OH SHIT NIGGA. You are lady Firemane. Of the (formerly) noble house of Fireborn! You were once the greatest wagon racer this side of the kingdom. Sadly due to shenanigans, you lost everything and went into debt with the Adventurer's Guild in order to survive. But then you found the Inexperienced Hero, Ezekiel "Kid" Rutebega ! You took him under your wing to mold him into the hero he's always meant to be: your devoted apprentice (probably)Ezekiel's older brother has started his campaign of destruction, he leads his hordes of undead barbarians to ravage the lands. As members of the guild, your party has went on the quest chain to stop said undead barbarian horde.In pursuit of said barbarian horde, the party is currently going through the SPOOKY FOREST™
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>6349652A very spooky spider block your path.
>>6349659>>6349659
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>6349663Cast a touch over the spider. Maybe it can unspookify the spider?
>>6349668
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6349671Can we pass through, spider? What other spooky creature live in this forest?
>>6349676"There's like, living trees, undead, zombies, giant bats, ya know, the works"
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>6349679Ok. Got any side quest perhaps along the spooky shenanigans?
>>6349682"Well, there's this one crypt deep in the forest. Or the witches' hut. Also deep in the forest, but in the other direction"
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>6349684All right, let go with the witches' hut side quest. Maybe she have a way to go pass through the infinity herd of cows that blocking the route.
>>6349691
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>6349697Go to the right pass that may led to the witch hut.
>>6349700Surely you won't run into anything spooooky here
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6349702Let the dice tell what we going to recounter. . . Hope it not too spooky.
>>6349709>9OH SHIT A SKELETON
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6349725Is he a good skeltal?
What the fuck I thought OP was actually fucking dead for real this time.
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6349725Is he?!
Rolled 68 (1d100)>>6349753Possibly?
>>6349754Yeah he looks pretty chill
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>6349753No
Rolled 58 (1d100)>>6349757Ask Mr.Skeltal about the witch
>>6349759"She's a terrible one! You'd be cursed if you deal with her, friend. She turned me into a newt!"
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>6349761Cool, any advice for dealing with her?
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>6349761A newt?
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6349757Get in the car closer! We are going on an adventure!
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6349761You don't look like a newt.
>>6349765"I got better"
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>6349766You aren't a dirty Knight Who says "Ni" are you?
>>6349767"Nah man, I'm just a skeleton. Observe how I am completely indifferent to this shrubbery"
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>6349769Good. I didn't want to bite your ankles.Where is the witch?
>>6349770"Oh just head down this road, past this giant evil murder unicorn"
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6349778Cool. Thanks Mr.Skeltal. We'll be on our way.
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>6349778Wow. You hid that pretty well. Did you train it to appear dramatically like that?
>>6349779Mr Skeltal bids you good bye and leaves the screen
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>6349784Begin diplomacy with the giant evil murder unicorn.
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6349784Burn the shrubbery and peel out
>>6349787
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6349793LOOK! OVER THERE! A VERY SPOOKY MAGICAL BUTTERFLY FLUTTERING TOWARD YOU!
Rolled 54 + 60 (1d100 + 60)>>6349800WILL FIREMANE CONVINCE THE UNICORN TO LOOK OVER THERE?
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>6349811What the fuck do you mean he gets a +60 to the roll?
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>6349812>1THE UNICORN GETS MAD AND CHARGES AT YOU!
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6349815Good thing our wagon was built for exactly this kind of scenario.
Rolled 78 (1d100)>>6349819The unicorn pierces the ground where you stood, but you swerved out of the way in time!
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6349824Oh no, he's catching back up!?
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>6349824Spin-n
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>6349828The Unicorn attempts to kick you! But you spun Shitfucker around just in time!
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6349834Blaze-on, Shitfucker.
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6349834Beat this Unicorn's ass!
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6349834KILL THAT NIGGA
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6349843Channeling the fireknight powers of Firemane and Ezekiel, Shitfucker is launched straight at the Unicorn! Slamming into its giant evil undead murder face!
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>6349856A critical hit!?
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6349856Break the horn with a spin kick!
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6349858POWER CLASH!
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>6349865Button mashhhhhh
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>6349865BUTTON MASH HARDER!!! UUUUOOOOOOH!
>>6349867MASSSSSHHHHHH
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6349875THE POWER SURGES! PRESS THE BUTTON HARDER!
Rolled 79 (1d100)>>6349875Kaboooom
>>6349894>>6349878
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6349897Negotiations: Concluded.
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6349897Take horn
>>6349898With diplomacy finished, you are able to head deeper into the spooky forest, now slightly brighter thanks to your shenanigans.Ezekiel looks at you with admiration while Night Knightess mumbles something about you being a brute or whatever. Double Wizard and Fist of God just chill out in the backseat, having nothing to do this episode so far.All's well that ends well. Imma uh, go to bed now, bread continues like, tomorrow probs.Updates b here n shit: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>6349652oh there you are, I don't use social media and was afraid something happened when I didn't see you on the board for a while.
>>6349905X didn't inform me that you had a thread. Feels like YouTube not telling me about my subscriptions. They are literally phasing out humans in social media with AI. Why? I have crazy theories. Like using an AI loop so that even users are replaced by AI and corporations get money from advertisers and only AI responds.
