PREVIOUS >>ON PATROL: LIVE STARTS AT 9:00 PM ET AND ENDS AT MIDNIGHT (FRI/Sat)ON PATROL: FIRST SHIFT STARTS AT 8 PM ET FRI/SAT>Where the fuck is LIVE PD?GEORGE FLOYD TOOK THIS BIRTHRIGHT FROM YOUR PEOPLE. IT VALIANTLY RETURNS AS ON PATROL TO AWAKE THE MASSES TO THE NIGGER MENACE>Hurr Durr it's not actually liveTHERE CAN ONLY BE SO MANY TELEVISED MONKEY OUTBREAKS BEFORE PEOPLE WAKE UP.>Why is this on /pol/?LAW ENFORCEMENT IS THE MUSCLE BEHIND POLITICS.YOU'RE GODDAMNED RIGHT THIS IS RELEVANT.>What Channel?
>>530094633TYB and good evening anons
what's up niggers? got my red wine and ready to watch niggers do some nigging. I was watching goyslop the other day and saw dan had a cameo in zoolander 2
>>530094633>no big tiddy british milf mommy damn it
>First Shift updatesSticks, Rizzo, Curtis, and Christopher Coleman from Baton Rouge make a full houseColeman is there because he has a kid (?) doing a concert in NY so they invited him>Coleman pulled over a car with a passenger with a warrant for attempted second degree murderHe was surprised at the severity of the offense>Baton Rouge pulled over the tiny bikeLet him go with a warning since he had a helmet>Pronounciation of citiesDan said "Huber Heights" in IowaActually it's in Ohio, not Iowa, so some roastic emailed DanScreen showed Ohio as well>Programming noteOn Monday, Volusia cop get hit by a bulletBullet ricocheted off his body camera and maybe saved his life"Chitwood loves his guys" says Sticks
TYB, and good evening gentlemen. And fuck Sheriff Shitwood!
>>530095114Thanks for the updates anon
>>530095209careful bro, he's probably itt right now
>>530094633Hell yeah bros, whipped up my prize winning Vittles Vampagian for the big show.
Hey gang! Been a long time since I’ve tuned in for a show! Hey does anyone know if anything happened to the retarded cop from Nye county over a year ago who ran up on the homeowner & swung him through the window at the front of his house for no reason then literally blamed the homeowner. I always wonder what happened to that asshole
>>530095395looks pretty tasty fren. healthy?
Hey bros looks like some good pre show action already
where is everyone?
>>530096731I was just wondering the same, I think alot of anons are still unaware theres a pre show now.
>>530096731Live starts in 30 minutes, most don't show up until then.
>>530096895>webmkek it never gets old
>>530096731Bringin up the rear!
>>530095395Expertly plated as well I see.
>>530096895People wrecking on motorcycles will never not be funny
>>530097006I like it because it reminds me that we have warm weather shenanigans to look forward to
>>530097071>bloody bitch basterd flood fak you i rape you blady *gurgle gurgle* ACK
Oh shit we're back to the stinky vag doctor againI don't think I've seen her commercial in a while
>>530097557she was out with winter vagina
make this nigga play some twister
>>530096731waitin for the show to start
What is /opl/'s favorite Paralympic sport?The opening ceremony was today
>>530097988More legit than the real Olympics
>>530097988dunno...curling and figure skating already seemed like paralympics
>>530097557
Any chance we ever get a guest appearance by Donald Trump on an episode to give a play by play of the interactions? I feel like it would drive ratings through the roof!
>>530097557Are there really that many stinky women out there needing industrial grade deodorant?
>>530098704>diet of goyslop and coffee>fat>wear skin tight pants at all timesyeah it's a problem for sure
>>530098704Many women don't shower often because some beauty magazine used to run articles about how showering "Washes away essential skin oils" IIRC.
You know, some commercials are ok
HAPPY FRIDAY TO ALL MY GOOWOPS
>>530096731I'm here. I was working on my pizza. Nice fucking kitty.
Women drivers. Am I right, fellas?
arvo gentsslept in, it's rainy here>boomers who cant drivenot the best start
>>530098919the fuck
>>530099094hell yeah brother.... that's lookin' mighty fineI'll post my 'za once I retrieve it from the oven
Oh shit they let Curtis out of the dungeon
>>530099136Millennial foids are absolutely revolting.
>>530098704Women are either psychotic neat freaks or disgusting slobs. Ever been in a 16-40 year old woman’s car? Most are like Superfund sites
boomer is wasted
>>530099094based jalapeno on pizza enjoyer.how to make a brew combo:>salami>pepperoni >sausage>red onion>cashews>jalapenos it's fucking delicious fren
He's gonna blow!!!
