>no new thread before old one dies
/wg/ is dead.

>>25301232
You people shouldn't let me make the new threads, I only ever do it late and I usually shill something.

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Remember to report this self-advertising spamming fag and don't post in his threads. He's spamming this thread to advertise his book.

>>25301246
Which book might that be?

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>>25301215
He fellow writers. I made that sandbox thread a few days back about the pruning being the end of the world for in thread characters. Well the thread got got. 404. Gone. But the characters made it out in time. And they live on below. If you invested in creating your character there, in the prunned thread, your character awaits. Mr Changchang Zhang, your chariot awaits. If not, then don't worry. Everyone dies in the end.

>>>/qst/6416839
>>>/qst/6416839

So a question to commercial, anons: what's the best, or at least a good one, structure for a first chapter? I've seen people say you need to start in medias res, use little exposition, and throw the reader right into the action, etc. One thing I've noticed myself is that the first chapter tends to be a taste of what the book is about, so, for example, if you're writing a crime story, then you need a detective and a body right at the start.

>>25301358
I always just put my ending right at the beginning of the book. So then the reader is captured and they read the rest thinking that something else is going to happen but no, by the time they realize it, it’s too late. They’re already 2/3 through and they have to finish because I’m such a good writer they can’t put it down.

>>25301393
>flips to the last pages
Heh, get raped.

Consumptive Cur is a horrendous title. It's both clunky to say and generally nonsensical.
Imagine saying to a friend, "Hey, have you read 'Consumptive Cur?'" and not having the conversation end with them losing your number.

it appears that dark triad is causing some seethe

>>25301418
It's the book's marketing that's causing the seethe, the book itself is inoffensive aside from being mediocre at best

>>25301409
It makes even less sense when you realize the book is actually about production and the main character is named "Kitty."

>>25301497
>mediocre at best
So... leagues above anything else posted here?

>>25301508
People here tend to not shill as shamelessly as you.

>>25301510
That's not true in the slightest. There's always at least one, from F Gadner to Boor the bore, to many more in the future.

>>25301508
No, most of anything is mediocre, you're just another in the mediocre majority

>>25301510
he is not shilling, he is just excited about his book. there is nothing wrong with that. if you ever wrote a masterpiece yourself, you would understand.

Looks like Maid in Four Parts has made the best ad we've ever seen here. Has anybody read it yet?

>>25301630
I don't like how many words you (the author and maker of that ad) like to cram into spaces meant to be carried by visuals. That ad is an ugly block of text. Why do I need to know that I can click it to learn more? I'm not a fucking retard. Is the writing in your book like this, too? Do you feel the need to cram in all the information you can into the text, overexplain, and underwhelm?
Also 4chan ads are a money sink since nobody smart enough to read is dumb enough not to use adblock on this porn website.

>There is a $25 fee when submitting a book for Publishers Weekly review consideration.
Imagine having the gall to advertise here with a paid """review"""

>>25301627
>isn't shilling
>advertises and talks it up constantly
no, that's shilling. have a spine
what kind of person sucks up to a literally who

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Usually I draw comics in /ic/ but I decided to venture myself in making a novel. I never managed to write a novel longer than 20 pages so this will be quite a chalenge lol. I may use this as a base for a future comic like I did before btw

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/73759/no-place-for-idealists/chapter/1331723/the-dying-empire

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Is my protagonist a convincing maniac?

>>25301710
In a similar boat to you. Used to write comics but paying for art and working with artist got super expensive.

Wtf sound do bullets make when they fly by?

>>25301758
anon there are literally terabytes of combat footage on youtube and other sites

>>25301762
Yeah but I need the onomatopoeia...

>>25301712
>uses turn signals
no

>>25301758
>>25301763
Snap. Or crack. Fwip or bzz if subsonic.

>>25301780
I think I'm just settling for "three bullets whiz by". It's sad, and pathetic, but it's all I got for now.