>>6350148>>6350274
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6350310Another random spooky recounter appear.
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6350310It all them barbarians fault! They can't run social media!
>>6350317HOLY SHIT ZOMBIES
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>6350414communist zombies
>>6350415this was the 69th post surely this means we have to have sex with Ezekiel
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6349652rolling
>>6350424Not sure if firemane or night knightess
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>6350415This is the real problem
Well I got the highest roll which means me anon supporter of Firemane wins the section. Which means Ezekiel must have sex with Firemane.and we finally get an actual sex scene drawn by OP
>>6350557Maybe a titjob since real artist and creator of the quest notapaladin on x.com keeps making her tits bigger to prevent anons from leaving the quest.
>>6350628Cowgirl reveling in pleasure. I can be horny too. Just don't like constant romantic comedy every thread we do.
>>6350630What unchecked consumption of anime does to a motherfucker. Totally annihilates the dopamine receptors, it leaves them incapable of voting for anything other than porn actions in quests. Real shame to see.
>>6350633Yeah...
As much as I would like to see Firemane and Ezekiel finally do it, you can't just force these things.
>>63506434chan users thinks another 4chan user is being 100 percent genuine with his vote in a shitpost quest.
>>6350633>>6350643You say that, yet you aren't for rolling anything else. Besides, we almost got to that point during the multiverse episode.
>>6350661I don't think I can roll for anything else, I voted for that because it was clear that we entered another hiatus and my roll is obviously something that's going to be ignored because obviously it a joke that would get us nowhere in the current context of the situation. Please get over yourselves.
>>6350680Take a chill pill.
>>6350415>>6350680
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6350768Dear lord, they're maoists!
>>6350772Dios mio!
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6350774More crosses are needed
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6350780I mean yeah hard to argue with that
>>6350780Incoming crosses
>>6350780As if on cue, Fist of God steps forward and blasts the communists with crosses
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>6351315And then they explode
>>6351318
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>6351319Very nice. Now time to take a detour into the obligatory Christmas holiday special.
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>6351319Well then, How far to travel is the witch hut, Double Wizard?
>>6351327"About 2 more random encounters, at most"
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>6351330We don't have TIME for random encounters Time for fast travel
>>6351331"But can we even fast travel to a location we've never been to?"
>>6351335It's alright, we'll just open the console and type>tmm 1
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6351336
>>6351338>tmm 1
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>6351341It just works.FAST TRAVEL AWAY.
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>6351341A spooky reindeer randomly appear next to Night Knightess.
>>6351342>>6351346
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6351350And then they spawned right next to a spooky reindeer.
>>6351352
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6351355Is it doing anything?
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6351357Roll against whatever my dice is to see!....for next time! Cuz I gotta sleep now! Communist overlords aint giving christmas holidays
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>6351359Damn
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>6351359Rollen
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6351359
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>6351359
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6351359You tease, you give Knightess a sexy christmas outfit, but you ignore our protagonist, the one that literally fights for us, Fist of God.
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6351359NightSister valiantly protects Ezekiel by pulling him into the comforting confines of her chest
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6351359What the dog doing?
>no anon rolled above a 91
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>6351689Tactically planned so that Night Knightess would lose her helmet in the fight against the reindeer which would force OP to draw her face.
Rolled 30 (1d100)>>6351689What now!? Notorious FoG!? What should we do!?
>>6351690My god! Night Knightess' hat has been knocked off! Right over there! Offscreen!
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>6351692OH MY GOD OP TURN THE CAMERA YOU FAT FUCK, WE NEED TO SEE!
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6351692Drink a beer then
>>6351694"My god! A can of beer! Right over there! Offscreen!
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6351695Fist of God and Double Wizard do be sippin' on those brewskies.
>>6351696
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>6351699Do you believe in double Jesus?
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6351699Observe Night Knightess getting her ass beat by undead wildlife.
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6351699Now, switch back the camera to Night Knightess.
>>6351700Of course. Double Jesus. Who wields double crosses.Like nunchucks.Crosschucks
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6351704Man that's the coolest Jesus I know hey what's that's bitch doing
>>6351705
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>6351706Okay Firemane, think back to Fire School. What did your old mentor say about undead reindeer during holiday specials?
>>6351707Ah yes. Let's remember the wise words of Sir Flamesby:"HOLY SHIT AN UNDEAD RAINDEER AAAAAHHHHH" then he burned the classroom down
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6351709Right then, guess we need to build a classroom to burn down. How do we go about doing that?
>>6351710Unfortunately you never paid attention in shop classDue to burning it down, you see. Firemane was kind of a delinquent back then
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6351714Damn those were the good old days. Get lost in the memories of being a delinquent.
>>6351715
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>6351719Horrifying behaviour!
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6351719You bitch!
>>6351725
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6351735HALT, MISCREANT! THIS IS THE KING'S ROYAL CONSTABULARY!
>>6351736Oh shit it's the cop knights
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>6351740Cheese it!
>>6351743
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6351751More!
>>6351754
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6351759Night Knight is strolling down the hallway.
Rolled 40 (1d100)>>6351759MORE! SWISS, CHEDDAR, COTTAGE, AND BLUE!
>>6351760
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>6351776HA, NERD!
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>6351776Is that Stacey Burgerson?