>>530098874>>530098919truthplus they don't even know how to wipe after taking a shitthey're like babies and essentially wear diapers
>>530099307Well past wasted, he's blackout drunk.
>>530099307All the signs are thereFlushed face, slurred speech, sweating, and swayingAnd now he wants to chew some gum
>>530099080What's up goowop?I'm still working on my ages of empire 2 edit, on the original game it says 'The Age of Kings' and I was thinking of replacing it with 'The Guild of Goowop' what do you think about that? >>530099094Looks tasty. Did you try to make a homemade sauce this time around? Or is it a jarred sauce?
>what a dickLol
i predict 0.17
I believe in you gramps!
>>530099450I predict over 0.20
>>530099450>.150nice guess
>>530099314>>cashewsgod i forgot i was meant to try this
what a dick
>>530099420I dig the alliteration for sure
>>530099514damn that's a high range reading here
>>530099331yup. years ago i had a hot chick roommate who looked like natalie (((portman))). she wouldn't shower for like 4-5 days at a time and would just douse herself in perfume and deodorant. I can only imagine what her vag was like. think about this next time you're lusting over some dumb hot broad. she's probably as disgusting as an average 4chin user
>>530099610in the land of Oz, Bruce? I thought ya'll drank more Victoria Bitter than water
Probably better to do the fake blow so you don't get a refusal and it will buy you some time until you get back to the station
>>530099610What do you mean? High BAC for typical stops there? Its about average drunk here.
mutually assured tv destruction
>>530099716I was always told go for the blood test as it would take the absolute longest to get someone down to the station to do the draw
>>530099808Seems like the best advice is always not to consent to anything and never talk.
have this cop do a breath test
>>530099926Absolutely. You're fucked either way and going to jail. Don't let them know how fucked you are with a reading.
>>530099808In PA you don't get the choice of blood or station breath, its whatever is quicker for them. Also I know from experience time isn't always on your side.
>>530099808no you just dont do anything they ask you, periodalso they can extrapolate your previous BAC level based on the time difference since alcohol has a known metabolism rate so just delaying the test wont work
>Go to a police dinner>Get wasted>Try to drive awayI respect the balls on that man
>>530099808that sounds good until they find the thc or pills in your blood
>>530099630yeah... i'm not a simptardam well aware of how nasty chicks arethis bitch's ass stank up the room and she'd wear my gym shorts to bed which stank like her ass the next morning
>>530100091depends on when your last drink was. if you do a shot real quick before leaving the bar, time won't help you
>>530099420I still had half a jar of sauce in my freezer from last week, so I used it. I'll do the homemade soon though.
>at the end of the day>at the end of the day>at the end of the day>at the end of the day
>>530099314Cashews on pizza? Is that good?
>Breaks your shit too
>>530099714>I thought ya'll drank more Victoria Bitter than wateryou're thinking of abbos>>530099719>What do you mean?0.05-0.15 is normal drunkgreater than 0.15 is high range so penalties increase and you can also get 9 months inside
>>530100343yup. flavor isn't too overpowering and adds a nice crunchy texture. i add them into omelets n sheeit too
he used the word "therefore" so he obviously won the argumentcase closed... begone officers!
This engineer reminds me of the chomo that refused to register this week on /lpbg/
>>530100441For pizza, do you use them whole, half or crushed?
>>530100478He a smart nigga!
>>530100496now that's a good onelove me some prator and cheryl
>>530100425Its like that here too, I blew like a .32 for my DUI and lucky I got into the diversion/probation program otherwise I'd have been locked up for at least a weekend.
>>530100280The way they repeat the same thing over and over drives me fucking nuts
>>530100497i just use whole because i'm lazy and buy them that way and i like them. if you're unsure about it, maybe go with halved
>>530100637>FO WHAT>FO WHAT>FO WHAT>FO WHAT>FO WHAT
>>530100595Draw anon was doing a vidya series and I stole them. I agree they are very good.
>>530100101I promise you there are at least a dozen people at this ball, including cops, who will be driving home over the legal limit. The fact that this guy had the cops called on him suggests he was a total asshole and/or extremely drunk.
Now he resistin.
here is tonight's (frozen) pieit was BOGO $10 at Sprouts
Anyone else hate that boomer sheriff from Minnesota who goes live on YouTube. He is in total denial of how bad things really are in his state while he shows up to gas stations at midnight full of niggers hanging out doing drugs, then jokes around with them and hands out Twinkies like shit is fine n dandy
Who could have seen this turn of events?Absolutely shocking.
