Memories of Earth (Sonny - Aftermath 1) https://youtu.be/XxIr_gXszgMIn the blue hour, in a field of gently swaying grass, an old man stood, listening quietly to the cicadas screaming for pussy. He smiled at the thought. Insects were very amusing creatures and it was their music which gave voice to heat and the evening. A cool breeze blew and it felt good against his weathered face. The old man was not used to such a peaceful, tranquil atmosphere. For the moment, he felt as if he were... safe? Yes, safe. For the first time in a very, very long time.He closed his eye. He could imagine being there, in his old hometown, walking through the streets and the places he grew up in. Another time, another place, like a memory adrift in a sea of grass and eternity and the sounds of an eternal American summer. But this was all... A fabrication. And actually, so was this entire scene. Zoos, after all, are the built realization of man's favorite illusion: control over nature.The old man's jaw clenched. He sighed a really deep and disappointed sigh out of simultaneous shame and frustration. Tilting his head upwards, he saw the shimmering of the light panels across the vast dome of the sky as it touched the earth. Under his feet, he could feel the subtle rumbling of hidden machines working tirelessly. Through his bones, weather generators blew colder than a moment they did before. None such detail would escape him, nothing ever did.The inhabitants of the zoo could never comprehend the engineering and human imagination invested in this place, but it was the old man's awareness of these things which damned him. He was too old and too jaded, too far in his Fallen state to partake in the ignorant bliss as much as he could receive the Heavenly grace. Something old, dark, and chthonic gnawed at his heart which was treacherous and full of deceit and the taste was bitter, bitter.He simply could not go home again. It was quite impossible. Memories of clear skies had already faded away.Gently shaking off the dust from his feet, the Arm of the City stepped into the cabin of his personal car and bade its return to the Seed known as White Sands. The engines shuddered as the shuttlecraft took off from the orbital station and burned through the night. His right hand man had given him an all-day pass to the Metazoo with only the best of intentions, but alas, alack, such a gift was wasted on the likes of him. He hadn't even seen a single stupid animal or Pokémon during his entire visit, what a fucking ripoff.Even though he shouldn't, the old man was going to have some very harsh words with his friend when he came back home.And on the planet of SUNROSE below, a completely different and totally unrelated story is taking place...
>>6309237>AIM FOR THE NADSYou see your Gardevoir laying there on the floor with his head caved in, the gas masked man kicking at his body, and suddenly everything you think is gone in a surge of sheer murderous hatred. You take off into a sprint, leap over the fallen Pokémon, and ram your shoulder into the gas masked banker like a Mack truck! He stumbles back from the momentum of the blow and you press the advantage by getting in close, preventing from swinging that bat around. You aggressively grip his arms with one hand and start throwing straight jabs right into the center of his stupid face and it feels GOOD. The banker lets go of the bat — a fatal mistake! — and starts clawing at your face and eyes with his gloved hands. An inhuman, animal screech erupts from your throat, more out of anger than pain, as he draws blood. Still, you continue beating the shit out of him.The debtor breaks free just as you throw a mean right hook, leaving you stumbling, and he tries to throw himself to the side, but you turn quickly, raise your leg, and kick the rat fucking bastard right in the balls before he can fully escape. The guy lets out a choked scream of pain as he convulses on the floor and you kick and stomp on him again and again in the groin for good measure. Somehow, without you even knowing when you snatched it up, the bat is already in your hands. Your grip turns white around the handle. You literally see nothing but red as blood drips down your face. You stand over him and for a split moment, you see the frantic lights of his eyes shining behind the lenses of his mask. You grit your teeth and down comes the bat, with crushing force! One— TWHACK— two —THWACK— three!CRUNCHBefore you can try for a fourth, a pair of very big claws slips under your armpits and are placed behind your neck, forcing your head downwards in a full nelson hold. You are forcibly dragged backwards by the larger, man-sized Pokémon and choke as your struggle against its grip."JESUS CHRIST, DAN!" The muffled, helium-pitched voice of your gas masked employer comes running up from behind. Mr. Foster, with a now bent pipe in his hand, looks at the crumpled mask and broken body of his wayward colleague and bends down to check for a pulse. A tense moment passes. Then, Mr. Foster lets out a low breath and stands up slowly. "Christ, Dan, this bloke owes me money, not his life." >Dan defeated Mr. Costner!>Hrkk glrkk... fnnnghkhgn...>You don't get anything for winning...