>>6351778"Endure it...Night Knight. You'll have your day...one day"
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>6351784Your day, in Hell!
>>6351785
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>6351789Pick up Night Knight and drag him to a wagon race.
>>6351797
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6351802'Time for a race, nerd. Let see what you got!"Perceive to dunk Night Knight into the wagon.
>>6351807"Can't we talk this out?"
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6351813Why?
>>6351814"I bruise easily"gotta go eat brb
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>6351816Well someone is gonna race and I don't see nobody else.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6351816shut up and drive, NERD
>>6351816He never came back .... Brb means nothing to the internet any more.
>>6352216Ah, no, you see, when he said "brb", he meant "birb", as in "gotta go eat bird"
>>6352217trve
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6352218So are you finished?
>>6352221Probably, uh, in like 20 hours
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>6352224I... I was nice today.
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6353035Damn proxy banned people! They keep using me as a proxy! Or I think that's how it works?
>>6352218Well!?
>>6353486Work got me so tired I overslept.Fuuuucking woooops
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>6354097"Come now, nerd. The race is about to start."Firemane hop in at the back seat of the wagon.
>>6354107
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6354115What the other participants that join this race?
>>6354121Look! It's Nameless FaceLess Only Appears In Flashback Knight!
Rolled 53 (1d100)>>6354125Grumble grumble fuckin baron telling me I'm grounded grumble grumble.
>>6354131And next to him, the Brat Knight!
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6354135Well time to swagger over to our hotrod wagon which is indubitably one of the finest four wheeled forms of transportation in this kingdom
>>6354142
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>6354145Wow, we must be such an inspiration for hoodlums everywhere!
>>6354151Hoodlum Knight taking notes
Rolled 80 (1d100)>>6354154Now lets see the sexy flag waver who'll wave the flag to signla the start of the race.
>>6354155
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6354159The countdown! It has begun!
>>6354161
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6354162READY... SET... Snap back to reality! During our flashback, Ezekiel has defeated the Reindeer and Night Knightess is now trying smoother him in her boobs for saving her! This is outrageous!
>>6354163
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6354167Quickly, disarm the situiation before we become the secondary love interest!
>>6354168
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6354170>convenient plot happeningIT HAS A SECOND PHASE!
>>6354173
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>6354178Go go Firemane, it is your time to shine!
>>6354188
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6355124GET DUNKED ON
>>6355126The explosion temporarily lit up the spooky forest
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6355132Alright, who's not dead? Sound off.
Rolled 42 (1d100)>>6355132Everyone walks away from an explosion with cool glasses on
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6355132Satan had really bad diarrhea there
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6355132He just kept chugging along. Chugga-chugga-chugga-chuggachugga-chugga-chugga-chuggaToot! TOOT!
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>6355132Got rid of x cuz now the grok AI is allowed to steal shit and claim it as x's property
>>6355133"A-""No no. She said "Sound OFF". That clearly means keep quiet. You gotta think about this stuff abit, Kiddo"
Rolled 26 (1d100)>>6357285Oh no, I guess Night Knightess was killed by the deer when nobody was looking. That's so sad...just gone, like that.
>>6357294"Hey! That's not what happened!"Sometimes...you can still hear her voice. Ooooh what a tragic fate
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>6357308You should probably start getting back on the car and going back on track to our goal.
>>6357312And so the party heads deeper into the spooky forest. BAck on track for when...OP wakes up later.Hopefully the communist overlords wont have another week of overtime for me when I wake up
>>6357318Thanks for running. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, ya filthy animal.
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6357318The forest starts having Las Vegas vibes
>>6357791My god. The scariest of all.Capitalism
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6358658Plot twist! Turns out the "Witch Hut" is actually a giant, evil casino.
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6358658caesars palace
>>6358659
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6358665go inside. slots are calling
>>6358665It's time for GAMBLINGGo in, we have a bunch of money anyway right?
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>6358671
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>6358665Truth is... the game was rigged from the start.
>>6358666>>6358672>>6358785Oh shit it's the skeleton casino guard!"No weapons allowed inside"
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6360189What about THESE weapons, though?>Flex aggressively
>>6360190
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>6360194I bet you don't have BIG MUSCLES like this, huh Knightess? You're probably too busy being lame to get gainz.
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>6360194Or too lame to get Deez titz!
Rolled 47 (1d100)>>6360194Gamble for entry
>>6360196
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6361738While the girls continue their standoff, the others go in and GAMBLE
>>6361741The most wholesome of activities!
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6362955Slots! Slots! Slots!
Rolled 11 (1d100)>>6362955Yep. Just some pure wholesome gambling. Definitely no crazy impossible death gamble monster machines anywhere.
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6362955Looks like he caught the eye of Don Corneo.
>>6363021My favorite ntr bait
Rolled 29 (1d100)>>6362955Busty double witch waitress shows up with drinks.
>>6362972"Hey you! Wanna try the crazy impoosible death gamble monster machine?"
Rolled 65 (1d100)>>6363531Lmao, of course he's not gonna go gamble in a literal death mac->ZAWA....ZAWA...
>>6363546
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>6363548What a horrible plot twist. It turns out that Ezekiel's secret weakness that basically every hero has was GOOMBLING
>>6363548Red phone is ringing.
