>>82454419
>Finally, i have someone worth fighting for
Because this is an illusion. If you cannot fight for yourself, you will not fight for someone else. At least not for very long. This is what incels simply do not recognize. They lack the real world experience.

But, telling this to an incel is wasted effort. They don't want to recognize the truth of the reality. They want to hide behind copium.

>>82454461
KEK yeah because women are really just CLAMORING over themselves to be with the average man

>>82454461
wrong, it happened to me before. this normie gaslighting of "love yourself before you can love others!" while they received constant positive reinforcement, internalized it and built healthy self-esteem only to then claim they 'worked for it' by loving themselves first is compete bs.
A girl DID give me attention before and it DID turn my life around

>>82454526
Wow, that's some abysmally bad reading comprehension you have there.
What in the fuck does that hve to do with what I said?

But, yes, they actually are.

>>82454419
you just wind up getting comfortable and that leads you to become less and less performative

>>82454529
If it turned your life around, you wouldn't need it again, since your life would've been turned around. So it clearly didn't turn your life around, it just gave you a temporary moment of relief from your own thoughts, which you refuse to actually fix.
External validation is a fools game. All you're doing is using another person to avoid your own problems, then once that person is gone your problems are worse than before you were with them.

Sure, you can love someone without loving yourself. But if you don't love yourself you're going to ruin every relationship you're in. Not only that, you're going to ruin yourself even more. You will sabotage your relationship over and over and over again because your real thoughts about yourself still exist. Those self loathing self hating thoughts don't go away, they're just hidden. And hidden thoughts control your life.
That self hate will bleed into your relationship. It's inevitable. Unavoidable.
You cannot. Cannot. Cannot. Fix yourself with a relationship. It does. not. work.

Real transformation is permanent. All that changed was your environment. You did not actually change yourself.

>>82454535
Holy fuck, it's a direct response to what you said, retard.
>But, yes, they actually are.
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA OH YOU'RE FUNNY ANON LMAO
Kill yourself gaslighting cunt

>>82454632
>Holy fuck, it's a direct response to what you said, retard.
Anon, what the fuck are you talking about? You responded to literally nothing I said, and just said some random shit that was completely irrelevant to anything I said.

Are you trolling or just retarded?

You're not looking for a gf with this attitude.
>"Finally, i have someone worth fighting for and putting my life together"
What you're looking for with this attitude is a child you can adopt. A protege. You are seeking to be the father, mentor, protector. NOT lover.

>Are these just men who have been in the same relationship for over 5 years and 'lost the spark' or what.
These men were looking for a lover, but their lover (the woman) instead turned herself into a child during those 5 years. There comes a point when fucking your "protege" becomes a tiresome affair.

For more info, read - "The Polygamous Sex" by Esther Vilar.

>>82454666
You are actually fucking retarded because you were talking about how people should "fight" for someone and I said YEAH, BECAUSE WOMEN ARE REALLY CLAMORING OVER EACH OTHER TO DATE THE AVERAGE GUY.
I'm not the fucking retard here, sorry you actually are incapable of reading and you're such a dense cunt. Hope your house burns down with you in it.

>>82454693
>you were talking about how people should "fight" for someone
That is not what I said at all. You completely misunderstood what I said, and the point of my post.

In my first post, I was responding specifically to this by the OP:
>"If i had a gf I'd be filled with so much vitality and optimism like "Finally, i have someone worth fighting for and putting my life together"."
I was talking about how this is an illusion. It's just putting paint over rotten wood, metaphorically speaking. It does not solve the problem OP has, it just diverts the attention away so that the problem can fester and seep into the relationship.

If you cannot put your life together for yourself, you cannot put you life together for someone else. This is because someone else cannot solve your own problems. All this does is keep you trapped in a perpetual cycle of:
>Get into relationship
>Feel really good for a while
>Get depressed because I still hate myself
>Project hate onto partner
>Make partner feel like shit
>They want to leave
>"I NEED YOU IF YOU LEAVE I'LL KILL MYSELF"
>They stay for a while
>But you're rotting them from the inside
>They ghost you/blow up on you
>You feel worse than when you got into the relationship
>You find a new copium relationship
>The cycle repeats

Another person cannot fix you. It's just not possible. You have to fix yourself. But before that, you have to WANT to fix yourself. And if you wanted to fix yourself, you'd do it without the pretense of a relationship.
If you need someone else to motivate you to get something, you don't want that something.

But, still; yes. Women are clamoring for average men. If you went outside, you'd see that.

>>82454419
>Are these just men who have been in the same relationship for over 5 years and 'lost the spark' or what.
Yes. Its always the married people who are most miserable.

>>82454419
>If i had a gf I'd be filled with so much vitality and optimism like "Finally, i have someone worth fighting for and putting my life together"
Unfortunately, that wears off after a while. Longest I've ever maintained it was roughly a year. It's fantastic having that energy while it lasts, but you can't sustain it, no matter how much you try and start getting positive habits in and making changes while it lasts.

>External validation is a fools game. All you're doing is using another person to avoid your own problems, then once that person is gone your problems are worse than before you were with them.
Keep in mind we're on the board full of undiagnosed autistic men who've been rejeceted by everyone their entire lives for reasons neither they or the people who rejected them understand. You two clearly mean different things when you say external validation. You mean other people praising you and blowing smoke up your ass. He means other people accepting his existence and treating him like they treat everyone else.