This is BillHe is King of the HillChallenge him in battle for the right to rule this moundRules of battle are thus:>KOTH and the Challenger each roll 1d6>The current streak is added to the Challenger's roll>The winner is the one with the higher value, KOTH wins a draw>The winner may take the items of the loser>To join post your Challenger with an accompanying image or description>Choose a starting item with one of the following stats>+1 die>+2 pips>+3 value>+1 item>After every 4 wins, KOTH may level up one of their items (essentially a +1 of the item)>2 items can be held at a timeOther caveats:>An orderly queue: every challenger will be gone through in order of appearence, bar consecutive submissions by the same poster>The creator of the current KOTH may choose to continue to roll for their champion>OP will roll in the creator's stead if they do not respond to a challenge within 24 hours, but will not pick up any items or upgrade them>The creator may take back control of their character at any moment, and upgrades will be refunded
+1 item adds an item slot just to clarify
In case I am not present here, the game should be able to operate entirely between the KOTH and the Challengers as well.
Rolled 6, 3 = 9 (2d6)>>6353180Dangit Bill I will show you how to make a king of the Hill.>Sells propane and propane accessories, proud family man. >Item propane, clean burning fuel. Is pro-pain>+1 die
Rolled 4, 6 = 10 (2d6)>>6353213en garde!
Looks like Bill got himself some high grade Texan product on his hands
>>6353233Sneed approaches the hill with intent to kill!>Overalls (+3 value)
Rolled 4, 1, 5 = 10 (3d6)>>6353242Bill readies to face the country bumpkin at full might
Rolled 4 + 3 (1d6 + 3)>>6353243Raaaaagh!
>>6353244Bill prevails even with the streak advantage against him providing a +1 to the farmer's roll. Bill chooses not to undress Sneed in this instance...
>>6353248Well-fought, ye who would be king. But we'll see how much longer you'll rule yet.
Rolled 3 + 3 (1d6 + 3)>>6353180Behold, you are challenged by the might of ANGEL SUMMONER! A well-balanced Superhero with the power to summon an infinite number of immortal, potentially invisible heavenly superbeings to do his bidding.>Item: Infinite horde of Invisible Angels (+3 value)>Also Pictured: BMX Bandit, technically a fellow Super who does... BMX stunts of no applicable value.
>>6353266
Rolled 3, 2, 4 = 9 (3d6)>>6353266Bill can't believe his eyes! A real Superhero... and potentially present and invisible heavenly superbeings.
Seems like Bill still prevailsThe propane tank is running out of gas, so Bill invests in imperishable resources.
Rolled 1, 6 = 7 (2d6)>>6353274Bob the boar is coming to change his top hat for a crown >Top hat (+1 dice)
>>6353578
Rolled 4, 5 + 3 = 12 (2d6 + 3)>>6353578A pig eh? Bill was getting a little hungry
Bill has put up couple pounds, but that is typical for the seasonHe has also attained the 4th victory atop his mound. This allows him to upgrade his Crown (+2 dice). He also picks up the top hat, it'd be rude not to.
Rolled 1, 5 = 6 (2d6)>>6353609Here comes the Mushroom man>Item: Mushroom spores (+1die)
Rolled 2, 5, 3, 5 = 15 (4d6)>>6353746(Bill totally didn't accidentally roll 3d6 when he was supposed to roll 4d6)The mushroom spores seem to be messing with Bill's head, but he holds steadfast.
The mushroom has been overcome. Bill doesn't feel so good after a cocktail of boar meat and mushroom spores, but his tale continues on.
>>6353792An old, white pink wizard does enter the fray;he'll probably lose and he looks kind of gay.He thinks Bill has overextended his stay,so he's doing his best to make him go away.>Hello Kitty patch (+3 value)[how does +2 pips work btw?]
>>6353912D6 +3 value +5 streak
Rolled 4 + 8 (1d6 + 8)Lol
>>6353912pips increase the faces of a die so a +2 pips would increase a d6 to a d8. This applies to all dice, so 2d6 would become 2d8
Rolled 6, 6, 1, 2 = 15 (4d6)>>6353912>>6353913>>6353914Bill is ready to kill, if it is to defend his hill, that is his will, so don't stay still or become crill!
