And but so
>"Are you looking for anything?">"Yes, please show me where you keep your Wallace">"Wallace? like David FOSTER Wallace? Whoa, cool, I thought you were gonna ask for that Steve Jobs biography or something. Yeah man, Infinite Jest's right over here.>She hands me a copy of Infinite Jest>her: "So you like Wallace huh, yeah me too, have you read Brief --">I hold up a single open hand while she is speaking, immediately silencing her, then turn to a random page in the book>I smile quietly to myself as I read the entire page, occasionally snorting cryptically>After finishing the page I close the book and hand it back to her, still smiling>Me: "He's terrible, isn't he? Absolutely awful. Put that book back and please show me your Joyce">She puts back Infinite Jest with an alarmed look on her face, then takes me to the Joyce section of the librairie>Her: "Joyce? Yeah I read part of Dubliners in my 400-level community college English class. Do you, uh, d-do you think he's good--">"Read this">I have shoved Finnegans Wake under her nose>"Out loud">her: "ba...babba......bababadgharf....bababagargrfap-->I rip the book out of her hands and stare directly into her eyes>me: "Completely wrong, it's bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoor-denenthurnuk. bababadalgharaghtakamminarronnkonnbronntonnerronntuonnthunntrovarrhounawnskawntoohoohoor-denenthurnuk is portmanteau of various thunder-related words from languages all across the globe; in this context it represents Eve's tragic fall to Satan and the subsequent collapse of Eden. It is perhaps the single most important, emotive, and creative word ever spoken in the entire history of human speech, literally transcending language, and you cannot even read it.">I throw Finnegans Wake in her face and inform the store manager that he has hired an illiterate>I leave the story with a copy of Ark Angel: The Fifth Alex Rider Adventure under my coat, unpaid for
>TVs with remotes become a thing>Western civilization has collapsed, I must kill myself Good riddance.
>>25211034If I pull off that bandana, will he die?
>>25211043No, it wouldn’t be painful either, but if you told him about tiktok brainrot he’d kill himself.
>the autist is onto dfw now
>>25211040He was right though.
>>25211037that post is gayer than literal gay porn.
It always triggers my schizophrenia a bit that his wife has the same name as the wife from House of Leaves.
>>25211242We call that which is gayer than gay porn “/lit/ humor” here, old boy.
>>25211248but Joyce is not literature.
>>25211037Quite a humorous pasta you've concocted, but there are some improvements you can make for next time.1. Females, generally speaking, don't like DFW. Find a different author.2. The Steve Jobs bio is a dated bit, you may as well say 'The Da Vinci Code' given how long ago they were popular.2. Several lines contain typos that I don't believe to be intentional5. I missed point number 46. You checked7. You probably noticed I repeated 28. But did you notice I kept 67?
>>25211037
did he tho
and but like lo
Wardine be cry
>>25211034LOCATION: Middle America DATE: 10/11/2001SUBJECT: Duh, stupid The flags were big. Disturbingly big. Where did they get flags that big. I was walking down the street when I saw a flag so big, so insanely big it covered an entire facade, that I forgot I was in the middle of a suburb and wondered if the American Nazi Party had taken over. I was so caught up in the spectacle of to, that I bumped into someone on the street. They asked, “Where’s your flag?”—“My flag?”—They called out, “Are you in-American? Didn’t you see what happened on TV?” I was perspiring profusely when suddenly someone gave me a handkerchief, patterned like the American flag. “Excuse me,” I blurted. “Can you point me in the direction of the flag store? I’d like to buy a flag to drape over my T.V.”—“Huh?”—“Y’know,” I continued. “To commemorate all the people who were charred alive and crushed by the falling debris at the Twin Towers.”—“I want to show I’m a patriot.”—“Oh…. Then you want the flag store.”—“Yeah. Where is it?”—“Next to the T.V. store. You can’t miss it. It’s next to the big flag.”—“O.K.”
