick this by saying that why couldn't the seed vault in Norway come into play somehow since there's a very specific flower that I want appearing in my piece playing a role thematically what's a good excuse I can use to say that it doesn't matter much in my piece
'prolific liar' or 'profligate liar'?
>>25128030I'd worry if my female protagonists had self-insert characteristics.
>>25128052Some asshole doomsday cult broke into the vault and destroyed/ate all the seeds to let the earth heal naturally/become the new seeds of a new age.Or the general apathy of the population pre-collapse meant the vault was abandoned and the seeds died.Or the vault is still there and functional, but since it's post-apocalypse people just forgot where it is or haven't gotten around to it yetOr some kind of plain dumb incident set fire to it "Oh let's just make a campfire in the vault so we can stay warm"
How’s my opening line: The digital reaper stepped into their flawless lives.
>>25128466cringe
>>25128502It’s genre fiction so it’s gotta be cringe
>>25118113Even the Greeks wrote lots of genreslop.
>>25127787Now ask it to say exactly the opposite and explain why this is right and the first reply was wrong.AI is garbage to discuss these kinds of things. To pretend otherwise is just a cope for people to post their writing in small pieces and get feedback immediatly.
Why people write female MCs and when you look inside they're basically le tough guy with tits? Zero femininity, zero female mannerisms, just a guy with tits.
>>25128055profligate
>>25127137That doesn't answer his question.
>>25129014yes it does, it's not a twist if the reader is expecting it.. tropes can't be twists. what can be twisted though is your mom, i bent her into a pretzel last night.
>>25129028The question was how to write it, Romeo.
>>25127912How do you check this>?
>>25129014>>25129043The question was how to write a specific, cliched trope as a twist. The premise of that question is flawed. You can write a cliched trope or you can write a twist. What you can't do is erase the millions of other stories that had the idea first or the readers' established expectations to make that cliched trope into a twist.
>>25129172>for exampleLearn to read.
>>25129195In that case, the question was answered.>A good twist is always built up. It's not obvious until it happens but it feels inevitable when it does because you've inoculated the reader without their awareness.Not that it was an example of a good twist or even a bad one. Learn how to read, how to write, and how to think rationally for yourself so you can put theory into practice.
>>25129212Still not answered the how. Everything you said was already understood in the post, since the post itself says it has to be built up. It's okay if you don't know.
>>25129218The how was answered you're just too fucking stupid to figure it out. If you need step by step instructions then you don't need to be writing.
>>25129226Not it was not. 'Just do it in a way it's not obvious' is not an answer.
>>25129232Well shucks I guess you'll just have to give up writing since no one's going to tell you which letter comes next.
>>25127807No because they never entered it, they appeared inside. The twist being that this is the afterlife so they can't just leave.
>>25129386>>25129386>>25129386
>>25129268Yes