The Wizard joins the gray beard heaven with the Angel Summoner
Rolled 1, 3 + 6 = 10 (2d6 + 6)Morvanth The Manticore approaches Bill, armed with The Manticore's Venom (+1)
Rolled 4, 4, 1, 5 = 14 (4d6)>>6353948That's a weird looking cat or something like that, Bill thinks to himself.
The Manticore has been felled.
Rolled 4, 3 + 7 = 14 (2d6 + 7)Knab The Goblin 'found' this Delver's Sword (+1 die) and approaches the hill... He went to college with Morvanth, and is possessed by his desire for bloody revenge.
Rolled 3, 5, 5, 6 = 19 (4d6)>>6353960Bill is unarmed, but that shouldn't be an issue. He has two pieces of headgear after all!
The Goblin joins his comrade in the pile.Bill proceeds to upgrade his crown once again.If things keep going too much in Bill's favor, I may end up having to spice things up.
Rolled 6, 2 = 8 (2d6)>>6353966>Weilding his King-of-the-hill-inator (+1 extra die) Heinz Doofenshmirtz approaches Bill"You see, as a kid I never got to play king of the hill since not only was my only friend a balloon, I had to stand in front of our yard dressed as a gardengnome. Meanwhile my brother was the neighborhood reigning champion."
Rolled 3, 4, 5, 2, 1 = 15 (5d6)>>6354106Bill should be well disguised in his current attire so that he won't be recognized by Doof in the bowling alley.
>>6354106>8+8=16>15The unthinkable has happened, DOCTOR DOOFENSHMIRTZ TAKES THE HILL FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFESeems like KOTH is in his blood.Now giving him the crown would be the most rational thing but I'll let Doof decide what to take from Bill if anything at all.
>>6354209I won??! Finally something to brag about at the next L.O.V.E.M.UF.F.I.N meeting.>Doof claims the crown for himself
>>6354296The battlefield is cleared of the previous corpses as Dr. Doofenshmirtz takes the hill for himself. The King-of-the-hill-inator is presumably off screen and yet to be destroyed.
The champion is free to roll and play for themselves if they so see fit as long as they follow the rules.
>>6354302"I am Sensei Hot Pot... I wear The Urn of Undeath (+3 Value), and I have come to claim Bill's Hill..."
Rolled 1 + 3 (1d6 + 3)>>6354318
>>6354302Behold, the King-of-the-hill-inator!
Rolled 1, 5, 4, 6, 4 = 20 (5d6)>>6354309>>6354318If I'm right I get an extra 3 dice for the crown and one for the KOTH-inator
>>6354327You are right... Hot Pot just got got
>>6354327Off to a start. Doof is still free to take Hot Pot's loot if they so wish until the next challenger shows up.
I am Jaime Lannister, and I have come to swear fealty to the King Doof en Shmirtz, first of his name, Protector of the Hill and Creator of the King-of-the-hill-inator.Though they name me Kingslayer, I seek nothing more than an oath to keep. If you would have me, King Doof en Shmirtz, I would serve as your Hillsguard and protect you from all foes who seek your death... or die trying.With me, I bring my family's Valyrian Steel longsword, Brightroar, which has been recovered from the Land of Always Summer and the Ruins of Old Valyria. (+1d6)
>>6354350What an intriguing offer. Now I do have to caution that accepting this would require evening the playing field a bit for the challengers in some way, although not to diminish Jaime's assistance to detrimentality.
>>6354357It would actually make sense, I think. Right now (5d6 vs d6+x+1) the KOTH has to roll extremely low while the challenger has to roll decent at the least. A middleman could ease that a bit. Sadly seeing someone choose pips or even moreso +1 item still is highly unlikely, given the probabilities. Not sure how that could be amended.
>>6354414Perhaps after a couple wins challengers could start out with two starting items. Since they already benefit from having the win streak advantage I think this should be slower than the KOTH upgrades. Now as for having another person assisting KOTH I'm thinking that challengers could either start out as a duo or double win streak value addition.
>>6354414>>6354415Yeah, pips doesn't benefit a character until they are operating with more than one die - great item for a King, but it won't make its way to one because it hamstrings a challenger.
Rolled 2 (1d6)>>6354350I'm Bug Dress, faithful servant of Lady Stonehearth. I challenge you to avenge Milady's family! Die, Kingslayer!Equipped with Cookie the normal girl(+1 die)
Rolled 3, 1 = 4 (2d6)>>6354350Again... for real this time...