>>25301661
it was probably created by AI

>>25301744
>working with artist got super expensive.
hasn't that problem been solved by AI?

>>25301758
they go kajoom and splick splack

>>25301684
we try to support our writers here

>>25301795
I mean is the specific use of an onomatopoeia important in your context? bullets can fly, sing, whistle, blow past, cleave the air, trace a path, etc.

>>25301826
Thanks, I can use this later
>>25301834
It's a screenplay, so I was trying to get the sound effect right. But then I realized it doesn't really fucking matter that much.

Your book a shit

>>25301934
>>25301934
You can have it.

https://litter.catbox.moe/aekfrrbh9vqbcjzd.pdf

>>25301934
imagine if you had to book a shit whenever you had to do your daily necessities. this is kind of what boarding school was like

>the female characters need significantly more interiority

WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS EVEN MEAN?

>>25302049
They're noticeably less deep than the male ones

>>25302049
It means if female characters are more competent than males, you made feminist yass queen shitslop.

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>>25302067
Only after posting that I realized it said interiority and not inferiority.

Did 1100 words today.

>>25302064
So... real life?

>>25302067
But we love Victoria here

>>25302071
Just do what I do: write every single character as male and then go back and select some at random and make them female but don't change anything else

>>25301418
it's always the same, whenever something big drops, there's first astonishment and then seething. you all remember when f. gardner unveiled his CoC

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I keep writing myself into corners.
>have MC return to his homeland to face trial
>need him to continue his journey
>his crime is sorta low key but still significant
>decide to have him transported to a different place for "not technically prison" and then make an escape because someone decides to kill him instead of letting him escape
>now realize that MC's honour would have him go to prison anyway
>have to rewrite the trial just to have have exile be his punishment
>but that just too conveniently fits his plans anyway
>so now have to decide on something different, like getting a prison break
Having an MC with flaws and past crimes but also an incredible sense of honour sucks.

>>25302098
Honestly, this year seems somewhat interesting in the sense that there’s a lot of anons publishing their own work in a short time span, Between Dark Triad, A Maid in Four Parts, Sinner’s Descent and Consumptive Cur, there’s been alot of known /lit/-adjacent releases this year.

Frankly, it’s nice to see some anons put their money where their mouth is and actually produce something. I’d say all of those works have more artistic merit than anything F Gardner put out, since he was just using /pol/-pandering as a mask for poor writing.

>>25302186
I need to stop writing erotica and write something worthwhile so I can join the published anons.

>>25302186
>all shit

>>25301824
I'd rather not. Working with an artist for proper paneling is still superior right now

>>25302213
Who do you think is getting published these days?
Just write the next "I walked into an alternate dimension where my childhood friend has a massive dick and was rich and abusive instead of just a nice guy."

>>25302237
>500-5000 USD - Get something I might be happy with, people will love you for excepting your 4th revision despite the artist not really understanding what you are asking for.
>Free - Completely custom and instantaneous, people will hate you for using it.

>>25301215
>same AI slop image again
fuck off

I'd surely make a living off my writing if I only managed to make myself write. Surely.

>>25302246
Yeah, if I could write fem porn I'd be doing it. Instead here I am liking incest.
I should just try to warn regular genre.

>>25302291
write NTR

>>25302291
>if I could write fem porn
>Instead here I am liking incest.
You're not gonna believe this.

>>25302098
it was an even bigger deal when honor levy unveiled hers. nobody had suspected what she'd been carefully hiding all that time down her pants, but finally she must have gotten the okay from her publisher. they were like, ok, you can let it out now, girl. and bam! she just slammed that big monster onto the table like that. like, eat that, gardner. everybody was like whoa! whoa, honor! there was immediate seething, but most people were just like "wow..." "wow!" and that was the day, if you all remember, when she became our queen.

>>25302277
Checked and felt

>>25302449
>honor levy
had no idea who this was, googled her, found out she grew up rich in LA, first book is titled "My First Book" and she's known for her "chronically online prose."
Truly vomitous stuff.