>>6309245Mr. Costner's Shop (Mezzanine Stairs - Questionable Victory) https://youtu.be/ojD4qbdQZZsYou are GARCIAN SMITH and your head is killing you all over again.Your eyes open slowly to find yourself seated at someone else's dining room table and someone shaking your arm. You rub your head and mumble and groan to yourself from the lingering pain.This isn't the morning's earlier hangover, this is a concussion you got from some jerk bashing in your head with a baseball bat. Judging from how badly he hit you and the dull ringing in your ears, the bastard somehow hit you with a full swing of Dark type energy. Man, there are too many fucking Dark types on SUNROSE."Garcian, Garcian. Okay, he's awake." Dan stops shaking you. There's drying blood on his face and glasses, but you can tell from the size and Dan's alertness that it's only a surface wound. "How do you feel, man?"You stare at Dan and mentally project to him the first words that come to your mind:<Пoмню, жив, нe yмиpaю.>Dan stares at you blankly. You stare at him blankly.<So, did we get him?> you say much more simply."Hell yeah, brother." Dan points his thumb over his shoulder and you see the gas mask guy who hit you slumped over in the corner. Next to him is Mr. Roster, the giant... Uh... Hm. The giant biped Pokémon has long claws and a long snout, and is covered in a weird robe of sorts. His pale head and lens-like eyes reminds you of his owner — you can't read his mind or sense any emotions, which marks him as a Dark-typed fellow just like his owner and his own telekill-lined gas mask.Okay, so you don't know what species this guy is. Fine. Anyway, Mr. Roster is standing next to the baseball guy with his hands politely clasped together. You take another look at the jerk on the floor and wow, he looks really fucked up! The sight of him collapsed on the ground instantly cheers you up and makes you feel less like a guy who got knocked out. <Crazy party huh?> You try cracking a joke, but Dan is already talking to Mr. Foster seriously."Well, you got what you paid for. I don't think this guy's going to ever cross you again." Dan holds out his hand. "Pay me.""No bloody way, pal."Dan's expression doesn't change but he keeps his hand out. In fact, his entire body freezes up and you tense, because that means he's about to start fucking fuming. You know Dan better than anyone else so you hurriedly gesture to Mr. Foster, knowing that your limited telepathy won't work on through the Dark type equipment."I appreciate your contribution," Mr. Foster hisses out, which would be more intimidating if his voice wasn't so high pitched. "But I'm not paying you wankers to make waves here. You two aren't seeing a single dollar until we get through our full list of targets. We've got two more people on the list, now fall in and follow my lead."
>>6309254DAN & GARCIAN>Steal the debtor's wallet. (Roll 1d10000, one anon.)>Start looting the shop for any inventory. (Write in things to look for. Roll 3d100, three anons.)>Eh, who cares about human business? You're hungry. Get something to eat from the fridge.>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?">"Between you, me, and him, we should call for a medic." <We have the money for one?> "Yessss..?">"Hey, fuck you, pay me." (Escalate.)>Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)>Switch to Dan's PoV.>WRITE IN.INFORMATIONDAN STATUS: Very Lightly InjuredGARCIAN STATUS: ConcussedDEBT: 22,000 Poké/220 USDOWNED: 110 USD (TO DO: get your dosh exchanged for Poké because the Landlord is a fucking asshole and only accepts the Poké as legal tender.)CURRENT EMPLOYEMENT: Goon Squad under Mr. Foster; intimidate three bankers and/or people indebted to Mr. Foster as per your agreement.FORMAT EDIT
>>6309260>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?">Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)
>>6309281>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?">Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)Oh shit we're back
>>6309260GARCIAN>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?"DAN>Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)On the way out>Steal the debtor's wallet. (Roll 1d10000, one anon.)Welcome back, QM! I'm glad to see you taking another crack at this.
>>6309260>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?">Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)Let's remember to MAIM and NOT KILL. Go for crippling and that's it
>>6309260>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?">Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)Happy to see this back. Someone even bothered to archive the first threadhttps://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/2025/6230311/
>>6309260>Let's just get the next guy. Who's he? (Next scene.)
