>be Mutt tourist>Need break from Muttland, visit Germany>Eat low fiber diet of pretzels, pork, and beer>Need to take fat shit, greeted by thisWhat the actual fuck is this? Why is there a poop shelf?
>>530037505That sir, is a sir Harrington.
>>530037505Post pic of such a toilet with timestamp please.
It's how you check that your poop is healthy why do American hate healthcare so much. (It's free)
>>530037505No worries when we breed krauts out of existence with refugees we will make a sweeping change across Germany to use normal, human toilets. That and German women made official breeding stock property of nearly U.S. military installation bases throughout the country.
>>530038227If youre sick, you feel sick, no need to rummage in the garbage for evidence to show the teacher. Flush that shit down and just eat an orange bro.
>>530038507American health care lmao. It's called preventative medicine mutt
>>530037505>>530038507even dogs inspect their own shit to determine if they are healthy or notare you saying you're more retarded than a dog?i mean you are a fucking mutt
Because people were making fun of our superior shitters I now have to endure this gayness
>>530038559>>530038621You disgusting freaks. At most all you need to view is poop color. What the fuck are you doing putting your steamers on a shelf - sifting through it with piss? Are you looking for bits of corn? What in the fuck is wrong with you? Perhaps Europeans have been so removed from reality and fucking their women (reserved for: refugees) that they don't understand sticking your face into your own shit is devolved, disgusting, and horrendously retarded.No. The real reason Germans have shelf toilets is because they fetishize shit. Everyone has known this since the 90's with the porn section at Blockbuster video stores. Germans are such disgusting retards that haven't gone through an evolutionary development phase that they were the barbarians used as cheap footsoldiers in the Holy Roman Empire. What absolute filthy abominations. No wonder your women FLOCK to refugees when they're on their period (looking for a real, actual man) than some limp writed, onions sucking, Marvel gauding incel, freak faggots. Get real toilets before we force you to behave.
>>530037505You're supposed to sit on it backwards, facing the wall
>>530037505
>>530038621Dogs also eat shit, are you retarded?
>>530038977Uhh ohh he mad
>>530037505Germans are a proud people. They need to marvel at all their creations, before flushing them down the toilet.
>>530037505https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rzXPyCY7jbs
>>530039137I’ve never seen a poopenshelfen in Denmark. Only Germany.
>>530039232I had one installed. Preventive medicine is important
>>530038168I went to Berlin 10 years ago and there was a poop shelf toilet in every place I used one. Are you implying in 10 years all of the shartenshelfen were removed?
>>530038841this, this and again thistoliet with reststop for the shit accompanied with bidet, either built in or on the side, is the peak of civilised defecation and anyone who says otherwise is filthy jeeti hate the kiss of Poseidon so much its unreal
>>530037505>he does not admire his turds after shitting
>>530039274For the money you could’ve bought yourself a Japanese toilet
>>530039232>poop rolls down the wallsHow the fuck is someone sitting on a standard UK toilet that the turd doesn't drop in the water? Backwards?
>>530037505>das isser
>>530037505don't you want to know how healthy her gestation is? anglos are weird.
>>530037505so you can admire ze Wurst? Nothing wrong with it Germans don't have diarrhea like mutts.
>>530039399also this kek>>530039358and to add for the retards that say ''it leaves stains'' - just put a piece of paper on it firstfucking filthy casuals
>>530038841Remember when Annalena Baerbock ran as a single issue candidate to preserve German poop shelf toilets? Now she wants it to go global.>New York (Associated Press) - Annalena Baerbock, the President of the United Nations General Assembly, a German diplomat known for her blunt pragmatism, has launched an unexpected but attention-grabbing campaign: promoting the worldwide adoption of the Flachspüler, the traditional German shelf-style toilet, as a tool in the fight against global sanitation inequality.>Addressing delegates this week, Baerbock framed the initiative as a practical response to a staggering reality. “Billions of people still live without access to a safe toilet,” she said. “If we are serious about dignity, health, and prevention, we must be willing to rethink not only where toilets exist, but how they work.”>At the center of her proposal is the Flachspüler, a toilet design in which waste initially rests on a flat porcelain shelf before being flushed away. While long a cultural staple in parts of Central Europe—and often the subject of jokes abroad—the design, she argued, offers real public-health advantages.>“Inspection matters,” she told reporters. “The Flachspüler allows users and health workers to visually check for parasites, blood, or other warning signs before flushing. In regions where laboratory diagnostics are scarce, early detection can save lives.”
