Do you think you treat people well in general anon? What I noticed about myself is that I tend to not care that much about the person itself once all is said and done. I am lonely when I do not have enough companionship, but it could be filled by a lot of people. I do not find myself loving or caring about individual people very much. I view other people as characters that hopefully add something to my life, rarely do I actually care about them much as individuals.
>>82472819Likewise. I can tell I'm defective in some sort of way when it comes to how I value my relationships with people close to me, but I just can't bring myself to see those relationships as sacred and worth protecting. Friends come and go. Blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb, etc. etc.
>>82472819>Do you think you treat people well in general anon?usuallyi won't give them nice treatment if they don't deserve it, but by default they doonly evildoers don't deserve that kind of treatment>rarely do I actually care about them much as individuals.that's normal behavior, isn't it?if we cared about everyone we met, we couldn't function
>>82472863>that's normal behavior, isn't it?if we cared about everyone we met, we couldn't functionRecently I lost a friend I knew since middle school (so it has been a while) and mostly it just sucks because that is one less person to hang out with. I do not miss the individual that much. If I met another chill person to fill that space I think it would be fine by me. I am not sure how normal that is.
>>82472819>I am lonely when I do not have enough companionship, but it could be filled by a lot of people.You'll just end up with shitty friend after shitty friend, if you could even call them friends.
>>82472819unless I am involved in a common activity with the other person, be it work, school, or some sort of project, I just stop looking for the person. That is, I don't try to reach out to know how they are doing even though I still think about them, for fear of being bothersome or being bad at conversations not related to said common activity
>that's normal behavior, isn't it?It's not at all, people miss friends or loved ones and see them as individuals. The memories and connections we make to others are what make us human. It is however normal to not feel deeply for random people you have no connection towards.
>>82472934>I am not sure how normal that is.it's fairly fucked, not gonna liebut it all comes down to what we care about, me i care about the individuals i surround myself with instead of just the company itselfthere are people who are the reverse though, e.g. you, and while i view that as incredibly selfish, you're not really harming anyone, i hope
>>82472998I appreciate the honestly It could come from low self esteem perhaps. A lot would say that I do not respect myself much as an individual/do not love myself enough we. So perhaps that extends to friends and other individuals somehow. I do actually have some friends now (2 people come to mind) that I feel a bit more for. But I wonder whether if those relationships would just fade I'd feel the same way we are talking about here. Chances are kinda high.
>>82472819I try to be polite whenever I can. No reason to be a dick for no reason. That being said, I'm not generally a helpful person. I still prioritize myself.
>>82472819I avoid people, so yeah, I do treat them well
>>82472858Would you say that it has a negative effect on you life or do you just hide it well?
>>82472819I do (if I have a reason). Talking to other people, for me, is mostly a chore.
>>82472934i always find myself thinking like that, valuing people for what they provide for me and not for who they are, even with family and close friends. not sure if i'm a sociopath or something but i behave normally in society, just don't feel that much pain from loss
>>82472819Thanks a lot, that pic made me go watch porn and masturbate for 90 minutes. Thanks, I really had nothing better to do with my time. Really, thank you, it was totally necessary to post such image, it fits the thread theme so well.
>>82472956This, but it's a trade-off. Viewing people as expendable gets you lots of peons but certainly not equals.
>>82472819too well. time to rectify that hard
>>82472819>Do you think you treat people well in general anon?Really, really well. I don't slur IRL, I always address people as "Mr./Mrs." (or just their first name if we"re closer, I hate using nicknames), I give gifts even on small occasions. I'm generally well liked, but I said all of this so I can talk about the rest of your post, because I relate to you. >What I noticed about myself is that I tend to not care that much about the person itself once all is said and done. Neither do I. I see socialization for what it is: smoke and mirrors. I try to be as friendly as possible while not getting too close to anyone, so thatvpeople won't bother me too much.I won't say it's the best strategy out there, but it has worked well for me so far. >I am lonely when I do not have enough companionship, but it could be filled by a lot of people.In this we diverge, I feel very happy when I get to not see or talk to anyone for a week, for instance.>I do not find myself loving or caring about individual people very much. I view other people as characters that hopefully add something to my life, rarely do I actually care about them much as individuals.I think you're idealizing "loving" and "caring" a bit, but I get what you're saying.Unless you're a total douchebag, which you probably aren't because you have a bit of instropection apparently, it's unlikely there is no one youblove or care about at least in small ways, I've come to the conclusion that most people are like this actually, and that talk is cheap. Quite a lot of people have said "I love you" to me in my life, at most 2 actually meant it. Maybe.From what I gather you seem concerned that you treat people in a cold and detached manner, is that correct?
>>82472819It all depends on how they treat me.If they are struggling with shit and do that retard bullshit where they don't say anything and expect you to just know, no, I don't, because I don't pick up on it, and then when they lose their shit at me for not magically knowing they were going through shit, I tell them to fuck off and learn to use their words like a goddamn adult.If someone tells me they're struggling though, I will do whatever I think will help with no expectations of actual results, avoiding that 'I hung out with you once, why isn't your depression cured?' bullshit. I will just make them and doing shit we enjoy/used to enjoy doing together a priority.I try never to use things against people. Example. I used to play DnD with this tranny. You know the archtype, the one that doesn't actually put in any work, doesn't even try to be more feminine, and just talks about politics constantly. Once, I was having a really stressful day, she wouldn't shut up about politics, after I'd been very clear I have no interest in them or discussing them, and I yelled at her something like 'if you're gonna keep going on about that crap, get the fuck out.' After about ten seconds I apologized, explained that I was frustrated about other things and her disrespecting my dislike for political topics was not the core problem, just the last one on the pile, and acknowledged it was wrong of me to lose my temper at her like that, and that I regretted it. Still, this was the start of the end. She slowly started going on about 'not feeling safe around me' and that kind of bullshit. Started turning everything I said or did into some sort of cryptic hatespeech , trying to turn friends against me. I was fucking furious. Shouted at her, kicked her the fuck out of my life. At no point did I misgender her or the like. Sure, it's an easy low blow that would have worked. But I didn't want to hurt her or make her cut or whatever, I just couldn't deal with the way she was acting.
>>82472819I treat them 100x better than they ever treat me, and recently I've been getting fatigued by this. I'm ready to start treating people poorly
>>82472819>Do you think you treat people well in general anon?I try to, yes. Though I spent 98% of my time alone, and I rarely get small talk from staff at places I eat and drink at.One of my two friends I see now and again, but he's busy with a family.There's a distant relative I see a few times a year. He's busy with waging and traveling.Though I have a tendency to vent and overshare with them, I make a point of asking how they are doing, and ask them questions.