<Hey, hey, easy man. Be cool. He's got our money. Don't fuck this up.> You stare intently at the side of Dan's head, trying to literally will him into calming down over the money. (It's the least you can do with your even more limited psychic potential. Anything stronger than a Confusion is just asking for a pulse-pounding headache and a bad time. There was this time you tried a full blast Psywave at your shift supervisor but then—)This fucking contractor shit back in cargo... Dan's thoughts simmer and seethe beneath his expressionless look, but he manages to put a lid on it after a long pause. He breathes out slowly, relaxing at last. He's gonna be fine.>"Hey, weren't there two other Pokémon or something? What happened to them?"Dan turns the conversation to different matters. Mr. Foster has already stood up and is currently checking on the fallen banker since you started "talking" to your brother. He turns his head and there's a glint of wicked light in the darkened lenses of his mask."Pfffttt, ha ha ha." Mr. Foster stands back up again and starts gesturing animatedly with his length of bent pipe. "Spies, bloody useless! I knew that lizard cunt was going to try and circle around for a backstab with his barb, all sneaky beaky like, so my partner here flushed him out with a nice and toasty Fire Spin. Invisibility and that Keclokeon trick with the shed skin does piss all when he keeps being lit on fire."Dan nods slowly and appreciatively with his arms crossed, vividly recreating the violent scene in his mind. You really missed out on a lot when you got knocked out.Mr. Foster makes crawling motions with his hands. "Lil bugger tried to come at me next, but then I jabbed at him like this" —he suddenly snaps his pipe hand upwards, like a duelist flicking his rapier (and you warily note the sudden burst of Dark-type energy at the tip)— "And down he goes! 'S like catching rats, you get better at killing rats every time one tries to put a hit on you."Your employer raises a hand to his face and sniggers nastily through his elephant-like gas mask at his personal joke. "Now, the other gemmy bloke stalled a bit too hard. Didn't move a finger even after Mr. Roster here lit him up like a fag."Mr. Roster lets out a noise that goes "graaaooohhhh" and lets out a puff of flame, clearly pleased with himself. For a 'mon in a mask, the walking flamethrower somewhat manages to look awfully smug."And that's the end of that. Any questions, children?""Nope." You look at Dan, then shake your head for a "no" as well. Your employer puffs out his chest, happy that you two gave him your ears.
>"Let's just get the next guy. Who's he?"Mr. Foster takes out a photo and begins explaining the next person on the list... (CHOOSE ONE.)>A Pokémon professor (you know she's one from the cool labcoat and her cute partner Litwick). She seems to be a clone judging from the white hair covering her eyes. "Owes me quite a bit for her research grants and she's been late for a little more than a week. Bit unusual, come to think of it.">Some kind of... crobat girl??? She's even got little bat ears in her purple hair. Looks like a flying ace type of trainer with those googles. What the Hell. "I hope you plonkers aren't afraid of heights." >Mr. Foster takes out a robot parts catalog, a business card, and, for some reason, a Plug and Play porno mag... "For official business, we'll need to visit the robot collector. Bit of a queer duck, this one...">A really generic looking guy. He seems happy next to his cute smiling tomboyish wife. Dude looks like he's achieved the American dream. "I've got no real beef with him, but he owes me money so we need to beat his face into ground meat.">WRITE IN."Say... I think you blokes are real tight. You can have a little robbery, as a treat.">Please roll 1d10000 for the wallet.>Please roll 2d100, two anons, for the robbery.>Write in particular items to look for in the store inventory.
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6309832>A Pokémon professor (you know she's one from the cool labcoat and her cute partner Litwick). She seems to be a clone judging from the white hair covering her eyes. "Owes me quite a bit for her research grants and she's been late for a little more than a week. Bit unusual, come to think of it."And rollllinnn....
Rolled 2898 (1d10000)>>6309832>A Pokémon professor (you know she's one from the cool labcoat and her cute partner Litwick). She seems to be a clone judging from the white hair covering her eyes. "Owes me quite a bit for her research grants and she's been late for a little more than a week. Bit unusual, come to think of it."I sense an opportunity for LORE, maybe about all these weird variant-type future space Pokemon.As fr inventory, I'll leave that to the anons rolling for robbery; I'll do the wallet.
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6309832>>A Pokémon professor (you know she's one from the cool labcoat and her cute partner Litwick). She seems to be a clone judging from the white hair covering her eyes. "Owes me quite a bit for her research grants and she's been late for a little more than a week. Bit unusual, come to think of it."sounds cool>Write in particular items to look for in the store inventory.>TMsGarcian needs real moves and coverage
>>6309834>>6309838Oh yea, inventory. I'll second this anon, maybe a healing item or two as well since we could probably use those
>>6309832>Some kind of... crobat girl??? She's even got little bat ears in her purple hair. Looks like a flying ace type of trainer with those googles. What the Hell. "I hope you plonkers aren't afraid of heights.">INVENTORY: TMs. Maybe a rare candy or two as a TREAT.