>>6354445I think I'll start allowing two start items for challengers at some point. Perhaps at the 10 winstreak milestone. That should make pips better.
>>6354350"Wow, my very own minion. With your help I will take over the tri-state are.... I mean defend the hill!!!"
>>6354640Defend the hill then sir >>6354455Low bar to clear
Rolled 6, 5 = 11 (2d6)>>6354455Lady Bug Dress, let our bout be honorable and just in the eyes of the Seven Who Are One! Have at you!
>>6354671"Go now to the Seven Heavens, Lady Bug Dress. A seat awaits you in the Warrior's hall."
All right, while Jaime is in play I'll allow for challengers to appear as duos or to double the streak effect in their rolls. Given the precedent set by Jaime and Bug Dress, each combatant will roll separately and sequentially, so a challenger would have to roll twice first against Jaime and the Doof in this instance. Same goes with double challengers, where the first of the duo rolls first and then the second one if the first one fails. Jaime is free to loot Bug Dress' items if he chooses.
>>6354671>>6354672AAAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEeeeeeeee...>>6354676The only item of Bug Dress was the girl.
>>6354680I suppose then that with a King to protect AND a Fair Maiden rescued, Jaime's morale is as high as can be. He will "equip" Cookie and receive the +1d6 morale boost from her.
All right, the Girl is equipped by Jaime.
Rolled 1 + 3 (1d6 + 3)>>6354735Lay-me the Kinkslayer? Let's see who get laid tonight and if you can slay a Dink too!Dink the Clown, courtesy of Vinnie Mac's biggest brainfarts, enter the arena on his>Clown Car (+3 pips)
>>6353180Just a quick question what is the difference between +2 pips and +3 value?
>>6355138+2 pips adds to the die so 1d6 becomes 1d8 while +3 value adds to the total value so 1d6+3.
Rolled 4, 6, 3, 1, 5 = 19 (5d6)>>6355134
Doof is so powerful...
4 wins for Doof thus far. This means he's free to upgrade his gear.
I am probably going to do some adjustments by win 10 or by the next king.
>>6355182You should know that this is a cool thread, OP, and a refreshing change of pace from more traditional quests
>>6355179While the crown is nice Doof is more familiar with technology than whatever powers it so he uses his newfound experience as king of the hill to upgrade his -inator
>>6355326Your Majesty, my apologies for allowing that clown to approach you. I have... failed in my duty. What penance would you have of me?
>>6355326The thing is running better than ever.
>>6355331"Ehm, for now just keep any platpusses...platypi? away from me. I'll think of a way for you to help me conquer the TRI-STATE AREA later.
Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d8)>>6355422>DOOBEEDOOBEEDOOO DA DOOBEDOOBEEDOO DAITEMS:Agent P's hat: +2 pipsGrappling hook: +1 die
Rolled 1, 3, 2, 5, 4 = 15 (5d6)>>6355422Perry the platypus?!!? How unironic of you to show up right now and by unironic I mean totally ironic.Half hoping Doof loses here since it is Perry
>>6355706Perry misses by one! (but who gave him two starting items?)Doof prevails once more. Perry seems to have vanished without a trace... And suddenly there's some other platypus here.
>>6355706
Honestly I think having two starting items would spice things up a little.
>>6355724Oh crap I misread, I thought you allowed two items when you mentioned it.here >>6354472
>>6355726Ahh yeah, my bad. I intended for it to wait until the next king or by win 10. I'll let Doof decide if he's fine with two starting items.
>>6355728I'm fine with it, after all it's more fun if we get more winners instead of just one person successfully defending all the time
Rolled 8, 1 + 5 = 14 (2d8 + 5)>>6355836Carrie White, Prom Queen,trying to become queen of the hill too!Prefers to fight Jaime first, but will take anyone on.>Prom Night Dress (+1d6)>Pig's blood (+2 Pips)>Streak bonus +5 (less for Jaime?)
>>6356095>Covered in blood at a party, heh? That reminds me of yet another tragic backstory
Rolled 1, 2, 3, 1, 5 = 12 (5d6)>>6356189Whoops forgot to toll
>>6356402THE KING IS DEAD LONG LVE THE KING
>>6356402Shouldn't Doof get another d6 (1 standard, 3 for the crown, 2 for the KOTHinator)?If you don't roll another one (or get a 1), she will grab the crown and ditch the dress (or replace it with some other no-bonus dress) while keeping the pigs blood on her.