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6363577
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>6363578>>6363548Ring ring! It's commissioner Gordon! He needs ShounenMan and his trusty side kick jumplad!
The reason this quest has slowed down so much is because it's not about skeletons so OP can't draw fat shotasniffer tits in every panel, thus killing his motivation to draw.
>>6366008I'm pretty sure Firemane is bigger than her anyway
>>6366008We keep saying end the fucking game or save for later. But does he listen? No!
>>6366008What Op needs is a fresh new game. And take a vote. Warhammer 40k is getting popular, maybe make a Skelly chooses which faction does he side on.
I don't know man, I *would* like seeing some manner of end to Firemane and Ezekiel's story, at last.
>>6366172Then end it! Figure out how to end it all in the next few final posts!
>>6366178That's a little bit abrupt, isn't it anon? Well, I guess it all depend on the QM, but still.
>>6366179If you ever been in these specific threads before, ending abruptly is a natural occurrence.
>>6366008It's actually because recent workdays leave me really sleepy so I pass out right after I get home
>>6363550His companions attempt to sway him away from the crazy impossible death gamble monster machine
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6366981DON'T GIVE UP EZEKIELUSE YOUR HERO STRENGTHYOU NEED TO GAMBLEYOU NEED TO BE THE 10% THAT DOESN'T QUIT
>>6366982"DO NOT BE SWAYED BY THE INCREDIBLY HIGH STAKES OF THE IMPOSSIBLE DEATH GAMBLE MONSTER MACHINE, KID!""CLOSE YOUR HEART TO IT, BOY"
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6366985Rolling to break away from them and gamble every last coin you had.
Rolled 3 (1d100)>>6366985But, but.. there the chance to roll the mysterious mystery box though..
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6366987QUICK! MASH THE QTE!
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>6366990Damn, what possible odds, light tap.
>>6366991I gotta eep, another update 2morrow night
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>6366997Turns out lolli sniffer owns this Witch Casino
>>6367839
Rolled 22 (1d100)>>6368172Alright, alright, I'm not gonna gamble all my money...I'm gonna gamble all OUR money
>>6368173"That group down there sure looks rowdy....guess they're enjoying themselves"
Rolled 76 (1d100)>>6368183Firemane and Lady Knight finally arrive after finishing their muscle-off. Will they help the hero GAMBLE?
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>6368183Firemane and Knightess' flexing has continued and attracted a small crowd of spectators
>>6368186"Oh good, you're back. Help us sway Ezekiel here from the evils of the crazy impossible death gamble monster machine:
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6368582GAMBLE LIKE A TRUE HERO, KID. YOUR GOD GIVEN RIGHT
Rolled 14 (1d100)>>6368582Oh look over their, Ezekiel! A mystery box have appear on top of Lolisniffer head.Wonder what inside the box? Maybe something spooky perhaps?
>>6368583"GASP! A BAD INFLUENCE!"
>>6368588ROLL
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>6368589SONOVABITCH
Rolled 6 (1d100)>>6368591
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6368594SNAKE EYES
>>6368594
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6368596Let spin the dice on the machine.
>>6368597"Hey there! Are you here to try the crazy impossible death gamble monster machine? It's very simple! It's like slots. Except that if you roll anything other that the jackpot of Five 7s. You die!"
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6368601Wowser, what the chance to roll.Come on, Kid. Let rig it to our favor!
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>6368601>riggingYou just need to believe....BELIEVE IN THE HEART OF THE SLOTS
>>6368603>>6368636YEAH JUST GOTTA BELIEVE
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6368652Gambling Money!!!!!
>>6368655"THAT'S RIGHT BOY! GO AHEAD! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE?!"
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6368730okay well now that you're supporting it its not fun anymore
>>6368733"Alright. Then I won't even look and will have not particularly strong feelings about it one way or another"
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6368742ALRIGHT, WE'RE ALL IN
>>6368743Yeah just roll a 5d20 and get 5 7s in a row. Simple right?
Rolled 3, 19, 9, 18, 14 = 63 (5d20)>>6368959Alrighty then
Rolled 10, 18, 6, 2, 14 = 50 (5d20)>>6368959SPIN SPIN SPIN!
Rolled 12, 1, 19, 8, 7 = 47 (5d20)>>6368959Summon more skeletons
Hey look, there's a 7 there. There's a chance. Keep rolling.
Rolled 6, 1, 13, 17, 18 = 55 (5d20)>>6368973Pocket dices
>>6368975"It's just a few gold per pull. What's the worst that could happen, right?"
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>6368981All that frantic pulling causes the machine to burst into flames
Rolled 36 (1d100)>>6368981Ezekiel goes into extreme debt. I don't even know how he spent more money than he had but he did it.
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>6368981Kid somehow rolled up the mystery box by chance.Maybe something very spooky inside that Lolisniffer trapped inside the box?
>>6368984>>6368986"Don't fret, dear customer, you've simply activated FEVER MODE. Each pull requires more gold but the payout has been Quadrupled.">>6368987"Also there's no mystery box, shush"
Rolled 8, 4, 10, 5, 2 = 29 (5d20)>>6368988Why not, keep going
Rolled 5, 17, 3, 8, 7 = 40 (5d20)>>6368988Rollen
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>6368988Firemane crushes OP between her thighs for his crimes against humanity.