>>6309832>A Pokémon professor (you know she's one from the cool labcoat and her cute partner Litwick). She seems to be a clone judging from the white hair covering her eyes. "Owes me quite a bit for her research grants and she's been late for a little more than a week. Bit unusual, come to think of it."AND>Write in particular items to look for in the store inventory.TM primarily. I wouldn't say no to a Rare Candy but if that's too fucking rare or hard to come by here then just a TM or two is fine
Rolled 61, 75 = 136 (2d100)>>6309832>Mr. Foster takes out a robot parts catalog, a business card, and, for some reason, a Plug and Play porno mag... "For official business, we'll need to visit the robot collector. Bit of a queer duck, this one...">>6309834He said 2d100 bro
"She's pretty." <Yeah.> When it comes to the men of wo, you and Dan are of one mind."Pretty, but dumb," Mr. Foster puts the photo of the woman away. "This lass Beefwood got a signed and stamped kill on sight order from the rest of the scientific community, courtsey of those sodomites and weasels in the assassin's guild. First thing she does when she comes planetside is take out a loan (from me) to a tidy sum of ten thousand dollars."Mr. Foster waves a finger, like a wise man pointing out the fine moral lesson at the end of the day or episode. "That, my friends, is why eggheads don't run the world. All their science magic bullshit and none of them have figured out how to keep the lights on in their poncy little laboratories.""That's pretty dumb." <Yeah.> That seems pretty obvious. Money makes the world go round."And Dan, one more thing.""Yeah?""MAIM, NOT KILL. Got that?""Sure.You sense a slight pulse of emotion, but Dan brushes it off very quickly."Now if you'll excuse me, I'll just be finishing up with my colleague here," Mr. Foster says before turning to the other banker. "FIX YOUR FUCKING RATES, YA CUNT!" Mr. Foster gives Mr. Costner a neat kick square in the chest, extorting a pained groan from the debtor. Dan taps your shoulder and the two of you leave Mr. Foster to it.CONSTANTLY, IN THE BACKGROUND, EVERY FEW SECONDS (malescream2.ogg) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxk2UTbvhB8ROBBERY IN THE FIRST DEGREE (HOME OST - Shopping Blues (old shopping theme)) https://youtu.be/vTBmKbJLRgY>LOOT TIMEChanneling your inner cargonians, you and Dan immediately split up and start stealing things.The fridge is immediately a bust because it's filled to the brim with dirt and odd glue and dead mice and rotten meat and old machine parts and handfuls of bullet casings and jars of blackening piss and PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING THAT ISN'T FUCKING FOOD. You recoil at the palpable wave of miasma radiating from the refrigerator, the Godawful combination of sweet rot and fermented ammonia like the screams of the damned from an wide open Hellmouth. You retch horrifically. Holy shit, this guy deserved to get the shit and piss beaten out of him. You slam the door shut and desperately focus on keeping your stomach from crawling out your throat.In middle of your bout of gastrointestinal duress, your eyes spot something under the fridge. You reach out for the dice and get a nice even result of>60!<Hey Dan, I got a 60!> You present your brother with the dice."Oh cool." Dan scratches his stubbled chin and it sounds like a desert shaking. "So. What're gonna do you do with this..?"<That's, uh, a good question. I don't know.> "I mean, it's not bad, I guess. Definitely higher than half."You try to think of something interesting, but there's not much else to say other than it's good.You take the dice as is.
>>6310291Feeling pretty satisfied but still aggravated, you pace on the same spot while Dan keeps fruitlessly poking around the cash register even though there's nothing in the till. (If he had some tools, he could probably dismantle the thing into sellable scrap, but oh well.)You ignore the scream coming from the next room in favor of a loose floor tile neither of you noticed earlier. You pry it open and...>95YOU GOT A SHINY TECHNICAL MACHINE!!! YEAH!What the Hell is this thing, anyway? (CHOOSE ONE.)>TM-??? "DARK INFUSION" Special attack with average impact. Target's energy spikes but its health deteriorates over a short time. This TM feels like its trembles in your grippers with a faint inner reverberation...>???-"BAD DREAMS" Replaces a compatible Pokémon's ability with Bad Dreams, reducing the HP of all sleeping opponents. A well-worn casette tape covered in lots of cutesy skulls and faux-spooky doodles in sharpie...>TM-50? "NIGHTMARE" Special attack with cataclysmic impact. Target regenerates the initial damage dealt over a long time. Highly accurate, higher critical hit ratio. It was just a dream...>Write in?TOTAL ACQUITSIONS ACQUIRED:>A "60" (Replaces any selected roll with a 60)>TM OF CHOICE (See above)>"Mr. Sandman" baseball bat (Melee, equipped to Dan)>2898 POKE (DOSH)Mr. Foster and Mr. Roster are patiently waiting outside.There's two smoldering Pokémon on the dark streets outside the shop. These crispy critters aren't moving and you can't sense anything from them...Eh, being Pokémon, they'll be fine, of course, so the three of you walk past them without looking back. The dismal and dark alleyways of the lower city level lighten as you pass with a vague feeling of going further and further upwards until at last, you break free to the open air...>Please roll 1d100, three different anons.TRAVEL EVENTS CHART 1-5 — BAD THINGS COMING6-20 — No encounter.21-40 — City encounter.41-60 — Trainer encounter.61-80 — Pokémon encounter.81-90 — Vendor encounter.91-94 — Ally/Hireling encounter.95-100 — SPECIAL :)The first will decide the encounter type. The other two, well, I'll figure it out.