>>6356470Yeah, there's still a die to be cast. Although technically the streak bonus would be doubled with Jaime around, he hasn't been seen in a while.
>>6356472He is sleeping on the job
Rolled 3 (1d6)>>6356402Well since it's been a day let's see what happens
Well as far as I see it the doubled streak bonus still applies since Jaime is on the hill. This'd make Carrie the new Queen, although I suppose it'd be fair for Jaime to still to be able to roll to defend his liege if he shows up.
Rolled 2, 1, 1 = 4 (3d6)MY LIEGE GET DOWN!
>>6357222>Jaime, having been once again distracted from duty by his sister, rushes in and jumps infront of his King to take the killing blow for him!
If Carrie had to fight both at the same time, that'd be a draw. I'll wait for KOTHposter to give out a ruling before celebrating victory.
>>6357237It'd be a separate roll actually. Since Jaime came back you're up.
Rolled 2, 5 = 7 (2d8)>>6357387
>Don't pick anything from Jaime
>>6357452The king has been dethroned!From now on, two starting items are permitted.
>>6357458"Curse you, Carrie the teenage girl! Huh, if I had a nickel for every time I said that or at least something very similar, I'd have two nickels. It isn't much but it is weird that it happened twice."
Is that the corpse of Jaime Lannister? Hah!This hill doesn't look that hard to take. With my trusty hounds (+1d) and Sir Twenty of House Goodmen (+1d) at my side, it'll fall just like Winterfell.
Rolled 1, 1, 1 = 3 (3d6)>>6357515My lord, you forgot to roll.
Rolled 6, 3, 8, 7 = 24 (4d8)>>6357516And here I thought you wanted to invite me to the dance! Curse you, popular kids!
Rolled 1, 4 + 3 = 8 (2d8 + 3)What's that? A Whitemane Under Hunter from the long forgotten Minor Xenos Quest Redux with his War Yoyo (+2 Pips) and a Lunar Dahu Mount (+1d) are raiding the hill!
>>6357545Ramsay goes down
>>6357569The streak bonus is +2 right now, so this'd be a 7
Rolled 6, 5, 7, 6 = 24 (4d8)>>6357569Another cool kid that never shared it's toys with me. *sobs* WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU!!
>>6357574So... How does the "+1 Item" work?like it will grant a choice of 3 item?
>>6357644If I understood it correctly here >>6353181 one can usually only hold two items and this one adds an additional item slot.Sadly if it also uses up one the jet gain is zero and even if it did actually provide an extra one, there's not much sense in taking it as a contender (unless the streak bonus is absurdly high) and the KOTH can't take a new item afaik.Maybe KOTHposter will introduce it as a special bonus or sth like that, who knows.
>>6357679Yeah that one is pretty useless ATM. Perhaps it ought to be a +2 items which only upgrades by one each time.
Actually I think what I'll do is that for contenders +1 item works as an item copy of their other starting item, and then adapts it's intended function for the KOTH. It would start out pretty useless, but you could upgrade it to gain an extra slot.
It's me, Aether, the protagonist of hit character collection game Genshin Impact. You probably know me from the absurd amount of hentai that exists for all the female characters. I'm the camera guy, a connoisseur who specializes in getting all the best angles for the viewer's enjoyment.But that's just the side gig. The main job's being your friendly neighborhood murderhobo, beating the crap out of indigenous masked demon-fiends and seeking the truth of this world. Since I don't buy the whole "my spaceship's AI has been terraforming this planet" because that's stupid, I'm still looking out for new clues. Maybe conquering this hill will lead me to it.I'm bringing my ever reliable Dull Blade (+1d) and my Emergency Food. Well, really, my Emergency Food is just following me around because she gets anxious when I leave her, and as annoying as she is I can't say no to that face. Besides, she helps manage my inventory (+1 item, copies the Dull Blade for +1d).
Rolled 3, 6, 5 = 14 (3d6)Traveler, you forgot to roll! Seriously, what would you do without Paimon?
Rolled 1, 3, 8, 7 = 19 (4d8)Ganging up on me again? Taking photos while I'm drenched in blood? For everyone to laugh at me? DIE!
>>6358012That was pretty close. Guess I'll keep the girl (+1 item) and upgrade the pigs blood to +4 pips.Maybe they will finally leave me alone, now that I have a possibly popular friend?