>>530039411Then I couldn't look at my poop
>>530039690continued>The President has backed her words with action. According to UN facilities officials, several restrooms at UN Headquarters in New York have already been retrofitted with Flachspüler units as part of a pilot program. The changes were approved under a broader sanitation modernization effort, though insiders admit the project gained momentum after the Assembly President made one personal requirement unmistakably clear: a Flachspüler must be available to her at all times, whether at UN offices or during official travel, including on airplanes and trains.>“She’s unapologetic about it,” said one diplomat, speaking on condition of anonymity. “She says if world leaders are serious about sanitation, they should be willing to use the same tools they’re advocating.”>Supporters of the initiative, including several public-health NGOs, say the design’s inspection benefit could be especially valuable in refugee camps and rural clinics, where intestinal parasites remain widespread and underdiagnosed. Critics counter that cultural acceptance, water use, and maintenance challenges may limit the Flachspüler’s appeal outside Europe.>Undeterred, the Assembly President has called for pilot programs in partnership with the World Health Organization and UNICEF, emphasizing that the proposal is not about imposing European habits but about expanding options. “There is no single perfect toilet,” she said. “But ignoring designs that can help people understand their own health would be a missed opportunity.”>Whether the Flachspüler becomes a global sanitation symbol or remains a niche experiment, diplomats agree on one point: it is rare for a toilet to become the focus of serious debate at the United Nations. And rarer still for porcelain to be held up as a tool of preventive medicine.
>>530037505>Be me, contracting in Afghanistan>building some expansive biometrics collection framework>Fly around on Blackhawks from FOB to FOB setting up checkpoints with satellite shots to compare fingerprints vs my giant database making $250k>feelsgoodman.bmp>Live in a plywood shack that we built, KBR sources shower/shitter trailers from various contractors in the Levant and Europe >They must have gotten a good deal on German shelf toilets>dead of summer, 110 degrees, in a fob in an alpine valley in nuristan and half the shitters AC condensers have frozen over >10 shit shelf toilets in a steel box, in use by 300 GIs who have eaten nothing but French toast sticks and Snickers Marathon bars for a week because the resupply mission can't get in >shitter trailer smells undescribably bad, like someone took a thousand shits on a flat top grill and covered them with burning caramel>There is no amount of flushing that actually clears the shelf and there are no toilet brushes, worse than the worst festival portajohn >end up shitting off of the old diving board over the pool we were using for a burn pit for the rest of the missionGermans are genuinely twisted people. If you're taking a proper shit it invariably hits the shelf and then backs up so it doesn't actually fall out of your fucking ass, you either pinch it off and it has a 50% chance of slapping your balls as it falls over, or you do this half standing shit maneuver to finish the shit. This, for some, represents a superior experience.>>530039066This guy gets it. Took me a while to realize you could just hug the tank which obviates having to stand up and shit, but then your nose is directly over the last ten guys' shit that never fully cleared off the shelf because FUCK THESE THINGS.
had to deal with this for one year in a rented flat, it really was a nightmare, me and gf would poop mostly when the other was outside
>>530037505>poop shelfTop kek
>>530037505just aim at the water. might have to get a little forward momentum going as it drops.
>>530037505It's so they can inspect the shit properly before decided whether to flush it. Germans love poo.
>>530037558Wtf did sir Harrington ever do to you? Did he confiscate your potatoes?
>>530037505I think the shelf is just a humiliation ritual for germans so they have to sift through their own shit and sit to pee.
>>530039274>He fell for the poopenshelf in der poopenfahrten scam
>>530039809Why?
>>530037505You want to be greeted by picrel?
>>530039894because of the stench of shit it wrought
>>530039951What kind of poops did you take (do you have picture ?)
>>530039690>>530039741>>530039786LmaoHow is this possible we let those people have a country...
>>530037505im dropping a fat log on my poopshelf as i type this
>>530039985as a matter of fact, i did take one pic when, apart from said poop, a pool of blood was shat, but the pic didn't survive until today
>>530040132Very nice.....
>>530039786Those must have been the "green" versions of the poop shelf toilet that use minimal water. An original Flachspüler, or a proper military-grade Flachspüler, has a mighty flush that washes away the waste like a tsunami once you're done inspecting it for parasites or occult.