Rolled 10, 10, 5, 16, 1 = 42 (5d20)>>6368988
Rolled 5, 12, 17, 17, 7 = 58 (5d20)>>6368988
>>6368992>>6368993>>6369014>>6369015EZEKIEL KEEPS ON GAMBLING WITH NO WINS IN SIGHT!>>6368995Tempting. Next time bby
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6369161Fist of God went off looking for the spooky witch.
>>6369165"YOU! WHERE IS THE SPOOKY WITCH OF THIS WITCH'S HUT CASINO?!""C'mon man I just work here"
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6369174To be. Well than, can you at least point where she might be?
>>6369178"Yeah, right over there"
Rolled 83 (1d100)>>6369182Look over to where the skeleton pointed at.
>>6369185
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>6369191The spooky witch has appear to be sitting in a chair with a teacup in hand.
>>6369194MY GOD! AND THE SPOOKY WITCH HAS THE TERRIFYING VISAGE OF....
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6369211>AFist of God got a nose blood somehow. .
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>6369211A but with giant skeleton tits
>>6369217No! Fist of God! Remember your oaths! Your duties! Surely you're not swayed by undead ladies in dresses and impossible skeleton anatomy!
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>6369251He might? Love could be stronger than God? Let's see!?
Rolled 97 (1d100)>>6369254IS IT?
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6369255Yeah he is chaste, you rolled a 97 for him to not be in love with skeletons and we ain't beating that. I also don't want to beat that because it's a fucking stupid plot development,
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6369257Damn that's real close, anon. Are you sure?
>>6369301I guess we got our answer
>>6369301Shit FoG now becoming more than a 2d character about Duty!?
>>6369388Every character here is 2DCuz they're drawn
>>6369470
>>6369301FoG can't deny his heart anymore, and immediately start macking on the Spooky Witch"Oh darling, who would want an old bag of bones like me?"
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6370053Everyone disliked that.
Rolled 38 (1d100)>>6370056nuh uh, i like it.
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6370053Glared of old night. Very spooky indeed!Also, looking for you. If you known a way to pass through the infinity herd of cows that blocking the route to the guild.
>>6370056>>6370064
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>6370071All true men knows that pure-hearted champions of good and justice are meant for evil, black-hearted women.
>>6370073
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6370111Well, Ezekiel is compulsively gambling, FoG is courting the big titty skeleton...good thing the other three aren't so easily distracted, right?
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>6370111Is this love... That I am feelin'!? Karaoke opens up on the main stage
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6370053Dawww>>6370111SUDDENLY! Fantasy IRS agents arrive!
Rolled 37 (1d100)>>6370111Remember that you forgot what you were supposed to be remembering. But forget that, too.
>>6370130As FoG regale the spooky witch with his dulcet tones, he notices the Casino Owner approaching her
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6371608I'm sure that means nothing bad whatsoever.
>>6371610Yeah, definitely. Especially since it looks like he's ordering her to do something.
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>6371619I'm sure whatever it is is no big deal.
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6371619What spooky surprise will be?Maybe give him a hug perhaps.
>>6371646"Alright toots, you know the deal. Now get out there and-----what are you doing?"
Rolled 69 (1d100)>>6371901If you interrupt my serenade again i'm going to show you how ashes are REALLY madesee the joke is that ashes are actually heavily composed of pulverized bone
>>6371902"Yeah yeah. Settle down, lover boy."
Rolled 23 (1d100)>>6371905Okay, I've had enough. Let's go back to the others. What's Firemane doing?
>>6371908Also, somebody take over, it's too late for me
Rolled 13 (1d100)>>6371905Happily prance away like a young boy who was just told “now run along, you scamp.”
>>6371908Camera cuts back to Firemane, who's trying to console Ezekiel over getting zero jackpots
Rolled 57 (1d100)>>6371928Maybe going for the rigging option than. Night Knightess, do you got any better idea instead?
>>6371937"Preferably I'd have Zeke not gamble in the first place. Rigging that thing may be our only option. Cuz now he not only owes the casino money, but also his soul"
Rolled 100 (1d100)>>6372022How do you even rid slots? Sadly, tilting the building doesn't work.
>>6372030Of course I would get a 100 here...
>>6372030"Well, we can use magic to make the wheels spin the way we want. We do have a wizard---"
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6372049Alright then, who's gonna be the one to spin it? Not the wizard, it's too obvious.
Rolled 82 (1d100)Cool, I wasn't aware that OP still ran these quests>>6372049Must have been the wind
>>6372051>>6372081"Well I mean, Zeke's the one whose soul is one the line, so--""EZEKIEL! YOUR SOUL BELONGS TO THE CASINO NOW"
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>6372089Alright then, in that case, we need to challenge her to a GAME to get HIS backAlright, which of you are willing to wager yours to save Kid?
>>6372092"Yeah! And wagering your own soul will not give a chance to save him, but also show which one cares about him more!"
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>6372350Sure, sure. Well then, Night Knightess let test our chance on getting back Kid soul.Alos FoG give a hug to Spooky witch as well.