The emergency food has been snatched by Carrie!
Rolled 2, 5, 6 = 13 (3d6)My name... is Oliver Queen. I spent five years on a hellish island with only one goal: survive.Now I've returned to root out the corruption that infests my city... starting with this hill!(Bow and Boxing Glove Arrow for +2d)
Rolled 10, 4, 9, 3 = 26 (4d10)Oh, now I have to compete with a BOY for the title of queen? Boys should bow and keep their little arrows tucked away!
Ollie misses the shot and joins the pile of men beaten by Carrie.
Rolled 6, 6, 5, 5 = 22 (4d6)>>6358556Hehehe... poor girl, covered in pig blood. Let me take you of that dress ASAP... *licks his lips in a suspicious way*ItemsChloroform +1die Rope: +1die
>>6358573G'day sir, you seem to have brought with you one too many dice.
>>63585812d6 plus two dice items
Rolled 1, 6, 5, 1 = 13 (4d10)[anon rolled high and steak bonus would've been 5 anyway, so I'll accept the 22 as target number - but yeah, should've been 1d+2d+5]Finally, somebody sees the condition I am in and wants to help! I wonder why Paimon taps me on the shoulder all the time though? If you're tricking me, you will pay!
>>6358622No, you shouldn't be so trusting! Paimon thinks this guy is bad news... Paimon saw him in some of the films that Traveler made when Mona was short on mora...(Off in the distance, Aether can be seen hanging upside down from a tree, his camera over one eye as he gives the Respectable Gentleman a thumbs up.)
>>6358622-PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP- "GET PREGNANT, GET PREGNANT WITH MY CHILD, YOU DAMN BRAT!""Fweew, that brat sure milk me dry... Why are you still here, Bloody Girl? Can't you see I'm trying to impregnate this fairy thing! Go away!"
>>6358630Hold on, hold on, hold on! This is a blue board! Traveler was allowed to allude to that sort of thing happening off screen, but you can't just do that while the Mods are watching! What if they drop a Nail of Threadbanning upon it.(Aether calls out from the distance, camera rolling: "Same rates as last time, old timer?")
>>6358640The mods should do as they please, I've already won.
>>6358645so uhh, what exactly shall you be taking from the former queen?
>>6358735Sounded to me like he was taking Paimon desu \_0_/
>>6358744I just wonder if he'll take the crown
>>6358746The crown and Paimon
>>6358749You keeping the Rope or the Chloroform?
Rolled 4, 7 = 11 (2d8)Lining up the challenger : Generic Human Fighter!Items: Longsword (+1d)Helm (+2 pip)
>>6358751Rope
Rolled 1, 2, 5, 2 = 10 (4d6)>>6358756Bratty Gigachad needs ojisan correction too...
That was fast *runs for his life*
Human Fighter will take the Paimon as a squire and give it its helm; keeping the Crown to himself.Items : >Crown (+3d)>Paimon (+1 Item)>Helm (+2 Pip)
>Paimon got pumped and dumpedmany such cases!
>>6358887Paimon thanks you for saving her from the fate of becoming an unwilling Paimom... UNLIKE A CERTAIN SOMEONE WHO WAS JUST RECORDING WITH HIS CAMERA!(Aether just gives her a thumbs up. Knight x Squire Romance is good too.)
>>6358994She's still bearing the Ugly Bastard's child though.
Rolled 4, 3, 2 = 9 (3d6)>>6358887Ginko was told that there was someone here who is so strong that she might die! Let us have a good fight. Glory to the winner, and an honorable death to the loser!Ginko brings her Katana and her Iron Bow for +2d in total!>>6359055"Wait, it wasn't a dangerous day when Traveler's hefty friend used her as his Paimonahole! HOW!?"
Rolled 2, 8, 1, 1 = 12 (4d8)Having somehow lost his longsword, Generic Human Fighter is not bothered in any way.>>6358994>>6359055Nah Squire is for teaching not romancing.Used goods anyway
The two warriors clash but the King prevails!
>>6359121>Be me>Human Fighter>Got a cushy position as King of The Hill>Assaulted by an Extreme Orient Wench>"Take your sword! I challenge you to a duel!">Lost said longsword in the defeated ojisan fat rolls, too much self-esteem to recover it.>Tell Paimon to deal with the nuisanceRoll 1,1>Paimon suffered an arrow to the midsection and a sword slash, saved by her Helmet.>ThanosWillDoItHimself.png>Throw the crown on the bow>Close the distance>Supplex the harlotUndefeated King of the Hill.