>>530040014Je n'ai jamais vu ce type de toilette en France mec pourquoi les defends toi mdr
>>530039232What is it with Americans being so averse to cleaning?"I want to buy that toilet, I won't have to clean it.""Chop my sons foreskin off doctor so he won't have to clean it like me."
>>530037505NOW THIS LOOKS LIKE A THREAD FOR /BANT/
>>530037505damn thats acutally disgusting shit out of water fucking reeks so u have to scoop that shit in or somethingmaybe they have good water flushes but again germanys love scat porn sick fucks so it doesnt bother them
>>530040221Idk pal, they flushed with a lot of water but yeah. Maybe. At the end of the day for many kinds of shit (especially those brought on by a diet of MREs) the density and adhesive properties are too great for any hydraulic solution and manual methods are required.
>>530038841This gif convinced me. I am now poop shelf pilled.
I don't get the logistics of these toilets.So you shit. but then you have to wipe. So when exactly do you do the poopeninspekten? Do you do it between the shitting and the wiping? But then you gotta go up with your ass full of shit, and your ass cheeks spreading your shit around your buns like a bagel.Do you do it after shitting and wiping? But doesn't that clog the toilet, since you have to flush all the TP and the whole shit at once?Please enlighten me on your poopenstrategie, Deutschlandians.
>>530040258Cleaning is unproductive. While Americans are busy designing and building Nvidia graphics cards, Google, Meta, Apple ChatGPT and other products useless eaters like yurpoors use, you’re cleaning toilets and under your foreskins
>>530039690I bet she has large, dry shits. Only has to wipe once.
>>530039232The us toilet is a demon. I literally had the tip of my dick touch the toilet water. Also the high grease low fiber is diet makes you shit only liquid which reduces splashing.IBS Dicklets will never understand.
>>530040547maybe dont throw the paper on the shit?oh you are retarded commie i see
>>530040503>no visits from pooseidon
>>530039334>shartenshelfen
>>530040755>pooseidon
>>530039690wow, she's literally doing the IN GERMANY memeIN GERMANY VE HAVE ZE POOP SHELF TOILETZ
>>530037505no shit must be allowed to go to waste before being examined
>>530037505I have a schizo theory that these toilets are responsible for the greater prevalence of scat fetishes in Germany.
btw some of our commieblocks had poop shelf toilets in Communist Polandit's a sign of poverty/old people/communism hereso funny looking at germs claiming superiority
i shit you not there was a lefty bitch who was campaigning to save shelf toilets and give thirdies access to superior toilet technology and single issue voters voted her in
Ze mutt cannot comprehend ze German ingenuity and efficiency.
>>530038507Funnily enough colon cancer first visible sign is specks of blood on your shit for years with zero pain, it doesn't start to hurt until it's too late to treat or operate, having a goance at your shit from time to time to be sure everything is fine is too much for amerigolems I suppose.
>>530041041
>>530037505I had one of these when I stayed on rent for a year. At least you won't get splashed when you shit.
>>530041041Zat is reight.Wei wuld juu gif up ze Funkschen to inzpekt ze Puhp?Ohnly bikoz of ey littel smehl!Zat is nozing baht vänity, Kahmerad!
>>530040727what
>>530037505But how would you know how your diet is if you couldn't properly observe and sniff your shit?
>>530037505>>530038841Poop shelfs stink though, you just get blasted with the aroma of hot turd until you flush and get that fucker inundated with water. Far better to have an open water target area and sink the fucker immediately to quench the stench.
>>530041448exactly, you are so retarded that you literally dont know shit
>>530038621What the fuck is a dog going to do if it determines it's poop is unhealthy? Eat grass? Eat the turd and try again?
>>530041443...because you can shit on a plate, when you need to.Cheers, faggots!
>>530041551where the fuck else do you put the toilet paper you fucking retarded Jackoffslovakian mongoloid
>>530037505I don't think any of those have been installed in the 21st century.Still better than the American ones where can't sit down without your dick hanging in the water though.
>>530037505Poop shelf is for playing with shit. Grow up nigga everyone in europe does it. >>530038621But seriously what happened to European poop shelf toilets? Jews killed it, I've seen it everywhere as a kid, now there are only the plop poseidon kiss jew nigger toilets.Fuck do I have to worry about dirty toilet water splashing all over my ass and dick every time I take a shit. Probably increases uti infections too and jews profit.I am fecalophobe, but sometimes you gotta inspect your shit. There might be parasites, blood, anything but you can't do it anymore and jew nigger doctors have more power over you to keep you sick.I swear killing the poop shelf toilet is a deliberate jew attempt to further ruin our health.