>>6372361"Well naturally, since I am his one true soul mate, and mine is worth more. I will wager my own soul for his"
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6372455But the game of choice is... UNOWhich Night Knightess is absolute ASS at
>>6372460"Pfffffft. please. I am awesome at UNO. Those other times were just bad RNG"
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>6372921TIME TO DUEL
>>6372923
Rolled 96 (1d100)>>6372927I have never played uno and don't know the rules, hopefully there is a hype man in the audience who can explain what is happening while having extreme facial reactions
>>6372927"Do you got any 5s?"
>>6372929This was my roll>>6372928:^)
>>6372928"UNO huh? This is going to be a bloodbath"
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>6372951Yeah, this run is getting pretty boring. Let's push the reset button and start a new game.
>>6372953I'll press YOUR reset button!
Rolled 19 (1d100)>>6372954lmaoOkay, fine then, if you feel that strongly about it. Let the games begin!Wait, what's that?!Unsolicited opinions on israel?!
>>6372954Wait a minute, I don't think you can play Uno 1v1
>>6372960
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6372962Something is wrong with the dice?
>>6372960Ah, well you see anon, at the table, there's not only the Spooky Witch, but also the Skeletal Staff of the casino, ensuring the game is rigged in the Casino's favor, since as long as anybody from the Casino wins, i-- >>6372957
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>6373002Well you can't have two skeletons. You need a friendly player on the other side to help set up the plays. That's how mahjon- I mean Uno works. Two actual players and two helpers.
>>6373004And who will Join Night Knightess in the battle for Kid's soul?! Firemane?! Fist of god?! Double Wizard?! Kid him self?!
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>6373007Firemane realizes that if Knightess wins it would mean she owned Kid's soul and declares she's throwing her soul in the pot too.
>>6373008Thinking more, this would be a bit bad since they'd both be trying to beat the other to claim the prize.hmmmOh well!
>>6373008She seems mildly excited about the prospect of owning his soul
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>6373012All the things she'd be able to do...Anyway, shuffle!
>>6373014Alright, let's see what we're starting with...
Rolled 31 (1d100)>>6373019Rolling for the cards
>>6373020>31Damn, these are pretty mid cards.
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6373021It's enough, just match the color or number
>>6373023"YEah, as long as nobody cheats or anything, right?"
Rolled 9 (1d100)>>6373028Of course! Start playing.
Rolled 4 + 30 (1d100 + 30)>>6373029
Rolled 88 (1d100)>>6373030
>>6373031"THE FIRST ROUND WENT BY WITHOUT ANY BIG PLAYS! ALL 4 PLAYERS SIMPLY MATCHED THEIR COLORS AND NUMBERS! CLEARLY SAVING THEIR SKIPS AND DRAW CARDS FOR LATER! POISED TO DESTROY THEIR OPPOSITION AT THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITY"
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>6373035How are Firemane and Knightess? Their cards?
>>6373038Well, both are down to 6 cards now. Firemane still got her normal cards. But Night Knightess sure is looking self assured right now. Perhaps she has a plan? A wildcard perhaps? Or a bunch of skips and draws
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6373041She should try to get an add card so she can pile on a big hit on the witch when she throws her down. +4 followed by +2 means a +6 for the one next.
>>6373042"Right you are, Firemane. Thank you for entrusting me with this. I'll take care of Zeke. For both of us"
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6373043The winner of the game is the one who runs out of cards, we're just taking out the witch. Now GO
Rolled 37 + 30 (1d100 + 30)>>6373044The rounds blur past ! Both sides trying to win one over another! Stops, skips and draws are deployed on both sides to devastating effect! With the latest round, the current status is...
Rolled 16 (1d100)>>6373047
Rolled 45 (1d100)>>6373047
>>6373048>>6373049OH SHIT
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>6373054Which color to be, Spooky Witch?Hope we pull some cards on the way. .
Rolled 44 (1d100)>>6373062"DRAW 4! RED!"
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6373064
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>6373064Believe on the pull of the card.
>>6373065>>6373066
Rolled 95 (1d100)>>6373071Reverse + Block her ass
Rolled 55 (1d100)>>6373075"THE OL' REVERSE + SKIP TURN COMBO! NIGHT KNIGHTESS AND FIREMANE MANAGED TO TURN IT AROUND ONTO THE SPOOKY WITCH! CAN THEY KEEP IT UP?!"
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6373083
>>6373086damn, just by onei'm not even gonna roll out of respect for that
>>6373086>>6373087As the turn moves to The Spooky Witch's minion..."SKIP! UNO!"NIGHT KNIGHTESS BLOCKS HIS TURN! IT'S NOW FIREMANE'S TURN! IF SHE THROWS OUR SOMETHING THAT NIGHT KNIGHTESS CAN MATCH, THIS GAME IS OVER!
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>6373092This is the part of the story where Firemane is conflicted over securing the win vs letting the knightess get the pot and win the prize she desperately wantsLuckily for us, thinking and talking is a free action.
>>6373083Some asshole used my IP for proxi and I got banned during this whole session. Is the firemane fag anon making the entire run about firemane again? At least we getting updates.
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6373095t. night knightess
>>6373094DUN DUN
Rolled 1 (1d100)>>6373099Actually I'm a Double wizard and FoG kinda guy. Giving them limited screen time while one anon freaks out over the out comes when firemane isnt on screen.>>6373092 FoG begins to serenade the spooky witch to distract her but his heart is in it so much that she feels the love.