>>25302449
Is having a dick a fantasy of yours?

>>25302250
>Completely custom
Except it isn't. You can only cross your fingers and hope the autocompleter follows your prompt, doesn't throw anything extra you don't want in, and successfully avoids any egregious mistakes like weird hands. The only way you're going to get "completely custom" art is to acquire a new skill.

>>25302983
>doesn't throw anything extra you don't want in
This retard doesn't know how to use a negative prompt.

>>25303265
This retard knows more about whatever the fuck negative prompts are than how to draw

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>>25303289
post art

I will write today.

>>25302449
and that is also why we have a strict "no vagina" policy here. because our queen is a jealous queen.

>>25301215
I feel like the way Final Fantasy VII handled its character writing was really magical and I'm trying to break down why it worked so well so I can use it for my own writing
It feels like at its core, the character writing of that game is really grounded and realistic. Now by default, if you're writing for a mass audience, the biggest risk is that you bore people. To prevent this, they have extreme and intense plot events constantly happening. This allows your characters to have those intense emotional reactions that people love without breaking verisimilitude.
A lot of stories do this. What I think separates FFVII from the rest though is something else. It's how the writers are more than happy to stereotype and exaggerate their characters for things that don't matter. Each of the characters fit into an archetype: You've got your pure innocent maiden, your badass fun-loving fighting chick, your silly mascot, your brooding loner, etc. This is constantly played for laughs and entertainment, but when things get serious (like in Gongaga), all the stereotype stuff just completely disappears in an instant, and for a brief moment everything is dead serious and realistic. This is of course not unheard of; you see it pretty often in sitcoms and kids' shows where things get briefly serious to deliver you a moral lesson. But you rarely see this used to deliver very deep, serious, realistic writing. Almost always, if a story has some very deep, serious, and realistic writing, it is played straight the whole way through. I think this actually might be totally unnecessary. Like if you have a character whose stereotype is that they're bossy and rude, you don't actually lose anything by making them super bossy and rude in a funny way when important things aren't happening. So long as you don't go over the top with it like anime does (E.g. Bossy character slaps your protagonist and forces them to scrub the entire house, repaint the walls, powerwash the driveway, and do the dishes), you're good. You can exaggerate a lot of normal dialogue and gain a lot of fun and expressiveness without actually losing anything in your writing

>>25303413
No wonder you people write the shit you do when you're out here unironically lauding fucking Final Fantasy's writing

>>25303438
I guarantee you I write better than you, because I filled out the entire text box writing about something I'm genuinely passionate about and love, whereas you wrote a lazy, snarky quip about how anime is bad. This is why I barely post on 4chan anymore. I have that passion in me and most of you apparently don't. I have never responded to someone just being genuine about their interests and passions and going, "HEH. Did you know that thing that inspired you is actually shit?!?" Literally what is the point. I know you're just going to go, "Heh, well THAT was a bit of an overreaction :^)" and ignore what I'm actually saying, because I've talked to countless guys like you, you're all over 4chan, and it's actually why I've moved away from posting on this site over time. I remember when this was the cool counterculture site. You're basically being a Karen right now. "Umm, final fantasy?? How cringe!!!!" What, you wanna go on about hazbin hotel next? Let's hear your list of socially approved media, because surely that's what writers need right? We need to be more close minded. We need to only expose ourselves to certain parts of the world, and only be inspired by socially approved sources. Yeah, that's so based and vril bro. Good shit

>>25303473
replies like this are a signal that you're a massive faggot. take note, sweaty.

