Dear Tanya,Thanks for your letter. I appreciate your concern for my well-being. I hope you might have forgiven me by now.I'm really sorry I made those nasty comments about your boobs and your tattoos with my boys last month, right before our match. It was unfortunate and ill-timed.I now understand why you're considered very good at boxing and karate. A guy like me can never match your famed kickboxing skills, speed, and flexibility.As you may know, I have suffered serious injuries after you savagely beat me up during our fight. I have PTSD, broken bones, and a concussion. My face is still swollen from your punches, and an eye hurts bad from that one knee kick you gave me. Even a week later, my body still hurts from your beating. The doctors say it will take me roughly 5 more weeks to be fully discharged.Looking back, I deeply apologize for what I did, but you didn't have to be so brutal on me. Right after the first round, if you remember, you broke my nose and front teeth, and gave me a painful black eye, my face was bleeding and badly swollen, you were staring angrily at me from your side of the ring, I could clearly sense your fury and sheer rage. When we touched gloves for the 2nd round, you may recall that I was trembling, and I repeatedly said sorry to you and requested you to let go of what I said earlier, but no, you pounced on me, gave me a merciless beating, and made sure I left in an ambulance. Tanya, I don't hold a grudge against you, but you should have been a bit merciful back in the ring.In any case, I have learnt my lesson; to be respectful and helpful to amazing, awesome women like yourself. My respect for you has grown very much. I have become a fan of your kickboxing skills. I would like to make up for my mistake by financially supporting your kickboxing career and lifestyle.I promise to be a staunch ally in support of feminist issues when I come back from the hospital.Sincerely,Larry
I would ask for a source for this bizarre fantasy.