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6373103>1This is FIREMANE TOWN bitch, side characters need not apply
Rolled 77 (1d100)>>6373100Glad I missed that FoG begins to serenade the spooky witch to distract her but his heart is in it so much that she feels the love.
>>6373104
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>6373106Then op shuts th game off and starts a new game.
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>6373106he mad
>>6373110Isn't it odd how this anon always gets the rolls he needs? Seems like he's cheating.
>>6373106Also op, you don't get tired of getting the same anon who dominates the entire game? The moment things don't go his way he takes over and cheats all his rolls. It's obvious he isn't playing fair here.
>>6373110Yeah anon stop being madge
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>6373118Tell him to stop cheating. You can see he gets sloppy now.
Rolled 85 (1d100)>>6373118Let's just go back to the story, Firemane talking to the devil and angel on her shoulder or something.
>>6373118So you are ok with this? >>6373120This is why less and less people start showing up for your threads. This asshole here.
>>6373121>>6373119This is me, my anon is just changed with out my knowledge or permission.
>>6373121You're right, anon, I'm actually secretly hiroshimoot and I'm personally hacking the entire site to rig the dice.
>>6373120"Yo wassup, I'm like, the angel on your shoulder or whatever">>6373121>>6373124Damn, that son of a bitch.
>>6373124Not the first petty thing to be done on this site. Epstien was pulling shit on this site. For you to rig the game is easy as fuck.
>>6373126I'll wait for anon to roll.
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6373126yo angel, so we can let knightess win and stuff but then she'll own kid's soul. that's bad. but if we let her lose then teh witch own the soul. that's also bad.
>>6373132And I'll....go to sleep. It be 3 AM ova here
>>6373134Firemane questions her schizophrenic hallucinations as OP drifts off to sleep
>>6373137Go to bed op. Best to stop since only one anon gets to play the game
>>6373137Thanks for running.
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>6374211Back to anon's EVIL MASTER PLAN for CONTROLLING ALL THE QUESTS
>>6374235GASP!
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>6374257Either way, I believe Firemane was having a discussion with her angel and devil about whether she should risk letting Ezekiel's soul be lost to the witch if it meant kn*ghtess would get it otherwise
>>6374260"Perhaps it's best to have his soul secured first, and think about getting it back from her later""And let her get him all to herself?! Are you mad?!"
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>6374261It's a real conumdrum. Good thing UNO has no time limit on a turn, right?
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>6374263"Yeah""Unless we're playing with some wackass house rules or something"
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6374264oh no
>>6374265"Boss! We lost the box where we kept all the house rules for UNO!""What?! How?! You know we can't apply them without official written documents!"
Rolled 54 (1d100)>>6374269I've got an idea! If we can't win the game ourselves..we'll just tie it! We'll prevent the with from going Uno and then keep it at that until the deck is exhausted.
>>6374271"Of course! Ensuring nobody wins means Kid can get his own soul back!""Or burn the whole casino down. That's always an option"
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6374282Yes, I'm sure they will definitely accept our plan. DO IT
>>6374286"This is it, if Firemane puts down something Night Knightess can match, then it's ov---AND SHE PUTS DOWN A REVERSE TURN?"
Rolled 2 (1d100)>>6374289KEEP STALLINGSTALL UNTIL ONLY YOU AND THE KNIGHT HAVE UNO
Rolled 98 (1d100)>>6374289Reverse reverse reverse uno!
Rolled 46 (1d100)>>6374292>>6374296CAN SHE DO IT?
Rolled 27 (1d100)>>6374297
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>6374297
>>6374304Somehow she did it. The game is dragged on. The deck is gradually drained as we move closer to the finishNight Knightess can be heard subtly signalling to Firemane "Ay yo what the fuck"
Rolled 89 (1d100)>>6374317All recording to plan, Night Knightess. Who know what Lolisniffer going to randomly pull after the end of the game?
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6374317Keep going. If we can tie while firemane and knigthess are in uno but the witch isn't, she won't be able to win.
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6374317This is the end, beautiful friend. This is the end, my only friend. The end of our elaborate plans, the end.
>>6374323
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6374332Lolisniffer pull a wildcard and join in the game, last minute.
>>6374340
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6374346...Wouldn't that just make the deck run out faster?
>>6374349"I mean, the card just says I join at the table. Doesn't say anything about playing....So I'm just sitting here now"
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>6374398Suure. How many cards left in the deck?
>>6374400"Uhhhh, 43 cards, yeah"
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6374409that's too many
Rolled 8 (1d20)>>6374410Yeah well how about you count it smartypants
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>6376196small number
Rolled 56 (1d100)>>6376196Can we count!?
>>6376199
Rolled 4 (1d100)>>6376412draw
Rolled 18 (1d100)>>6376412It's like, what, twenty-six cards left? Yeah, that sounds right.
Rolled 24 (1d100)>>63764128, bery goodnow keep going
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6376412Connect 4, you loose sis!
>>6376585I know what I said....
Rolled 10 (1d100)>>6376585
Rolled 7 (1d100)>>6376604The game is over you now belong to Fist of God Gamble witch and my ward is Mine once again!