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>6310297>???-"BAD DREAMS" Replaces a compatible Pokémon's ability with Bad Dreams, reducing the HP of all sleeping opponents. A well-worn casette tape covered in lots of cutesy skulls and faux-spooky doodles in sharpie...
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>6310297>TM-??? "DARK INFUSION" Special attack with average impact. Target's energy spikes but its health deteriorates over a short time. This TM feels like its trembles in your grippers with a faint inner reverberation...EVIL POWER...
>>6310297>TM-??? "FREE WILL" Special status move. Targets allies or self. Target is dispelled of certain applicable debuffs (if any), is shielded a minor amount, and regenerates a minor amount of health over a long time. Does not stack. Harkens back to the Gardevoir protector roots...
Rolled 70 (1d100)>>6310297>>6310310Rolling because I missed it
>>6310297>>???-"BAD DREAMS" Replaces a compatible Pokémon's ability with Bad Dreams, reducing the HP of all sleeping opponents. A well-worn casette tape covered in lots of cutesy skulls and faux-spooky doodles in sharpie...i don't know what garcian's ability is, but if it's any of the vanilla gardevoir ones they are all bad. though if losing telepathy takes away his ability to talk it would suck balls
>>6310313>Stumble over and shake him as hard as you can. (GUNFIGHTER regional variant. Ghost/Steel typing. Likes solving problems by shooting the opponent in the face. Hard-headed and violent personality. "Power to overwhelm and destroy.")From last thread
>>6310315In fact now that I remember this was Garcian...>>6310297Changing vote from >>6310310 even though it's still a nice write-in, to>TM-50? "NIGHTMARE" Special attack with cataclysmic impact. Target regenerates the initial damage dealt over a long time. Highly accurate, higher critical hit ratio. It was just a dream...Because this just fits Garcian better even though Free Will is a more helpful and supportive Sonny 2 move
>>6310315thanks, that doesn't tell me what I want
>>6310317Yeah sorry about that. Better ask the QM and wait for his clarfication I guess? I didn't see any ability mentioned in thread 1
Addressing the allegations:>>6309307>>6309388Thanks for having me back, guys.>>6310313>>6310315>>6310316>>6310317I gotta update that and make it a little more weird and somewhat more thought out. I will say right now his ability is TRACE. As for a hint, Garcian doesn't have a sleep-inducing move.
>>6310319he doesn't have a sleep inducing move NOW but- actually, when does gardevoir learn hypnosis... ok that's not feasible, nevermind
>>6310297>TM-50? "NIGHTMARE" Special attack with cataclysmic impact. Target regenerates the initial damage dealt over a long time. Highly accurate, higher critical hit ratio. It was just a dream...Handy for non-lethal intimidation takedowns, and thus for extortion.>>6310315I don't think that lists an ability...
>>6310319>As for a hint...That's what the baseball bat is for.
>>6310297ok changing this >>6310313 here's my write-in>TM-??? "CANNONBALL" High-power physical Steel-Type move with low accuracy that always flinches. It does what the name implies.