Rolled 5 + 6 (1d6 + 6)I see through the illusions of this vile human.I'm sure it must be some kind of bipedal fox taking the form of a generic humanoïd to deceive us.It will not see me coming thanks to my deployable stealth BUSH !!>Pickaxe for extra damage>Deployable BUSH for maximum STEALTH
( Items "Pickaxe" and "DEPLOYABLE STEALTH BUSH" gives +3 each )
Rolled 2, 2, 4, 7 = 15 (4d8)>>6359149>>6359150EN GARDE, vile peasant!
>>6359151The human fighter seemingly cannot be amBUSHed that easily.
Rolled 6, 4 = 10 (2d8)>>6359220A chuuni doll appears! She is dead-set on claiming the crown, as befits royalty!With her chains (+1 die) and her eyes made from crystallized demon blood (+2 pips), she seeks to bind the warriors soul!
Rolled 1, 3, 3, 6 = 13 (4d8)>>6359272Nah, I'd win.
>>6359272>>6359277I think it's a draw thanks to Streak bonus - so another win for KOTH HumanFighter!>Upgrade Paimon to 2 items>Give Paimon Crystallized Demon Blood
Rolled 3, 6, 5 = 14 (3d6)It has been 2077 years since the death of Himmel the Hero.Human Fighter, you seem like a good and reliable man. Let's have a bout. If I defeat you, I want you to go court my Apprentice's descendent. Poor girl keeps shutting herself in her room, a man like you could get her some sunshine... and ensure that there's another generation of Stark and Fern's descendants for me to dote on. I'll spend a decade or so turning this hill into the ideal playground for them.If you defeat me, I'll give you the two special items that I brought with me. One of them is a collaborative work between myself and Lady Serie, a grimoire containing every slur for those filthy predators that mimic human appearance and speech patterns named 'Demons' (+1d). All of them, from all throughout human history, we were quite thorough. As for the other... it pains me to think of parting with it, but I'll give you my limited edition Aura head (+1 Item)."Frieren, what the FU-"
>>6359278The bounty of the king is lavish as ever
Rolled 8, 7, 4, 4 = 23 (4d10)>>6359286Smart move, making the "lose" reward more interesting than the "win" one.Anyway, I won't go easy on you
>>6359301Damn, you've got hands Human Fighter. Haven't seen a sword form like that since Himmel the Hero.Anyways, here's the Grimoire, and... [Aura, say hello to Human Fighter]"Hello."
>>6359309(puzzled as the longsword somehow got lost)
Human fighter has 5 item slots right now (the +1 items take up a slot themselves, so Aura in a way is useless), so the grimoire would have to take place of another item if equipped.
>>6359479
>>6359479Although if we want to make +1 items more useful we could forgo them taking up a slot, but they'd still upgrade by 1.
>>6359481I'd say they're good as is with the copy effect and the requirement to invest an upgrade first.
>>6359481I think they're fine as is
>>6359484>>6359495Allright
Rolled 7, 4 + 5 = 16 (2d8 + 5)>>6359480Oh no, Worf's been afflicted with protomorphosis, activating his ancestors' territorial aggression! He wants that hill!He's equipped with:>Crustacean claws (+1 die)>Space-testosterone (+2 pips)
Rolled 9, 3, 3, 1 = 16 (4d10)>>6359562Another day, another beating for worf's sorry ass
Thanks QM for "Win on ties"
>>6359568How does he do it?
>>6359569He's just built different
Rolled 6, 3 + 6 = 15 (2d8 + 6)>>6359572Firing Main Cannon.(+1d, 2 pip)
Rolled 7, 3, 8, 8 = 26 (4d10)>>6359588canon counter : fist to the face
>>6359595POW!
Rolled 4, 5, 1 + 7 = 17 (3d6 + 7)A pixelated puppy is looking for a hooman...>2nd head (+1d)>3rd head (+1d)
Rolled 3, 2, 9, 7 = 21 (4d10)>>6359602Can I keep winning?