Rolled 75 (1d100)>>6376604YOU LOSE
>>6376605Uh oh
>>6376606Oh man thank God you picked that back up
>>6376606
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>6376622
Rolled 90 (1d100)>>6376624"No! Impossible! How can Connect Four win you a game of Uno?! You're bullshitting!"
Rolled 94 (1d100)>>6376638You can't just keep rolling checks until you win
>>6376640What the...
>>6376640
Rolled 17 (1d100)>>6376647See? We win.
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>6376647Now a deal is a deal! You belong to Fist and the boy belongs to firemane again!
>>6376649"Wait a sec, that can't be right, I don't remember making that wager"
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6376654Didn't both Knightess and Firemane throw their souls in the pot too? How does that work?
>>6376655"Yes yes, but I don't remember the Spooky witch being wagered anywhere""Psst. he's distracted. I think we can scram now"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>6376659Yes but we're taking Kid's soul.
>>6376660"Kid's soul is still inside him. Since The Spooky Witch lost(?) the match, it was never taken"
Rolled 74 (1d100)>>6376662nope. it was taken. it's ours now. we own his soul.
>>6376663"YEah sure whatever, time to go"
Rolled 12 (1d100)>>6376668Okay then let's go, Gambling Arc Over
Rolled 28 (1d100)>>6376668Leave before they notice Double Wizard stole a lot of double money from the casino during this whole debacle.
Rolled 63 (1d100)>>6376668While he is distracted spooky witch is taken too, since the wager was two souls, but while he isn't looking, more funny that way.
>>6376697We can gag and tie her up so she doesn't yell for help and makes Fist Of God look like a lunatic.
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6376697Kinda weird bro
Rolled 81 (1d100)>>6376818Oh when it's a chick kidnapping and grooming a young warrior it's acceptable, But a whole party kidnapping a spooky witch tied up in their wagon trunk it's SOME HOW WEEEEEIIIRD HUH!?
>>6376872Well for one thing, there's no kidnapping involving a young warrior.probably
Rolled 59 (1d100)>>6377247Let say FoG convince spooky witch to come along the party.
Rolled 82 (1d100)>>6377259Or maybe he just gets her number? That feels like a better start.
Rolled 20 (1d100)>>6377247You think so ? Or maybe we just need to flash back to the time that happened shall we?
Rolled 21 (1d100)>>6377247That's a "Thinking Cad!" Not a "Thinking Cap" you think you can get away with this!?
>>6377259Of course! Surely he will pick the correct dialogue option
Rolled 99 (1d100)>>6378277Luckily, all holy magic based classes use charisma as a main stat, so FoG should be able to beat that check
>>6378285
Rolled 60 (1d100)>>6378289Alright let's skedaddle
>>6378297And so the party leaves the casino in the confusion, driving straight into the loading screen to fast travel out of the forest and back to the infinite cow horde
Rolled 71 (1d100)>>6378302I got my eye on you boy.
>>6378304
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6378308Observe the cow horde once more.
>>6378310An infinite orchestral of moos
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>6378312Luckily, we have DA WITCH now, who can some for a while so we can pass.
Rolled 50 (1d100)>>6378312Huh, look at that. The gang somehow went in a circle and are back at the King's Castle.
>>6378313Alright gang, how will the Spooky Witch help the party pass the infinite herd?A. Open a portal to the other sideB. Summon a giant skeleton and yeeting the wagon with the party in it over the herdC. Summon her own horde of infinite skeletons, this will help somehowD. [This space for rent]
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>6378315Let's just go with A this sidequest has gone for way too darn long
Rolled 25 (1d100)>>6378315>D. [This space for rent]Everyone gets on her magic broom(bottom) and flys over it. yeet yeet skeet skeet, nowhatimsayin
>>6378316A spoooooky portal is opened and the party drives through! Now there's nothing stopping Firemane n Pals from beelining to the Barbarian Grand War Camp and confront Ezekiel's evil brother
Rolled 35 (1d100)>>6378319Weren't we coming back from a mission?
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>6378319The Portal takes them to the King's Castle instead.
>>6378324man why do you wanna go to the king's castle so bad
>>6378321>>6378324>>6378325You're right anon, the party is actually returning to the guild, but other anon wants to take a detour to the King's castle instead. But why tho
>>6378325because suck my balls that's why
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>6378326>>6378326Hup, forgot my roll
>>6378329
Rolled 92 (1d100)>>6378330Onward, ho!
>>6378331"Halt! What business do you have at the palace?"
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>6378341I don't know, this guy just really wanted us to come here.
>>6378343"Well if you don't have any, feel free to leave. Way back to town's over there"
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>6378345Okay.
Rolled 61 (1d100)>>6378345Alright then, we can leave anon so he can do whatever he wants with the castle. We're going back to base for another intermission period.
>>6378346AND SO...the party heads back to town. And OP goes to sleep cuz i'm drowsy
>>6378349When we get back the king was sadden that he didn't get visitors today while firemane and group go back to turn in their successful mission. Also spooky witch casts disguise, op doesn't have to draw anything new just that everyone sees her as a TOTALLY NORMAL NOT WITCH.
Rolled 91 (1d100)>>6378384Forgot to roll >>6378349
Rolled 93 (1d100)>>6378349vroom vroom vroom