>>25303477
See if I'm scrolling Instagram reels and I accidentally scroll into, God help us, a My Little Pony reel, why then believe you me I'm averting my eyes immediately, I might even chuck my phone across the room, screen be damned! Because if for one second, I mean if my eyes catch sight of a SINGLE DAMN PONY and I get even the faintest drop of inspiration out of this heathen media, well then by god I'm going to step outside and pick up the biggest, nearest rock to my domicile and crack open my skull if I have to. Them's the breaks. See, you can't just be inspired by MLP. It's not allowed. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't you EVER fucking do it, I swear. It doesn't even matter if it's how the ponies are named, or how they're written, or the color palettes or anything like this. Just avert your eyes you fucking chud. Open Rumble. Watch a good ol' Nick Fuentes clip. Just do anything but expose yourself to that bullshit, because it's just not allowed, mmkay?!?

>>25303413
Nobody gives a shit about your essay here. Now post your excerpt because its all about execution.

>>25303487
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ImK6Xdu2CUs

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>>25303483
>See if I'm scrolling Instagram reels and I accidentally scroll into, God help us, a My Little Pony reel, why then believe you me I'm averting my eyes immediately, I might even chuck my phone across the room, screen be damned! Because if for one second, I mean if my eyes catch sight of a SINGLE DAMN PONY and I get even the faintest drop of inspiration out of this heathen media, well then by god I'm going to step outside and pick up the biggest, nearest rock to my domicile and crack open my skull if I have to. Them's the breaks. See, you can't just be inspired by MLP. It's not allowed. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't you EVER fucking do it, I swear. It doesn't even matter if it's how the ponies are named, or how they're written, or the color palettes or anything like this. Just avert your eyes you fucking chud. Open Rumble. Watch a good ol' Nick Fuentes clip. Just do anything but expose yourself to that bullshit, because it's just not allowed, mmkay?!?

>>25301795
make up your own like wffzzzeerrrr or squerzoooned by, cmon guys be inventive!

Heh, he called me an ironic, jaded, dispassionate dork? I'll prove him wrong by..... quoting him with a basedjak

>>25303492
the irony is the basedjak is you in this case. he was making fun of YOU

>>25303499
Unfortunately, I'm not inventive though

>>25303592
wow bro, i don't stick little pony figurines up my ass. guess the joke's on me!

>>25303602
Just proving his point. And you’re wrong, btw. Don’t be so close-minded. Anyway, can we get back to the writing thread?

>>25301358
An editor I met at a convention once told me to start the first chapter with a dialogue. It will force you to be 'in the moment' at the start, and not lose yourself in exposition.

>>25303289
>>25303302
Getting mogged by an AI bootlicker is pretty sad

>>25303350
Source?

I might not write the trap elves novel, after all. After I write, then what? I'm not that invested in LGBT shit to build a brand over it, and if I write something else, the fans won't trust me.

>>25303739
Congratulations on choosing not to be a literary prostitute.

>For decades, across the North American wilderness, there have been sightings and reports of a strange, bipedal, ape-like creature roaming around. Nobody knows for sure exactly what these mysterious beings are, some experts have weighed in, saying they are nothing more than apparitions, brought on by exhaustion and dehydration from hikers over exerting themselves, while others claim a more esoteric origin for them, suggesting that they are possibly part of some long-forgotten, unrecorded chapter of humanity’s history.

I'm going to write the great Sasquatch novel, wish me luck friends, and rate my opening.

>>25303984
0

>>25303413
VIII is a far better game, with better characters, a better story, and a better memory/identity plotline.
and frankly the characters in games/anime like those are pretty cartoonish even during the serious moments.
with all of that being said, of course it’s a wildly popular game series and if you’re writing a commercial genre book then there’s much much worse inspiration to draw from than final fantasy.

>>25303984
Something about this paragraph is stilted. It doesn't even come off as "news-sy", rather just boring to read.
If this is the style the entire book is in, you might need to give less exposition.

>>25303984
This is the intro to a highschool essay on american folklore, not the opening paragraph to a novel.