>>530100886yeah fuck that guy. i knew he was full of shit when he referred to george floyd overdosing as "the murder" of george floyd. 80 year old boomer fuck thinks black people are cute while they destroy his city and country.
>>530100911>Sounds of Dan heavily signing
>now arrested>was invited to leave by the police 4 minutes agoniggers
>>530100840that looks aigh't brudda.
>freedom t-shirt>detained and arrested
>>530100840would
Just getting in, did I miss anything good?
100 posts a half hour in, did ourguy shoot another future astronaut
>>530101059
how embarassing
>>530101123>boomer showed up to a police dinner>drank heavily>tried driving off
He doesn't speak English?
>>530101123A certain couple of comely Richland County cops showed butthole.
Boobies
Officer Infowars draws down!
>i was in my drawers in bed
>not even on duty>in drawers in bed>still makes it as the chase is endingreally loves his job
>>530101192dan abrams actually shouted us out on the show live so be nice to the newfags
>>530100840>FILLED CRUSTSESESSSSget filled son
>>530101421>About to plap mah ole lady
>I gotta shit BAAAAD BAD BAD BAD
>CODE BROWN
>I jus hava doodoo, baby. Das eet!
does the car smell like doo doo? no? then you're lyin.
Nobody capped those stuffed plushy boobies?
>>530101380he don't fuck around with them type
I used to be able to hold in my bowel movements indefinitely. Now, I’ve got about five minutes to find a toilet it it’s all over.
>>530101646Ya gotta work on your breathing
>>530101192Killing niggers is always good no cap just cap niggers
>>530101608
should i turn this shit on or not?nothing else on really... i will dual watch an old stream from 2014-2016 and OPL as i eat fast food trash
>>530101728Thanks anon, I thought everyone missed it and /opl/ was truly dead
>>530101646So you're over 40
>bayou shrimp bowlthey're gonna be frozen indian shrimp
>>530101818ASS CANCER
>>530101788Checked best seasons
>>530101646stop letting your bf fuck your asshole and you wont have this problem
>>530101818Not for a little while. It seemed to happen more frequently on long distance runs.
>I gotta doodoo>Senokat commercial Dans OPL show is a just a vehicle to sell shit.
>>530101932you all better get scoped out for ass cancer
>dan seething at his irrelevance
Left or right?
>cop flirting with high schoolers on the tax payer dime
>>530101991there are a lot of boomers that watch this religiously
This cop really thinks he’s going to pick up these teenagers lmao
>>530102051Left
>>530101728enhanced
>and they stay the same age
>>530102051both at the same time
>>530102051>fat with zero fuckin titswhat an embarrassment get the fuck out of my vision
This cop gonna get some?>>530102051>Left or right?Kind of a tie for me.
>>530101728
>>530102107
Do da dooty
>oh you have to shit so we'll let you keep driving without a license
>>530101977Some guys get soft in their 30's.
I don't understand a word this chris rock cop says.
this nigger sanging a drunk poop song
>>530101932I swear everyone on this site is a closeted homo which is why they assume everyone is penetrating their anus.
>>530100595I really like this 'sassy sheryl' when she had on her red glasses. They made the mistake of letting Pete chair the board and he spent the day sneaking snacks.>>530100728>vidya seriesWhat's your favorite vidya game anon?
he drinking a pint of crown and they let him go???
>>530102169>Kind of a tie for me.Yeah I really can't decide which one I like more
>>530101977you got crohn'swelcome to hellyou will die an extremely painful ball splattering death soon without invasive surgery
>>530102242The guy at HQ who handles the beeps never is able to beep whenever the woman cop speaks. She's constantly cursing and they never beep it out.>Ok you're free to go, go shitOr pic rel she got onto this minibike and said:>how dis shit work?
>>530102274I literally went back and forth between cheryl and sheryl off memory.... Got it wrong
>>530102287That wasn’t crown royal but some other cheap as fuck brown liquor that will give you the type of hangover nightmares are made of
i don't get why someone would rent their car out on Turo. they just get used for crimes
>>530102051Right is giving him the fuck me eyes.
>>530102432>cheryl and sheryl
>>530096731I just came homeI was with some friends at Chilli'sMostly because I saw picture related a few days agoI'll have to stay late after midnight to see the beginning
Can't they just go ask who had the care before?
>>530102518indeed. poor investigative work.
>assault warrant Step out and put your hands behind your back.