>One... Two... And... Poof!>Garcian learned NIGHTMARE!You're really feeling that magic mojo now! Whatever this is. This type of move feels strong but... funny. It's like a dark cloud of foreign knowledge or a sealed data package ready to be used; it's hard to explain. It's definitely different from what you already know. Hmm."Garcian, get that—" Dan snatches the TM disc out of your mouth. He rubs at it quickly and sighs as he gets black smudges all over the surface. "That's not how you use a technical machine, dummy."<Yeah, but it works.>"You'll scratch the disc if you use it like that. Save it for someone else later on. We can reuse these things, remember?"<Psshhh, don't worry about it. It's not like you're replacing me any time soon.>"Ehhh, I'd definitely stick you outside in a cardboard box if I get a new 'mon. 'Free Gardevoir, hardly used.'"<Asshole.>"Heh.">16 — No encounter.The lower layers of the bottom of White Sands stretch on and on and on. There's white light coming from below the long, long metal walkway the four of you are traveling on. You can't see the bottom or where the light is coming from. Above, there's nothing but absolute darkness. You're walking inside the supporting the structures, the bones of the city itself rather than crawling around on its lively skin. This entire area seems particularly lifeless. Hardly anything can be hear but the sounds of your own footsteps.You turn to the right. Endless, incoherent landscapes of concrete and empty spaces stretch for miles and miles in every direction. The sheer scale of this place is disorienting. No matter how far you go, it feels like you haven't been making any progress. "Garcian, come on, you can't keep gawking." Dan's voice takes you out of your megastructure-induced haze. "Keep a move on."
>>6310745>>6310745Time passes..."So..." Mr. Foster starts. "Cigarette soup. Have I talked about this before?"<Tell him we did. I think.>"Yes, but continue.""Oh yes, I can make some right now if you'd like. It's a real crowd pleaser. All you need is a handful of fags and a beer, and you've got those already."<Dan, tell him you can't feed people that slop. That'll cause... death.>"Well, you're a Pokémon, so you'd get more nutrition out of it than me."<You can't feed Pokémon this slop either.>"But you smoke, you drink with me."<Not the point I'm trying to make, you dog.> Your stomach growls, beating you to the point. <Fuck, I'm starving. Dan, tell him to shut up. I'm hungry and I'm tired and I'm going to throw him over the railing if he keeps talking.>Neither of you actually stop him. The dream of food is just as nourishing as food at this point."Now if I had a rat or two, I could whip up some burgers," Mr. Foster rambles on. You drool like a dog. "I've seen it done in a film once. A real rat, not a Rattata, those have too much lean, explosive muscle, not enough fat. Then there's bloody solyanka. One of my colleagues shared the recipe once. It can be done with a few kippers, a few leeches or Tynamo, some cabbage, fresh salted pickles—"Mr. Foster slaps his hand with a fist. Everyone stops. "I've got it! Canned bread!"<Canned bread..!>"Canned bread..?""Grooooooaaaa...""It's a $100 per can, special import from the Marshall Islands, only for the most refined of tastes. That's not an asking price, lads," Mr. Fosters adds quickly, seeing the three intense expressions directed at him. "I don't actually have anything on me. Me and Mr. Roster would have eaten it by now, anyway."You and Dan let out a deflating groan.<Tell him to shut up about all this fucking food then! Jesus.> Between the hunger, the disappointment, the inability to use telepathy on him, and the lingering concussion, you're really starting to get pissed."Mr. Foster," Dan says acting as your proxy. "Just be quiet now. Please.""Mmm."The four of you return to traveling in dejected silence...
>>6310746Then, eventually, after an incredibly long time has passed (or maybe another an hour, it's hard to tell down here), you find yourselves in part of the real White Sands again. White light seeps in from the top of the surrounding buildings. It must be noon or just past it; the lights of the suns are the most intense at this time. You can hear the sound of rumbling of machines underfoot as the city expands deeper into the earth.There is a man in a white shirt and jeans pacing around on a corner of the street. It looks like he's busy with an air hose wrapped around his shoulder, but from the emotions you can just barely sense and the blank look of sheer boredom on his face, there's not much going on for him."Hey dude guy!" Dan shouts, raising a hand. "Tell us where the closest food is!" The man's head tilts up and Dan recoils as as their eyes meet. Cocksucking terrorist motherfucker, it's shit like this that makes you want to break teeth on bones. You can't help but grimace as you brace for what's obviously coming next. TRAINERS' EYES MEET (GUY) (LISA: The Timeless OST - Morons' Theme) https://youtu.be/bBkSrBVuhxgThe guy saunters up with a faint grin on his face. You resist the urge to punch him in the face. "Heya fellas. I'm real bored right now, so how about this? You beat me, I'll tell you the directions to the nearest restaurant. Deal?""Fine. Just get it over with." Dan's foot taps against the floor. From his pocket, the guy takes out a Pokeball and clicks it. In a burst of red light, a sleepy looking... Fuck, you wish you paid more attention to Dan's Pokémon classes because you don't know the name for this thing. Okay, so, this 'mon looks like some kind of hot pink sleep paralysis demon or a Sour Patch kid coming up to about size of your shin. It's got whitish hair in a ponytail and two hair tuffs sticking up and at attention like a pair of rabbit ears. It's wearing a little leather satchel and wields a rough wooden mallet larger than it is. You guess you could call it cute if it weren't for the incredibly malicious grin on its face as it stares directly into your soul."So what's it going to be then, eh?" Dan sizes up the guy, just as you size up your comparatively diminutive opponent. This thing looks a little stronger than you..."Just a nice, casual match. No items 'cept what's already held. You and your Gardevoir friend there up against me and Jamie here.""Fair enough." Dan turns to you and points a thumb. "Alright, Garcian, get in there."