>have to wait months for an agent to open query
>wait anotehr month for their rejection
>if accepted, wait a few months for them to try and sell the book
>if sold the book, wait another months for editor teams to look at it
>another year for their edits and return
>then another year to edit with the publishers request
>then another few months to market
>then finally, release the book
I give up. I'm going to self publish. Speed is far more important in today's world.

>>25304108
cope. your'e just bad and not good enough to be traditionally published

Berserk os fucking amazing. I'll never tell a story like this.

Only 600 words today, but I'm basically at the halfway point now> One of my characters just realized that killing is fun

>>25304144
>>25303413
I see... Anime and video games are the influences for todays writers.

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>>25304227
My influences are my thoughts and life experiences, but what do I know?

>>25304227
What is your influence? Some anime fight against a whale with gay sailors?

>>25304227
>>25304279
Why you think LitRPG is so popular?

>influence
THEFT IS THE PATH AND THE LIGHT OF BLISSFUL STORYTELLING YE MONGRELS

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>inspiration comes when I don't have time to write anything or am away from the computer
>inspiration fucks off the moment I sit my ass in front of the page
please tell me I'm not alone I'm fucking losing it

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Stumbled upon this book and have had no urge to write but its kinda fun to maybe write some stuff down. Fatherhood or being a man are topics I like to read and think about. Or a love story because I grew up on romcoms with my mom. I like tenderness. Im not really broken as a person or dont have a big story to tell but I dont see a point in writing if others dont read it.

How do you write knowing that someone might not ever read what you write?

>>25304433
I know that feel.
>Start carrying around a pen and paper so I can always write the moment inspiration strikes
>Inspiration no longer strikes

>>25304433
I thought that was only for me.

>>25304437
That's not the question you should be asking. You should be asking how to write knowing you're not good enough to write something wroth reading.

>>25304279
for me its petty alcoholics that whine about hardships

>>25304433
I wrote a really good quote on a slip of paper at work. I hope someone liked it.

>>25304433
Start carrying around a small notebook

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>>25304437
>How do you write knowing that someone might not ever read what you write?
By having something worth reading.
Nobody owes me their time. This does not take away the value of what I put down.

"The light was just beginning to fade when his eyes landed on a honeybee. Taking another long drag of his cigarette before focusing on it. The bee was buzzing about the weeds around his feet before finally settling on a decent sized dandelion. Something felt off. This image didn’t sit right with him. A bee landing on a flower, it would be picture-esq if not for the hundreds of cigarettes butts littering the ground around him. Natures industrial worker carrying out its tasks surrounded by the discarded trash of man. He ashed his cig, careful not to disturb the insect. He looked carefully at it, as if he saw something of himself in it. He was a worker bee of sorts after all. On his last break. The parking lot behind him was silent, only the drone of the manufacturing plant behind him could be heard over his tinnitus. The highway was unusually dead. He hadn’t seen a car pass by since he walked out to smoke. Even the birds were absent. Only the bee disturbed the stillness of dusk."

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>>25304456
>>25304497
Going to chew on this. Thanks.

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>>25301956
first glance, and i'll peruse it, but 5 pages to start with? back story. Put that in the end for publication in this format. imho. get right to it. You can try writing to the reader directly like Stephen King does via, "dear reader". Of informally, use parenthesis. pic rel.

Your sentence structure is nice. Good flow. Decent meter. That background intro? sux. Makes it look official sure but I once submnitted a copy of my stuff for a contest, and it had a backstory like yours does. The alternate timeline thing. I got declined, of course.

I got some advice from them: Instead of telling us, this and that. Show us this and that. Character is in some different timeline. Ok. Instead of a preamble, make it a newspaper article he's reading.

One of the best advice I ever got was to use the weight of words or phrases to generate a back story. Look up 'gerund phrase'. Use it often for word effeciantcy. Write : "The crinkled mud smeared newpaper, dated 1775 read the headline: Local man discovers the gerund phrase. Instead of: The paper laying on the ground flipped to the front headline, the wind flipping it open. The type read: "Local man discovers a phrase".

