Ok guys, I want you to be my matchmaking service, I need a mare that:>Knows how to cook.>That she is a bit of a hoof fetishist.>Prefers to have fun at home>Doesn't travel much>Likes the cold more than the heat.>She doesn't drink>She should not be noisy>She should have a sweet voice>Not to be a poor mare who lives in a van
>>42561608>She doesn't drinkDon't worry, OP! I've got just the mare for you!
>>42561672>invisible mareI like the sound of that.
>>42562439She's not real, you dip.
Sweetie Belle wants what?!
>>42561608>Twilight SparkleHas never fun. Can't cook for the life of it. Travels a lot. Probably prefers the cold and is not a noisy waif though. Sorry Tara, your voice is many things, but it isn't sweet.>RarityHuge hoof fetishist, yes - but more in the receiving end. But also travels a lot and is a noisy nag. Try not to be home when she is drinking wine challenge. Also, she does not know how to cook. NO, putting a frozen pizza into the oven doesn't count, Rara.>ApplejackDefinitely knows how to cook. Loves licking others' hooves. Likes summer way more than winter. Doesn't travel a lot. She is a sportspony, so she also likes to have fun. Maybe a good pick for you if you can handle her, baka.>Pinkie PieLOVES FUN. You love fun, right? Oh, wait, she does drink a ton. She is also a poor ass bum, which we can't have. And yeah, she is very noisy, but maybe you can convince her to play an indefinite match of "Which pony can stay quiet for longer wins"?>Rainbow DashYeah, no. Just kys. Bottom of the barrel; don't even consider it. Actually... maybe... I have heard rumours that she is totally a tradwife and will become submissive after you marry her. Try your luck?>FluttershyStays at home, like, all the time. But even though she is not the noisy one, her animals very much are, you autistic misophoned bitch. Sweet voice? Check. Definitely loves to try your exotic fetishes. Probably scared of drinking as well. But again, she is fucking poor. Hmmm, still maybe a good match for you. Baby's first waifu right?>Apple BloomFirst pedo pick. Maybe knows or will get to know how to cook. Likes to adventure around a ton; prefers summer. Scared of hooves after the incident. Doesn't drink, well, she is a filly. A very demanding filly. Will definitely nag you to buy the groceries.>Sweetie BelleMost patrician choice. LOVES to pamper and cook for you. She WILL get better at it as she gets older. She is a slow learner, be patient. Sweet voice? Ha, it is in her name. BESTEST voice + a singer. Hoof fetishist? Yeah, she will want you to gobble up her hindlegs, definitely. Though, again, noisy; and, she is probably going to inherit Rarity's drinking habits.>ScootalooDoesn't travel much because she can't. Will do anything for you if you are the one for her. Doesn't want to spend much time at home. Is a really broke ass filly who does not even have a van she can seek shelter in. Very clingy, you won't be much alone with her. You don't like that, I assume.>Starlight GlimmerLoves to just spend time with you at home and play fun games. Introverted quiet type. Probably prefers the cold. Doesn't drink out of religious zealousness. The castellan of Twilight's castle; no, she is not poor, she is stacked. However, the closest she came to cooking is when she got cooked in a political debate by Twilight. Probably a good choice for you all things considered.Applejack, Fluttershy, Sweetie Belle, Starlight Glimmer. Pick your bride. Don't forget to tip me.
