Be a Mormon. Our founding prophet, Joseph Smith, was a 14-year-old American farm boy who prayed to God and received a divine visitation from the Father and the Son. He translated an ancient record of Christ's visitation to the Americas. It's a story of faith, revelation, and the restoration of Christ's true church on Earth. It's wholesome. It's about family. Our core theology is that we are the literal spirit children of a loving Heavenly Father. His plan is for us to come to Earth, gain a body, experience life, and through faith in Jesus Christ, return to live with Him as eternal families in the celestial kingdom. It's a plan of happiness and eternal progression. We pay tithing, 10% of our increase. It's a biblical principle. In return, we get to build temples, a global community, and help the poor and needy. It's a sacrifice with a clear spiritual purpose. Our biggest "scandal" is maybe Jell-O salads at a ward potluck. Be a Scientologist. Your "prophet" was a second-rate science fiction writer who famously said "You don't get rich writing science fiction. If you want to get rich, you start a religion." And you guys fell for it. For real. Your core theology is that 75 million years ago, an alien named Xenu brought billions of people to Earth in DC-8-like spacecraft, stacked them around volcanoes, and killed them with hydrogen bombs. Their souls, or "thetans," now cling to humans and cause spiritual harm. This isn't faith, it's the plot of a rejected Star Trek episode. You have to pay hundreds of thousands, even millions of dollars, to "audit" yourself with a lie detector (the e-meter) to get rid of these space ghosts. You have to BUY your own salvation. Lmao. Your "church" harasses critics, forces members to "disconnect" from their own families, and has a secret naval force called the "Sea Org" where people sign billion-year contracts.
>>520086401Gentlemen, one of these is a faith-based, Christ-centered religion focused on family and community. The other is a pay-to-win pyramid scheme based on a bad acid trip. You can call my faith weird all you want. At least our God isn't a space alien from a volcano. We have a prophet who guides us today; you have the ghost of a hack writer who figured out how to milk rich, gullible celebrities for cash. It's not even close. We're playing checkers, they're playing make-believe in a straitjacket.and please come to church
Have like a big cult vs cult fight or something. Fuck off
>>520086401Kys kike
>>520086401What's soaking?
so do i gotta wear the secret underpants so the moron angel will accept me
>>520086517Moron