More backstory per word. they actually measure that with some index thing. Fucking word nerds, you know? (anyways, that just between me and (you)). Another tip? To hone voice: This, [that], (the other thing). Once you get it proper, do it sans the voice tools. [ i hope everyone get this, including (you) ].

>>25304615
People have an near religious hate for backstory and exposition. Sometimes I wonder if people really like to read or if they'd rather be watching a moving but can't find one to scratch the itch.

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>>25304615
What backstory?

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>>25304626
5 pages of what the civil war did, before the writer shows us what the civil war does, is terrible. We all know what happened IRL. What happens in your world? What? the south was upset because the north's inner city youth had a beef over some horse shoes that got stepped on by a rival horse gang. Word in the barn is that the north's horse gangs hold their meat in the pot side ways, to show they aint' tripin'.

sorry, just wanted to use tripin' in a sentence.

One last point before getting back to a scene. :


'It wouldn’t be long now.'. That sentence is worthless to the story. What won't be long now? Coffee? I think they are making fresh turkey since thanksgiving wont be long now--just 4 months. Wont be long now.

Call me a fag, get your revenge on me: check out my writing here and if you want join in. No rush. that board is perfect for long term story writing with collaboration.
>>>/qst/6416839

4chan is were you can fuck up and no one will know that you are actually a dog on the internet.

>dell, glade, clearing
Why did the English decide to name every centimeter of a forest?

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>>25304736
Wait, you're criticizing the Author's Note without actually reading the Author's Note? That's a new one for /wg/.

wg, the more I think about going back to my unfinished second draft the scarier it becomes. There's so many obvious things I missed that I took way too damn long to notice and now I'm in no way qualified to write it

>>25304830
Better to do something than to live in fear of it

>>25304830
I hope you read through part 7 of that blog post from previous thread.

if I buy a new laptop will it finally make me write?
what software would I have to install on the new laptop to finally be driven to write?
god I hate that I never have

I have noticed a have tendency for melodrama, which is strange because I've never read much of it; I haven't even read Pride and Prejudice. Is it a low skill thing or did that come with me?

>>25304747
Because they had a lot of experience surgically removing it all.

are y'all niggas big-brained english majors or just pretentious sissies?
i have a question about grammar and don't know where to ax it.

>>25304105
Kek, this exactly. Sounds like he’s writing a non-fiction essay.

>>25305779
I'm ESL and never studied English in my life.

>>25305779
Submit your question and we’ll evaluate whether it’s worth answering.

Also holy shit this is the single worst edition of /wg/ in all of /lit/ history. Who are these fags arguing about which MLP character they like most?

>>25305785
ok, evaluate this:
why come it's common to say "busy [verb+ing]" when neither present participles nor gerunds can be used as complements of predicative adjectives? it would only make sense if busy was an adverb but i don't see any dictionaries listing it as such; it's only listed as a verb that's used with reflexive pronouns.

>>25305800
is it really that common to say "busying?" i've never heard anyone say that and can't think of an example from a book.

>>25305805
???
nah, nigga. wtf? i meant shit like "busy working".

get busy working on this bussy

>>25305800
Busy is an adjective describing the state of someone or something. You could ask the same about idly. Where do you see busy listed as a verb?

>>25305822
Ok in the way you’re using it it’s an adjective, but yes it can be an adverb or a verb so idk what the question really is. The answer is it depends on the use?

>>25305822
idly is an adverb, lil bro. go back 2 skool.
https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/busy

I want to write, but I have nothing to say or any stories to tell.

>>25305905
Literally me.

>>25305800
>I’m busy working.
Busy is still an adjective in that sentence because it’s describing I, not describing the kind of work I’m doing. If anything, working is a participle or gerund describing what kind of busy I am (am I busy shitting, busy working, busy scrolling my phone?). You can basically think of that sentence as
>I am busy with work.

>>25305905
You're supposed to make up stories