>>6310752<No, fuck off,> you snap at Dan. "Listen, man, that thing is the only thing standing between us and a hot meal. And between you and me, I'm getting tired of being hungry."<Listen, man,> you repeat with your hunger and lingering concussion fueling your irritation. You're genuinely unnerved looking at that pink thing. <I'm fine with letting you starve because I'm sure as Hell not fighting that thing in melee. Just look at it, that bitch looks Satanic!>"WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF FAMINE, YOU BITCH NIGGA." Dan lightly shakes your shoulders to emphasize the point. You lightly push him off, grumbling.You turn to the other Pokémon in the party. You clench and unclench your hands as you try save some of your remaining dignity and energy in this fuck-fuck circus of a day.<Mr. Roster, please do me a solid and fill in.>[Grhmm-mhmm-mhmm,] the bigger Pokémon mumbles as it bobs its head, utterly incoherent.<What?> This is the first time you've heard his voice.[Mmmmmmmrrrrrrrpppghhh!] The Pokémon gesticulates excitedly. <Come on, you gotta speak up, buddy. This is a matter of life or death out here.>Your employer's pokemon sighs deeply, then points directly at you and then at the opponent. [Gru! Gho!]<Oh for fuck's sake, not you too.>[Mmhmm.] Mr. Roster crosses his arms, content with watching you squirm.SPERG SOCIAL COMBAT BEGINSDAN'S GOAL: Get Garcian to fight for GLORY and STRIFE.GARCIAN'S GOAL: ???>Funniest write-ins win for convincing the other guy.>Give up arguing and start throwing hands at Dan.>Give up arguing and start throwing hands at the opponent.>Give up arguing and start throwing hands at the other trainer.>WRITE IN.
>>6310753Shit, I didn't realize the dialogue format would suck dick without spacing. It looked better in Notepad. I apologize.
>>6310753>Dan: Then don't fight it in melee you daft cunt.
>>6310753>Roster, you gotta eat too. I'll get you a corndog, an anthill, an entire Lechonk if that's what it takes. But fucking gas that thing and roast the remains, do what's best for the planet!that might be the local Tinkaton i believe, if Garcian wasn't such a bitch I'd like to get one...
>>6310753>FUNN WRITE IN: Look at its stupid fucking face, Roster. Look at its vacant, asian bean eating face. Don't you just wanna beat the shit out of it?>Look at its stupid fucking grin. It's probably thinking of fucking your mom after this.
>>6310809+1
>>6310753>Look at its stupid fucking grin. It's probably thinking of fucking your mom after this.>Roster you should bang its mom after this
>>6310753>Give up arguing and start throwing hands at the opponent.It's a good excuse to test out Nightmare, at least.
>>6310818Bwahaha, nice. The pointing is a very nice pose for Garcian. Funny as Hell, you and I were thinking the same thing with the Kirby star hammer design for Jamie's.