>>530102502>not checking for shit paper before you even drop youe pants
>>530102518I think she's the next renter of that Lexus through Turo, not the owner of the car. She as the customer wouldn't have that info.
>>530102428shit isn't a word they bleep on reelz
>>530102601I didn't mean they should ask her, I meant they should go ask whoever handles the renting
>>530102437ah yeah.. im glad i stopped drinking bottom shelf plastic bottle garbage.... one of my worst hangovers i was fuckin shaking like a lead, face down on my cot....both my hamstrings were cramping majorly and i couldn't move as i noticed i shit myself in my sleep...laying there in shit, fucked up legs, shaking, dizzy, sweats and headache
>>530102742He said they were going to
>>530102663It's cable not broadcast.
>I just have an assault warrant that’s it>I just have a few ounces of weed that’s itI just axed for you license, bruh
>>530094633it's probably not actually live so they can delete the footage when they have to shoot niggers in the head
I hate Cinnamon Toast Crunch and I remember in school for breakfast all the niggers would eat Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal like it was their favorite thing ever…
>i know my rights>i got money to sue y'all
>>530103021
>>530103021Yeah. it's at least a 30 minute delay.
>>530103095You don' season yo Crunch?
Come on, start fighting while cuffed
He wants his one free phone call, Dan.
>>530103095It's not real cinnamon, toast or crunch. Then again they drink little antifreeze jugs of not real juice.
>>530103095>In school for breakfastYou were in a low income school.
>>530103235No nigger if you got to school early you had to sit in the cafeteria
i don't think they can even charge dui if the van never went on the street lol
>>530103095all that cereal burnt a hole in my gutsi think it was extremely acidicand the way it's processed doesn't even seem absorbable...just completely fake food with sugar and some trace mineral/vitamins added
Need a ambalamps
BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP BACK UP
CHIMPCON 1
Been awhile since a decent chimpout.
gawd damn
3 more victims of white supremacy
>>530103374i puked the living fuck out of cheerios it got a certain way down... then my body rejected it all... i remember that cos it burnt my guts for 12 fuckin hours
>Dominos
Who need they incident updated?
dead nigger ugh dan your in big trouble buddy
F… Dey dead
I can't believe this could happen just a week after 225 festival.
>>530103574nah it was a black shooter
>man up man up nigga stay stillt. Nigger shot in the ankle
>>530103524Do you have any chronic digestion or gi issues?
>>530103602He could have been aiming at someone else.
DAYUUUM
>>530103661yeah, severecrohn's
;_;
>>530103537>donminos>obamna
>>530103778sounded like that guy got paralyzed
>>530103760Man up nigga drink some Metamucil
Lady cop got a big ole booty
>>530103760jew detected
>>530103849don't need it
Hey opl...
>>530104087What is the relief for crohns?
>>530104061apologize
only a nigger would fuck that
No fucking way
>>530104417surgery
>>530104453What about plapjak?
holy toledo
>>530104453tit to gut ratio is busted for sure
>>530104417sweet death
>>530103760>tfw flex sig on Monday
>>530104550Definitely out of spec
>>530104544her pet nigger took a shot at the car, that's why they fled
>>530104506>What about plapjak?i figured he'd thought about what his life had become and did the needful
can't even smoke some crack without making a scene
Why isn't the cop punching these cunts?
Crackhead Massholes are the worst. Should be legal to just ventilate.
The fatass driver should spend at least a year in jail
>>530104910They should both spend the rest of their lives in prison
>>530104892>>530104910Would have been a good shoot on both of them
>>530104995But what about the guy in the back seat? Big questions.
reminder, sexual side effects or suicidal ideation WERE NOT COMMON
A'ight, listen up, I'm tryna get some answers 'bout this mess from way back with this Nye County cop and some dude just chillin' in his crib. This cop, without no rhyme or reason, goes and beats on this homeowner, leavin' 'em all messed up. Then, this fool tries to play it off like the homeowner started it.I know these things don't move fast, and I ain't here to start no beef, but for real, there ain't nothin' out there about what happened after. We need that real talk on police actions to keep the trust and make sure these cats are checked. So, can you give me the lowdown on what's been goin' down? Any probes, any slap on the wrist for the cop? I'd love to know how this whole situation got squared away.
>>530105105Looks like he played the kidnapping victim card.
>>530105113I love taking screenshots of medical disclaimers. I'm pretty sure this is for some kind of medication for 'moderate to severe' dandruff. They usually play the advertisement in the last half hour of the show.
>>530105247Start emailing Bobby Kennedy and get him to make pharma advertising illegal
HE'S SCARED
>>530105247I think its because poor depressed people join the clinical trials to be lab rats for a $200 vanilla visa.