Alright. I'll do the funny : >Improve Aurahead (+2 Items)>GETS the 3rd head (+1d)
Cute doghead
Rolled 2, 1, 6 + 8 = 17 (3d6 + 8)Fighter.You have grown powerful through your many battles. The Fast Bastard. The Samurai. The Pixaxe Warrior. The Doll. The Elf from the Future. The Afflicted Warrior. The Flying Septa. The Cerberus.All of these challengers I have sent your way that you might become strong enough to face what comes. To face the Long Night and bring forth the Dawn. To slay the Great Other, as your destiny was written three hundred years ago.Your TRUE NAME is CHADAERON TARGARYEN, trueborn son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark. YOURS is the Song of Ice and Fire.And I am your final test. Should I best you here, go then to the North and the Wall. Lightbringer awaits for you, and with it your destiny. I shall plant a Sapling of the Old Gods here to spread the roots and allow you better coordination with the Greenseers.Should you best me here, then I will rest among the roots of the Old Gods soundly, knowing that this hill shall be the unbreakable bastion of Humanity. The Great Other will not be able to take it.>Bloodraven brings the Valyrian Steel Rapier DARK SISTER (+1d) and a Sapling Weirwood to plant (+1 Item, Mimics DARK SISTER for now).
Rolled 3, 9, 2, 10, 2 = 26 (5d10)>>6359649Nah, my name is Hector "the well endowed" you must be confused
The warrior has triumphed over their opponent once more
Rolled 6, 5, 2 + 9 = 22 (3d6 + 9)>>6359676"Mon dieu"...Having wandered at random out of the sea, the French Crayfish is terrified at the amount of bodies littering the ground. Yet, he knows he must take down the perpetrator.With his claws (+1 die) and his mastery of the verb (+1 item, mimicking the claws), he bravely sets out...
>>6359651Brynden looks down at his notes again when the Fighter doesn't name himself Jon Snow."Oh shit, I got the wrong guy. My bad. Good luck with your hill."The ground opens up and the roots of some trees swallow him, dragging him below the surface of the earth. He doesn't seem particularly bothered by it. Dark Sister is left behind, and the Weirwood sapling seems to implant itself in the ground to grow for the benefit of those who learn to wield its power.
Rolled 2, 8, 1, 2, 3 = 16 (5d10)>>6359680Hello, dinner
>>6359880Looks like the diner has become the dined
>>6359880Even a Chad can't fight with an empty stomach.
"J'ai gagné!"Having defeated the human fighter who had wanted to make a meal out of him, the French Crayfish picks up the crown and wears it atop his head. Clicking his claws, he frees Paimon from his employ, letting her keep the helm, buries the two decapitated heads, and encrusts the crystallized demon blood within his crown.Items: Claws (+1 dice), Crown (+3 dice), Mastery of the verb (+1 item), Crystallized Demon Blood (+2 pips) He now awaits he who would dare fight his monarchy...
Rolled 6, 4, 6 = 16 (3d6)>>6359925Hey why the hell did you bury me! I'm a head that's been decapitated for over 2000 years. Damn elf leaving me with that stupid fighter - HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!Aura brings 2000 years of mana and her horns for +2d.
>>6359925You'd actually need +1 slot to afford 4 items. We could transfer the essence of Paimon or Aura to the Mastery of the verb since they're the same type of item...
To keep things interesting going forward, I propose that an ascendant king may only have 4 items. This way we don't end up with an endless hoard of items, although one can get more items by defeating challengers.
The crustacean crawls to it's hill.
Rolled 7, 3, 8, 6, 6 = 30 (5d8)>>6359954Ah, I think I misunderstood the (+1 item) thingy... Thank you for letting me make up for it!>>6359953"Terrifiant ! Un mort-vivant!"
>>6359973Waaaaaaaaaaaaa~ah!(It looks like Aura's blasting off again! Riiiiight back into Cyberpunk Frieren's handbag, where she belongs)I was - *sniff* - I was gonna be the strongest and get my revenge...
Rolled 2, 3, 6 + 2 = 13 (3d6 + 2)This looks like a nice hill.>Shirt : +1d>Cuteness : +1d
Rolled 4, 1, 5, 3, 8 = 21 (5d8)>>6359982The French Crayfish worries for his shell! A goblin would gobble him up whole, and uncooked!
>>6359973Aura is beaten once more
>>6359984The goblin won't be toppling this hill yet
Rolled 2, 4, 2 = 8 (3d6)Oh no! An extremely dangerous beast attacks, armed with two exceptionally large weapons (+2d)!
