The year is 1999 and Eric Bishoff has just been fired from WCW. Instead of Turner calling Vince Russo they call (you), a time-travelling peedubya poster. With the benefit of 26 years of hindsight how would (you) save WCW, anon?
>>19448949first they have to introduce me, a time traveling aew fan, to stan hansen. then I'll save their dying fed simply by booking the opposite of everything russo did.
>>19448949Id beat the shit out of whatever all time warner execs were selling my company under the table for a dollar.
>>19448949Here’s my plan:1. **Rebrand WCW as “WCW: The Pride of Wrestling”** — because nothing says “main event” like a rainbow-colored logo shining brighter than the sun. Make every wrestler’s gimmick a celebration of diversity! Hulk Hogan? Now “The Macho Marvel,” promoting acceptance and smashing stereotypes with a giant rainbow hammer.2. **Create a “Gay for the Gold” Tournament** — featuring wrestlers from all over the spectrum, with hilarious monikers like “The Glitter Gladiator,” “Captain Queer,” and “Sashay Slammer.” The finals? A fabulous dance-off, judged by RuPaul himself via satellite.3. **Introduce “The Homosexual Hotline” segment** — where fans call in with questions about wrestling, sexuality, and life, hosted by a flamboyantly charismatic announcer in feather boas and sequined tuxedos. The callers? A parade of colorful characters, breaking down stereotypes with humor and love.4. **Have a heel turn for “The American Dream,” Dusty Rhodes** — but instead of traditional promos, he delivers heartfelt speeches about acceptance, love, and wrestling with a rainbow flag waving behind him. It’s emotional, fabulous, and totally unexpected.5. **Make “The Lesbian Lariat” a signature move** — where a wrestler gently, yet fiercely, whips their opponent with a rainbow-colored lariat, symbolizing the power of love and unity in the squared circle.6. **Host “WCW: Drag Championship”** — with wrestlers competing in elaborate, campy drag personas, complete with boas, heels, and glitter. The audience? Loving it, and the ratings skyrocket as the world witnesses the most fabulous wrestling extravaganza ever.7. **End the show with a giant pride parade** — a parade of wrestlers, fans, and staff marching through the arena, holding rainbow banners, singing “We Are Family,” and celebrating the beautiful spectrum of humanity.
>>19449042chatgpt slop
>>19449042my plan is to trick this guy into doing the blue blazer gimmick and then cutting the rope.
>>19448949Booker T,Stevie Ray,Jacqueline,The Cat,M.I Smooth (yeah),roddy piper in facepaint and Mabel shoot rape Kevin Nash for 40 minutes during starcadeScott Steiner wears blackface and calls kevin raped bitch
>>19448949>make Stacy Keibler wrestle nakedThereProblem solved
>>19448963/thread
>>19448949There's nothing foreseeable that I could do that would stop WCW from getting scrapped by the merger, so I would have some fun booking some wrestling, whilst doing everything in my power to enrich myself and my family. Every thing from giving my mom and dad multi year multi million dollar contracts to selling bootleg t-shirts in the parking lot. I am milking this shit backwards and forwards to make my future brighter.>>19449042Homosexual Hotline would have drawn thoughever.
>>19449659>stick fighting
hire john cena, suggest he adopts a rapping gimmick and shove a rocket up his ass
>>19448949Renegotiate the contracts. Especially the merchandise contracts.
Build the company around Tank Abbott
>>19448949Go with Bischoff's initial plan for the revival at first and then start going crazy with the storylines to generate attention. Also, I'd put WCW on syndication just to get the promotion some exposure on local stations nationwide after the Big Bang PPV and on a cable TV channel with the weekly show later being simulcasted online after a few years. Also booking smaller venues like what ECW did back in the day starting with the Las Vegas residency.
I'd hire New Jack and tell him Paul Levesque called him a nigger, so he would go to a Raw show and stab him to death.Maybe I can't save WCW but i will save professional wrestling.
>>19449820>not wanting to see 20 year old Stacy Keibler nudeWhy are you gay?
>>19450081>I'd hire New JackIf you get him early enough, this would be before the incident with Grimes that fucked him up for the rest of his life. In fact, if you can dig up evidence of Vince funding ECW and bring it to the ECW boys, you could clean house and bring most of them on.
>>19450089Standards and practices would eviscerate any of the good shit ECW ever did
>>19450091that is if they never realized what the Mass Transit incident is (though that's partially on the kid's fault for lying about his age)
>>19448949If I was a time traveler that retained my knowledge future events? I would fire all the dead weight dimeless shitters like Kwee Wee and Disco Inferno and sign Brock Lesnar, Dave Batista, John Cena, Randy Orton, Samoa Joe, CM Punk, Bryan Danielson and every future main event draw I know of even if they were young and green. I'd build them in the midcard until they were over and eventually weed out guys like Goldberg and Nash until I had a new cast of fresh faces as main enters. Then I'd just rip off successful storylines from other promotions from 2000s until now and become known as the greatest booker of all time. Still no bitches though.
>>19448949Realize WWF won and play from thereRipoff New Blood, but do it two years earlier. Nash never holds a title again, not even tag gold. Hogan is told to fuck offForce Hall to get clean at gunpointNWO vs Wolfpac happens, wolfpac wins, gets killed by New BloodGoldberg is treated a looming threat at any moment, but gets 1 more title run, that's itLet Flair go to WWFSid, DDP, Steiner, Sober Scott, Sober Sting and Booker are your big namesDo everything possible to keep Jericho, Benoit, Malenko, Guerrero and SaturnLet Jeff Jarrett do his thing but don't push him to the moonGo all in on actual wrestling content, let WWF chase crash tv shit that will eventually wind downRelocate WCW HQ to VegasDo all I can to get WCW and UFC to link up
Honestly I don't think you'd even need to do anything, just prevent Goldberg's streak from being shit on and prevent the Fingerpoke of Doom from ever happening, and tell Bischoff to NOT fucking leak Raw and focus on the fucking show. Do all that and just book sensibily and WCW magically stays around. It's not hard.
Try and convince Ted Turner to leave WCW out of the merger. Show him evidence from the future so that he knows you're telling the truth. That's the only way WCW survives. The corporate merger was the real cause of its death, everything else was just extra weight on a sinking ship. On the other hand, if Ted maintains private ownership of WCW, it would probably still be around today.