Just have it move the poop to a viewing tank instead of having the doodoo out in the open.
>>530040547i wipe standing up and put one foot up on my sink
>>530042005like this? sure why not.
>>530041977Now this is some good old fashioned American ingenuity
>>530037505My grandfather used to have a toilet like that.. he was half german or smthing. God I love having nazi genes
>>530037505>you inspect your shit to see if you're sick instead of going to Doctor Goldstein to prescribe you SSRIs? WE DONT DO THAT IN AMERICAI haven't seen these since the 80s and even back then you'd encounter them only in homely Inns that were super oldthat said, you have to go back to muttland nobody wants or likes you here
>>530037505It's a mirror.
Yep. Krauts are fags for having those toilets. Who the fuck came up with that idea. You like shit smell? You like to clean shit with a brush? And for what reason? Because water splashed on your balls which happens maybe once a year at most. Retards.One of the few reasons I hate visiting Germany. Our toilets are normal.Versailles should have been harsher.
>>530038431>refugees>using toilets
>>530041148>an American was here>he's close
>>530037505I remember this meme back in the day. Apparently it's for Germans to visually inspect their shit before flushing.
>>530037505They'll claim it was to inspect for parasites but zero other cultures did this and germans are also known scat fetishists. They clearly just wanted to look at their shit.
what if we crossbred germans with indians?
>>530043146why would you visit germany?
>>530042341It reminds me of those special toilets we have in southern hemisphere embassies to make the toilet water flush counter-clockwise, as it does in America.
>>530039334>shartenshelfenlel
>>530043667As a Scandinavian you have to transit Germany anyway to go anywhere.
>>530040235Je parle des allemands. Désolé si je me suis mal fait comprendre.
>>530037505because the pipe is under the shelf. its a compact design. A shiter from a more civilized era of time.
Der Ploppenregal is quintessential for health awerness, therefore (((they))) killed it.Bring it back /pol/. If we all demand poop shelves and create a market demand for it then it will come back in no time.
>>530037505You are supposed to sit facing the wall and shit in that tiny hole, dumb mutt.
>>530037505its for the polaks, so they can have a snack when they clean the toilet
>>530039274Our "splashy" bowls allow us to inspect our turds. We may have trouble appreciating its full length but only rarely do I take a ghost-shit where it disappears.Further, the water will show how oily my turd is and help me determine if I have over-indulged. Not to mention, help hide the smell.
>>530038977>porn section at blockbusterOh fuck. I nearly forgot the embarrassment I caused my dad everytime he "forget" something and needed to stroll through the porn section again when i just wanted to rent mortal kombat for sega genesis because it had blood in it. "We get it dad. Huge boobs. Can we get out of here please? Mom ordered pizza and its weird that you stopped to talk to a coworker, again, in the titty aisle". Top kek. I get it now.
SAY THE LINE ORANGE NIGGER
>>530041812NOT ON THE SHIT IF YOU ARE SO EAGER TO LOOK AT IT
>>530040221>UPSIWUPSIE MEIN SCHEIẞE IST EIN BRATWURST BEKOMMEN
>>530046613im so fucking tired of winning bros
>>530040687>Also the high grease low fiber is diet makes you shit only liquid which reduces splashing.Have you ever been to the US for longer than two-three weeks? Their "food" will turn your stomach into a stone balloon. Last time i was in Florida it took me almost a week and a metric ton of laxatives to take a dump. I gave birth to a 5kg baby turd that clogged the toilet at Lago Mar hotel. I tried to flush twice and the bathroom flooded. Took my complimentary Evian and stayed at an airbnb for the next three days.
>>530046613You fags should have been the ones to do something about the mudshits but instead you opened your gaping assholes to them and sacrificed your women at the alter of guilt. Based USA coming to the rescue once again. You retards share a landmass with these fucking people and are so concerned about the sins of your fathers you cant see the threat on your doorstep. >inb4 my country is ran by jewsSo is yours. Youre still light years ahead of us in terms of the procedure that is removing our balls. Youre already a eunich.
>>530047158Skill issue.