Rolled 1, 3, 2, 6, 5 = 17 (5d8)>>6360263The beast's defences must be cut! The crayfish puts his claws to work!
>>6360276The beast is felled! The crayfish may now upgrade it's gear for further foes.
>>6360283"Magnifique..."Having experienced many fearsome foes, the French Crayfish will turn his battles into poems, further improving his mastery of the verb to +3 items.
Rolled 3, 1, 5 = 9 (3d8)If any crustacean is going to wear a crown it should be the mantis shrimp, because it is the most awesome and bestest animal according to Matt Inman.Super Cavitation strike +1dieRainbow Carapace +2 pips
>>6360413((Whoops, just ignore that last die. I'm almost certainly going to lose anyway.))
Lining up...Tux!Alongside his superior operating system (+1d) and a crowd of endoctrined neckbeards (+1d)
Rolled 3, 2, 3 + 5 = 13 (3d6 + 5)>>6360415
>>6360413The shrimp shivers in front of the crayfish who is free to loot it's belongings before taking on Tux
Rolled 1, 1, 8, 4, 4 = 18 (5d8)>>6360413The French Crayfish grows arrogant... He thinks his rule cannot be challenged, least of all by another crustacean!>>6360421Don't know why the winning screen appeared just yet, but the French Crayfish will steal the rainbow carapace for his own!
Rolled 10, 1, 7, 2, 8 = 28 (5d10)>>6360416Penguins are a natural predator of crayfish, are they not? It's about time they're taught a lesson!
Rolled 5, 5, 3 + 6 = 19 (3d6 + 6)With my genius mathematics, I - Cirno - have created a wondrous flying robot!Now have at thee!
Penguin down! Someone should reboot it.
Rolled 4, 2, 3, 1, 10 = 20 (5d10)>>6360546"U-un mecha??"Such a monstrosity is NOT allowed in the crayfish's kingdom! Even if it's, well, kind of cool....
>>6360620Cirno got brain freeze!
Look Out: It's Strahd Von Zarovich!He brings with himself a lot of mommy issues crystallized in a Portrait of Tatyana (+1d) and the deed of vampiric ruler of the land of Barovia (+1d)
Rolled 5, 5, 1 + 7 = 18 (3d6 + 7)>>6360664
Rolled 5, 10, 3, 8, 9 = 35 (5d10)>>6360665"A genoux!"
Rolled 2, 1, 1 + 8 = 12 (3d6 + 8)WE SHALL ENTRUST THE DREAMS OF THIS HILL TO OUR SUCCESSORS.THOUGH WE RIDE NOW TO CERTAIN DEATH, MY SOLDIERS DO NOT BUCKLE OR FALL.MY SOLDIERS PUSH FORWARD.MY SOLDIERS SCREAM OUT.MY SOLDIERS RAAAAAAAAAGE!Erwin charges to certain doom against the French Crayfish, bringing with him HIS SOLDIERS (+1 Item, mimics HIS INDOMITABLE WILL) and HIS INDOMITABLE WILL (+1d)
>>6360844Strahd stumbles off of the side of the hill!It is once more upgrade time for the crustacean king.
>>6360889Guess he'll die instead of ride
Rolled 11, 2, 5, 6, 3 = 27 (5d11)>>6360973Having polished the stolen rainbow carapace, it's even stronger now! More flamboyant! Moreso than the sun itself! (+3 pips I assume)>>6360889"Pitoyable..."Such determination only invites disdain from the crustacean.
>>6361189Its actually +4 pips now
Rolled 1, 6, 2 + 9 = 18 (3d6 + 9)The Fluffy Servant and world's biggest thot approach the Hill with questionable intent!She has her sparkly crown and floofy coat to aid her, both giving +1 dice!
Rolled 5, 3, 1, 7, 12 = 28 (5d12)>>6361365"Très mignonne !"The crustacean is smitten with the greatest Rider Servant! He attempts a capture!
>>6361575and another win!
Rolled 5, 5, 2 = 12 (3d6)The french lobster is a MENACE!AND I WON'T LET IT SKITTER AROUND NO MORE! AS TRUE AS MY NAME IS JAY JONAS JAMESON(with a cigar and heart medicine, both +1d)
Rolled 11, 6, 11, 1, 11 = 40 (5d12)>>6361587"Mort à la presse libre!"The shelled king of the hill goes to clip JJJ's mustache!
Is it ethical to attack the media? Ehh well he started it.