>>6310858+1 the>Roster you should bang its mom after thisbit to go with the rest of the write in with >>6310809
>Dan: Then don't fight it in melee you daft cunt.You grumble sulkily as harebrained images of Dan fighting the pink thing and getting his ass kicked flash through your brain. Dan's eyes narrow at you, even more than they normally are, as if reading your mind. In fact, you probably just projected those images at him. Oops.You quickly turn to Mr. Roster and bring him in for a huddle.>Look at its stupid fucking face, Roster. Look at its vacant, asian bean eating face. It's probably thinking of fucking your mom after this. Don't you just wanna beat the shit out of it?>Roster, you should bang its mom after this.[Hudda hudda hudda.] Mr. Roster is nodding with every word you say. It is clear to him too that the beast is demonic in nature and certainly up to no good.[So... Have at it, man.] You pat on its shoulder and point.[Nho.] Mr. Roster stays where he is.[What do you mean no? Aren't you going to help a mon out here?][Uh huh.] Mr. Roster points an empathetic claw at you, then at the opposing monster, and lets out a lick of flame from his snout. Groooooaaahhh...Mr. Roster seems to be willing to help, but not actually fight in your stead. Good enough.You let out a sigh, slap your face with both hands, and walk forwards."Ready?" the trainer asks with some excitement."Ready," Dan says plainly as ever.[Are your ready for this, little man?] You point directly at the opposing Pokémon. [I'll eat your heart, Mister.] She giggles and a wicked grin splits her face. Her voice is exactly how you think it sounds like. [... Creepy bitch.]VS JAMIE; ONI WITH AN WOODEN CLUB (Brad Has A Pain OST: A Chair - Tall Order) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4faItLqB58Jamie immediately reaches into her satchel, takes out a flask, and starts gulping down the contents.>???>Jamie is filled with liquid courage! Jamie is giving and taking more damage!You sense the mixed contentment and growing boldness from Jamie as she shudders from the taste of warm tequila coursing through her body. You have no idea if that's a move or if this little gremlin motherfucker just cheated right in front of your face. Dan apparently reads your mind a second time as he immediately motions to the opposing trainer. "Hey, guy, what the Hell was that? I thought you said no items?""Well, I didn't use an item. Jamie did..." A cheeky grin appears on the other guy's face as if that could absolve him of any crime. "And you didn't specify if we're playing by League regulations or not, so...""You fucking rat."You're about to add something to the conversation, when you remember you're the Pokémon in this and turn towards Jamie, who is only a few yards away and approaching with clear ill-intent...
>>6311515GARCIAN'S MOVESETPHYSICAL: Thief, Frustration, Bullet PunchSPECIAL: Disarming Voice, Confusion/Psybeam, Magical Leaf, NightmareSTATUS: GrowlPOSITIONING: Blink/TeleportGarcian is a Ghost/Steel type Pokémon. Jamie is a ??? type Pokémon. (You're reasonably sure that thing is a Fairy of sorts...) INFORMATION: Preparation Round: Under normal circumstances, Garcian may perform one STATUS/non-damaging move or one miscellaneous action at the start of battle without interruption. INFORMATION: Moves in red are severely hampered or violently affected by the anti-Psychic field of Sunrose. Garcian can perform weaker versions of Psychic moves without strain.Garcian >NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE. You should also come up with a plan for afterwards, if this move isn't all that it's cracked up to be...>Blink away and start firing off a few Confusions to open up. GOD, YOU WISH YOU COULD S.T.A.B THIS THING.>Anyway, you start blasting. Open up with an immediate Bullet Punch to get real close and keep punching.>Vomit. Vomit at her, yeah!>Employ Mr. Roster's help.>WRITE IN.Dan>Walk over and break a beer bottle over Jamie's head.>Beat the shit out of this guy and rob him of everything he's got.>Keep cool, man, just keep cool.>Switch to Dan's perspective (Bark orders and argue with the other trainer)>Stay in Garcian's perspective (HEY, FUCK, I'M THE GUY WHO'S FIGHTING HERE, NOT DAN)>WRITE IN.Just for clarification, [brackets will be used to indicate Pokémon speaking aloud] and <less-than and greater-than signs will be used to denote Garcian's private telepathy.> The earlier conversation between Garcian and Mr. Roster should have used []s for both parties.Also, combat is mostly narrative with some dice rolls until I find a funny system.
>>6311517>>NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE. You should also come up with a plan for afterwards, if this move isn't all that it's cracked up to be...>Stay in Garcian's perspective (HEY, FUCK, I'M THE GUY WHO'S FIGHTING HERE, NOT DAN)fuckem up
>>6311517>NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE. You should also come up with a plan for afterwards, if this move isn't all that it's cracked up to be...After we see how effective it is, maybe we can get her bag or mallet with Thief.>Stay in Garcian's perspective (HEY, FUCK, I'M THE GUY WHO'S FIGHTING HERE, NOT DAN)
>>6311517>NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE. You should also come up with a plan for afterwards, if this move isn't all that it's cracked up to be...Wakey wakey bitch>Stay in Garcian's perspective (HEY, FUCK, I'M THE GUY WHO'S FIGHTING HERE, NOT DAN)We can have more Dan (the man) later
>>6311517Oh shit this is a regular Tinkatuff? I hope Nightmare is still a Ghost move despite being the Sonny 2 attack, because then Garcian gets STAB off of it because he's Ghost/Steel. Next turn if things go well we try to Thief her bag like >>6311564 said. She'll heal it off slowly because of Nightmare's effect and Thief won't do much to her at all, but we can always use Nightmare again (or spam STAB Bullet Punch) and we get to keep the loot