>>530105499Or their bullshit medication just has all kinds of side effects depending on the person who takes it
>threatens to kill his neighbors multiple times>has crashed his van into their home after multiple violent acts>Anti-cop>SWAT won't come>Monitoring the situation and see if the family wants to leave their home out of fear of being slaughtered by a psychoPeak example of why so many people say the cops aren't worth a shit.No one will help you when your life is in danger.
this guy uses reddit
>reddit confirmed
Why the fuck do people come out of their cars with shit in their hands in a situation like this
>>530105647he's a reddit mod
>>530105740>Inside of you are two wolves>Both of them are gay
>>530105740Looks like a FtM. See how tiny the body is?
>>530105647I was about to say. FFS telling the cops "just don't do anything stupid".Oh shit, he called his car in stolen and now he's driving it?
>>530105740>you have violated our community terms of service or whatever the fuck they say. i've been banned so many times you'd think i'd have it memorized
They sound sexy, show their faces.
>>530105582it's because anything a person reports experiencing during trials has to be considered a side effect no matter if it is or notthat's why every medication lists depression or suicidal ideation as a side effect
>>530105247do people not have suicidal thoughts at some point in their life?
>>530105803Good catch. That would explain how wrong this individual got the interaction with the cops too - no concept of being a potential threat
>>530105957>47 hereneverbut my life seems to be much better than everyone around meor it's just that I'm more pleased with my life than other people around mealso, I miss Nye county
>>530105957>do people not have suicidal thoughts at some point in their life?no, mine are mostly genocidal
>>530105934hmm i should start joining trials and tell them the medication makes me hate jews and niggers
ITCHY, FLAKEY, PLAQUEY
>nigger-hating headache
>>530105247Ah it was for psoriasis.>Oh no I accidentally said the 'n-word' during karaoke with my co-workers>I'm going to kill myself
BOOTY ANGLE
if he was asleep he isn't now with how loud they're being
Who's got command point in this incident?
>>530106262>participant reported increased pattern recognition and mental clarity
>>530106389
Trackstar is by far the coolest nog officer on this show
>>530106724I certainly hope you have been doing your progrumz
I don't think her pussy pass is valid
What a neat freak.
he pissed in the wendy's cup
>>530106893
Anons be honest, how many of you are watching from rooms that look just like this?
>>530106979It's that Frank Thomas test pill commercial
>>530107000i'm in a beach front condo with a nice fire going binge drinking wine. my future, however, will probably look pretty similar
>>530107000Not a chance.
>>530107000I wish I had a cool deers head on my wall.
>>530107000checked and none of your business.
>>530107000Even at my worst, which was when I lived with an absolute slob in college, it wasn’t half this bad.
>>530107000my bedroom is like that but I don't have tv in there
>>530107229>none of your businesshoarder confirmed
>brooke burkestill would. so much fapping was done to E!
I may be face autistic, but is this the same nigga who crashed his car from a few months ago? I can't get a look at his face yet but it's the same city.
oh no not the hyabusa
>>530107462Hell yeah those were the days, spanking it to sloots dancing on wild on
she's all hopped up on tea
>>530107508yup. i always thought i would end up in those places with those sloots. boy was i wrong
>waman never grow up and still wear tiara and sash's or whatever they're called
>>530107000What's he watching on TV?>>530106829Yes, I've been doing my programz; hope you are too.
bitch is drunk and ready to fuck and everybody in town knows it.
>what's a foo bar?
intoximicated is dat other nigga
>>530107579I just remember being so excited as a teen, thinking that it would only be a matter of time before I actually had regular sex and a healthy romantic relationships. Next life, I guess.
>>530107698>What's he watching on TV?i think it was something with shaquille oneal
the light gon shine
>I said you dun understandddd
>>530107486>Rich nigga county >Star of David wheelsKek, it's the little details to takes the drawing over the clive.
inspirational message>>530107880
new bread >>530107993>530107993
HEY DANNY!
>>530107860kek yup. >alright, entering high school. i'll definitely get some boob soon>ok junior year, maybe i'll get a cute sophmore gf>alright senior year, this is it. probably get laid at prom>ok well surely i'll slay the puss in college >finally lose virginity at the tail end of 19 to a fat chick >wait, aren't I supposed to be in ibiza right now? >THE VENGABOYS LIED TO ME!
>>530107870>i think it was something with shaquille onealHe's a big guy>>530107940Glad you like it. Richnigga county seems to have a lot of high speed driving violations.
